Parker Security Complete Series

by Camilla Blake

  “Am I going to break this?” I asked, laughing a little, and I could hear the nervousness in my voice, which shocked me more than anything else. But maybe it shouldn’t be that surprising. I hadn’t been in a bed with a woman in a very, very long time. Gwen and I weren’t physically touching at the moment, but I could feel her presence right there next to me, knew that all I needed to do was slide my hand a little bit to the left and I would make contact, would feel the warm softness of her skin right there. I tried to push those thoughts from my mind, and instead turned my attention to the nightstand on my side of the bed, which did not hold grocery-store romance novels but several hunting and outdoor magazines.

  I picked up the top magazine, which had a picture of a guy in camo holding up a gigantic buck by the antlers. I wasn’t against hunting, but it wasn’t something I’d ever done before. It was one of those things I’d do if the need arose, but so far, the local Trader Joe’s and Safeway were still managing to keep their shelves stocked, so there wasn’t a need for me to head off into the woods and shoot some game.

  Still, I flipped through the pages as Gwen thumbed through the pages of her book. Lots of advertisements for guns, ammo, deer lure. Photographs of heavyset, bearded men showing off their latest kill. I tried not to judge; it was a lifestyle that I didn’t partake in, but plenty of people did, and there wasn’t anything wrong with that.

  After a few minutes, Gwen put her book down. “Do you think it’s funny that my aunt put romance books on this side of the table and hunting magazines on that table?”

  “A little old-fashioned, maybe. I’m not really that into hunting, I must confess. Will that disappoint her?”

  There was a part of me that did feel like I owed Grace something—she had given us some good information, and she had also been a gracious host. Just from the few things that Gwen had told me, I knew that bringing up the past like this couldn’t be all wonderful memories, and that some people, in Grace’s position, might just choose to shut down and not say another word about it.

  I returned my magazine back to its stack and then we both leaned over to turn our bedside lamps off, the room suddenly engulfed in darkness. Gwen yawned.

  “It feels really weird to be sleeping in this house again,” she said quietly. “I never thought that day would happen. I never thought I’d actually come back here. I’m glad we did, though. It really feels different now that Joshua is gone. I know that you’ve never been here before, but the whole place just has a completely different feel to it. A better feel. I had thought that maybe Grace was going to sell the place now Joshua was gone, but I don’t think she is. I think she’s going to stay, and if that’s what she wants to do, then I’m happy for her.”

  “It probably feels really liberating.” We were speaking in low voices, and it made me think of being a kid at a sleepover, long after the parents have said good night, go to sleep; maybe they’ve come back in once or twice to remind us that it was late and we needed to go to bed; the thrill of staying up way past the time you normally did.

  “I think you’re totally right. I’m beginning to realize now that Grace probably didn’t want to go along with everything that Joshua did, but she felt trapped. Which makes me feel awful, that I just left the way I did and never looked back.”

  “You can’t blame yourself, though. She’s an adult. She could have left, too.”

  “I know. But I sometimes think that it was harder for her, because she’d been part of it for so much longer than I had. Like she didn’t know another way of life. It does make me feel better, though, to see that she seems really happy now. She’s not completely adrift or lost like I might’ve thought she would be.”

  “That’s good.”

  And then we were both quiet and it would’ve been the easiest thing in the world to just reach over, to feel her smooth skin under my fingertips. I could sense her next to me, and I thought maybe she was thinking the same thing—all I have to do is reach over and I’d feel him, right there—but she didn’t make any move to do so, and neither did I. We were in her aunt’s house, after all. It would be completely inappropriate to do such a thing, despite my temptation. I would have to draw upon every ounce of my discipline, but I could do it.

  “Good night, Gwen,” I said.

  “Good night,” she replied, and I thought maybe there was a hint of disappointment in her voice, but I couldn’t tell for sure.

  Chapter 18

  Gwen

  I woke up, the only person in the bed. I had a vague memory of briefly waking up the night before, snuggled up against Drew. Or had that just been a dream? I tried harder to remember but it just made things even fuzzier.

