I was about to breathe into her mouth again when her body jerked and her eyes fluttered; she sucked in a big breath and started coughing in big, convulsing gasps. She blinked a few times and tried to sit up.
“Hold on,” I said. “You’re okay, you’re okay. Just hold on, though. Don’t try to get up yet.” I had one eye on Lucas, who was still lying there on his back like he was taking an afternoon nap. I pulled my phone out of my pocket and was about to call the police, but then I stopped. I knew Lucas’s type; he was like Teflon—shit just didn’t stick. I’d handle this myself.
“I’m okay,” Emmy said, her voice hoarse. “What happened?”
“What happened is that this piece of shit just tried to kill you.”
“I think I can sit up.”
The marks on her neck seemed even brighter, like she was wearing a crimson collar. Lucas groaned but didn’t get up.
“Don’t look at this,” I said to her. I’d have preferred her not being there to witness this, but I wasn’t going to let her out of my sight. “We’ve got to get you to the hospital. But first I need to do this.”
I wasn’t the sort of person who enjoyed violence; at Parker Security we were all trained in a martial art and I had specifically chosen jujitsu because I wasn’t interested in punching and kicking. But all that went out the window now. I kicked Lucas a dozen times, not just in the head but his ribcage, his lower torso, hopefully getting in a good liver shot or two. Did I feel bad at all beating an unconscious man? Hell, no! I ended with a stomp to his face, and I felt the cartilage in his nose give way underneath my foot. He wasn’t dead, but he sure as hell wouldn’t be getting up anytime soon. And when he finally did, he’d be hurtin’ for a good, long time.
Emmy came and stood next to me, staring down at him. He lay there spreadeagled, blood pooling around his head.
“He almost killed me,” she said.
“You were basically dead. You weren’t breathing and didn’t have a pulse when I got in here.”
We looked at each other, and I felt relieved to see that the color had returned to her face and that she seemed okay.
“Then he deserves this,” she said, and went over and kicked him right in the balls.
***
I wanted to carry her out of the club, just pick her up like a bride being carried over the threshold, but she insisted she could walk out of there.
“What are we going to do with him?” she asked once we stepped outside.
I kept my arm around her and pulled her close to my side. “We are not going to do anything with him,” I said. “Especially not you.” My pulse was just starting to decelerate from breakneck speed. “Let’s catch a cab to the hospital.”
She shook her head. “No, I don’t want to go to the hospital.”
“I really think we should.”
“I just... maybe... if I could sit down somewhere for a little bit, I think I’ll be okay.”
I took a deep breath. “Emmy,” I said. “When I came in there, he was strangling you. You were not breathing. You didn’t have a pulse. I think that warrants a visit to the hospital.”
“I don’t want that, though,” she said. “Because they’re going to want to know what happened, and then I’m going to have to tell them—and, really, I feel okay. I do.”
I didn’t want to force her to do something she didn’t want to. That was the last thing I wanted, in fact. “Okay,” I said finally. “Okay, we’ll go back to my place and you can lie down.” A cab was stopped at the intersection. I held my hand up once the light changed green and it came toward us.
I helped her in and gave the driver my address. She leaned against me as we got further and further from Oddlands and that asshole Lucas.
We didn’t say much as we drove, which gave me time to think about what had just happened. The adrenaline was ebbing, and where I should have been feeling relief that the situation had turned out okay, a disbelieving sort of anger was taking its place. I wasn’t mad at Emmy, but at the same time I didn’t know if she realized how close she had just come to being murdered at the hands of a perverted club owner.
It hadn’t been enough. What I had done to him back there hadn’t been enough—I should have killed him. People like that didn’t deserve to live, and no one should have to face the threat of prison for taking someone out who would assault someone like that. I had a feeling this would probably not be the last time I dealt with Lucas Oddland, but that was just fine with me—next time, maybe, I would just do it. I’d take him out.
