The Rancher's Twins

by Carol Ross

  Behind her, laughter rang out, and Matt said, “Wow, you’re either a really great teacher or she’s a superfast learner, huh, Jon?”

  CHAPTER THIRTEEN

  THE RIDE WAS SCENIC, and exhilarating at moments where the trail snaked along the edge of the river. But her horse was a pro and Lydia relaxed into the saddle better than she’d dared hope. No surprise, the company was entertaining with the Carnes siblings teasing and insulting each other. Zach pointed out landmarks and relayed interesting tidbits to Lydia. Jon kept casting her sidelong glances and she wondered what he was thinking. She hoped that maybe, finally, she had a ranching skill he’d approve of.

  On the way back, she allowed the others to get ahead of her and Jon. Where the trail led out of the brush into the open field, she halted her horse and dismounted. She could see the barn just over the rise.

  As Jon stopped beside her, nerves left her trembly and a little breathless. She briefly considered moving on but wanted to have a private word with him. She needed to know what he’d decided and if he’d be placing a call to Eileen.

  “Wow,” she said. “That was fun. Can I talk to you for a minute?”

  Jon dismounted and faced her. Lydia felt her spirits plummet. He was wearing his grim rancher face. Trout darted off to chase a squirrel.

  “I’m glad you enjoyed it.”

  “You don’t look happy.”

  “I wonder why that is?”

  “I’m wondering, too. What did I do this time?”

  He exhaled a breath like he was trying to hold on to his patience. “It’s more like what you can do that has me in this state.”

  “What does that mean?”

  “You can ride.” The compliment warmed her even though it sounded a bit like an accusation.

  “A little, but it’s been a long time.”

  “More than a little, Lydia. You ride very well. How long has it been?”

  “Roughly thirteen years.”

  “You let me give you instructions and make a fool of myself.”

  “I didn’t mean to. I appreciated all of the advice.”

  “You told me you didn’t ride.”

  She pointed a cautious finger at him. “If you think back, I never said that. You asked but I didn’t answer. You assumed, and I didn’t correct you because it had been a long time.”

  He muttered under his breath.

  “I’m confused about why this has you so upset. I’m sorry I didn’t tell you. I didn’t know it would all come back to me like this.”

  “Don’t apologize to me,” he snapped. And then cursed. “You need to stop apologizing when you haven’t done anything wrong.”

  “But you’re mad at me.”

  Taking a step closer, he softened his tone. “Lydia, I am not mad at you. I’m mad at myself. Beyond angry. I’m seeing red. And stars. Red flashing stars.”

  “I don’t understand. Why would you be that angry with yourself?”

  Shaking his head, he stared over her shoulder for a few long seconds. His eyes met hers again and the intensity shooting from the gray depths almost made her flinch. “For hiring you. For letting you stay these two weeks. I never should have agreed to it. I should have given you money for a hotel and sent you away that first night.”

  Lydia grimaced. When she’d worked at the bakery, she’d once been hit from behind with a twenty-pound bag of flour thrown from a truck. It had knocked her to the ground. That didn’t even compare to this kind of pain. Tears pooled in her eyes. Blinking them away, she tried to speak but her throat was on fire.

  She rasped, “I’m sor—” And then swallowed down the sorry she was going to utter. Pointing toward the barn, she turned away. “I should go.”

  Jon curled his fingers around her wrist. “Wait, please.” When she faced him, he let go of her and took a small step back. “You’re nothing like I assumed. I thought you were a spoiled, snobby shopaholic like my ex. I thought... But you’re not. At all.” Squeezing his eyes shut, he inhaled a deep breath before opening them again. “You’re so much worse.”

  Lydia couldn’t speak past the emotions constricting her lungs—anger and sadness and disappointment, and yes, there was a little fear there, too, because what was she going to do? Where was she going to go? But way beyond that, and so much more painful, was how was she going to leave the girls? She had so much she wanted to teach them, do with them, see them accomplish. She wasn’t ready to say goodbye to them or to Jon. Hot tears flooded her eyes.

  Her voice was a breathy whisper. “So, this is it? You’re firing me?”

