Hold On to Hope

by Jean Fullerton

  Kate told her about the events of the previous night. ‘How much was there?’ Mattie asked.

  ‘Hundreds of pounds’ worth the sergeant said, but they won’t know until they’ve done a full inventory.’ Kate covered her eyes with her hand. ‘Oh, Mattie, if the police had discovered the stash themselves, Pat and I would have been answering questions at the Old Bailey for handling stolen goods.’

  ‘But I thought you kept the stable locked?’ Mattie asked.

  ‘He took the key from the cash drawer.’ Kate clenched her fists. ‘When I think of the danger he’s put us in, well . . . it makes my blood fair boil. I tell you, Mattie, if Freddie had been standing in front of me when I opened the stable door, I would have put him in his grave myself.’

  ‘You’ll have to wait your turn behind Pat and me,’ Mattie replied.

  Kate gave the best smile she could muster with a fat lip. ‘What would I do without you both?’

  Mattie patted her sister’s hand. ‘You’ll never have to. Now have some of your egg and drink your tea.’

  Kate finished her egg and then laid her head back on the cushion Mattie had placed there and closed her eyes. Mattie sat down quietly and studied her sleeping sister, bruised and battered. She crossed herself and pleaded with the Virgin that this would be the very last time Freddie’s fists would find their mark on Kate’s beautiful face.

  *

  Jonathan was chewing the end of his pen as he reread the weekly school’s report when a knock on the door roused him from his task.

  ‘Enter.’

  Miss Wainwright opened the door and ushered Ella into the room. ‘I’m sorry to disturb you, Headmaster, but Miss Ellis has been beside herself all morning and I can’t seem to get to the bottom of it. I thought perhaps you might . . .’

  ‘Of course,’ Jonathan replied, standing up and coming around the desk. ‘Come now, Ella, this is not like you,’ he said in a friendly voice. ‘You’re normally one of St Katharine’s jolliest pupils. What is all this crying about?’

  Ella looked up at him and Jonathan saw the echo of Kate in the young girl’s bruised face.

  ‘It’s . . . It’s . . .’ Her chin started to wobble uncontrollably and she covered her face with her hands.

  Jonathan looked over her head. ‘Thank you, Miss Wainwright, I’ll deal with this. You continue with your class.’

  The schoolmistress left.

  Jonathan placed his hand lightly on Ella’s shoulder and led her to the chair. ‘Come and sit here,’ he said, pulling up another chair beside her.

  She took out her handkerchief from her pocket and blew her nose.

  ‘Are you unwell at all, Ella?’

  She shook her head.

  ‘Has someone been bullying you?’

  She shook her head again.

  Jonathan ran his fingers through his hair. ‘Are you having trouble with—’

  ‘It’s my ma,’ she said, as tears spilled over again.

  ‘What wrong with your ma?’ he asked, suddenly alarmed.

  ‘Last night Pa came home.’ Ella recounted the tale. ‘. . . and then Joe and I ran all the way to Uncle Pat’s. When I told him what had happened, he and Mickey ran back to the shop. Aunt Josie wanted me and Joe to stay with her but I was afraid that Ma might be hurt so Rob walked us back. When I got there the police were already in the stable with Uncle Pat but when I saw what he’d done to Ma . . .’ She blew her nose. ‘Her face is swollen and she can’t chew,’ Ella went on. ‘Uncle Pat got the doctor from Chapman Street to see her and he said there were no bones broken and that she’d be all right in a day or two but . . .’ She clutched her hands. ‘Oh, Headmaster, I was so afraid Pa had killed her that when I saw she was alive, I just started crying and I can’t seem to stop.’

  Jonathan patted her shoulder lightly. ‘Don’t worry, Ella, it’s just shock. I’ve seen grown men crumple after witnessing such terrible things. It’s perfectly normal and you’ll soon be yourself again.’

  Ella looked up at him with a strangely grown-up expression on her young face. ‘I don’t care what the Sunday school teacher says about honouring your father and mother, I hate him.’ She clasped her hands together. ‘Why couldn’t he have stayed away?’ she sobbed. ‘All he does is take Ma’s money and hit her.’

  ‘Now, now . . .’

  ‘I wish you’d been there.’

  ‘So do I,’ he said, gently. ‘Would you like to collect your brother and go home?’

  ‘Yes, sir.’ Ella blew her nose again. ‘Thank you, Headmaster.’

