The Rancher's Twins

by Carol Ross

  “And then what? You went to live with your mom?”

  “No. I...left.”

  “You left? How old were you?”

  “Fifteen.” Blue pain-filled eyes met his look of concern. “Yes, technically, I was a runaway. But my dad never reported me as one. He knew where I was but he didn’t care.”

  “Lydia... How...” Anger shoved at him, jostling his thoughts and words. How could a man not care enough about his fifteen-year-old daughter to go fetch her from wherever she’d gone? He’d go to hell and back for the twins. Gen and Abby were only five and he already dreaded their leaving home someday. “How did you survive?”

  “Friends, at first, bounced around. Lived in shelter for a while, several shelters. Then I landed at Hatch House, this incredible group home for teens. It’s privately owned, nonprofit. I lived there for almost two years. I got a job as a seamstress apprentice, but couldn’t work full-time because of the labor laws about minors. I worked for cash on the side, babysitting, cleaning, dog walking, house-sitting. That was enough to pay the rent on an apartment with three other girls. Four of us in a one-bedroom apartment.” She chuckled at the memory. “I saved and kept getting different jobs, learned some skills. Got new jobs that paid more and more until eventually I could support myself.”

  Jon felt guilty for ever thinking she was spoiled. “What about high school? College?”

  “A friend and I studied together and I got my GED. No college.”

  “When did you decide to become a nanny?”

  * * *

  THAT WAS THE moment Lydia realized that she’d talked herself into a corner. She didn’t want to lie to him. Of course, she was sort of lying to him by being here as it was. But that was different. She’d had no idea that she’d fall in love—with him, his girls, the ranch, Falcon Creek.

  “I just kind of fell into it. All the jobs and experiences I’ve had seemed to point me in this direction. When my friend saw the position available, he encouraged me to take it.” That felt good, truthful. “And I’m so glad I did. It’s the best thing that’s ever happened to me.”

  “But...how is that possible?”

  “What do you mean?”

  “Stuck out here in the middle of nowhere taking care of someone else’s kids? This is the life you want?”

  Lydia stared back at him, hoping her heart wasn’t showing in her eyes. “Um...” She turned and held her arms out in front of her. “This isn’t exactly nowhere. Pretty sure it’s the most beautiful place on earth.”

  “I’m not trying to put you on the spot here, it’s just that I’m wondering why.”

  In that moment, she wished she could tell him everything. But what would he think of her? There wasn’t a situation in the world that would cause Jon Blackwell to run from his problems the way she’d always run from hers. Maybe, she could tell him a little, though. Tanner’s warnings surfaced but she brushed them away. She’d keep things vague.

  “Well, Jon, I’ve made some mistakes. I haven’t had great luck with relationships.” With a little grimace, she went on, “There’s no luck involved. It’s more that I get involved with the wrong guys. The last one was a real piece of work. I had a difficult time getting out of the relationship.” Gripping the rock she’d gathered, she continued, “That’s part of the reason that I took this job, to get away from him. I needed to get out of Philadelphia.”

  Jon’s eyes homed in on her like a laser beam. “Lydia, did some guy...? Are you talking about abuse? If someone hurt you, I’d like to know about it.”

  Lydia’s heart fluttered helplessly in her chest. She couldn’t help but wonder how it would feel to have a man protect her for once, or at least to not want to hurt her. And not just any man, but this man, who was strong and smart and good. Too good, maybe, because he ended up with a woman who took advantage of that goodness. She ignored the little voice that reminded her that she was currently doing the same.

  But she didn’t want to be. She wanted to protect him, too, from the wiles of Ava and Marilee. She wanted to help him in every way that she could—take care of his girls, support him on the ranch and keep him from working too hard. She wanted to be his partner. And love them all in the way they deserved.

  “Um...he didn’t hurt me physically.” Lydia had often thought he wanted to. She suspected he’d been abusive in other relationships. “But he could be rough and the threat of more was always there. Verbal abuse, yes. I worked for him so that made it all worse.” She sighed. It was so difficult to explain without explaining. “At the end, I lived in constant fear.”

  Lydia watched his mouth flatten out to a thin, angry line. “You deserve so much better.”

  “Thank you. I know I want better.”

  “What do you want?” His voice was low and deep and somehow made her want to cry a little.