  Removing his hat, he tossed it aside. One lightning-quick step brought him right into her space. She gasped as his arms went around her and he buried his face in her neck. “No, heaven help me, Lydia. I’m not firing you. I’m kissing you.”

  Then his lips were on hers and Lydia melted against him. She was struck with the thought that he kissed like he did everything else. He was confident, bossy and so expert at it she could barely stand it.

  When he moved like he was going to pull away, she slipped one hand behind his neck. He groaned against her mouth and kissed her again deeply.

  After not nearly long enough he ended the kiss but stayed where he was. Cheek resting against her temple, Lydia liked how he sounded as out of breath as she felt. Angling his head, he trailed his lips across her cheek to her neck. He paused and she could hear him inhale a deep breath.

  Shifting, she hugged him tighter and he made a sound like a cross between a growl and moan. Urging his lips back to hers, she kissed him this time. And for a moment, Lydia glimpsed a world, a feeling, she’d never dared dream existed.

  The high-pitched squeal of a child’s laughter brought Lydia back to her senses like a good hard shake. Placing a hand on Jon’s chest, she gave him a little shove. “Oh, no! What are we doing? That’s Abby.”

  Jon took a quick step back. Eyes wide, he stuttered, “I—” And gave his head a little shake. “I have no idea. The girls... You’re the nanny. We can’t do this. I don’t want to confuse them or have them thinking—”

  “Don’t.” Lydia lifted one hand stop-sign style. A bubble of panic welled up within her, flooding her bloodstream with adrenaline. “Of course we can’t. And right now, we need to get back. The girls are probably exhausted, and I don’t want them having a meltdown for the Carneses.”

  Nodding, he raked a hand through his messy hair. His expression suggested he was as flummoxed as she was. “You’re right. You’re going to have your hands full tomorrow as it is.”

  “Tomorrow?” Lydia repeated. Despite her churning emotions, the meaning behind that word sunk into her like a dip in a nice warm bath. Was it fair to bring this up when he was clearly still reeling from what had just happened? But then again, so was she. “Wait. Does this mean you’re not firing me? I can stay?”

  Jon snatched his hat up from the ground and settled it back on his head. “Even though we’ve just complicated matters exponentially...yes, this means I’m not letting you go.” He paused and gave her a look that sent heat all the way through her.

  Then he grinned. “At least not until the girls head off to college.”

  * * *

  SILENTLY, THEY RODE back to the barn. The implications of what he’d done and said sank in and Jon called himself an idiot in about a hundred and one different ways. He needed to handle this carefully. First, he needed to figure out what “this” was exactly. He knew he wanted Lydia to stay. That didn’t have anything to do with the kiss. He’d already made that decision before he’d kissed her. Which should have been the hundred and second reason not to kiss her, you idiot.

  She’s the nanny.

  Why had he kissed her? That was the question plaguing him. He was attracted to her. Obviously. He’d known that almost from the beginning. But it wasn’t that. It was all of it, all the ways he’d expected her to fail when
she’d succeeded. Being amazing with the girls was at the top of the list. Excelling at her other nanny duties was a bonus. The ranching chores hadn’t intimidated her; she’d cared for the chickens and the goats in a pair of sandals for more than a week. Without one single word of complaint. She truly seemed to love it here and she was seamlessly transitioning into country life like she’d been born to it.

  Jon realized now that riding had been the moment he’d expected to see her shortcomings, and if she didn’t fail, then at least show her true colors. He realized now how desperately he’d wanted her to succeed, or at least to enjoy it. When he’d seen her climb on that horse and take off, he’d been struck silly with a different kind of wanting. He wanted Lydia. It seemed that underlying, persistent yearning for a life he couldn’t have was back. And now that he’d seen all that she had to offer, now that he’d tasted those lips, how in the world was he going to stuff that wanting back where it belonged? The fact was, he didn’t really want to.

  Zach had been right when he pointed out that he and Sofie had made it work. Maybe...?

  The ringtone coming from his phone told him Katie was calling. He slid the phone from his pocket and answered it. “Hey, Katie. What’s up?”

