Vanity Fair (Barnes & Noble Classics Series)

by William Makepeace Thackeray

  ‘Poor thing, poor thing!‘ says Briggs (who was thinking of twenty-four years back, and that hecticfe young writing-master, whose lock of yellow hair, and whose letters, beautiful in their illegibility, she cherished in her old desk upstairs). ‘Poor thing, poor thing!‘ says Briggs. Once more she was a fresh-cheeked lass of eighteen; she was at evening church, and the hectic writing-master and she were quavering out of the same psalm-book.

  ‘After such conduct on Rebecca‘s part,‘ Miss Crawley said enthusiastically, ‘our family should do something. Find out who is the objet, Briggs. I‘ll set him up in a shop; or order my portrait of him, you know; or speak to my cousin, the bishop—and I‘ll doterff Becky, and we‘ll have a wedding, Briggs, and you shall make the breakfast, and be a bridesmaid.‘

  Briggs declared that it would be delightful, and vowed that her dear Miss Crawley was always kind and generous, and went up to Rebecca‘s bedroom to console her and prattle about the offer, and the refusal, and the cause thereof; and to hint at the generous intentions of Miss Crawley, and to find out who was the gentleman that had the mastery of Miss Sharp‘s heart.

  Rebecca was very kind, very affectionate and affected—responded to Briggs‘s offers of tenderness with grateful fervour—owned there was a secret attachment—a delicious mystery—what a pity Miss Briggs had not remained half a minute longer at the keyhole! Rebecca might perhaps, have told more: but five minutes after Miss Briggs‘s arrival in Rebecca‘s apartment, Miss Crawley actually made her appearance there—an unheard-of honour;—her impatience had overcome her; she could not wait for the tardy operations of her ambassadress: so she came in person, and ordered Briggs out of the room. And expressing her approval of Rebecca‘s conduct, she asked particulars of the interview, and the previous transactions which had brought about the astonishing offer of Sir Pitt.

  Rebecca said she had long had some notion of the partiality with which Sir Pitt honoured her (for he was in the habit of making his feelings known in a very frank and unreserved manner), but, not to mention private reasons with which she would not for the present trouble Miss Crawley, Sir Pitt‘s age, station, and habits were such as to render a marriage quite impossible; and could a woman with any feeling of self-respect and any decency listen to proposals at such a moment, when the funeral of the lover‘s deceased wife had not actually taken place?

  ‘Nonsense, my dear, you would never have refused him had there not been some one else in the case,‘ Miss Crawley said, coming to her point at once. ‘Tell me the private reasons: what are the private reasons? There is some one; who is it that has touched your heart?‘

  Rebecca cast down her eyes, and owned there was. ‘You have guessed right, dear lady,‘ she said, with a sweet simple faltering voice. ‘You wonder at one so poor and friendless having an attachment, don‘t you? I have never heard that poverty was any safeguard against it. I wish it were.‘

  ‘My poor dear child,‘ cried Miss Crawley, who was always quite ready to be sentimental, ‘is our passion unrequited, then? Are we pining in secret? Tell me all, and let me console you.‘

  ‘I wish you could, dear madam,‘ Rebecca said in the same tearful tone. ‘Indeed, indeed, I need it.‘ And she laid her head upon Miss Crawley‘s shoulder and wept there so naturally that the old lady, surprised into sympathy, embraced her with an almost maternal kindness, uttered many soothing protests of regard and affection for her, vowed that she loved her as a daughter, and would do everything in her power to serve her. ‘And now who is it, my dear? Is it that pretty Miss Sedley‘s brother? You said something about an affair with him. I‘ll ask him here, my dear. And you shall have him: indeed you shall.‘

  ‘Don‘t ask me now,‘ Rebecca said. ‘You shall know all soon. Indeed you shall. Dear kind Miss Crawley—dear friend, may I say so?‘

  ‘That you may, my child,‘ the old lady replied, kissing her.

  ‘I can‘t tell you now,‘ sobbed out Rebecca, ‘I am very miserable. But oh! love me always—promise you will love me always.‘ And in the midst of mutual tears—for the emotions of the younger woman had awakened the sympathies of the elder—this promise was solemnly given by Miss Crawley, who left her little protégée, blessing and admiring her as a dear, artless, tender-hearted, affectionate, incomprehensible creature.