When we got back to my place, I had Emmy lie down on the couch. I sat in the easy chair next to the couch and looked at her, looked at the bright-red marks on her neck.
“What were you thinking?” I said after a minute. “I mean, Jesus, Emmy, he could’ve killed you. You could be dead right now.”
“I’m sorry,” she said. “I knew it was a mistake once I got there, but then it was too late. He was just... he was way too strong. I tried to get away.” She lowered her eyes and I could tell how terrible she felt. She looked back up at me. “That wouldn’t have done anyone any good, now, would it?”
“No. No, not at all. You dying is not part of the plan.”
“I just wanted to get whatever name he was going to give me.”
“Honestly? He probably wasn’t going to give you a name at all. He probably just said that because he wanted to get you back here.”
“I don’t know what was going on with him and Isa, but it sounds like they had some sort of... I don’t know... sexual relationship or something?” She shuddered. “I can’t imagine Isa ever hooking up with someone like him. Do you think he forced her?”
“I don’t know. I wouldn’t put it past a guy like that. But, really, I still don’t think it would be a bad idea to go to the hospital.”
“I don’t need to go to the hospital,” she said.
“I’d really like it if you did. Just as a precaution.”
“I don’t want to make a big deal out of this. I feel fine. I’d be honest and tell you if I didn’t, but I really don’t think that we need to do that. Won’t they want to know... what happened?”
“Of course they will. And it’s pretty obvious that someone tried to strangle you.”
She reached up, her slender fingers brushing the bruises on her neck. “I am a little sore,” she said. “But I suppose that’s to be expected after something like that. Listen, if I start to feel any worse, then I’ll go get checked out, okay? But right now I don’t think that’s necessary.”
If I pushed it, I could probably get her to change her mind. But I also trusted that she knew herself, knew her body, and would be able to tell if something was amiss.
“Okay,” I said. “But you have to promise to tell me if you start to feel off.”
“I promise.” She shifted the pillow underneath her head and then sat up. “I should thank you for saving my life,” she said. “I’ve never been in that sort of situation before, where someone has saved my life.”
“I’m just glad I got there in time to do something.” The image of her lying there, lifeless, flashed in my mind, and I shook my head to clear it away. I didn’t want to think about that ever again. I went over and sat next to her, our legs touching.
Neither of us said anything for a moment. The silence was comfortable, though, as it always was with her. I wanted to ask her—was she feeling the same thing I was? Was this real? Or was I just imagining it? I didn’t know, and I wasn’t going to bring it up, but it seemed almost undeniable that there was... something between us. Something that was almost tangible, like you could reach out and grasp it. In fact, the only thing I wanted to do right then was kiss her.
I turned toward her, just a little, and she did the same, almost as if we had planned it. I leaned my head in and she didn’t move for a second, but then her head moved a little closer to mine, then a little closer still. We kept our gazes locked on each other, and it truly felt like I was looking into the eyes of someone I had known a long t
ime, forever maybe. Less than an inch separated our faces, and I leaned a little closer, my lips brushing up against hers. Her eyes closed slowly, her lashes thick against her fair skin. She inhaled slowly, and I thought about those lips, the way I had pressed my mouth against them earlier, breathed life back into her. Her lips then, though, had been pale, lifeless, nothing like now, as she slowly kissed me back. I opened my mouth a little as I felt the tip of her tongue run against my bottom lip; her own mouth opened wider and then our tongues were entwining as I brought my hands up and cupped the sides of her face.
It felt so good. I couldn’t remember the last time I’d kissed someone, and it had never felt like this. Just like the right thing to do, like this was what my body had been waiting for my entire life, I just hadn’t realized it. She sighed, and I opened my eyes just a little, and saw that hers were still closed. I moved my hands down slowly from her face, being gentle at her neck. I smoothed out the strong muscles of her shoulders, and she groaned softly.