  “Jon, thank goodness I reached you. I’m sorry. I know it’s Easter Sunday. I didn’t know they were coming today. I gave some of the guys the day off it being Easter and all.”

  “Are Big E and Zoe back?”

  “What? No. Jon...” Katie paused. “I think you need to accept the notion that Big E isn’t coming back anytime soon. I’m talking about the piglets.”

  “The piglets? For the petting zoo?”

  “Yep. They’re here and the pen isn’t finished. You know what pigs are like—if I don’t get something secure set up for them we’ll have pigs running around all over the place.” It was common knowledge that it took some strategic construction to properly secure pigs. They were smart as well as expert diggers.

  Jon sighed. “Unfortunately, I do. I thought the guys we hired were supposed to be done with it by now.”

  “They haven’t been back for the last three days. One of them texted and said they were taking a long weekend for Easter. It started on Thursday.”

  Jon huffed out an irritated breath. “Okay. I’ll be there as soon as I can. I’m out at the Carneses’ so it shouldn’t take me long.” The Carnes place was closer to his grandfather’s than the JB Bar was. “I just need to round up the girls.”

  “Oh, good. I’d love to see them and no doubt they’d love to see the piglets and meet Henry and Edna.”

  She was gone before Jon could ask who Henry and Edna were.

  * * *

  BACK AT THE BARN, Jon briefly explained the situation to Zach and Matt. Lydia was waiting with Brenna, Tess and the girls near a corral, where a cowboy was working with a foal. The three men joined them.

  Jon said, “Gen and Abby, do you want to go over to Big E’s with me? Katie has some piglets she wants to show you.”

  “Heck, yeah, we do!” Gen answered, dancing around.

  Abby said, “Uncle Ethan says pigs are real smart. They’re clean, too. And you know how people say you sweat like a pig? Uncle Ethan says that’s bogus. Pigs can’t even sweat at all.”

  Jon looked at his nanny. She flashed him a bright smile. Tendrils of hair had come loose from her ponytail. Her cheeks were a little pink but he didn’t know if that was caused by him or the sun. He thought she looked flustered, maybe even a bit dazed. He liked the idea that he’d done that to her, shaken her composure. She looked even more beautiful than normal, if that was possible. Despite his misgivings and 102 reasons, a lightness unfurled inside his chest and spread through his limbs. What would it be like to wake up to a smile like that every day? To kiss her all the time? When her brow nudged upward, he realized he’d been studying her a little too long.

  Clearing his throat, he went on, “Lydia, Zach said he’d give you a ride back to the ranch. I’m not sure how late we’ll be. I need to finish building a pen for the pigs.”

  Her smile slipped.

  Zach spoke up. “I texted Sofie. She gave me the green light to head over and help you, Jon.”

  “Absolutely not, Zach. It’s Easter. Matt’s here. Enjoy your family time. I would appreciate it if you could take Lydia home, though, when she’s ready.”

  Zach and Lydia started talking at the same time. “Excuse me, Zach.” Lydia held up a hand, then looked at Jon. “Can’t I just go with you guys? Don’t you need someone to watch the girls? I wouldn’t mind taking a peek at those piglets myself.”

  Zach patted a horse as Dale, who’d helped earlier, led him away. “I’m going, too.”

  “Yeah, me too,” Matt chimed in. “Three of us, we’ll get it done so much faster. Then we can all enjoy a little family time.”

  “That’s right.” Zach clapped his hands together. “No time for arguing, Jon. Burning daylight. Let’s go.”

  They all headed back to the house. After issuing quick thank-yous and goodbyes to the Carneses, Jon, Lydia, Trout and the girls were in the pickup. Lydia turned on the DVD the girls had been watching on the way and they slipped on their headphones.

  “This is where you grew up, right?” Lydia asked from the passenger seat. She’d been asking him about places, quizzing him about the various landmarks, houses and ranches they passed.

  “Yes, ma’am.”

  “And it’s a cattle ranch like yours?”