  And now she was left alone to think over the sudden and wonderful events of the day, and of what had been and what might have been. What think you were the private feelings of Miss, no (begging her pardon), of Mrs. Rebecca? If, a few pages back, the present writer claimed the privilege of peeping into Miss Amelia Sedley‘s bedroom, and understanding with the omniscience of the novelist all the gentle pains and passions which were tossing upon that innocent pillow, why should he not declare himself to be Rebecca‘s confidant too, master of her secrets, and seal-keeper of that young woman‘s conscience?

  Well then, in the first place, Rebecca gave way to some very sincere and touching regrets that a piece of marvellous good fortune should have been so near her, and she actually obliged to decline it. In this natural emotion every properly regulated mind will certainly share. What good mother is there that would not commiserate a penniless spinster, who might have been my lady, and have shared four thousand a year? What well-bred young person is there in all Vanity Fair, who will not feel for a hard-working, ingenious, meritorious girl, who gets such an honourable, advantageous, provoking offer, just at the very moment when it is out of her power to accept it? I am sure our friend Becky‘s disappointment deserves and will command every sympathy.

  I remember one night being in the Fair myself, at an evening party. I observed old Miss Toady there also present, single out for her special attentions and flattery little Mrs. Briefless, the barrister‘s wife, who is of a good family certainly, but, as we all know, is as poor as poor can be.

  What, I asked in my own mind, can cause this obsequiousness on the part of Miss Toady; has Briefless got a county court, or has his wife had a fortune left her? Miss Toady explained presently, with that simplicity which distinguishes all her conduct. ‘You know,‘ she said, ‘Mrs. Briefless is grand-daughter of Sir John Redhand, who is so ill at Cheltenham that he can‘t last six months. Mrs. Briefless‘s papa succeeds; so you see she will be a baronet‘s daughter.‘ And Toady asked Briefless and his wife to dinner the very next week.

  If the mere chance of becoming a baronet‘s daughter can procure a lady such homage in the world, surely, surely we may respect the agonies of a young woman who has lost the opportunity of becoming a baronet‘s wife. Who would have dreamed of Lady Crawley dying so soon? She was one of those sickly women that might have lasted these ten years—Rebecca thought to herself, in all the woes of repentance—and I might have been my lady! I might have led that old man whither I would. I might have thanked Mrs. Bute for her patronage, and Mr. Pitt for his insufferable condescension. I would have had the town-house newly furnished and decorated. I would have had the handsomest carriage in London, and a box at the opera; and I would have been presented next season. All this might have been; and now—now all was doubt and mystery.

  But Rebecca was a young lady of too much resolution and energy of character to permit herself much useless and unseemly sorrow for the irrevocable past; so, having devoted only the proper portion of regret to it, she wisely returned her whole attention towards the future, which was now vastly more important to her. And she surveyed her position, and its hopes, doubts, and chances.

  In the first place, she was married;—that was a great fact. Sir Pitt knew it. She was not so much surprised into the avowal, as induced to make it by a sudden calculation. It must have come some day: and why not now as at a later period? He who would have married her himself must at least be silent with regard to her marriage. How Miss Crawley would bear the news—was the great question. Misgivings Rebecca had; but she remembered all Miss Crawley had said; the old lady‘s avowed contempt for birth; her daring liberal opinions; her general romantic propensities; her almost doting attachment to her nephew, and her repea
tedly-expressed fondness for Rebecca herself. She is so fond of him, Rebecca thought, that she will forgive him anything: she is so used to me that I don‘t think she could be comfortable without me: when the éclaircissementfg comes there will be a scene, and hysterics, and a great quarrel, and then a great reconciliation. At all events, what use was there in delaying? the die was thrown, and now or to-morrow the issue must be the same. And so, resolved that Miss Crawley should have the news, the young person debated in her mind as to the best means of conveying it to her; and whether she should face the storm that must come, or fly and avoid it until its first fury was blown over. In this state of meditation she wrote the following letter:—

