The Legend of Johnny Hustle: Crown Me King

by Zach Tate

  “It’s nothing.”

  “Yeah well, let me tell you ‘bout this lady last night, playa. She tried to play a playa and tempt me with ass without the cash. Man, I had her strip down, and blew her mind without taking my clothes off. Had her sticking her fingers every which-a-way ‘til she went crazy. I’ma put that in the book and perfect it.”

  My wheels started turning when we reached 110th on Lenox Avenue. “Yeah, what’s the key with that freak-off scene?”

  “Playa, it’s simple. Talk to her, let her put her hands where she likes it, and make sure she don’t touch you. Sex is mental, playa; get in her head and she will be anything you want her to be in bed.”

  We pulled up to Pan-Pan’s. Cashmere turned stepping inside into a performance. When we reached the cramped, world-famous breakfast spot, we ate buttered waffles, turkey bacon, and eggs. After eating, we walked outside across from Harlem Hospital, and I thought I was seeing things. Crissy was walking my way wearing a gray sweat suit, black high-top Reeboks, and a full-length Shearling coat. Her jaw dropped when she saw me. Before she reached me, Cashmere whispered, “Don’t get mad, playa, be an even playa. Use one of them cons you be running to put that fine hoe in a position where she can hand over some paper, and then leave her stranded. Think on your feet, playa. That’s why you the con man, and I’m the mack.”

  “Hi, John,” Crissy smiled, already pushing my buttons.

  Action! Went off in my head and I pulled her over to the side. “It’s Johnny Hustle now.” I flashed the slum Cartier and her eyes danced on each piece of glass. “When you want some of my time?” I asked, lacing my voice with honey. “I know you still want me.”

  She looked over at the Benz, then at Cashmere, and then back at me. “I just dropped my friend off at the bus terminal. He out of town for the week so what’s up?”

  I looked over at Cashmere, winked, and said, “Take my car and enjoy the sun, playa. Make sure you give me a call so I know where you park it. Oh yeah, I want to meet Pierre when I come out to the coast. Tell him about Johnny Hustle.” I turned to Crissy with love in my eyes. “Right now, I got to handle some unfinished business.”

  Cashmere hit the car alarm while Crissy and I walked a few paces into the luxury apartments of Lenox Terrace. The doorman looked at us strangely as she smiled her way by him. When we reached the white-walled spacious apartment, Crissy said, “Have a seat, I’ll be right back.”

  The apartment was almost an exact duplicate of the one she and I had in the Bronx. The same Seaman’s furniture, the same color television, and the same his-and-her champagne glasses against the mirrors on the living room wall.

  Crissy returned dripping wet with a purple towel wrapped around her naked mid-section. “You want me to make you some of those cheese eggs you like?”

  I smiled with my mind on the prize. “Nah, I want you to tell me about your man.”

  “What you want to know about, Kev?” she asked with a devilish grin.

  I stared at her fine body and immaculate toes and patted the leather couch for her to sit. I then laid all the cash I had in my pockets on the table, making sure she saw the hundreds on top. Then I started to elevate my mark. “You can tell me later. Right now I want you to sit over here and give me what I really like.”

  Crissy’s face lit up. She took long steps to the couch. Before her naked butt was firmly planted in the seat, she was fumbling for my zipper. With no hesitation, Crissy swallowed me. I had to catch myself. I pulled out of her mouth and removed her towel. "Get on the floor,” I ordered, and she didn’t hesitate to comply.

  “You gonna take me back?” she asked when the back of her head rested on the carpet.

  I thought about Cashmere’s advice and wanted to know if his antics would work for me. “Just as long as you do what I tell you to do.”

  “Okay,” she uttered, aiming to please me. Once money was involved, I knew Crissy like a book.

  “Put both of your nipples in your mouth.” Crissy followed my orders, licking her pert nipples like she was being paid for it. “Okay, yeah, now I want you to touch yourself.” Her eyes closed as her hand trailed its way down to her middle. She bent her fingers and pressed play on her wet button.

  “Umm, um, I like this, John.”