  “Yep. Well, it’s like mine in that it’s a cattle ranch. Mine are a heritage breed called Devons and Big E has Angus. Like I mentioned before, I go about it a little differently. I’m all organic, where Big E is more traditional. That’s what prompted me to build my own place.”

  He glanced at Lydia and realized she was waiting for him to continue. Feeling self-conscious, he tapped a thumb on the steering wheel. “Growing up, I didn’t like the way so many of our cows needed assistance with labor. More money can be made in producing calves that are larger at birth and grow fast. I don’t know when I learned about it exactly, but as I got older I realized that it hadn’t always been that way. Cows used to have their babies with only occasional assistance. Larger, unnaturally large calves mean more problems. On some ranches, all the cows need help.

  “And most cattle end up in feedlots, where the conditions can be atrocious. On the JB Bar, other than some occasional bovine midwifery—” he paused to give her a wink “—it’s all-natural births and no feedlots. There’s a great and growing market these days for natural production methods and grass-fed beef. My way is healthier and more nutritious.”

  Lydia nodded. “I’ve been watching videos and reading about cattle ranching. The footage from some of those feedlots brought tears to my eyes. The filth, the disease, and then the antibiotics and hormones they shoot them up with...? All I can say is, I don’t plan on eating any beef but grass-fed for the rest of my life. And I wish the same for your girls.”

  He shot her an approving look. “These are points on which Big E and I could not agree. Every time I suggested anything that could conceivably affect his profit margin in a negative way, it turned into an argument. We would argue around and around. Eventually, I realized that I couldn’t win. Ever. One day, I had enough. I walked off to start my own ranch. Big E did make a change in breeds over the past few years, which in my opinion, is a big step in the right direction.”

  Jon could feel her staring at him now.

  “Wow. That’s so...brave.”

  “I don’t know about that. Mostly, I was fed up with arguing. I always wished I had my brother Ben’s negotiating skills. He’s an attorney. And brilliant. And impossible to win an argument against.”

  “I know what that’s like. One of my friends back in Philadelphia is an attorney.”

  “I swear, Ben was born to it. Even when he was a kid, he thought everything was negotiable. When he and Ethan
were in high school, this new principal came back from a seminar and instituted a rule that kids couldn’t gather in groups of more than five students at a time. Which is silly. The football players couldn’t even get together at lunchtime and talk about the game. The drama club couldn’t practice. It seemed to affect everyone in some way. The stated goal was to prevent bullying, which, to my knowledge was not a problem at Falcon Creek. Ben was outraged. He went to the school board and argued it violated the students’ right to free speech and freedom of association and a bunch of other legalese. He was citing laws and documents and articles... It was amazing. He won, of course. Someone filmed him, and he made the national news. The following year, the school hired a new principal.”

  “How old was he?”

  “Sixteen.”

  “Wow...”

  “Yeah. When Ben gets fired up, he is a force to be reckoned with.”

  “When I meet him, I will do my best to get on his good side.”

  Jon liked how she said “when” and not “if.”

  “You should probably know, because it’s bound to get mentioned somewhere along the line, that Zoe was engaged to Ben when she and Big E ran off and got married.”

  “Ouch,” she said.

  “Yeah, it was bad. It’s a long story but he blames Ethan and me for having a hand in it. Which is accurate in that we knew she wasn’t right for him. But when I look at it from his view, how can I fault him for never coming around? I don’t regret that part of it, that he didn’t end up with her. But it’s going on five years now...” He sighed. “I don’t know, sometimes I think so much damage has been done in this family that to try and repair it would just rip open all those old wounds and leave it worse than it was before. Does that make sense?”

  “It does.” Lydia nodded. “I know a bit about families falling apart myself.”

  CHAPTER FOURTEEN

  “THAT’S THE HOUSE my brothers and I grew up in.” Jon stopped the pickup where the long driveway forked. He pointed toward a large, white two-story home with forest green shutters. It was more like she’d imagined Jon’s house would be the first day she’d arrived. A wide, welcoming front porch wrapped around the house—it was the kind that begged for rocking chairs and tall glasses of iced tea. Several outbuildings dotted the grounds. It was fronted by a generous expanse of velvety green yard.