Just Jenny

by Sandra Owens

  I guess I took too long to answer because he captured my hand. “We’ll walk. Easier than moving our cars.”

  Five minutes later we were seated at a corner table, an iced coffee in front of me, a hot coffee for Dylan. He’d held my hand all the way over, which confused me. Holding hands had always felt like an intimate act between a man and a woman. Why was he touching me? I wished he’d just go away. Being with him again, even if only to talk, was messing with my head.

  My hungry gaze roamed over him. The man was mouthwateringly sexy wearing his cop uniform—beige cargo pants, a dark brown Henley shirt, a brown leather bomber jacket, and the gun holster on his hip.

  Handsome, dangerous, and not mine.

  40

  ~ Dylan ~

  What was I about? It was obvious Jenny was uncomfortable, but leaving me with nothing but a note hadn’t set well. Yeah, I knew her plans and why she had to go, but there was more to it than that. I’d thought long and hard about it, and the only thing I could come up with for her sneaking out the way she had was that her feelings for me scared her. I could understand that. What I felt for her for sure scared me.

  Maybe it wasn’t fair to push her to admit there was more between us than friends with benefits, but I needed to know. If she’d only ask me, I’d wait for her however long it took to get the travel bug out of her system, to keep the promise she’d made to her sister. I’d always been a one-woman man, and Jenny was the woman I wanted. If that meant waiting for her, so be it.

  “I wasn’t expecting to run into you at the hospital.” Yeah, I was stalling, not sure what to say.

  She stirred the whipped cream into her iced coffee. “How’s Sean?”

  “Getting better every day. He’ll have months of physical therapy ahead, but he’ll be okay.”

  “It was nice of you to visit him.”

  She still wasn’t looking at me, which bugged the hell out of me. “Actually I came to see his parents to let them know that we charged Stephanie with a DUI.” That got her attention, and she lifted her eyes to mine. I could drown in those damn green eyes.

  “I can’t say I’m surprised, but maybe it will be a wake-up call.”

  “Her father hopes so.” Her gaze returned to her coffee, which she’d barely touched. I still didn’t know what I wanted to say, but I better spit something out because she was on the edge of her seat, ready to bolt.

  “How have you been, Jenny?”

  “Peachy. I’ve been just peachy.”

  I frowned. What had I done? She was the one who left me a fucking note. “I’m clueless here, Red. Couldn’t you have talked to me instead of leaving a note?” I hadn’t meant to say that, but now that it was out, I let the question hang in the air.

  “Obviously, that was fine with you since you haven’t once tried to call me.”

  Now it was my fault? I studied her face, saw the confusion and regret swirling in her eyes and realized that she had an internal battle going on. She did feel something for me, and as for me, I wanted her more than my next breath.

  “Ask me to stay, Dylan,” she said, her gaze on the straw she poked around in her iced coffee.

  I almost did. But how long would it be before she resented me for not only stealing her dream but for forcing her to break a deathbed promise? I did the only thing I could for her. “No, I won’t do that, even though I’m tempted. If you don’t go, you’ll regret it. Then there’s the promise you made to your sister. You have to go, but I’m not telling you anything you don’t already know.”

  “You’re not.” Her shoulders slumped. “Truthfully I didn’t mean to say that.”

  By all appearances, she was having second thoughts, and I had the feeling it would be easy to talk her out of it, which I think she wanted me to do. It wasn’t my decision to make. She had to choose between me and a deathbed promise.

  “Do you need a ride to the airport?” I hoped she said no. The last thing I wanted to do was watch her get on a plane.

  “No, my parents are taking me.” She stood.

  “Can I have a good-bye hug?” She walked into my arms when I held them out, and Christ, I didn’t want to ever let her go. At hearing her sniffle, I put my hand on the back of her neck, closing my eyes as I leaned my chin on her head.

  “Hush, Jenny Girl,” I said, stroking her hair when a sob broke free from her. “This time next month, you’ll be standing on a warm beach somewhere while the rest of us here are cursing the snow. Just be smart and careful, okay?” The world was a scary place these days, and I clamped down on my protective instincts before I begged her not to take off for foreign places by herself.