  Drew was sitting at the kitchen table, drinking coffee. Grace was at the stove, flipping pancakes on the griddle.

  “Good news!” she said when she saw me. “Lisa got back to me with Judd’s phone number, which I wrote down on that piece of paper right there.” She nodded to a pink Post-it on the counter. “She said she told Judd that you’re interested in maybe reconnecting with him and that he said he’d be happy to hear from you.”

  “Okay. Thanks,” I said. I picked up the Post-it and looked at it. “I guess I should get in touch with him; we could head over there later today if he has the time.”

  “Sounds good,” Drew said.

  It was late, nearly ten in the morning, so I went and found my phone and texted Judd. He replied almost immediately: Today would be just fine.

  He sent along his address, and I told him that I would let him know when we were on the road, that we were at Grace’s right now.

  “I haven’t seen Judd in ages,” Grace said, setting down a big plate of pancakes. “But the pictures of his son are adorable. Lisa is so thrilled to be a grandmother.”

  “Well, he’s available to see us,” I said. I watched as Drew drizzled maple syrup over his stack of pancakes. “He says today would be fine.”

  “Great,” Drew said.

  “Now, I’m not trying to kick you out,” Grace said, “but I do have a weekly knitting group I go to at the library. It’s at eleven. I could always skip it—”

  “You don’t need to do that,” I said. “We could plan on heading over to Judd’s after we eat, and then you can go to your knitting group. I don’t want you to have to change your schedule on account of us.”

  “Oh, it wouldn’t be a problem at all. But if you guys have plans to head that way, then I might just skedaddle a little ahead of you. You’re welcome here anytime, the both of you—I know I’ve said this before, but I really mean it.”

  “Thank you so much,” Drew said. “Really. You’ve been a great host.”

  Grace beamed. “It’s been my pleasure. And I hope that maybe Judd is able to give you guys some answers.”

  After breakfast, Grace got ready to go. It really did make me happy to see her going out, living her life, enjoying things free from Joshua’s oppression. We said our goodbyes and told her we would lock the door behind us on our way out. We didn’t have much stuff to get together, so after I did a few stretches and then a couple of yoga poses in the living room, Drew and I headed out.

  Judd lived on the coast, in a little town called Albion, just south of Mendocino. It was a beautiful drive up the 1, with the Pacific Ocean sparkling to our left, the road so close to the edge at points that sometimes it felt as if we were going to tip right off.

  We found Judd’s house easily; it was a cute Craftsman-style bungalow, with a picket fence and a front porch. Drew parked in the driveway, behind a Subaru and a Volvo station wagon. Judd came out as we were getting out of the car.

  “Gwen,” he said. He looked much older than when I’d last seen him—though he was probably thinking the same thing about me. He came over but stopped short of actually giving me a hug, which was something that Joshua had not permitted between males and females, unless they were married.

  “Hi,” I said. “Thank you so much for agreeing to meet with us. I know this probably seems like quite the blast from
the past. This is my friend, Drew. Drew, this is Judd.”

  “Nice to meet you,” Drew said, and they shook hands.

  Judd turned as a woman, probably around my age, came to the door, carrying a bundle. “This is my wife, Carla.” A smile crossed his face as she came out the door. “And our son, Benjamin.”

  I shook Carla’s hand and so did Drew, and then we both smiled down at the baby, who was wrinkled and pink but somehow still very cute.

  “Congratulations,” Drew said. “Good-looking kid.”

  “I was just telling Judd that I really appreciate you guys being so gracious, agreeing to meet with us,” I said to Carla. She had light-blond hair, pulled back into a ponytail, and tired-looking eyes, which was understandable, with a new baby and all. She cast a look in Judd’s direction, and then smiled at me, though it did seem a little forced. “We won’t stay long,” I added.

  “Yeah, Judd was a bit vague about this whole thing,” Carla said. “Just that you’re someone he knew growing up?”