When the kiss ended, we pulled back, but just a little bit. The tips of our noses touched, and I could feel her breath on me, warm and sweet. She licked her lips and we started to kiss again, and it was like the most beautifully choreographed dance; it felt as if my energy was melding with hers, like we were becoming one. It was almost surreal, like nothing I’d ever experienced before. I wondered if it was because it had been so long since I’d hooked up with someone. I didn’t think so, though—it was because of who she was. If she had been someone different, I was almost certain the feeling wouldn’t be the same.
I let myself fall into that kiss, like I was falling down a rabbit hole into utopia. And that utopia was being entwined in her arms, losing myself in that lush mouth of hers. She groaned softly and kissed me harder, her hands going up to the back of my head, as though she could pull me closer, deeper. My own hands moved down from her shoulders to her collarbone, lightly brushing the tops of her breasts. I wanted to bring her back to my bedroom, undress her, and make her feel as good as she deserved to feel. I wanted to explore every inch of her body.
But suddenly, there was just air where her lips had been. My eyes flew open.
She was backing up, wiping at her mouth with the back of her hand.
“I’m sorry,” she said. “I just can’t be doing this right now. My sister is missing. That’s what I’ve got to focus on. I can’t let myself get distracted by other things. I mean, how messed up is that? My sister is still missing and I’m here hooking up with someone.” She brought her hands up to either side of her face and pulled down on her cheeks. “It’s not that I’m not attracted to you,” she said softly. “That’s not it at all. But I just can’t... I can’t be doing this right now. I’ve got to get going. I feel much better; I’ll be fine to drive. I’m really fine. Please don’t worry about me.”
“Yeah, sure, okay,” I said, though I couldn’t help but feel stunned. What? Didn’t that kiss feel as incredible to her as it did to me? But maybe not, because she grabbed her purse off the coffee table and hurried out of the apartment, not even bothering to look back.
I stayed there on the couch for a long time after she left, trying to make sense of everything that had just happened. My thoughts whirred through my mind though, impossible to grab on to any one particular thing.
Maybe I had been wrong, after all. Maybe the way I felt had been completely one-sided, and kissing her like that had been taking it too far.
Chapter 14
Emmy
My head felt like it was spinning as I walked from Jason’s apartment down the hill back toward my car. Hopefully it hadn’t been towed; I couldn’t remember if I had parked at a one- or two-hour meter. And hopefully I wouldn’t run into Lucas, even though I’d parked a couple of blocks away.
People tossed cursory glances my way as they passed, and I realized they were looking at my neck. I’d need to cover that up somehow. My mother would freak out if she saw it, and rightfully so. I felt like I was on one of those tilt-a-whirl rides and my mind couldn’t grasp on to anything concrete, anything solid. My stomach flipped.
Part of this feeling was not just because of what had happened at Oddlands, not just because I’d had a near-death experience. Part of it was the fact that I’d just kissed Jason, and that for those moments it had been pure and utter bliss. I had kissed some guys before, but it had never felt like that. I couldn’t explain it, but it was like I was more than myself, or something different than myself. But I could only attain that feeling with him. The second I had pulled back and we stopped kissing, the feeling had vanished.
That wasn’t what I was supposed to be doing right now, though. My sister was missing and I was hooking up with some guy. Hadn’t I just been telling myself that I was going to be a better sister from now on? That certainly didn’t seem like a good way to start.
My senses were on high alert as I got closer to Oddlands. But what would he do, if he saw me out on the street like this? There were plenty of people around; I didn’t think that he would try to do anything.
I heard a siren approach. I continued to walk, approaching the intersection to the block where Oddlands was. There was an ambulance out front of the club, and that woman we had met there the first time was standing at the door. I wasn’t close enough to see the expression on her face, but I had a feeling she wouldn’t be entirely surprised that this had happened.