  DEAREST FRIEND,—

  The great crisis which we have debated about so often is come. Half of my secret is known, and I have thought and thought, until I am quite sure that now is the time to reveal the whole of the mystery. Sir Pitt came to me this morning, and made—what do you think?—a declaration in form. Think of that! Poor little me! I might have been Lady Crawley. How pleased Mrs. Bute would have been; and ma tantefh if I had taken precedence of her! I might have been somebody‘s mamma, instead of—Oh, I tremble, I tremble, when I think how soon we must tell all!—

  Sir Pitt knows I am married, and not knowing to whom, is not very much displeased as yet. Ma tante is actually angry that I should have refused him. But she is all kindness and graciousness. She condescends to say I would have made him a good wife; and vows that she will be a mother to your little Rebecca. She will be shaken when she first hears the news. But need we fear anything beyond a momentary anger? I think not: I am sure not. She dotes upon you so (you naughty, good-for-nothing man), that she would pardon you anything: and, indeed, I believe, the next place in her heart is mine: and that she would be miserable without me. Dearest! something tells me we shall conquer. You shall leave that odious regiment: quit gaming, racing, and be a good boy; and we shall all live in Park Lane, and ma tante shall leave us all her money.

  I shall try and walk to-morrow at 3 in the usual place. If Miss B. accompanies me, you must come to dinner, and bring an answer, and put it in the third volume of Porteus‘s Sermons. But, at all events, come to your own

  R.

  To Miss ELIZA STYLES,

  At Mr. Barnet‘s, Saddler, Knightsbridge.

  And I trust there is no reader of this little story who has not discernment enough to perceive that the Miss Eliza Styles (an old schoolfellow, Rebecca said, with whom she had resumed an active correspondence of late), and who used to fetch these letters from the saddler‘s, wore brass spurs, and large curling moustachios, and was indeed no other than Captain Rawdon Crawley.

  CHAPTER XVI

  The Letter on the Pincushion

  How they were married is not of the slightest consequence to anybody. What is to hinder a captain who is a major, and a young lady who is of age, from purchasing a licence, and uniting themselves at any church in this town? Who needs to be told, that if a woman has a will, she will assuredly find a way?—My belief is, that one day, when Miss Sharp had gone to pass the forenoon with her dear friend Miss Amelia Sedley in Russell Square, a lady very like her might have been seen entering a church in the city, in company with a gentleman with dyed moustachios, who, after a quarter of an hour‘s interval, escorted her back to the hackney-coach in waiting, and that this was a quiet bridal party.

  And who on earth, after the daily experience we have, can question the probability of a gentleman marrying anybody? How many of the wise and learned have married their cooks? Did not Lord Eldonfi himself, the most prudent of men, make a runaway match? Were not Achilles and Ajaxfj both in love with their servant-maids? And are we to expect a heavy dragoon with strong desires and small brains, who had never controlled a passion in his life, to become prudent all of a sudden, and to refuse to pay any price for an indulgence to which he had a mind? If people only made prudent marriages, what a stop to population there would be!

  It seems to me, for my part, that Mr. Rawdon‘s marriage was one of the honestest actions which we shall have to record in any portion of that gentleman‘s biography which has to do with the present history. No one will say it is unmanly to be captivated by a woman, or, being captivated, to marry her; and the admiration, the delight, the passion, the wonder, the unbounded confidence, and frantic adoration with which, by degrees, this big warrior got to regard the little Rebecca, were feelings which the ladies at least will pronounce were not altogether discreditable to him. When she sang, every note thrilled in his dull soul, and tingled through his huge frame. When she spoke, he brought all the force of his brains to listen and wonder. If she was jocular, he used to revolve her jokes in his mind, and explode over them half an hour afterwards in the street, to the surprise of the groom in the tilburyfk by his side, or the comrade riding with him in Rotten Row. Her words were oracles to him, her smallest actions marked by an infallible grace and wisdom. ‘How she sings—how she paints,‘ thought he. ‘How she rode that kicking mare at Queen‘s Crawley!‘ And he would say to her in confidential moments, ‘By Jove, Beck, you‘re fit to be Commander-in-Chief, or Archbishop of Canterbury, by Jove.‘ Is his case a rare one? and don‘t we see every day in the world many an honest Hercules at the apron-strings of Omphale,fl and great whiskered Samsons prostrate in Delilah‘s lap?