  “It’s Johnny Hustle, bitch! And call me by your man’s name. Play with yourself and call out Kev’s name.”

  Two of Crissy’s fingers started stabbing into her middle. She held her sugar walls apart with one hand and then moved the other hand in circles on her clit.

  “Kev! Oh-Kev! Give it to me, Kevin!” her eyes opened, “Like that, Johnny Hustle?’

  “Yeah, just like that. All for Kev in Kev’s house. Now get on your knees,” I ordered, anger fighting to take over my hustle.

  “Now what?” she asked, as her hands moved into her pleasure zone.

  “I want to see a finger go in and out of your butt, while the other hand is inside of you. Try to fit your hand inside of you. One finger at a time.”

  Crissy complied, diminishing any respect I could ever have for her.

  “Oh yes, Kev! Yes, baby,” she moaned as her body rocked into convulsions.

  She collapsed and then trembled onto her back. I knelt by her side, holding the finger she had in her rear. I then put it to her lips. “Lick it for Kev and Johnny Hustle. Lick it all up, baby.”

  Crissy’s eyes darted to the cash, then back to me. “You gonna take me back?” I nodded and she gladly licked her stench from her fingers.

  “You want to be my, bitch? You want me to take you back? So you can drive my Benz, wear my furs, and have the whole world, baby?”

  “Yes, John—oh, I mean, Johnny Hustle.”

  I ripped my belt from my waist and turned it into a noose. I slipped the circle of life and death around her neck and then pulled it tight.

  “Bark, bitch! Bark like a bitch if you want me to take you back.”

  “Ruff!” Crissy barked while on all fours. “Ruff-ruff-ruff!”

  “Louder!” I yelled, walking her towards the bathroom.

  “RUFF! RUFF-RUFF! RUFF-RUFF-RUFF-RUFF!” she complied. Prompting me to take things a step further.

  I stopped at the toilet bowl. Crissy’s forehead furrowed like I was out of my mind. That day I was.

  “I want to take you back. But I need to know you gonna be a good little bitch. I can change your world today, but if you gonna be a bitch, then you got to do what bitches do. Drink out of the toilet!” I commanded.

  Her sulking eyes looked up at me. “How much,” she asked with trembling lips.

  I had to stop myself from smiling. “Just a cup full for Johnny Hustle, baby, and you mine for life.”

  Crissy stared at me, searching for the lies that I never told her in the past. She looked at the water in the toilet, then back at me. I held my homemade leash and flashed the fake diamonds like she was taking up too much of my time. Instantly, a hungry glimmer flashed in her eyes. Diamonds were Crissy’s best friend.

  “Good girl,” I commended her when she swallowed hard gulps. I thought of the day she left me stranded. How that pain led me to Times Square. I flushed the toilet on her head and removed my belt from her neck.

  I left her in the bathroom as I put a plan together in the living room. She came out of the bathroom, wiping her mouth. It was time for phase two of my hustle.

  I lovingly smiled at Crissy, held her in my arms, and then kissed the top of her head. “I want you to come live large with me, but you got to invest in what I’m about to do,” I said softly.

  I could feel the smile against my shirt. “What I got to do, boo? Come on John, I mean Johnny Hustle, I see you Big Willie now. Take me back.”

  “What about your man, Kev?”

  She looked up into my eyes. “What about him? You the only man for me. We can live better than we ever been living. Come on, baby. We can do this.”

  It was hard to contain myself. I was surely a natural hustler.

  “This is what we gonna do, Crissy
. I know your man is paid, or you wouldn’t be with him. I need some paper so we can fly away to Puerto Rico. From there, we flying on a private jet to Cable Beach in the Cayman Islands. I’m about to drop off a half a million down there. I got a crib and the whole nine down there. All it needs is a wife inside. I’m doing big things now, baby, just like you told me to.”

  “Can I come? Please, baby, take me back.”

  I looked at her like she should have known better. “Why you think I came up here? You been haunting my dreams since the night I saw you at the club.” I kissed her on the cheek. “I live in Mid-town. I didn’t have to come way up here just to eat breakfast. That’s what I pay my maids for. I came all the way up here hoping to see you. I let my man drive my Benz away because I didn’t want him to see me begging you to come live with me.”

