Twisted Love

by R. C. Stephens

  “You’re a strong girl, I know you’ll be okay, you always are,” I grinned hoping to reassure her.

  “You really believe that?” she asked drawing her eyebrows together and crunching up her face. If only she understood how adorable I thought she was.

  “You’re brave and strong, don’t ever doubt that,” I assured her again. Lexi had a very different picture of herself than the one I held of her, and I was going to change that, I wanted to make my angel shine.

  “A penny for your thoughts?” I smirked.

  “Oh Dylan, I’ve made a lot of mistakes. Dr. Newman is helping me work through my issues, but you don’t have to feel guilty about anything, and I’m not your responsibility, you don’t have to stick by me through this mess. You have school, and maybe if you back away, Luc will drop the charges. You have a life to live, I’ve never wanted to hold you back and I don’t want to hold you back now either,” she said not taking a break to even breathe through her words. This must be bothering her if she brought it up this way. I need to do something about this. I stood up from my stool and made my way around the breakfast bar. I took my hand and tilted her chin so that her perfect dark blue eyes, reminiscent of a blue wildflower, were gazing directly into me. She was my wild card, I never knew what to expect with her.

  “Lexi, give me a little credit here. I know you aren’t ready to hear my feelings for you, but believe I’m not sticking around out of guilt or any sense of responsibility. I’m sticking around because you’re the fucking love of my life and I will never walk away from you again.” I knew my words were intense and they may cause her to run, but I was also sick of running myself. Something had to give and fast. Her mouth dropped into a large O. I wanted to claim her lips and pick her up and take her to bed, but she was definitely not ready for that.

  I couldn’t resist and I allowed my lips to move in and slowly brush hers, “Dylan…uh…” she mumbled.

  “Ssshh!” I whispered into her mouth. “Let me love you Lex, let me love you and I will never let you down again,” I breathed into her mouth as our lips connected softly through my words. The slight touch of her lips on mine had my dick in overdrive again, but this wasn’t about sex. This was about proving that I cherished her and wanted her forever, even when we would be old and grey. I finally pulled away because my own self-control was weaning as she embraced me and placed her hands on my back.

  I stepped back an inch mesmerized by her. “I’ll pick you up later, we’re going to dinner,” I reminded her, then I went for my coat. Mission accomplished I rendered her speechless and thoroughly kissed by me.

  She didn’t move from the spot she was in. She placed her hand on the counter beside her, maybe for support, I hope my kiss affected her as much as it affected me.

  “Okay,” she whispered.

  Chapter 18

  Relief or Panic?

  Lexi

  Dylan walked out the door leaving me breathless, my body suddenly felt alive under his loving touch and I desperately wanted to embrace the feeling and never allow it to end. He is definitely the love of my life too. My need to protect my heart was breaking down because what I felt for him was more intense than anything I had ever known.

  “Hey Lex, is he gone?” Anna asked peeking her head out of her room. Her voice pulled me out of my Dylan induced daze, but it didn’t stop the need building in between my thighs. Only one thing will end that need and that was having Dylan buried deep inside me.

  “Yeah, sorry I didn’t mean to keep you in your room,” I replied trying to get my wits about me.

  “You didn’t. I know you guys have a lot to talk about so I didn’t want to interrupt. I’m home for the day anyway. I have to get school work done and I have a shift at Mickey’s tonight,” she said, walking over to the fridge and opening it.

  “Shit! Anna, what has Mickey been doing without me?” I asked feeling completely irresponsible that I forgot about my job. How could I forget about my job? I was running out of money.

  “No worries, Lex, Josie has been tending bar, she’s not as fast as you, but we’re managing. Don’t worry about work, I’m more worried about how you’re dealing with things,” she said as she reached into the fridge, the pulled her head back out and in her hands were some berries and Greek yogurt. “Do you want some berries and yogurt?” she asked.

