Besotted

by Madison Michael

  “Damn it, Ree, I am not breaking up with you.”

  Regan stood still, forming a small ‘O’ with her mouth, bright blue eyes huge in her face. “You’re not? But you said it was serious.” She was stunned.

  “It is. Just let me talk for a minute, would’ya?

  “Sorry, “ she apologized, talking his hand in hers again and pulling him closer. If he inhaled, his chest would be touching hers. She was so close and so happy. She wanted to get nearer, but she could see that he was trying to concentrate. “I’m listening, Tyler.”

  Stepping back, Tyler looked her in the face, took a deep breath and sputtered. "We both knew this day would come, Regan, when I had to leave for college, and you would stay here. But, I think we both assumed this thing between us would burn out before that and it would be no big deal. For me, at least, it’s is a huge deal."

  “Me too, Tyler. I am going to miss you so much.”

  Tyler nodded and continued. “I know that long-distance relationships don’t usually work, so I don’t want to leave things uncertain between us or leave anything left unspoken. You are a beautiful girl, Regan, and popular. I suspect you will make homecoming court next year…”

  “You are so sweet to say that,” she interrupted, flattered by his compliment.

  “Anyway, the minute I am out of the picture, guys are a gonna flock to you, and I will understand if you want to be free to date them, to play the field. You have only been with me, and you are young to make the kind of commitment I am asking."

  “You are asking for a commitment?” Regan felt her breath leave her body. Tyler had her complete attention.

  "Wyatt wants me to break up with you. In fact, he thinks that is what I am doing right now. He thinks you should be free to date other guys. He loves to remind me that you are just a sophomore.”

  “And he wants you to be free to hang around with him. He needs a – what do you guys call it again?”

  “A wingman,” Tyler supplied.

  “Yeah, a wingman.” Regan despised the idea of Tyler being her brother’s sidekick. Wyatt was always picking up girls, everywhere he went. She figured it was only a matter of time before Tyler succumbed to the wiles of one of them.

  "Maybe, if we are honest, he does want that, but mostly he wants us separated. He worries about you, and he thinks I am stupid to tie myself to a high-school girl. He doesn't understand that you are not just some girl to me."

  “He is always on my case too, about you being too old for me, but he just hates that his friend is dating his sister and he doesn’t get all the juicy details." Regan loved keeping what she and Tyler did together a secret, then rubbing Wyatt's nose in it, but she didn't share that with Tyler.

  Tyler had told Regan how much the secrecy bothered Wyatt along with cohorts, Alex Gaines, and Randall Parker. The four were inseparable and shared stories of their conquests every Monday. Not Tyler. "After all, Ree, what can I say in front of three protective boys all of whom feel like they are your brother?"

  Regan laughed when Tyler told her that, but she never failed to use it against Wyatt, teasing him with her secrets, making him think she and Tyler were doing more than they were.

  "Wyatt has been on my case all year about you. He hounds me with remarks about "making an ass of myself" or "sniffing around you." Just this morning, he started in on me again.

  “I heard some of it,” Regan confessed.

  “You did?”

  “’ ‘Fraid I was eavesdropping. Sorry about that. He didn’t mind when we were younger,” Regan reminded him, trying to get him to move past Wyatt’s objections. She knew he was swayed by his friend's opinions too much. "When you were pulling my pigtails, and I was sticking my tongue out at you, no one paid attention. But once I entered high school, things were different. Suddenly Wyatt was my overprotective big brother. And this year, my dad…”

  "They're no dummies, Ree. You're not a kid anymore, and they're afraid we'll get into trouble. Have you looked at yourself lately?”

  Regan knew she was more grown up but what was the big deal? “So I’m not skinny with pigtails anymore.”

  “You are clueless, Regan. You’ve blossomed into a stunner. All the boys have noticed. I sure have,” Tyler finished reaching for her and giving her a soft kiss on the lips.

  Regan lingered against him, savoring the sensation of his lips pressing hers, of his tongue exploring her mouth as the kiss became more demanding. Regan wrapped her arms low around Tyler’s back and pulled him close, feeling the bulge growing between them with wonder.

