Love Me With Fury

by Janelle Taylor

  “If you’re lying to me, I’ll beat you to within an inch of your miserable life!” he snarled, unprepared for this news or for seeing her again. Not a day had passed without thinking about her, wanting her!

  “Stick around for a month, and you’ll see the evidence for yourself! Maybe sooner. What do I know about such things? Once I foolishly enticed you to assist my freedom, but all you’ve done was give me more chains. It isn’t fair, Stephen. I’m practically a child myself,” she miserably stated, weeping in fear of her ruse not working. If she could pull it off, surely he wouldn’t take her along. He was ruthless and cruel, but was he totally heartless?

  “You expect me to walk away and leave my child to another man?” he asked in surprise, coming forward to stand before her.

  Stunned by the fury in his tone and expression, she was speechless. They stared at each other. “Are you saying you’ll marry me?” she finally asked, her look of disbelief too real to discount.

  “I can’t. Not now. But I’ll make sure you’re both taken care of, Angel,” he vowed, looking ill at ease for the first time ever.

  “You might not care if your son is born a bastard, but I do! He’ll have a name and a father when he enters this world! I don’t need your help or your pity. Just leave me alone to work out this problem,” she angrily spouted at him. “He doesn’t need the additional stain your reputation would brand upon him. He’ll already arrive too suspiciously early to avoid gossip.”

  “He’s my son and my responsibility,” he argued with the only female to ever break through his rigid guard and fill his life and heart.

  “No, Captain Steele; he’s my son. You ruined my life, but I won’t allow you to harm his. I’ll see you hanged first!” she fiercely declared.

  “Why didn’t you tell me you were pregnant?” he growled, his own anger rising. Damn, he wanted her! What rotten timing he had!

  “I didn’t know! Everything’s arranged and I won’t permit you to mess things up for me again.” Even while engaged in this frantic ruse, Alexandria didn’t guess she might be telling the truth.

  “What’s the man’s name?” he harshly demanded.

  “And let you come strolling into our lives again someday? No way, Steele. Haven’t you any decency at all? Are you so unfeeling and selfish? What about me and our child? It’s all your fault!”

  “I never meant for this to happen, Angel,” he defended himself, wondering what to do about her and the baby.

  “You’re an experienced man, Steele. You should have known better,” she taunted him. Seeing the infuriating effect of her stinging words, she cautioned herself to a milder approach. “Please, Stephen, there’s nothing you can do to solve this problem. Don’t make it any worse for me.”

  She turned away from him, praying he wouldn’t read the deception in her eyes. His nearness sparked too many feelings of desire for him, feelings she couldn’t destroy or yield to. Tears of self-betrayal flowed down her cheeks. Was she a fool? Even now, she wanted him desperately. Her shoulders trembled as she wept silently.

  “Angel?” he murmured tenderly, but didn’t continue.

  She slowly turned to look up into his eyes, sensing she had won and he would leave soon. Misreading the anguish in her dewy eyes, he reached out and pulled her into his arms. Unable to help herself, she did not resist this much needed contact for the last time.

  “I’m sorry, love. I wouldn’t hurt you for anything,” he whispered into her ear.

  “You already have, Stephen,” she sadly told him. “I’ve never wanted anything in my life as much as I wanted you. Why did it have to be this way?”

  His embrace tightened. “Our timing was all wrong, love. Believe it or not, I wish it wasn’t.”

  She looked up at him and inquired, “Do you really mean that, Stephen? If things had been different, could you have loved me, too?”

  Too? he caught her slip. “Are you in love with me, Angel?” he couldn’t help but ask, needing to hear those words from her.

  She lowered her head and laughed sadly, “How could I possibly love a pirate like you? A man who blundered into my world and devastated it?”

  “As much as you wish it weren’t true, it is,” he answered for her.

  She stiffened; her lips and chin quivered. She didn’t respond. He lifted her chin and forced their gazes to meet. “I’m right, aren’t I?”