  “I will.” She slipped out of my arms and turned to leave, but not before I saw the tears streaming down her cheeks. “Tell Daisy I’ll really miss her.”

  If I wasn’t mistaken, that message was meant for me. I watched her walk away, the ache in my heart growing with each step she took.

  “Good-bye, Jenny Girl,” I whispered.

  Christine’s ghost returned.

  “Hello, Dy.”

  I groaned at hearing the voice in my mind. “I thought you were gone for good.” I pulled my pillow over my head, but she was still there.

  “I thought so, too, but I came back to help you. Why are you letting her slip through your fingers?”

  So now my dead wife was giving me love advice? Weird. “Now you sound like Garrett. Are you talking to him, too?”

  She laughed. “Maybe I’m channeling him.”

  Oh, joy. Both of them in my head at once? “Get out of my mind, Christine. I’m not going to talk to you about Jenny.”

  “You’re a fool for letting her go, Dylan.”

  That was probably true. I struggled up from sleep, annoyed that when troubled, my mind was still conjuring up my wife’s voice. It had been a long day. Wary of my mood after I’d returned from the hospital, my officers had kept their heads down. Even Daisy had anxiously followed my every move, her worried eyes never leaving me.

  “Stop watching me,” I snapped at seeing her sitting a few feet from my bed. When she whined and hung her head, I sighed. “I’m sorry, girl. It’s just that I’m having a hard time right now. Nothing you did.”

  That seemed to placate her. She barked in answer, then returned to her bed. An hour later I gave up trying to go back to sleep. Was I making a mistake letting Jenny go? She’d all but said she’d stay if I asked. I didn’t know the right answer. My hesitation was because I couldn’t get past one thing. If she loved me, I wouldn’t have to ask her to stay. If she loved me, I would be more important than the dreams of two young girls. So I wouldn’t ask, and she wouldn’t stay. End of story.

  The week before the wedding I spent the days getting my station in order. To keep my mind off Jenny, I was in my office early and still there late. I rode with each of my uniformed officers, observing how they handled calls, and then discussing ways they could improve. They seemed to appreciate it. Doing evaluation rides had been a part of Moody’s job description, but I’d learned he’d never once ridden with any of them.

  Sarah was promoted to captain, and Kim was just as excited to be promoted to junior detective status.

  There was an air of pride in their department from my officers these days that had been missing when I’d arrived on the job. Their new uniforms had arrived this morning, and they hadn’t wasted any time changing out of the puky-green ones. Dressed in the black cargo pants and dark blue Henleys, even their posture was straighter.

  “Do I look badass?” Tommy asked from the doorway of my office.

  I let my gaze travel over him. “Do you even have to ask?” He was getting ready to go out on the late shift, and like the morning people, as soon as he saw his new uniform, he’d headed for the locker room to change.

  “Just making sure my eyes weren’t lying.” A big grin crossed his face. “I never thought we’d get cool uniforms. As far as all of us are concerned, you’re a rock star, Chief.”

  With that, he walked away. I stared at t
he empty doorway as a strange combination of contentment and a sense of loss enveloped me. I’d known when I accepted the position as chief of police that I would do a good job. I’d come here expecting to do just that, although I’d thought it might take longer to win my officers’ loyalty. What I realized now was that they had been desperate for guidance and discipline. That I’d been able to give them what they needed was thanks in large part to Garrett and how he trained and treated his cops.

  Picking my phone up from my desk, I put my finger on his name in my contact list to give him a call.

  “If you ask nicely, I’ll give you your job back,” he said in greeting.

  “Demote myself from chief to detective? I don’t think so.”

  “Then why are you calling me, other than because you love me?”

  “That I do.” I leaned back in my chair. “I’m calling because I decided it was time to thank you. Something I should have done long ago.”

  “For what?”