  Finally, he pulled back. Regan hid her disappointment by fidgeting, adjusting her sweater with a twitch. “Wyatt is just afraid you’ll hurt his reputation, Ty. It was never about me. You guys are the big deal seniors. He’s embarrassed you’re hanging around his kid sister.”

  “You may be right about that, but he is concerned about you too.”

  "I know, but he should trust you. Although," Regan continued, "my parents don’t seem to trust you as they used to either. That doesn't help.”

  They both knew why. Tyler had changed during the last year, changed enough that he stood out around conservative Lake Forest. Not in a good way. While his friends wore oxford shirts and Dockers, he had swapped them for a supple, buttery leather jacket and skin-tight jeans. His hair was longer than his friends, and now that school was about to end, he was growing a goatee. He looked like the consummate bad boy, despite his wholesome upbringing and salutatorian status. Wyatt was valedictorian, of course.

  The look was bad enough, but a scant two months ago, over the objections of his parents, Tyler had purchased a Harley Dyna Superglide, adding to his new image. It had changed him. Regan knew that late at night he was hanging around with a different crowd. He was edgy, but she found his bad boy persona sexy and appealing.

  Wyatt and his friends were unfazed by his new look. He still played sports and got high grades and was – well – Tyler. Only Regan knew that Tyler liked to sneak out to the beach to smoke a little weed with a group of bikers. He invited her to join him, but she always said no. It might have been her imagination, but she thought he was relieved, not wanting her to be part of this aspect of his life. It hurt a little, but when she was honest, she admitted that she was afraid of her own emotions, and her hormones, as well as worried about getting caught.

  She was too young for sex, although many of her friends were losing their virginity. She knew that Tyler longed to sink his body into hers. They could barely keep their hands off each other. No wonder her parents worried about her innocence. They realized what he was thinking, and could read him like a book.

  “They like me, but they like me better when I am far from you,” he acknowledged. “Far away. That’s why I wanted to talk to you, Ree.”

  Tyler was uncertain in a way she had never seen before. A confident young man raised with all he desired – wealth, family support, brains, and charm, it was uncharacteristic for him to be so reticent and nervous. "I'm going away," Tyler finally blurted out. "For the summer."

  “What do you mean, Ty? Are you taking a vacation?” She was confused. So what if he took a week or two and went away? It wasn’t surprising, even if it was unplanned.

  “No, Ree. I mean I am going away for the whole summer. I am leaving this weekend. Right after graduation.”

  "Where? For how long?" Regan was confused. Tyler was usually forthcoming, but he was offering her nothing.

  “My folks decided I should go with my brother, Denny, for the summer. We're going to backpack all over Europe." Tyler didn't sound at all excited, and he was kicking at the ground with his Nikes. Usually, this behavior meant Tyler was hiding something, but Europe with his brother was nothing to hide. Regan couldn’t help being excited for him.

  “That’s fantastic,” she gushed, giving him a huge hug. “You will have the best time. Why don’t you seem happy about it?”

  "It's just I'll be away from you all summer, and then I leave for college."

  Regan’s face f
ell. She hadn’t realized he would be gone that long. “All summer? Can you get out of some of it?” She felt like Tyler was breaking up with her after all. They wouldn’t see each other for months. Tears were building behind Regan’s eyes, threatening to spill over. She struggled to hide them from Tyler.

  “That’s why I needed to talk to you today.”

  Regan chewed on her bottom lip, a nervous habit. Tyler was staring at her mouth like he wanted to kiss her, but she just wanted to sob. “Tyler, I don’t like the feel of this.”

  “We’re fine, Ree,” he reassured her, taking her in his arms and holding her tightly. “We are better than fine. You know how I feel about you, right?” Regan felt his breath in her hair, his arms around her. Here was her Tyler. If he said they were fine, they were fine. “You have always been the only girl for me.”

  Regan was reassured by his words, smiling broadly despite their impending separation. Her smile faded with his next words.