  She didn’t have to answer aloud, her eyes screamed her stifled response. “Of all men to choose from, why you, Stephen? My God, why you?” she cried out in utter despair, her composure stripped away.

  Spencer’s mouth came down upon hers, at first gentle and then almost savage. She clung to him in a painful last parting. It had been so long since her blood had flamed with hunger and her heart had felt alive and free. He lifted her light body and carried her to his bed. Between kisses and caresses, he undressed each of them. Their bodies and hearts yearned for this union so long desired. It would be their final farewell, but it would be remembered forever, she vowed.

  XVI

  “Love looks not with the eyes,…

  And therefore is winged Cupid painted blind.”

  —A Midsummer Night’s Dream, William Shakespeare

  Their first joining had been with a savage and urgent intensity. But their second one was leisurely sensual and tenderly passionate. For a time, only Alex and Spencer lay upon the bed making love, no longer past enemies or future combatants. His tasty mouth explored hers as his hands expertly and gently fondled the body which had haunted him day and night since her mind-staggering disappearance. Beneath him lay the one woman who could stir his mind and heart to rebel against all he had thought or known. How could he ever give her up or lose her again? He couldn’t; yet, he stubbornly refused to allow her the knowledge of her power over him.

  Spencer teased her sensitive breasts and devoured her lips. To think of another man possessing her was too much to accept and he wouldn’t. As he lay there beside her, he stroked her tawny hair and caressed her passion-flushed cheek. Unable to touch her enough or to halt these feelings of tenderness and love from besieging him, he declined to speak or to move.

  It was Alex who broke the spell between them. She propped up on her elbow and gazed down at him. Her fingers traced the angles of his face, stroked his hair, and played in the furry mat upon his chest. As she ran her finger over his sensual lips, he seized it gently with his teeth and held it captive. She laughed.

  “What a vicious bite you have, my lusty dragon,” she teased, leaning over to kiss him.

  He released the finger to allow her lips to replace it. “I’ve missed you, Angel,” he confessed.

  “And I, you,” she admitted, laying her tawny head upon his chest.

  He caught himself before demanding why she had fled him, knowing why and not wishing to spoil this moment he had yearned for and had feared to never experience again. His hand came up to hold her head close to him. He wished the war was over and he could either go to England or to his Virginia plantation. He loved and needed this slip of a common girl!

  Recalling his meeting with Cassandra the night before, he wondered why he had ever taken any time with her. He smothered his laughter at the remembrance of their argument and his stinging rejection of her offer to become his mistress. With Angelique safely returned to his side, he needed and wanted no other woman. A child…somehow that thought didn’t distress him at all. Once Will got over the initial shock of his marriage to a commoner, his grandfather would come to love Angelique and their child as much as he himself did now.

  Only a few details remained to be settled. He would keep her here with him. Naturally she couldn’t be allowed to marry another man. He must retrieve his legal seal from a close and trusted friend and marry Angelique before he put to sea again. He would take her home to Virginia and place her under Thomas’s watchful eye. She would be safe and happy there.

  “I must leave, Stephen,” she whispered softly in a reluctant tone. “I can’t afford idle gossip about me right bef
ore my marriage.”

  “You can’t marry another man, Angel; you belong to me. I have some important business which will take about an hour, love. Stay here until I return, then I’ll decide how to handle everything. I don’t want to ever lose you again. My cabin’s too quiet and empty.”

  “I can’t stay here, Stephen. I’ve already been gone too long now,” she weakly protested, making no attempt to get up and dress, feeling she must use patience and love to earn his trust if she were to escape him soon. Did he still think her so gullible and naive as to recklessly fall for his disarming tricks again? Yes, he did.

  He smiled. “I promise I won’t be long. Please do as I ask just once,” he wheedled. “I promise to bring you a surprise if you’re a good girl.”

  She laughed cheerfully. “The only surprise I want is you.”