  “Yeah, sure thanks,” I smiled taking a seat on the bar stool. “I’m trying to find some normal in my life, everything got so crazy. I need to tell Dylan about the baby, it’s sitting heavy on me, making me nervous as hell,” I said leaning forward and placing my elbows on the counter. I felt so nervous about telling Dylan the truth about the baby, things had been going well between us, I don’t think I could handle a rejection from him.

  As I mentioned the baby, I noticed Anna pause and her eyes flicked up to the ceiling as if she was pondering something or guilty of something. “What is it Anna?” I asked with an accusing tone. I knew her like the back of my own hand and I could tell she was hiding something.

  “Shit, Bandita… I need to tell you something, but maybe you should sit first,” she said clearly flustered. I looked down to the bar stool I was already seated on.

  “Anna I’m seated, what the hell is going on?” She was scaring me, she wasn’t the type to fluster. “What is it Anna? You’re making me nervous,” I repeated. She looked up to me with her bright emerald eyes, and my stomach began to turn. “Anna,” I snapped, trying to get her out of her bubble. She remained quiet and my frustration grew. She never had a problem telling me what was on her mind. There were only a handful of things she wasn’t able to discuss and it had to do with her childhood. “Geez! Anna just say it,” I demanded. How bad could this be?

  “He knows, Bandita,” she said lamenting. My color drained from my face and my heart skipped a beat. This wasn’t happening.

  “What do you mean?” I said looking over to Anna completely bewildered.

  “He knows everything. He had access to your file at the hospital. He was there when we arrived by ambulance. He isn’t stupid Lex, I could tell he made the calculations that you were four months pregnant. And the day you woke up in ICU and he had to tell you about the baby, the way it tore him up…. he was grieving too honey, you were too doped up on meds to see it, but he was broken and it killed him to break the news to you. You fell apart, but he fell apart too.”

  Everything Anna’s saying was too much. He’d known for the past few weeks and hadn’t said anything and he still wanted to be near me, he hadn’t run away? My heart hurts, I was overwhelmed and confused. I was sure that once he found out he would run, but he was still here and he was being more than kind. My heart rate accelerated, but it was not from nerves. I was excited and terrified to let myself feel. Suppressing my feelings for that man had become a habit that was hard to break. I was a mess.

  “I’m sorry Lex, he was torn up over everything, I didn’t want him blaming you. I told him about Luc abusing you, and confirmed that the baby was his,” she admits regrettably, but I could see that she felt that she was doing the right thing in that moment.

  “Anna.” I inhaled a large intake of air winding myself.

  “I know it wasn’t my place, but that guy loves you and you guys need to be together, it was my way of helping things along. I hope you aren’t mad,” she said with droopy eyes and a frown.

  Mad? I was completely floored. I didn’t know what to think. “Lex, relax,” Anna urged. That didn’t seem possible. “He’s still here and he still wants you and I accidentally overheard what he just said to you and honestly I’ve never heard anything more romantic in my life. I wish I was you,” she giggled placing a hand on my arm. I knew she was right, but I was too overwhelmed to answer.

  “Please don’t be mad at me, my intentions came from a good place and Dylan wasn’t mad. I think he was disappointed in himself that he wasn’t there for you,” she whispered. My eyes began to swell and the first tear made its way down my left cheek.

  “It’s okay you don
’t need to talk. Do me a favor and stop pushing that guy out of your life. He’s one of the few good ones. He clearly adores you,” she said and then she returned to the kitchen counter to continue making her yogurt and berries.

  I suddenly remembered that Dylan said he was coming back later. For a full hour I sat staring at the clock on the microwave in the kitchen trying to figure out what to say to him. He knew my worst fear and he hadn’t gone running, I didn’t know how to face him. I wish I could have an emergency session with Dr. Newman so he could provide some guidance because I was lost and I didn’t want to mess up the best thing that had ever happened to me. I made that mistake in the past. It wasn’t a mistake I wanted to repeat.

  I sat and waited.