  When she’d gone, Jonathan strode to the window and blindly looked into the empty schoolyard. He slammed his hand against the window frame, nearly shattering the glass. He turned, snatched his hat from the stand then tore open his office door and marched out.

  Kate sat back in the chair and watched as Mattie folded the last of the washing into a neat pile on the table.

  ‘Thank you for doing all that,’ she mumbled through her swollen lip.

  ‘I had to do something while you were snoozing.’ Mattie straightened the blanket over Kate’s legs again. ‘Is your headache easing?’

  ‘A little.’

  In truth, what with weeks of broken sleep and the drama of the night before, Kate had been dozing in and out of sleep all day.

  Mattie placed her hand on her forehead. ‘Well, there’s no fever. But don’t forget to take another dose of the medicine Doctor Ives left you.’

  ‘Do you think Sally will be able to cope with the supper rush?’ Kate asked, looking at the closed door that led to the shop.

  Mattie nodded. ‘Your old neighbour Peggy and a couple of others dropped by while you were asleep to see if they could help.’

  ‘What time did the police leave?’ Kate asked, shifting in her seat to ease the throbbing in her hip where Freddie’s boot had landed.

  ‘About midday,’ Mattie said. ‘And they are as keen as mustard to have a word with Freddie about it all. So that should stop him slipping back to bother you again.’

  The back door opened and Ella and Joe came in. They ran over to her and Kate did her best to hug them.

  ‘You’re home early,’ Kate said, trying to give a sunny smile.

  Ella took her hand. ‘I couldn’t stop crying so Miss Wainwright took me to the headmaster. I . . . I told him what happened and he sent us home.’

  ‘That’s kind of him,’ Kate said, looking up at Mattie.

  ‘Well, now you’ve seen your ma’s all right, what about coming back to my house for supper to let her have another few hours’ rest?’ Mattie said, as Joe and Ella started to unbutton their coats.

  The children didn’t seem so keen.

  Mattie slipped her arms around the children’s shoulders. ‘It only for a couple of hours and Uncle Nathaniel can bring you back on one of the wagons.’ They still looked unsure. ‘There’s jam pudding for afters, Joe, and you can help me bath Grace, Ella.’

  ‘But what if he comes back?’ Ella asked.

  ‘He won’t,’ replied Mattie. ‘Not with the streets crawling with coppers and your uncle Pat after his blood.’

  Ella hesitated for a moment longer and then nodded.

  Mattie kissed Kate on the head. ‘You rest up and I’ll see you tomorrow.’ Her eyes flickered over Kate’s bruised face. ‘Come on, you two, give your ma a kiss, gently,’ she said, looking pointedly at Joe, ‘and let’s get back.’

  Kate settled down when they’d gone and must have dropped off to sleep again as a light knock on the door woke her. She opened her eyes to see Sally ushering Jonathan through from the shop.

  He stopped dead with a look of horror on his face. ‘My God!’ The brim of his hat buckled in his grip as his expression turned from shock to fury. ‘Ella told me you were injured but I . . .’

  Sally shut the door.

  ‘Jonathan,’ Kate whispered, as tears began to slip down her cheeks.

  He threw his hat aside and knelt down beside her. Slipping his arm around her he carefully cradled her in his
arms. ‘My darling.’

  She rested her head on his shoulder and closed her eyes. ‘I didn’t want you to see me li—’

  His lips touched hers gently, stopping her words.

  ‘Shhh, sweetheart. What did the doctor say? Are there any broken bones? Who is looking after you?’

  ‘Once the bruising has subsided, I’ll be as good as new,’ she replied. ‘My sister, Mattie, will be dropping by each day to make sure I’m all right. You’ve just missed her.’

  ‘And the children?’

  Tears welled up in her eyes. ‘Oh, Jonathan, I . . . I . . .’

  He gathered her into his arms again and held her as she wept quietly.

  ‘Tell me where I can find him,’ he said in a controlled voice, once she’d stopped crying.

  Kate froze. ‘What are you going to do?’

  ‘Find him, of course.’ Jonathan started to rise. ‘If the brute thinks he can—’

  ‘You mustn’t.’ Kate clung to him. ‘He’s probably hiding in the Spitalfields rookery and even the police don’t venture in there unless a dozen go together.’

  ‘I damn well can and I will.’