  “You can have that, too. From now on, love, I’ll never let you out of my sight. Have you any objections to sharing my life and future?” he asked, flashing her a beguiling grin.

  Stunned speechless, she gaped at him. Believing this was either a trick or a cruel lie, pain knifed her heart. Mistress and prisoner perhaps, but nothing more. How much longer could she endure this torturous game before this sea-devil eviscerated her heart and soul? She forced a smile. “I can think of nothing better,” she vowed truthfully. To fully disarm him and to win his trust, she snuggled into his arms and whispered, “I love you, Stephen. My life is nothing without you. Please hurry back”

  Tears, which he assumed to be those of happiness, burned his naked chest. The arrogant rogue was convinced she, like any female, loved and wanted him at any price. She had no choice but to use that male pride against him now. But his emotions weren’t the only ones being subjected to this game.

  “Within the hour, I promise. Never have I wanted a woman as much as you, Angelique,” he stated clearly, denying her the full truth.

  “Oh, Stephen, it’s so wonderful to have you again.” She hugged him tightly, offering her lips to his, dreading the final score of this brutal game between them. Neither would be a winner…

  “You, too, Miss DuBois,” he announced, kissing her soundly.

  She laughed. “Since you have managed to learn my identity, do I get to know yours now?” she hinted, placing kisses over his face and eyes.

  “When I return in an hour, I promise to tell you,” he teased playfully. “In fact, love, we have a lot of talking and planning to do.” He got up and slowly dressed, his gaze rarely leaving her.

  When fully clothed, he leaned over and kissed her. “I’ll be back soon.”

  “Shall I wait here or get dressed?” she wantonly jested, bringing a heated look to his eyes as she curiously awaited his response.

  “You’d better dress just in case I’m not alone,” he lazily replied, unaware of her conclusions.

  “I’d much prefer to remain right here, but if you insist, my love.” She threw the covers aside and stood up. What more could she do to tempt or sway him? Was he utterly unreachable? Had this romantic cause been lost to her even that first day by the pond? She was granting him every chance possible to. prove he loved her and wanted her in this same way. Please, Stephen, love me as I love you, she fervently prayed.

  His eyes raked appreciatively over her provocative body. “You wouldn’t be trying to change my mind, you wanton temptress, would you? I have to leave for a while; there’s something mighty important to both of us which I must do. After tonight, everything will be all right, Angel.”

  “Me try to change your mind?” she innocently inquired. Once she was gone, she would make certain he would long remember her and this treacherous night!

  He came over and pulled her to him. His mouth came down over hers. She clung to him, savoring these fleeting moments before his loss. Becoming aroused again, he pulled away and sighed. “Later, love. If I don’t leave now, I never will.”

  “Would that be so terrible?” she mischievously taunted. “For weeks I’ve endured a painful separation from you. I never thought to ever see you again. I shall never have enough of you, Stephen.”

  “I hope you mean that, woman; forever is a mighty long time.”

  Bubbly laughter came forth. What a stimulating and exciting life they could share if he would allow it. Bitterly recalling those first few weeks aboard his ship when he had so easily and cruelly deceived her with the same way he was behaving now, she steeled her heart against his tender words and enticing caresses. No words of love or promises of marriage…

  “Get dressed and wait for me, you sultry siren. I plan to keep you busy after tonight,” he huskily warned.

  “Yes, Captain Steele,” she cooed, saluting him and grinning.

  He kissed her and left, believing she would wait for him. It was clear she loved him and desired him. And, he was the father of the child she was carrying. Add those facts to his show of trust in her, she would be there…

  The moment the door closed, Alex was up and frantically dressing. She went to the writing desk and sat down to compose a note. She could envision his fury when he came back and found her missing. No doubt he would either bring the American authorities with him or a trunk to lock her in until he could take her to his ship! “Never will I succumb to you or be your slave again, my dashing rogue.”