  “I was best friends with her cousin, Brandon,” Judd said. “Remember how I told you my parents were part of some cult for a little while? Her uncle was the leader.”

  This answer did not seem to make Carla feel any better. “Oh,” she said. “Well, I’m going to go put Benjamin down for his nap. He’s still in that stage where he sleeps most of the day. I’ll let you guys have your conversation in private.”

  “It doesn’t have to be private,” Judd said. “You’re more than welcome to be a part of it.”

  “I’m probably just going to try to get some sleep too. It was nice to meet both of you.”

  Judd leaned in to give her a quick kiss before she went back into the house, but she didn’t pause long enough for him to do so, and he missed and ended up kissing the air. I tried to pretend I didn’t notice the sudden awkwardness that had settled around us, and the three of us stood there for a moment, not saying anything until Carla had returned to the house.

  “Don’t mind her,” Judd said. “We’re both still adjusting to being parents. You guys don’t have children, do you?”

  “No,” Drew said quickly. “No children.”

  “Everyone tells you how much it’s going to change your life, but you don’t really realize just how much until it’s happened.” Judd turned and looked toward the house. “Why don’t we sit out on the deck,” he said. “That way we don’t have to worry about waking the baby up. Follow me.”

  Instead of going through the house, we walked around and followed Judd onto a large deck that overlooked a nicely landscaped backyard with fruit trees and a flower garden.

  “So, Gwen,” he said as we sat down, “I have to say, it was quite a surprise to hear from you after all these years.”

  “I know.”

  “You look good, though. It looks like life has been treating you well. Where is it that you ended up, after taking off in such dramatic fashion?”

  “San Francisco.”

  “Ah. So you didn’t make it very far.”

  “Just far enough. Joshua never found me.”

  “That’s good. I doubt you’d be sitting here right now if he had. I doubt you’d be sitting anywhere.”

  “What do you mean by that?” Drew said. “Do you think he would’ve killed her if he’d found her?”

  Judd paused and looked at Drew for a moment before answering. “I take it, then, you’ve never met him before.”

  “No, I haven’t.”

  “I didn’t think so; I don’t remember you. Not to say that I remember every face that ever walked through the Lillies’ door. But... Joshua, as I’m sure Gwen has told you, wasn’t the sort of person who liked to be disobeyed. Which I guess made him the perfect candidate to lead some sort of cult masquerading as a religious group. But yes, I think he probably would have killed her. The same way I always thought he would’ve killed Brandon, if he ever found him. But I don’t think he was successful in that regard, either. I guess it was good that Joshua decided to be a cult leader and not a detective.”

  “It sounds like you were around there a lot,” Drew said.

  Judd nodded. “I was. Just ask Gwen.”

  “It’s true.” I did have plenty of memories of Judd; he and Brandon were inseparable for a while, and I would always want to tag along with them. Neither of them ever seemed to mind—a fact I’d always appreciated.

  “Do you remember ever meeting a girl named Ashleigh Parker? She’s about five feet eight; her natural hair color is light brown but it was probably dyed some color, like pink or purple, and cut pretty short. Maybe spiked.”

  Judd shook his head. “No,” he said. “I definitely would have remembered someone who fit that description.”

  “You never saw anyone like that?” I pressed. It was hard for me to believe that Ashleigh and Brandon were together if Judd knew nothing about her—would Brandon really keep that a secret, even from his best friend? How would that even be possible, unless he and Ashleigh hardly ever saw each other? “Do you ever remember Brandon sneaking away or anything?”

  “Sneaking away? No. Who is this Ashleigh person?”

  “She’s my sister,” Drew said. “And she also disappeared, around the same time that Brandon did, which makes us think that they left together. This is all new to me; I had always assumed she’d been taken against her will.”

  “Did you discover something new?”

  “Yes.” Drew glanced at me. “After Joshua died, Gwen went back to help her aunt clean out the house and she found my sister’s journal in Joshua’s closet. It would seem that the person we all thought Ashleigh was going out with was not actually her boyfriend, and someone else—whose name was redacted every single time it was mentioned—was in fact the person she was in a relationship with.”