  ‘But if you do anything, then he and everyone else will know about us.’

  Jonathan clenched his fist. ‘When I get my hands on him, I’ll . . .’ He looked at her for a moment then returned to her side. ‘Us?’

  Kate nodded.

  He returned to her side and gathered her gently into his arms. ‘Oh, Kate,’ he said, as his lips lightly pressed onto hers. ‘I love you.’

  Kate rested her head on his chest. ‘And I you but what are we to do?’

  ‘We have to go away as far as possible,’ he said, kissing her forehead. ‘To Australia.’

  ‘Is there no other way?’ she asked, already knowing the answer – she wasn’t rich enough to hire lawyers for a divorce and anyway, in Knockfergus you were married for life.

  ‘Kate, I understand what I’m asking you to do but we can be Mr and Mrs Quinn with no one to say otherwise there. Ella and Joe can grow up in a country with endless possibilities. And it would be the same for our children, too, Kate.’

  But what a scandal! thought Kate. A wife throwing aside respectability and absconding with the schoolmaster. She would be the talk of the neighbourhood for years to come. And what of Jonathan? He would be labelled a scoundrel and blackguard. And then there was Ella and Joe – would they thrive in this faraway land? And what about Patrick, Mattie, her ma and the rest of the family? How could she possibly leave everyone she loved behind? Her gaze moved slowly over his face, taking in its details. She reached up and released a strand of hair sitting over his eyepatch.

  ‘When can we go?’

  He grasped her hand and pressed it to his lips. ‘We should leave before the end of September to avoid the Atlantic storms.’

  Panic fluttered in Kate’s chest. It was mid-August now so they would be leaving in just six weeks.

  ‘So soon?’

  Jonathan kissed her hand again. ‘The sooner I get you out of reach of that brute, the better. Just get well and leave the arrangements to me.’

  ‘I understand but, Jonathan, the person who wrote that letter to the guardians is still watching us and might find out our plan,’ Kate said.

  Jonathan raked his fingers through his hair. ‘We will need to be extra careful to act completely normal. We must be safely on the ship in the middle of the Atlantic before anyone realises we’ve gone. I promise you’ll never regret it, Kate.’

  Kate pushed aside the knot of unhappiness about her family and smiled up at him. ‘If we’re together, Jonathan, I know I never will.’

  ‘There you go, Polly,’ Kate said, handing over two bowls of mutton and dumplings. ‘I’ve put an extra couple of potatoes in your lads’ bowls as I know the young ’uns have hollow legs.’

  ‘Thank you, Mrs E,’ Polly replied. ‘What do you say, boys?’

  ‘Fank you, Mssss E,’ said the two lads, clinging to their mother’s skirt.

  Kate stepped through the gap in the counter and bent down so her face was level with theirs. ‘That’s all right but mind you eat it all up,’ she said, handing them a spoon each, ‘because if you do, I might just have a bit of custard for you both.’

  The youngsters’ eyes lit up. Kate stood up as their mother led them to the back of the shop. The doorbell tinkled. Kate looked around and saw Miss Puttock squeezing her immensely wide skirts through the door. She was surprised to see her as she’d never been to the shop before.

  ‘Good day, Miss Puttock,’ said Kate, wiping her hands and walking over to greet her.

  ‘Mrs Ellis,’ Miss Puttock replied, trying to negotiate her way through the tightly packed tables and chairs without knocking the furniture over.

  ‘I confess I am a little surprised to see you here,’ Kate said, as the young woman stopped in front of her.

  Miss Puttock looked around disdainfully. ‘No more than I am to be here, I assure you.’

  A navvy pushed past, forcing her to step closer to the counter. The back of her skirt rose up and knocked a mug of tea off the table behind. A whoop went up from the men in the shop and Miss Puttock’s tightly drawn lips pulled in further.

  ‘Is there somewhere we could talk privately?’ she asked, looking condescendingly at Kate.

  ‘Of course,’ Kate replied. ‘Come through to the parlour.’

  Miss Puttock side-stepped between the open part of the counter and swept into Kate’s back room.

  Sally put a handful of bowls on the worktop. ‘We must be going up in the world if Lady Muck’s dropping in for afternoon tea,’ she hissed.

  ‘That will be the day,’ Kate replied, before she followed Miss Puttock. Quickly she untied her apron and tucked a stray curl of hair behind her ear. Miss Puttock was standing with her hands clasped in front of her and a resolute expression on her face.