  His gravelly voice would always be one of my favorite sounds. “For making me the cop I am today. Not to get mushy on you, but I was thinking about that just now, how you took a green kid and made him into something he could be proud of.”

  “Fuck, Dylan, you’re gonna make me cry.”

  I smiled at my phone. “When’s Derrick going to get you to clean up that foul mouth of yours?”

  “The man loves my foul mouth.”

  “So not going there.” At his laugh I swiveled my chair, gazing out the window, thinking of the last time I’d seen him. To my shame, I’d not once thought of Jack since Garrett had hauled him away. “How’s Jack doing?”

  “I pulled in some favors and got him into a special treatment center. He’ll never be a cop again, but if he sticks with it and once his therapist signs off on his mental state, I’ve arranged an interview with a PI friend.”

  Jack as a PI? “I’m sorry it came to that.”

  “You’re not to blame, son. We each choose what road to travel. He just took a wrong turn is all, but he’ll get back on track. How’s that sexy woman of yours?”

  “Leaving Sunday morning for her world tour.”

  “You’re smart in a lot of ways, Dylan, but in some you’re a dumbass tool. If it were Derrick trying to leave me, I’d move mountains to keep him. Think about that while you’re crying in your beer.”

  He hung up on me. I set my phone back on the desk. Derrick wasn’t Jenny. He hadn’t made a deathbed promise to his twin. It wasn’t the same thing. And Derrick would never think of leaving Garrett because he loved that man without question. I didn’t have that from Jenny.

  41

  ~ Jenny ~

  Autumn and I were so frustrated. Jackson, Savannah’s boyfriend, had been glued to her side since they’d arrived two days ago for the rehearsal dinner. He’d even refused to let her attend Autumn’s bachelorette party. He was also her manager, and apparently he was controlling one hundred percent of her life.

  We were at Autumn’s house, the one she would officially start living in with Brian tonight. We had four hours before the limos arrived to take us to the church, and we were both excited that we’d finally get to spend some alone time with Savannah.

  “I guess we should consider ourselves lucky Jackson’s letting her out of his sight long enough to get dressed with us,” Autumn said as we waited for Savannah to arrive. “Why does she let him boss her around like that?”

  “If you think about it, her mother’s always been the driving force in Savannah’s life. It’s like she’s been trained to be obedient to an authoritarian figure.” I pulled the plastic off my dress.

  “Well, that’s just sad. The only time I can remember seeing her really happy was the year she was with Adam.”

  “Yeah, they were honest to God in love. Hopefully she’ll confide in us when she gets here.” I held my dress against me and looked in the mirror. Autumn was having a Christmas themed wedding. Mine and Savannah’s dresses were an emerald green, and we would be carrying red tulips. The dress was gorgeous.

  “I wish she’d come back alone so we could have spent more time with her,” Autumn said. “I don’t think—”

  The doorbell rang. “She’s here.” I opened the front door. Savannah stood on the other side with Jackson, and I caught the tail end of what he was saying to her. “…don’t talk about us.”

  “No men allowed,” I said, grabbing her arm and pulling her inside before I shut the door in his face. For good measure I turned the lock.

  Autumn and I smothered her in hugs. When I pulled away, her eyes were brimming with tears. Savannah Graham was a striking woman. Not classically beautiful like so many models, but her features were unique. Raven-black hair that fell halfway down her back and her gray eyes were the things you noticed first about her. In elementary school, the kids used to make fun of her, saying she had ghost eyes. They also called her beanpole.

  Her skin was creamy and flawless, and she was tall and at least fifteen pounds lighter than the last time I’d seen her. Personally I thought she was too thin. She was also extremely shy, which I blamed on her mother for doing her best to crush everything that was special about Savannah except her looks. Regina Graham, a former model herself and a force to be reckoned with, had grown up in the valley. When she’d gotten pregnant with Savannah, she’d moved back. She never told Savannah who her father is.