  “Chicago and even Lake Forest have a lot to offer you. You have that summer internship to keep you busy. And Ree,” he hesitated and released her. She looked up into his serious face. Feeling her lip start to tremble, she bit down hard on it. She was going to lose it any second. “I get that you might find somebody new, somebody you like better than me.”

  Was he pushing her away and waiting for her to break up with him? "I won't, Tyler. I know I won't," she rushed the words in a breath as the sobs started.

  Tyler took her in his arms until she quieted, then held her at arm's length. “I won’t find someone else either, Regan. You are the girl for me. I need you to know that I will still want you, even when I am away at college. Will you wait for me too, Ree? Will you be my girl?”

  Regan couldn’t remember when Tyler had said so many words together in his life. He stopped holding his breath, eyes staring hard at her bottom lip.

  Regan beamed pleasure at his words, pink rising in her cheeks her wide eyes sparkling, tears gone. “I feel just the same, Tyler.”

  “I hate the idea of you being with some other guy, and I have absolutely no interest in being with any other girl. Promise you'll wait?"

  “I don’t know,” she said, suddenly feeling light and playful. Tyler wanted her. He had proclaimed it, out loud. “What will you be doing all those years, while I am being good and waiting for you?”

  “Me? I will be loving you, Regan. No matter where I am. No other girl is going to be special to me, Regan. It will always be you. Someday I am going to marry you.”

  “Marry me?” Regan stood dumbfounded. He loved her. He was talking about marriage. This discussion was miles from where she thought they would be when she started this conversation. She was bursting with happiness even though he was leaving for the summer.

  “Yep. I promise you right here, right now. Someday you will be Mrs. Tyler Winthrop." Tyler finally swooped in, gently taking her pouty lip between his teeth before swirling his tongue in her mouth, exploring the warmth there. She could feel him relax after his speech. He leaned into her, their bodies touching from lips to thighs as he plundered her mouth, his short breaths mingling with hers until he came up for air.

  “Jeez, Ree, what you do to me,” Tyler exploded on a shaky breath. “I have loved you since you were six years old and you brought me that frog from the pond. I will love you when I am 96 years old too. I swear. Say you will wait.”

  Regan’s heart was pounding in her chest. She was floating, feeling an odd urge to dance. She threw her arms around his neck and breathed into his ear. “I will wait, Tyler. I love you too and always have.” She spoke the words with total conviction, the sincerity and promise of a grown woman, not a 16-year-old girl. The tears returned, lingering on her eyelashes before falling to her cheeks.

  “You understand, this is our promise?” Tyler asked, sighing a huge sigh of relief. Regan nodded an enthusiastic yes then kissed him again, but reverently. She stepped back to gaze at him, to reassure herself that he had meant the words she had heard.

  “This is forever.” His voice came out just above a whisper, giving her the reassurance she needed.

  Regan looked deep into Tyler’s dark eyes and vowed, “Forever.”

  She watched as Tyler preened with pride. He took her head in his hands and kissed her again and again. She returned his passion until she felt him about to pull back. Regan grabbed his hips and spun Tyler around, pressing him back against the cold steel doors, and taking his mouth, stroking her tongue in a bruising embrace. A small moan of pleasure left her lips, as her body ruled her mind. She pressed her groin into his hips, her breasts tight against his chest and pushed him harder into the door, deepening the kiss.

  His teenage hands wandered under her blouse then hesitated. She knew he was waiting to see if she would stop him. When she didn't, he continued, slipping his hands along her skin, fingers rough against her as he cupped her small breasts. He caressed her as she returned his kisses with fervor. Regan felt a jolt low in her belly as her nipples pebbled.

  Regan encouraged him, and Tyler grew bolder, rubbing the hard nubs and gently squeezing. Regan’s blood was heating, the skin where he touched her was ablaze. Tyler always had this effect on her. She wanted more. Grinding her hips into his groin, Regan pinned him hard against the door, her heart pounding like a freight train.

  Regan knew Tyler was losing control and she savored the moment until he finally pushed her away.

  “Stop, Ree. Remember where we are. Wyatt will kick my ass if he sees us.”

