03 - Three Odd Balls

by Cindy Blackburn

  “Nope. But Densmore will. I told him to figure out who she really is, come hell or high water.”

  “And who else is the talented Lieutenant still investigating? Bethany, I assume?”

  “Nope. I changed my mind about Bethany.”

  I turned from the sea to face Wilson. “Why’s that?”

  “I’ve been too hard on her. At the luau tonight Emi confirmed what Densmore told me earlier about all three of those girls.”

  I cringed. “You didn’t actually have Densmore look into Emi Ulii?”

  “You bet I did. As you would say, Chris is smitten with her. So Densmore checked her out.”

  “You don’t trust anyone, do you?”

  “Nope. Densmore found the high school connection—Emi, Makaila, and Bethany—but there’s nothing there.”

  “Alas, no sinister Hula Club connection?”

  He chuckled. “All three of them were good kids in high school and ever since.”

  “But Bethany lied to Chris about who fired Derrick Crowe,” I argued. “And she knew how to make a Pele’s Melee.” I nodded meaningfully. “She was sleeping with Davy, correct?”

  “Maybe, but you heard what Gail told us—Bethany’s smart. She probably watched Davy make so many pink drinks, she caught on by osmosis.”

  “But if Bethany was sleeping with Davy,” I persisted, “and now we know that Rachel was engaged to him?”

  “We don’t know either of those things for a fact.”

  Ah, the pesky fact factor. My beau the cop is such a stickler in that regard.

  “I can’t believe you’re dismissing your prime suspect at this critical juncture, Wilson.” I drew a love triangle in the sand to illustrate my argument and pointed to each corner. “Bethany, Rachel, and Davy,” I insisted.

  Wilson pointed to each corner. “Carmen, Ki and Davy,” he said and reminded me that just the previous night Ki had been my prime suspect. “And with what Densmore learned about Carmen’s kids? Think about it, Jessie.”

  I conceded that Carmen had good cause to be a bit angry at Davy. “And a possible inheritance from his estate would be a powerful motive.”

  “For Carmen and for Ki. And then there’s the Ki-Vega connection.”

  “Excuse me?”

  “I’m not sure, but Denmore’s checking into it. Why is Vega refusing to even look at the owners or the staff at the Wacky Gardens?” Wilson didn’t wait for an answer. “Vega said something earlier that bugged me.”

  “Vega says a lot of things that bug you.”

  “He called me Sherlock.”

  My face dropped. “Ki calls you Sherlock.”

  “Bingo.” Wilson offered one of his meaningful cop-like looks. “It’s a common enough expression. But.”

  “So you think Vega and Ki are friends, maybe?” I did the deductive reasoning thing. “So Vega may be protecting Ki? Like some sort of conspiracy?”

  “It’s possible. But let’s see what Densmore finds out before jumping to conclusions.” He patted my knee. “And in the meantime, let’s check out Davy Atwell’s place.”

  I nodded eagerly. “We’ll take the Beyond the Beach tour tomorrow.”

  “Maybe, but let’s do our Nancy Drew and Ned imitation first. We’ll get directions from Louise and you can drive me over to the mansion.”

  I squinted. “What are you up to, Captain Rye?”

  “I need to get into that house, Jessie. See what I can find.”

  “Oh, my Lord,” I hissed. “Are you actually thinking of breaking in?”

  He grinned. “Didn’t Nancy Drew ever break into a house?”

  I looked up at the almost full moon and laughed out loud. “Let me guess—you know all about how to pick a lock, disconnect burglar alarms, et cetera, et cetera.”

  He shrugged modestly, and it occurred to me, yet again, that there was a lot about this man I did not know. “Did Dianne Calloway teach you how to be a criminal?” I asked.

  Wilson lost the grin. “What?”

  “I don’t know what, Wilson. But Vega mentioned something about you protecting her. So I’m thinking maybe she was a criminal of some sort.”

  Wilson glared at me until I again reminded him I did not know what I was talking about. Then he poked his head into his Shynomore sack and pulled out one of the shirts he had purchased on our way home from the Primrose Tower.

  He held it up to the moonlight. “I like this one the best.”

  I took stock of the assortment of Dr. Seuss characters. “You’re trying to change the subject.”