  Chapter 19

  The Date

  Dylan

  It was finally Sunday evening, date night, the night of truths. As I stood nervously at her front door at seven o’clock I knocked on the door hoping she would be as happy to see me as I was to see her. She opened the door and her eyes instantly met mine, it was as if an electric shock had reverberated through my body making my dick hard. Her golden curls looked perfect and fresh, her lips were puckered and shiny and the black tight sweater she wore did wonders to show off her ample chest. Despite her hot looks I was drawn to something deeper. The meaningful way she looked at me, those dark blue eyes cared for me, even though she was not willing to admit the extent of it.

  She didn’t look like a woman that was severely beaten a month ago. Except for a small scar under her right eye. It hurt me to see the scar and its location was daunting. It reminded me of the night her mom beat her and split open the other side and I patched her up. I secretly fell in love with her that night. I didn’t know it was possible to completely love everything about a person until I met her.

  “Come in,” she said biting nervously on her lower lip. Hearing her voice sent a thrill of excitement through me. I knew she wouldn’t be running tonight.

  “Hey babe,” I said leaning in to give her a peck on the cheek. She flushed pink. It was good to see color had returned to her already pale skin. Before we got together in high school I only called her Lex, but once we got together I started calling her babe, and I liked the little pink flush that would erupt on her cheeks letting me know I affected her as much as she affected me. I want to make her feel as comfortable as possible. I could tell by the way her arms were hugging her waist that she felt closed down or nervous, I’m not sure. Her eyes met mine and that familiar electricity was there. I had dressed casually in blue jeans and a black V-neck sweater, I wanted this night to be very laid back, no pressure.

  “You look beautiful,” I smiled softly knowing she wasn’t a big fan of compliments, but I wanted to boost her ego.

  “Thanks,” her lips curled up.

  Her eyes discreetly roamed my body, and I loved that she was checking me out.

  “You don’t look so bad yourself,” she shrugged surprising me with a flirtatious compliment.

  “Thanks babe,” I replied with a throaty chuckle. A little flirting never hurt anyone. I leaned in to place a kiss on her forehead and her eyes closed. It was a simple gesture that showed her feelings for me even though she wouldn’t outwardly express herself.

  “Shall we?” I asked extending my arm.

  “Yeah, give me a second,” she turned to get her jacket out of a closet by the door. There was a mix of snow and rain as we left her apartment. A wet chill ran through my body and I moved in closer to Lexi to guard her from the ferocious wind. We made our way down the stairs to my car parked out front. I hadn’t brought the car with me until tonight, it was an expensive fancy car and it cost way beyond my salary as a resident. I had some explaining of my own to do, and this was my way of opening the way for that conversation.

  I opened the front door to my car. “If you get tired let me know, I don’t want you pushing yourself too much,” I said nervously waiting to see what her response to my car would be. She was perceptive and I knew it, I was betting on it now. She would ask the question and I would come clean.

  “Okay,” she replied. “Nice car, glad you made that dream come true,” she said remembering my fascination with silver race cars when I was younger. I had a poster of a silver Porsche on my bedroom wall. Of course she would remember that.

  “Thanks, you remember that?” I smirked, looking out to the road. The streets were extra slippery and my car didn’t handle the best in snowy winter conditions.

  “Of course I do, I remember a lot of things,” she replied solemnly. She was perfect but the light she had in her eyes had burnt out and I had to figure out a way of turning it back on again. She never asked about how I got the car or how I could afford it. Of course she wouldn’t, that would be prying and she wasn’t that type of girl. It also looked as if something was weighing on her, maybe she was too distracted.

  “Well don’t get me wrong, I’m happy I was able to get the car I want, but cars aren’t the important thing in life, there’s still a major part of my life missing,” I replied referring to her in a way.

  “I don’t mean to be pushy here, but how can you afford such a fancy car on a resident’s salary?” My stomach dropped. There it was, the question and my opening to talk. I glanced her way nervously. This was not the time to have such a serious conversation. I was driving a car, I couldn’t even look her way.