  “Damn, baby,” she said, certain her plans were coming together. Then she reached for my crotch, my old weakness. “I love you, Johnny Hustle. I’m all yours,” she said, rubbing on me.

  “Then come on then. Let’s leave this place for good. I know your man is getting money, so if you invest in me, I can triple your money and you can live the life as my wife.” I put on a serious face. “But Crissy, you know you the only family I got, so it’s now or never, baby.”

  Dollar signs were rolling past her eyes like a slot machine in a ghetto bodega. “If I give you some paper, you gonna triple it?”

  “Yeah, baby.” I flashed the watch again, rubbed between her naked legs, and said, “Yeah, baby, that’s a small thing, but it has to be big paper.”

  “And you gonna take care of me for life? No bullshit?”

  I pulled off the fake Cartier. “Here. That’s a hundred grand in your hand.” Her jaw dropped. “I got plenty more as long as we start this off right. I’m paid baby, come and get rich with your boo.”

  “How much I need?” she asked, taking the bait.

  “How much you got?”

  She grabbed my hand. She pulled me into the bedroom where she slept with the man she left me for, and opened the closet. At the base of the closet was a short, gray, cast-iron safe.

  “He gave me the combination in case he got locked up. The last I counted, we had seventy five gees in there,” she told me while clasping the watch.

  The small door opened, revealing a few bundles of neatly piled cash. I wanted to show her that it was no big deal so I said, “That’s all?” I smirked and then sighed for emphasis, hoping she fed into my disappointment. “Oh well, I’ll be in the living room on the phone. Bag it up, and bring it with you. Don’t forget your passport. You don’t need clothes. I’ma get you a wardrobe when we get down there.”

  I couldn’t believe my luck. I called Proverb and told him to have $100,000 in small bills ready for me in a paper bag, and to have Marcy and Elexus at the shop when I got there. I killed the line and called Kennedy airport. If I rushed, I had two hours to kill.

  Crissy slivered out of the back room dressed with the watch dangling from her wrist. She had two large Gucci bags that I bought her in the past, and her fur coat hung from her shoulders. I let her hold the bag of cash. She kissed me on the cheek and said, “Thank you.”

  “You know you my heart and soul girl,” I told her like I meant every word.

  “I know,” she declared while we walked out of the apartment.

  Crissy said her farewells to the doorman, convinced that she would never return. As I flagged down a cab on Lenox Avenue, I eased her house keys out of her hands and dropped them in the sewer. “You won’t be needing those where you’re going. No more apartments, it’s time you live in a castle,” I promised.

  We took the cab straight to the Carter. During the ride, I worked and re-worked the hustle to get even with Crissy. I walked up to Suki, and asked for Yoda’s keys. I told Crissy to sit in the immaculate lobby until I returned. I left her with the cash, eased my way into the service elevator, and took it down to the basement.

  After opening the locks, and kicking a few rats, I worked my way into Camera World. Abdullah looked at me, shrugged his shoulders, and I slipped a camera around my neck and told him I’d be back.

  I dashed around to Proverb’s shop where the two queers sat impatiently. I laid my plan down to the queers, double checking if they could pull it off.

  “We can work it and then reverse it,” Marcy reminded me.

  “Negro Puh-leeze!” Elexus said for me doubting his skills before they rushed out to catch a cab.

  I borrowed a hundred grand from Proverb.

  With time working against me, I ran across the street to another souvenir shop to purchase bootleg designer luggage. I smelled Marcy’s perfume lingering in the shop. I quickly loaded the bottom of a leather bag with rolls of newspaper and three pounds of wooden blocks. I dumped the cash from Proverb on top, leaving enough room for Crissy’s cash. I dumped all the paper garbage and a five-pound weight inside the small counterfeit designer suitcase that I bought.

  Quickly, I raced into Camera World and headed for the back until I worked my way back to the Carter.