  “Yep.”

  Chapter 19

  “Urquit Snodgrass truly is evil, isn’t he?” Mother asked.

  “Downright dastardly.” I looked up from my breakfast and winked at Louise. “You’ll be happy to know he’s finally kidnapped her.”

  Louise gasped. “Delta Touchette? What? When? Where? How? Tell me, tell me, tell me!”

  “At the Goochie Leoia Gorge,” Mother told her and then repeated herself. “Goochie Lee-O-I-A. Did I say it right?” I nodded as she continued scrolling down my computer screen and explaining, “Just like Jessie mentioned yesterday. He kidnapped Delta while she was taking her morning bath.”

  Wilson put down his fork. “Snotgrass actually nabbed her naked?”

  “Snodgrass,” Mother corrected him.

  “And of course not,” I said. “Delta might be a daring adventuress, but she is still quite modest. She wasn’t likely to let the evil villain see her naked for very long.”

  Mother giggled as she read further. “Very clever, Jessie.” She stopped reading to enlighten Wilson. “Despite her harrowing night all alone in the jungle, Delta Touchette has kept her wits about her.”

  “And bathing in the clear blue waters of the Goochie Leoia Gorge has revived her considerably,” I added. “So she’s very alert.”

  “There now, you see?” Mother reached a fork over to nab a bite of my pancakes.

  Wilson shook his head. “I can’t believe I’m asking this—but see what?”

  “Delta, of course,” Tessie said after swallowing. “She could just feel Urquit Snodgrass’s eyes upon her when she was attending her morning toilette, so she ever so quickly hopped out of the pool on the farther bank and wrapped herself in a leaf.”

  Wilson blinked twice. “Did you just say, leaf?”

  “A big huge tropical leaf,” I elaborated. I pointed to a few examples in the garden surrounding the breakfast patio, and then at some sort of vine-twine stuff hanging from the nearest tree. “And then she used a vine like that one and fashioned a belt to hold the thing on.” I tapped my chin and pictured Delta. “She looks quite fetching, actually.”

  “I am sure she looks fantastical!” Louise interjected. “Very, very, very sexy!”

  Wilson groaned and went back to his pancakes as Tessie summarized the actual kidnapping scene for Louise’s edification.

  Duly intrigued, my agent fretted about Skylar Staggs. “He must arrive to save Delta soon, Jessica! That leaf, no matter how large, isn’t going to deter Urquit Snodgrass for very long!”

  I looked up from the last of my pancakes. “Louise,” I scolded. “Exactly how many of my books have you read by now? Do you really think Adelé Nightingale would ever allow any of her heroines to be violated by the bad guy?”

  She sat back and considered. “Good point,” she said. “And I do apologize for doubting you.” She wiped her brow in a motion reminiscent of the distressed Delta Touchette herself. “I’m just so worried about poor Bee Bee, I can’t think straight. Where oh where can he be?”

  I exchanged a meaningful look with Wilson, and then with my mother. They both nodded encouragement.

  I took a deep breath. “Umm, Louise,” I began as Tessie reached over to take her hand. “We have a theory about Bee Bee’s disappearance that, umm, maybe you should know about.” I cringed, and Louise’s face dropped. In fact, she looked like she was about to cry.

  “You think he’s dead, don’t you?”

  “No, no,
no, no,” I hastened to reassure her and explained the basic kidnapping idea while Mother patted her hand and mumbled a few “There-theres.”

  Louise swallowed a sob. “So you think the killer kidnapped Bee Bee?”

  “Bee Bee heard something important that night,” Mother said. “The killer needs to keep him quiet, doesn’t he?”

  “This guy—this person—has gone wacko,” Wilson added. “Think about it, Louise. They returned the knife to the kitchen for no good reason. And they’re hiding the stupid bird.”

  Louise sipped her coffee and thought about it. “But Bee Bee isn’t stupid,” she said in a surprisingly calm voice. “That’s why they’re hiding him.” She put down her cup and sat forward. “But!” she said loudly, and we all jumped.

  “But what?” we asked.

  “But where are they hiding him? Where, where, where!? Bee Bee would make far too much noise anywhere inside. Sooo.” Her eyes darted back and forth around the patio. “So the killer must have hidden him out there!” She pointed toward the volcano and turned to me. “We need to go out there and find him, Jessica!”