When the EMTs came out, pushing a stretcher, I did feel relieved that it wasn’t just a body under a sheet. Lucas was strapped onto the stretcher and there was an oxygen mask on his face. Even from this distance I could see the blood, but he was alive. Even though he had tried to kill me, I didn’t want him to die; I didn’t want Jason to get into trouble for that. The thought of him possibly going to prison for something he did to save me made me feel sick.
I waited until they had him loaded into the ambulance and were driving away before I went over to my car. The woman had gone back into the club, shutting the door firmly behind her. Lucas probably never had any names to give me; it seemed more likely that he’d just wanted me to come down there so he could try to sleep with me. Did he really think that it would be that easy? He certainly didn’t look like the sort of guy who had girls throwing themselves at his feet, and I still couldn’t imagine Isa ever getting with him. But it seemed like she had, and that they had some sort of arrangement that I would probably never understand.
After I started the car, I tilted the rearview mirror down slightly so I could see the lower part of my face, my neck. There were indeed red marks; I’d need to dig through my stuff and try to find some sort of light scarf or something that I could tie around my neck until they faded enough that I could cover it up with foundation. My neck was sore; my whole body was, for that matter. I thought back to kissing Jason, how it had felt so singular, so all-encompassing, like that was exactly what my body was meant to do. Any pain or discomfort I’d been feeling had all but vanished then—until I had snapped back to my senses and realized how messed up it was that I was doing this when I was supposed to be focused on finding Isa.
***
I woke up the next morning feeling sore, like I’d pushed myself too hard in a workout. Wisps of whatever dream I’d been having lingered, something about Jason, something good. It was the two of us; we’d been somewhere, somewhere tropical, just the sandy beach, the crystal water, the two of us. I ran my tongue over my lower lip, remembering what it had felt like to kiss him yesterday. I got up and went into the bathroom, splashing some cold water on my face. Walking away from him had been almost impossible.
I looked at myself in the mirror and winced at the sight of those marks on my neck as I tilted my chin back and looked from one side to the other. Back in my bedroom, I found a rose-pink silk scarf I’d gotten at a thrift store and had worn as a kerchief; I loosely tied it around my neck and decided that it looked a little strange, but not too bad. I was out rummaging through the refrigerator when the phone rang. It was Carolyn.
“Hey—”
>
“We need to talk,” she said, cutting me off. “Are you busy right now?”
“No, I’m not. Kind of slow-going over here at the moment. What’s up? Is everything okay?”
“I’ll be over in a few minutes.”
She hung up, and I stared at the phone for a moment before putting it back down. She had sounded almost a little frantic; I hoped that everything was okay. I didn’t know if I’d be able to handle another calamity.
I made coffee while I waited for her. Carolyn didn’t live too far from me, so it was maybe ten minutes later when I saw her car pull into the driveway. She rushed in.
“What’s going on?” I asked.
“Maybe you should sit down for this.” She pulled out one of the kitchen chairs and sat. “I’m going to.”
“Do you want some coffee?”
“No, thanks. Really, I think you need to sit down.”
I left my mug on the counter and sat down opposite her. “You’re kind of freaking me out,” I said. “Will you please just tell me what’s going on?” My mind started to race—had she heard something about Isa? “Carolyn—what is it?”
She took a deep breath, spreading her palms flat on the table. “You know how when you first told me about Jason, I said that he sounded familiar?”
“Yes,” I said slowly.
“Well, I couldn’t for the life of me figure out why. But I knew that I’d heard his name before. And then I realized—he was that guy on The Next Best Chef.”
“I don’t even know what that is.”
“It’s one of those reality shows that I find myself powerless to not watch.”
“Are you sure? He’s not a chef; he works at a security company.”
“Yeah, I know. But the season he was on, they did an amateur edition, where all the contestants were people that didn’t cook professionally or anything. He was on it. Jason Armstrong. He didn’t last long, but I remember him now because, you know, he’s handsome, for sure—and not long after the show aired, one of the judges accused him of sexual misconduct.”
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