  Always the practical one. Tyler would never make it past second base. Regan heaved a sigh of frustration as Tyler adjusted his leather jacket, then the front of his pants,

  “This isn’t private, Ree. We need some privacy, which we never seem to find anymore.”

  “I am sure no one can see,” Regan insisted, teasing him with her fingers on his belt buckle. He shoved them away. She knew she wouldn’t get him to continue. Logic had overtaken his longing. It was written all over his face.

  “That’s not the only reason I stopped. You push me too far, Regan. I’m only human.”

  He kissed her again but was more circumspect. Regan felt her body cooling, coming down from that all-consuming desire. When they heard voices in the near distance, Tyler pushed her further away from him. She was forced to comply.

  “God I want you,” she rasped in a harsh voice, shocking even herself. So much for calming down. Her body was curious, and desire was coursing through her veins. “Why the hell are we still waiting?”

  “You know why.” The air crackled with the question.

  “Because you love me,” Regan replied simply. Tyler was calm finally, touching Regan’s hand with just the tip of his fingers.

  “Yep, I do. And we have forever.”

  Chapter Four

  Tyler – Twenty Years Earlier

  Dread and shame filled Tyler’s every waking thought, even as he longed to see Regan again. It had been months of lies, elaborate fabrications and missing her until he ached with want.

  College was challenging, and Cornell was exciting, but he couldn't get the taste of juvie out of his mouth. From what he had heard, the place he had been in was ok compared to a real jail, but for a spoiled rich kid from Lake Forest, it was hell. The rooms were bare and the place overcrowded. There was never enough to stimulate his active, inquisitive mind except planning for more trouble. Tyler had sworn to avoid that at all costs.

  It wasn’t easy. If college hadn’t been waiting, there were plenty of kids ready to recruit him into their gangs. They pressed hard, threatening, cajoling, cornering him at all hours of the day and night. He still had nightmares, sometimes waking with a shout, drenched in sweat.

  The subterfuge meant telling lies to Wyatt, who believed Tyler spent an idyllic summer in Europe. Everyone did. His parents had negotiated his college tuition for his silence.

  “You will not destroy your mother or the reputation of this family,” his father commanded on his last day of high school. His friends were prep
aring to celebrate as he packed a minimal wardrobe to the sounds of his mother’s tears. She had begged his father to pay the bail, but his father was an unforgiving asshole.

  His older brother had been no more sympathetic. It would be his job to send postcards from his travels, signing them as Tyler, making it appear as if Tyler was by his side. Denny didn't appreciate baby brother encroaching on his summer. "You owe me, jack off, and I will collect some day,” Denny told him. “What a screw-up you turned out to be.”

  Tyler would never forgive his father. He would never again be close with Denny. Never. Yeah, he hated his father for sending him to juvie, but he hated him more for the intricate network of lies and deceit that would always be between Tyler and his friends, and between Tyler and Regan. Each lie added a brick in a wall, rapidly erected and continuously growing between him and those he had been close to his whole life.

  Tyler had trouble remembering which lie he had told when and to whom, causing him to withdraw more and more. Despite all his efforts, though, Tyler's problems were magnifying. Worst of all, when they began, he had no one to advise him.

  At just 18 years of age, Tyler would typically have turned to his father for help, but his pride would not let him. He hated his father and Tyler no longer trusted that Emmett would have his back. He might have turned to his older brother, but they were barely on speaking terms by the end of that awful summer.

  The old Tyler wouldn’t have hesitated to ask his friends for help, and they would have rushed to his aid, but there was no way to do so without breaking his promise to his parents and losing his tuition. He had learned a hard lesson about life. It could be hard and ugly. He had seen those kids in juvie with no futures. College was his ticket out. He was desperate to succeed now that he could only rely on himself.

  Then there was Regan. He missed her until it was physical pain, but each day apart, each lie, drove a wedge between them. He was struggling to hold on to what they had together when the calls and threats began. While he was unable to solve the problem, at least he could contain it. If he did that well enough, he could salvage his present life. He could have Regan.