  “We?” I squeaked. “Out there?” I cringed. “In, like, the wilderness?”

  “Yes, we! Yes, out there!” Louise waved her hands around the breakfast table. “All of us need to go, except maybe Tessie. There must be all kinds of places to search.” She again indicated the big, bad, bug-infested wilderness. “Caves, caverns, nooks, crannies!”

  I appealed to Wilson to save me. “Umm, we have some other plans for the day. Don’t we, Wilson?”

  “Our plans can wait.” He spoke to me, but he was watching Louise, who looked like she might start crying again. “But we’ll get a lot further without Jessie,” he added, and I breathed a sigh of relief. “We don’t want her with us, slowing us down and screaming bloody murder at every bug and cobweb.”

  “Jessie gets the heebie jeebies,” Mother explained. “I’m afraid she wouldn’t be helpful at all.”

  “She’d be useless,” Wilson added.

  “Useless,” Mother agreed.

  “Useless?” Louise repeated in case someone hadn’t yet caught on.

  I rolled my eyes. “I’m not that bad.”

  “Yes you are,” my mother and my beau said in unison.

  “We’ll bring Chris,” Wilson announced, summarily dismissing my would-be contributions to the effort. “The kid’s got better eyesight and hearing than the rest of us put together. If Bee Bee’s out there, Chris will find him.”

  Mother shook her head. “No, Wilson honey. Chris has plans to go free-boarding with Emi today.”

  “Free-boarding?” I asked. “What is that, even?”

  “It’s suicidal, is what it is.” Faye approached our table with a fresh pot of coffee. “They hook their surfboards up to a boat like waterskiing. My kids swear it’s not as dangerous as it looks, but I can’t watch.” She topped off a few cups and turned to Wilson. “And your son was out late at the Holiday Hula last night, right? I hope he’s resting up.”

  “He is,” Mother assured us. “He got in very late last night after walking Emi home. He told me he’d sleep in this morning before his lesson. I understand Emi’s quite accomplished at this free-boarding skill.”

  “Better your kid than mine,” Faye said ominously as Wilson handed her his empty plate.

  He glanced at Louise. “So it’s just us and the Kekipi Crater.”

  I looked up at Faye and waved an index finger back and forth between Wilson and Louise. “Speaking of suicidal, these two are going off into the wilderness in search of Bee Bee.”

  “Buster will be glad to hear it. The poor guy’s been worried sick.” Faye gathered the rest of our plates and wandered off toward The Big House.

  “Give me a minute to go get my hiking boots, and I’ll meet you by the Christmas tree,” Wilson told Louise. He stood up but remembered to bend down and kiss me. “And we’ll take our little excursion later on?” he whispered in my ear.

  I pretended to pout. “Maybe then I won’t be so useless.”

  He reminded me I really did not want to go hiking. “But here’s something you can do.” He reached into his pocket and handed me his cell phone. “I’m expecting a phone call.”

  “Densmore?” I mouthed.

  Wilson jerked a thumb volcano-ward. “There’s no signal up there. You’ll take a message?”

  I assured him I would, and he wandered off in the direction of Paradise. Louise and Mother were staring at me when I turned back to the table.

  “What are you two up to now?” Louise asked.

  “Silly Louise,” Mother said. “They’re still sleuthing, aren’t they?”

  I reminded Louise that she, too, was sleuthing. “If Bee Bee’s a witness and you find him on this hike of yours, you’ll be a hero.”

  Louise pursed her lips. “Do you think I should have mentioned to your paramour that I’ve never actually been hiking?” She tore her gaze from the volcano. “Hiking’s kind of like swimming and driving for me.”

  “Oh, but look how well you’re doing at both of those things,” Mother said encouragingly and I rolled my eyes.

  “I don’t even own a pair of hiking boots,” Louise confessed. “What should I wear, Jessica?”

  I pointed to my useless self. “You’re asking me?”

  Apparently she was, so I told her to avoid anything she had gotten at one of her fancy Manhattan shoe stores.

  “How about sneakers?” Mother suggested. “Didn’t you bring anything with traction?”