  “It’s a long story, one that you will hear soon enough,” I responded like the coward that I had been for the last seven years. She shrugged her shoulders and continued to look out the window.

  About twenty minutes later we reached our destination, Bistros, a nice little bar restaurant that served wings and beer. We used to frequent this place with our friends back in high school, it was a fun place to hang out. I was a little surprised it was still around, but when I Googled best wings in Toronto, it came up. I was not surprised. It was always jam packed.

  We’d shared a lot of good memories here. I used to watch the hockey game with the guys while the girls would be chatting it up, drinking and having fun. The carefree days, it seemed like a lifetime ago. We strayed so far away from each other that it scared me how we let it come to this. Everything happened too fast, one minute we were in love and I was planning our ever after and the next she was pushing me away and I closed down.

  I looked over to her. “Hey, what’s with the pouty face? One minute you’re smiling, the next you look sad. What’s going on? We can go somewhere else if you like.”

  “No it’s perfect, it just brought back memories seeing the place is all,” she replied looking a little emotional. She took a few deep breathes and I wish there was something I could do to ease her worries.

  “Exactly, I thought we had good memories here.” My lip tugged down on one side.

  “We do, it just made me realize how much has happened since, but I’m fine. Let’s go in,” she grinned.

  “I know what you mean, I was just thinking the same thing. We strayed far Lex. I never want that to happen again,” I said looking meaningfully into her eyes. Her hand was settled on her lap and I placed my hand over hers and gave it a little squeeze. Her blue eyes went round instantly and gazed up to mine. I lifted her hand and placed a soft kiss on her supple skin. The touch of her skin to my lips caused my eyes to close and I reveled in the feeling. When I slowly open my eyes I could tell that she was breathless. I wanted to reach over and claim her lips, it looked like it was what she wanted, but I had to come clean about my secrets first, it was only fair to her. If I kept kissing her I knew it wouldn’t be long before more was happening.

  I held the front door open and gave her my arm for support. The place hadn’t changed much, it had the same rustic sports bar aura going on. I called in advance and held a table for us, our usual table. The owner probably thought I was crazy making a reservation because it was not the type of establishment that took reservations. They used to serve us beer knowing we were under age.

  “This is really sweet, you didn’t have to go t
hrough the trouble, any table would be fine,” she said with a small smile, it was only a half grin, but I was glad to see that I’d brightened her mood a little bit.

  “I kind of feel like I need to make a lot of things up to you, we haven’t been out together since our coffee shop rendezvous…” I quirked up an eyebrow. “I want every minute we have together to count. I have some explaining to do,” I said moving in closer and leaning toward her. I was trying to be cautious, I didn’t want to overwhelm her, but I also didn’t want people listening in on our conversation. I was ready to come clean. I had to explain what kept me away from her the last seven years. It was the greatest mistake of my life not coming back and I knew that I abandoned her and lost her trust in the process.

  “I have something to say and it’s not easy,” she replied, interrupting my train of thought. I could tell by the pale look on her face that it was something serious enough to distract her from hearing me out.

  “It’s okay Lex, I can take whatever it is, I’ll always be here for you. I know I’ve done a shitty job in the past, but I plan on making things up to you,” I said, hoping to encourage and relax her.

  She inhaled a deep breath, she was so damn cute even when she was nervous. She bit on her lower lip. “You might not feel that way after you hear what I have to say.”

  “Just please trust me Lex,” I said offering a pleading look. She was making me nervous that she was working herself up. She got me curious on the one hand and relieved on the other that my own confession could wait.

  “The day we met at the coffee shop, I never expected to sleep with you,” she began to say as she stared at me with questioning eyes. I looked down to my hands and a little smile erupted on my lips because I would never regret that day. Even though things didn’t go as planned I waited a long time to have that connection with her.