  ‘Please, take a seat.’ Kate indicated the chair by the fire.

  Miss Puttock pulled out a straight-backed chair from the table and perched on the edge.

  ‘Would you like a cup of tea?’

  ‘Thank you, no. This isn’t a social call.’

  Kate pulled out another chair from the table and sat down. ‘If it’s about Joe’s behaviour at Sunday school, I can only—’

  ‘It’s not your son’s conduct I have come to discuss, Mrs Ellis.’ She glared at Kate. ‘Perhaps I should come straight to the point. I know about you and Captain Quinn.’

  Kate’s heart lurched. ‘What about Captain Quinn and me?’ she asked, praying only she could hear the tremor in her voice.

  ‘About your sordid liaison,’ Miss Puttock replied, her face contorted with venom.

  ‘I . . . I don’t know what you are talking about,’ Kate stuttered, feeling her cheeks grow warm.

  ‘Don’t try to play the innocent with me. I overheard you talking in the graveyard.’

  ‘It was you who sent the letter to the school guardians.’

  Miss Puttock’s neck flushed a deep crimson. ‘I don’t know to what you are referring. I was merely strolling in the graveyard contemplating Mr Overton’s fine sermon when I spotted the two of you together and—’

  ‘Sneaked behind the monument and spied on us.’

  ‘I did no such thing.’ Miss Puttock’s gaze shifted. ‘But I couldn’t help but hear your shameful conversation.’

  ‘Then you no doubt heard me turn him away,’ Kate replied, as the memory of Jonathan’s agonised expression cut her heart again.

  Miss Puttock gave a mirthless laugh. ‘You may have feigned reluctance but only to enflame his emotions and entangle him further.’ Her gaze ran slowly over Kate. ‘After all, that’s how you caught Freddie Ellis, wasn’t it?’ She straightened an imaginary crease on her skirt. ‘Of course, I do not blame Captain Quinn. Even godly, righteous men are still men and their fallen natures make them susceptible to the lures of women like you. But the Lord tells us to forgive the transgressions of others and I shall most willingly pardon Capta
in Quinn. However,’ her eyes narrowed, ‘if he refuses to see the error of his ways, I’m afraid it would be my duty to inform the school guardians of this deplorable situation. Do you understand?’

  Kate studied her hands resting in her lap and counted backwards slowly from ten. She raised her head. ‘Yes.’

  Miss Puttock scrutinised her closely. ‘I’m relieved to hear that.’ She stood up. ‘It would be a pity if Captain Quinn were to throw away his position and blight his good name with a woman like you.’

  Kate stood up and looked her squarely in the eye. ‘Have you finished?’

  ‘I think so,’ Miss Puttock replied, pulling on her gloves.

  ‘Good.’ Kate crossed the room and flung open the parlour door. ‘Don’t let me detain you.’

  With an indignant toss of her head, Mabel stormed across the room to the door. As she came level with Kate, she paused.

  ‘You may have hoodwinked the guardians, Mrs Ellis, but you don’t fool me. I shall be watching you very closely indeed and if I hear Captain Quinn’s name even whispered in the same sentence as yours, I will destroy his good name. Do you understand?’

  ‘I do,’ Kate replied, fighting the urge to slap the smug, condescending expression off the young woman’s face.

  Miss Puttock smiled sweetly. ‘I’m glad you do. After all, we can’t have a man in charge of the moral welfare of our dear children embroiled in an adulterous relationship, can we?’

  She swept out. Kate stood there for a moment to regain her composure before walking back into the shop.

  Sally was up to her elbows in suds, washing plates, but looked around as Kate appeared. ‘By the look on her face when she stormed through, I’d say you won the battle with dragon Puttock good and proper.’

  Kate forced a smile. She wished it were so but she had the feeling that unlike St George’s defeated dragon, Miss Puttock would rise up and finish them both.

  Chapter Twenty-Five

  Kate straightened the curtains and looked out at the leaden sky. A few heavy raindrops had begun to patter down and it looked as if there were more to follow. She glanced anxiously along the street but there was no sign of Jonathan. She put her hand on her forehead to ease her throbbing headache. Although she’d recovered completely from Freddie’s brutal attack, two sleepless nights thinking about Miss Puttock’s visit had left her mind battered and bruised.