  “My running shoes.” Louise stood up and faced the Kekipi Crater. “If Delta Touchette can face the sinister Urquit Snodgrass barefoot and wrapped in nothing but a leaf, surely I can go hiking in my Nikes!”

  She ran off in search of her shoes, and I rolled my eyes yet again.

  ***

  “To Bee Bee,” Mother said and clanked her coffee cup against mine.

  I pursed my lip and studied the old gal. “Did Christopher Rye visit your bed again last night, Mother?”

  “It wasn’t like that!”

  “I know that. But I still don’t understand what the two of you find to talk about night after night.”

  “I told you, Jessie. We talk about you and Wilson.”

  “And?” I asked. “Has Chris divulged his father’s deep dark secrets?”

  Mother sighed dramatically. “That poor, sweet, darling man.”

  “What?” I said. “Please tell me. Pleeeease?”

  She shook her head. “Didn’t we agree you should ask Wilson about this yourself?”

  “I did ask him. And he agreed he would tell me everything. But not until our vacation is over.” I sat back and slumped. “How annoying is that?”

  Mother patted my hand and stood up. “Patience, Jessie.” She wished me luck getting Delta out of her current predicament and tottered off toward Misty Breezes bungalow. “I’ll be resting on my porch if you or Skylar Staggs need any advice,” she called over her shoulder.

  I frowned at the cluster of massive poinsettia bushes stationed at the edge of the patio. Yep, I thought, annoying about sums it up. Not only was my mother ignoring my plight, but Faye had also disappeared, and was completely neglecting my empty coffee cup. Wilson and Louise had forgotten about me, too. Deep in conversation about their impending Bee Bee-hunting expedition, neither of them gave me the slightest notice as they passed by the table.

  “Buster will have some ideas of where we should start,” Wilson was saying to Louise.

  “Where, where, where?” she repeated and followed him into The Big House.

  Chapter 20

  Eleanor Touchette sat down and had herself a good cry.

  Alarmed and stunned, Skylar Staggs stood before her, trying to understand what he had said to upset the lady so. He rocked from foot to foot until Eleanor finally looked up. She apologized for her unmannerly greeting, but when Skylar reached out and tentatively offered her his handkerchief, the woman sobbed even more.

  Poor Skylar was ag
ain at a loss. For the lawman of Port Mekipii Hui was unaccustomed to provoking this kind of reaction from any woman, no matter her age. Hoping for the moment to pass, he stood silently and stared at the portrait of a young girl hanging over the mantle.

  Eventually Eleanor Touchette did get hold of herself. She sat up straight and invited Mr. Staggs to join her on the settee. She even composed herself enough to enquire as to why he was back on Ebony Island so soon after escorting her niece over.

  “The Pirate of Diamond Island,” he answered. And at the risk of provoking another emotional outburst from the older woman, he reported that an unseemly and degenerate-looking man had been spotted lugging large canvas satchels of who knows what into the jungles of Ebony Island.

  Actually, Skylar did have a theory about what was in those satchels. “Gold,” he said. Gold and jewels—ill-gotten gains from a recent robbery back at Port Mekipii Hui.

  Eleanor Touchette let out another sob and gazed up at the portrait of the beautiful little girl. Skylar looked also, and it finally dawned on him who the child was—Delta Touchette, of course! He asked how the younger Miss Touchette was enjoying her visit to the South Seas, only to have the older Miss Touchette resume wailing. Skylar braced himself and again wondered out loud what the trouble was.

  “Delta!” Eleanor cried between many sighs and tears. And with much wringing of hands, she finally explained what was upsetting her so.

  “You mean, she’s out there!” Skylar jumped to his feet and hastened to the parlor window as Eleanor mumbled something about Delta’s quest to find the ferocious jungle monster.

  How ridiculous, he thought to himself. But even if the supposed Monster of Ebony Island didn’t interest him, Delta Touchette certainly did. Skylar stared out the window and harkened back to sailing the seas with the lovely and rather forward young lady by his side. Oh, but she was a feisty one! And when that storm had almost destroyed his sailing vessel? The brave and daring damsel had taken it in her stride, and despite her lack of experience, had handled the rigs and ropes most proficiently. In fact, he never would have been able to right his ship without her assistance.