  When, then, Becky told him that the great crisis was near, and the time for action had arrived, Rawdon expressed himself as ready to act under her orders, as he would be to charge with his troop at the command of his colonel. There was no need for him to put his letter into the third volume of Porteus. Rebecca easily found a means to get rid of Briggs, her companion, and met her faithful friend in ‘the usual place‘ on the next day. She had thought over matters at night, and communicated to Rawdon the result of her determinations. He agreed, of course, to everything; was quite sure that it was all right: that what she proposed was best; that Miss Crawley would infallibly relent, or ‘come round‘, as he said, after a time. Had Rebecca‘s resolutions been entirely different, he would have followed them as implicitly. ‘You have head enough for both of us, Beck,‘ said he. ‘You‘re sure to get us out of the scrape. I never saw your equal, and I‘ve met with some clippers in my time too.‘ And with this simple confession of faith, the love-stricken dragoon left her to execute his part of the project which she had formed for the pair.

  It consisted simply in the hiring of quiet lodgings at Brompton, or in the neighbourhood of the barracks, for Captain and Mrs. Crawley. For Rebecca had determined, and very prudently, we think, to fly. Rawdon was only too happy at her resolve; he had been entreating her to take this measure any time for weeks past. He pranced off to engage the lodgings with all the impetuosity of love. He agreed to pay two guineas a week so readily, that the landlady regretted she had asked him so little. He ordered in a piano; and half a nursery-house full of flowers: and a heap of good things. As for shawls, kid gloves, silk stockings, gold French watches, bracelets and perfumery, he sent them in with the profusion of blind love and unbounded credit. And having relieved his mind by this outpouring of generosity, he went and dined nervously at the club, waiting until the great moment of his life should come.

  The occurrences of the previous day; the admirable conduct of Rebecca in refusing an offer so advantageous to her, the secret unhappiness preying upon her, the sweetness and silence with which she bore her affliction, made Miss Crawley much more tender than usual. An event of this nature, a marriage, or a refusal, or a proposal, thrills through a whole houseful of women, and sets all their hysterical sympathies at work. As an observer of human nature, I regularly frequent St. George‘s, Hanover Square, during the genteel marriage season; and though I have never seen the bridegroom‘s male friends give way to tears, or the beadles and officiating clergy any way affected, yet it is not at all uncommon to see women who are not in the least concerned in the operations going on—old ladies who are long past marrying, stout middle-aged females with plenty of sons and daughters, let alone
pretty young creatures in pink bonnets, who are on their promotion,fm and may naturally take an interest in the ceremony,—I say it is quite common to see the women present piping, sobbing, sniffling; hiding their little faces in their little useless pocket-handkerchiefs; and heaving, old and young, with emotion. When my friend, the fashionable John Pimlico, married the lovely Lady Belgravia Green Parker, the excitement was so general, that even the little snuffy old pew-opener who let me into the seat, was in tears. And wherefore? I inquired of my own soul: she was not going to be married.

  Miss Crawley and Briggs in a word, after the affair of Sir Pitt, indulged in the utmost luxury of sentiment, and Rebecca became an object of the most tender interest to them. In her absence Miss Crawley solaced herself with the most sentimental of the novels in her library. Little Sharp, with her secret griefs, was the heroine of the day.

  That night Rebecca sang more sweetly and talked more pleasantly than she had ever been heard to do in Park Lane. She twined herself round the heart of Miss Crawley. She spoke lightly and laughingly of Sir Pitt‘s proposal, ridiculed it as the foolish fancy of an old man; and her eyes filled with tears, and Briggs‘s heart with unutterable pangs of defeat, as she said she desired no other lot than to remain for ever with her dear benefactress. ‘My dear little creature,‘ the old lady said, ‘I don‘t intend to let you stir for years, that you may depend upon it. As for going back to that odious brother of mine after what has passed, it is out of the question. Here you stay with me and Briggs. Briggs wants to go to see her relations very often. Briggs, you may go when you like. But as for you, my dear, you must stay and take care of the old woman.‘