  Crissy was sitting in the lobby with worry on her face. Her eyes lit up when she saw my suitcases.

  “Follow me,” I told her, heading for Yoda’s elevator. I pulled her onto the elevator, so no one could see us, and I opened the smaller bag with the cash in it.

  “Wow! I really love you, Johnny Hustle. Thank you for still loving me,” Crissy said when she saw all the cash.

  “That’s a half a mill right there,” I lied. “Pour your money on top of that. Now hold it and promise me that I can trust you with my money. It’s a small amount of paper, but I need to know that I can trust you.”

  Crissy looked at me like I was foolish to consider her larcenous. “I promise, boo. I love you to death,” she said.

  “Good, so when we get to the airport, don’t worry about anything. We allowed to carry as much cash as we want. That’s why we going to Puerto Rico first. There ain’t no risk in this, you gone win all the way around, if you love me.”

  Crissy stacked her bills on top of mine and we left her bag in the elevator. As soon as we descended the red carpeted steps from the Carter, a cabby saw Crissy’s fur and stopped. Everything was working in my favor.

  “J-F-K and step on it!” I said, handing the driver a $50.00 bill.

  The driver sped across town, went over the Queensboro Bridge, and raced across to the airport.

  When we pulled up to the American Airlines terminal, I saw Marcy, Elexus, and their security friend talking to a feminine security man from the airlines. I winked at the queers. I walked up to the ticket counter, dropped of my suitcase, and purchased two first class tickets to the Puerto Rico.

  “Excuse me, sir?” a feminine voice said behind me.

  It was the gay security guard, minus his entourage. Out of Crissy’s earshot, I asked the man if he knew the plan and he nodded. I laid it down to him again and said, “Crissy, give me the watch and your passport, boo. Security wants to escort us because we the richest people in here.”

  She handed me her passport and my watch, not realizing that she didn’t need a passport to go to Puerto Rico. I slapped the fake timepiece on my wrist, hid it under my cuff, and the security man said, “Follow me, your plane is about to leave.”

  Crissy was impressed that we had a security escort and that the plane was being held for us. When we reached the metal detectors, I saw Marcy and Elexus standing with their backs to us. Everything was going according to plan, but when our bags were being X-rayed, Marcy dropped the ball. I thought of Crissy sipping from the toilet and knew I had to take one for the team.

  “Come here, baby,” I said, sinking my tongue deep into her mouth, trying to distract her from the X-ray machine.

  I heard, “This way, sir,” realizing my plan worked when Marcy and Elexus were no where in sight.

  Crissy and I walked hand-in-hand to Gate 19, where a stewardess awaited. We sat in first class, and then I held my stomach.

  “Damn, I got to go
to the bathroom.” I stood, grabbed her fur coat, and sat the cash in her lap. “Hold that and don’t open it.” I looked around nervously. “We don’t want none of these broke people scheming on us.” I kissed her forehead. “You know I take long in the toilet, so let me put your coat up and I’ll be back by the time we in the air.” I held my stomach and winced. “That food from Pan-Pan’s is killing me.” As I walked away, Crissy ordered a drink, and got comfortable in her first class seat.

  I raced past the stewardess with Crissy’s fur coat in hand, cut a sharp left, and found the gay security man waiting at the walkway with the door to the plane open. I dashed out the door, helped the man seal the jumbo jet, and headed out the terminal $70,000 richer.

  $5,000 went to Marcy, Elexus and the security man. They switched luggage after Crissy dropped the bag to be X-rayed. It paid to plan ahead and those queers helped it all come together. Meanwhile, Crissy was on her way to being stranded in another world. Getting even felt a lot better than getting mad.

  $$$

  When the cab dropped me off on the corner of Forty second and Seventh, I checked with Proverb. He had a gold plate with a lot of cash waiting for me. We laughed at the short con, and how I was going crazy getting the work material together.

  Once my business was done, I walked briskly towards the Marriott and ran into Money Russ. He was with his wife, Dot; his subject, Green Eyes, and their student, Black Justice.

  “Word has it that you ready to take my crown?” Russ stated as his crew blocked my path.