  It was only a guess on my part, but I think the pregnancy was an accident, and that Mrs. Graham resented Savannah a little for it. From the day Savannah was born, she’d been raised to be a famous model, and—another guess on my part—Mrs. Graham was living her glory days through Savannah. I wasn’t too fond of Savannah’s mother.

  “I miss you two so much,” Savannah said.

  Autumn narrowed her eyes. “Could have fooled us. You never call, never come back for a visit.”

  “Autumn,” I said, shaking my head at her. This wasn’t a day for us all to end up in accusations and tears.

  “I’m sorry,” Savannah said, her voice quivering.

  “Well, you’re here now, and that’s all that matters. Time to break out the champagne.” I was determined to spend what little time the three of us had together laughing the way we used to.

  I took Savannah’s hand and pulled her with me to the living room. Autumn and I had spread pillows around the coffee table, where we had a bottle of champagne chilling in an ice bucket. Plates of treats—chocolate-covered strawberries, iced tea cakes, thin slices of banana nut bread with cream cheese (Savannah’s favorite), and caviar on toast points—surrounded the ice bucket.

  “Here’s to besties, to love, and to happiness,” I said after filling the crystal champagne glasses. We clinked glasses.

  “To friendships that last forever,” Autumn said.

  Savannah smiled. “Especially to that.” She took a small sip of champagne, then set it aside.

  “By the way, you’re doing my makeup today,” Autumn said to Savannah. “I figure you know all the tricks to make me a beautiful bride.”

  “I do know a few, and I’d love to.”

  “Awesome. The plan for today is a few hours of girl time and then we’ll get dressed. Two limos will be here at five to take us to the church. My parents will be in one, and I’ll ride with them. You two will ride in the second one.”

  “Why isn’t your mother here?” Savannah asked.

  “Because my dad said he wanted to ride with her, so…” She shrugged.

  Savannah and I exchanged glances, both of us knowing that Autumn never came first with her mother, even on her wedding day. Autumn’s parents were a revolving door of on and off together. At the moment they were off. But that was another story, and I was selfishly glad it was just the three of us together.

  As Autumn and I ate, I noticed that Savannah wasn’t, but her eyes greedily followed each morsel we put in our mouths. I picked up a slice of the banana bread, put it on a napkin, and set it in front of her.

  She shook her head. “I’m not allowed…
I mean I’m not hungry.”

  Autumn’s gaze zeroed in on Savannah. “I call bullshit, Savannah Graham. You’re too skinny and you’re looking at this food like you haven’t had a decent meal in ages. Who doesn’t allow you to eat? Your mother? Jackson?”

  “I can’t…I mean I don’t want to talk about Jackson. Or my mother. Not today.”

  From what I’d heard Jackson say, she was under orders not to talk about him, but I didn’t tell Autumn that. It would only set Autumn off even more, and Savannah was obviously already close to losing it.

  I put my hand over Savannah’s. “Here’s the deal. Whatever’s going on in your life right now, we’re here for you if you want to talk. In the meantime, we haven’t seen you in over a year, and we’re going to have fun for a few hours like we used to. That means we’re going to drink champagne and eat these delicious treats, reminisce and laugh. What goes on in this room this afternoon, stays in this room. So today, eat to your heart’s content. Mine and Autumn’s lips are sealed. Okay?”

  Savannah’s gaze slid over the goodies on the table, and then she smiled as she looked from Autumn to me. “It’s marvelously okay.”

  “Thank God,” Autumn said. “I thought I was going to have to cram that banana bread down your throat.”

  “Remember when it was my sixteenth birthday and my mother gave me a bowl of fruit with a candle stuck in the middle?” Savannah grinned at Autumn. “You were so mad about that when I told you the next day.”

  I laughed. “Yeah, she got Mary to make a chocolate fudge cake piled high with icing. We hid in Connor and Adam’s tree house and ate the whole thing.”

  “It was so good,” Savannah said. “I think that was only the third time in my life that I’d had cake.”

  Autumn scowled. “That’s just wrong.”

  “Well, we’re going to make up for that today.” I refilled our champagne glasses, then put two of each treat in front of Savannah.