  She walked slowly to the bed and stood beside it. Tormented and accused by its rumpled condition, she hastily straightened the covers. She placed the note on the front pillow where he would be sure to see it. She leaned over and read it one last time:

  J.S.,

  When you return with your confederates to betray me one last time or with your trunk to steal me in, I will be long gone from your sight and reach forever. Never will I yield to the carnal weaknesses you inspire, nor become your slave again. If you thought for one moment your cunning ruse worked as it did before, you were mistaken, my treacherous love. You need not fret over the loss of your child, for one never existed. As you can see by my successful escape once more, I learned much about deception and revenge from you. May you rot in prison for what you have done to me. For as long as I think of you and recall your many betrayals, I shall curse you and hate you. Surely if you show your face again, my husband will slay you where you stand. Farewell, my dashing rogue.

  A.H.

  She smiled sadly as she envisioned his face and reaction to learning she wasn’t carrying his child and had cunningly fooled him completely. Maybe he would be infuriated by the idea of her marrying another man. She glanced at the initials on the note. She reached for it to change them, but changed her mind instead. Let him stew and puzzle over the implication there! Besides, they were leaving in the morning. She would be careful until then. He would never look for her right under his nose! She hurriedly departed, taking one last glance backwards before closing the door. “Goodbye, my love, this time forever,” she murmured wretchedly.

  Not daring to tempt fate and Joshua’s persistence, Alex ordered a light meal sent to her room. It was late when her uncle returned and went to bed. The course was plotted and she was ready to sail toward some obscure future. She hoped their plans had not been changed.

  One floor below her, Spencer was sitting in a chair in the dark. He had been a fool to leave her alone! Didn’t he realize she would never trust him enough to wait for his return? He made no attempt to search for her this time. No doubt she was long gone as stated. Between cursing her and himself and longing for her return, he sat there numb as if grieving for a love who was now eternally lost to death. Anguish, fury, and sadness stormed him.

  Spencer hadn’t known what it was to love someone so much or to feel such torment at a careless loss. Three times she had mysteriously entered his life and three times she had agonizingly left it. Surely his luck had run out. Three chances to win her without success. Who was this elusive siren who plagued his life and heart? No child? Could he believe her denial? No, there was a child and she was only trying to punish him. Did she think him totally naive? Her rounding tummy revealed the truth! He should have
confessed his love and taken her straight to some minister and wed her!

  A.H.? Another ruse, or was this finally the truth? If only she had waited! To find that one unique woman, to love her, to need her, and to needlessly lose her was torture. Why, Angel?

  What use was there in looking for her? She had made her plans and would carry them out. Who would become the father of his child and the owner of his woman? Fury and jealousy gnawed at him.

  “You best hope our paths never cross again, Angel, for you’ll never escape me again!” he swore between clenched teeth.

  Going over the orders received from Madison that night, Spencer threw himself upon the bed to face a restless night before returning to his ship in the morning to set sail for Jamaica. Once matters were settled, he needed to go home to see his aging grandfather once more.

  Upon arising, Alex was violently ill. Concerned, her uncle sent for a doctor. When the results were delivered to her after his examination, Alex fainted in shock. Surely the fates were punishing her for her sins and deceits!

  After the doctor left, Henry came in to speak with her. Seeing his look of anguish and shock, she wretchedly inquired, “He told you?”

  “Yes, child, and I’m sorry.” He dejectedly dropped into the chair by the window. Surely this was all his fault. How could he have been so careless and weakspined with her safety?

  “What can I do, Uncle Henry? He’s probably gone by now,” she wailed.

  “Who’s gone, Alex?” he asked in confusion, thinking her suffering from shock, wondering why she wasn’t accusing him of allowing this terrible thing to happen to her.

  Almost hysterical, she shrieked, “Joshua Steele, that rogue who ravished me! He was here at the hotel yesterday. He tried to kidnap me again, but I tricked him and eluded him a second time. My God, I’m carrying Joshua Steele’s child!”