  Judd let out a low whistle. “This sounds pretty serious.”

  “But we don’t know for sure who the redacted name is. There’s no way we can tell. Someone—we assume Joshua—went over it with a black Sharpie and it’s impossible to read.”

  “It sounds like something out of some psychological-thriller movie.”

  “Can you think of anyone else who might know anything?” I asked. “Again, I know how weird it is for us to just show up like this, after all these years.”

  “I understand,” Judd said. “It’s one of those things that just stays with you. Trust me—I’d love to see Brandon again. Just to have a conversation with him. Maybe yell at him a little bit for taking off and not telling me a single detail. But... life goes on, too, and we’ve just got to keep living. I hope that’s what he’s doing, wherever he is.” Judd frowned. “You know who you might want to talk to? And the only reason I mention him is because someone posted a GoFundMe link on Facebook because he’s having some health problems... is Skip Sheldon.”

  I froze at the name. That had been someone I hadn’t thought of in a long time. As a child, I had referred to him as “Uncle Skip” even though he wasn’t an uncle, just a close friend of Joshua’s. Pretty much his right-hand man, the sort of person whose bad side you wouldn’t want to be on.

  “Skip,” I said. “I’m not sure Skip would be able to shed any light on this.”

  “My parents still stay in touch with him, though I do not.” Judd shrugged. “Just trying to think of leads for you. I could get you his contact info pretty quick, if you want. He’s actually only about an hour east of here. Might not be a bad idea to talk with him. He’s mellowed out in his old age, too, at least according to my parents. Having health issues can really put things into perspective. Make you realize you’re not as hot shit as you once thought you were.”

  “Sure,” Drew said before I could respond. “Why don’t you give us his contact info?” He glanced at me. “We don’t have to use it. Or maybe I could talk to him, if you don’t want to.”

  Judd pulled his phone out of his pocket and called his mom. “Hi, Mom,” he said. “Oh, yes, she’s sitting right here as a matter of fact. I know; it is like a little reunion. Hey, liste
n, I was wondering if you could give me Skip Sheldon’s phone number. No, I don’t have it. Yeah, I’m ready.” He pulled the phone away from his ear and put it on speaker, typing in the digits his mother recited.

  “Judd!” she screeched. “All I can hear is you pressing buttons!”

  “Sorry,” he said. He turned the speaker off and put the phone back up to his ear. “Thanks, Mom. Yes, I’ll send you some more pictures, but not right now. He’s doing great—just taking a nap. Okay, I will. Bye.”

  He hung up and then tapped at the phone screen. “I just texted you Skip’s number and his address,” he said. “Mom says you should just drop by, that he’ll be there, but I figure you’ll probably want to call him.”

  I glanced at Drew. “What do you think?” I asked. “An hour east from here. You feel like making that drive?”

  “I’m fine with that. I got in touch with one of Ryan’s friends, Sebastian, who lives down in Point Arena, which we passed on our way up here. But he’s out of town until tomorrow, so the timing might actually work out pretty well if we went to see this guy, Skip. If you think it’s worth it—which I’m getting the feeling that you don’t totally feel is the case.”

  “It’s not that.” I wasn’t quite sure how to explain it. Seeing Skip might be, in a way, like seeing Joshua again. Yes, they were different people, but as a kid, they had often seemed like the same person. Though it was always abundantly clear that Joshua was the one calling the shots, Skip was more than happy to go along with it. But I also had wisps of memory of Brandon talking with Skip, or helping him change the oil on the truck, or stack cords of wood after they chopped down a tree. I had never asked Brandon about it, but he and Skip did have a relationship, and maybe it was possible that Brandon confided in him. He probably felt like he couldn’t really confide in Joshua, so maybe he sought out another guy to talk to.

  I got up and walked around the side yard to call Skip. Strangely, I didn’t feel that nervous as the phone rang, and when he picked up, I knew it was him instantly.