  You, her heart answered immediately. It hurt that she couldn’t say it, so she looked out at the view again. Doing her best to lighten the moment, she tossed the rock from the cliff and answered in a teasing tone, “Oh, I don’t know. Not much really. Just love, safety, security... And someday...maybe my own horse.”

  Her attempt at levity didn’t work.

  Jon looked out toward the horizon. He was still and appeared calm. But Lydia knew him better now. Tension radiated from him and she knew it wasn’t anger. Her breath stalled as her pulse began to pound fast and hard. His expression was pure Rancher Blackwell—grave and solemn and almost unreadable. Almost, because she could see the vulnerability there. She knew he had feelings for her, too. The attraction between them had been simmering hotly since he’d kissed her on Easter. What she hadn’t known was what those feelings entailed or how strong they were. But now she did. And at that moment, all of the reasons why they couldn’t be together flew out of her head. Which left only her heart, aching and craving his love. Just say it, she silently pleaded. Because no matter what happened long-term she wanted to hear the words at least once in her life from a person she wanted to hear them from.

  He faced her again, his gray-blue gaze ensnaring hers. Her heart jumped into her throat. “What if I told you that I want those things, too? And what if I told you that I didn’t ever want to let you go, not even when the girls leave for college?”

  CHAPTER EIGHTEEN

  LYDIA STEPPED INTO his arms. He gathered her close, his lips finding hers. The kiss was different this time. With feelings clearer, there was less desperation and so much more sweetness.

  Jon adjusted his hold and trailed kisses along her neck. When he whispered, she could feel his lips brushing against her skin. “I’ve wanted to do this for so long. Kiss you right here. You smell so good. You always smell so good.”

  “So do you.”

  “Ha. Like cows?” He drew back to look at her face and Lydia felt her heart clench when she saw the uncertainty there. He was such a steady, rock-solid guy that these flashes of insecurity from him always surprised her. And they made her despise his ex-wife.

  Cupping his face in her hands, she kissed him. “Yes, like cow and horse and hay and sweat and Jonathon Blackwell and sweet Montana air. You could bottle it and call it Sexy Cowboy and sell it for an ungodly amount of money.”

  “Sexy cowboy,” he repeated and then Jon pressed his forehead to hers. With a groan he closed his eyes. “Do you really mean these things that you say to me? About the girls and me? And the ranch and Montana?”

  “Jon, look at me.”

  He did. “Ava was one woman. I know for a fact you’ve had others. I can name at least five women who’d like to join them and one who’s dying for another chance. And another one who is standing right in front of you wearing her heart on her sleeve. Why is Ava the one that you remember? Why do you let her ruin this for me? For us?”

  “I don’t want her to... I hate that she does. I guess because it was such a failure. I don’t like to fail. Usually when I try hard enough,
I succeed. I gave her everything I had and plenty that I didn’t. And it wasn’t enough. I wasn’t enough. Then we had these two beautiful, perfect children together. How could they not be enough?”

  “I don’t know.” Lydia blinked and then swallowed her tears. Because this was important, and he needed to hear it. “But you have to let her go. You don’t need her. The girls don’t need her. If what I hear is true, you’re all better off without her. Honestly, I suspect that deep inside she knew that. Leaving you is probably the most unselfish thing she could have done. And I know it’s selfish on my part, but I’m glad she did. Because otherwise I would never have had this chance.”

  He smiled and Lydia could feel it; she’d made a breakthrough. “Me, too.” He kissed the corner of her mouth. “And just so you know, Ms. Lydia, she never made me feel this way.”

  “Oh, yeah? And what way is that?”

  “Giddy. Like I’m losing control. No, like my mind is possessed, like you’ve taken over a part of it. Because you’re always there. Every morning I get up and wonder how long I can loiter around the house before you get up so we can have coffee together, or I can at least catch a glimpse of you before I head out. Then I plot and scheme about how I’m going to work my schedule so that I can get back to the house and have lunch with you and the girls. Or even just see you for a few minutes. And this last week when you came into my office in the evenings, it was the unqualified highlight of my day.”

  Happiness roared to life inside of her. It felt like her heart had caught fire.

  “When I was married, I used to dread coming in at night because I never knew what kind of mood I’d be facing. But you... You always seem to be in the moment. Whatever you’re doing, it’s like you try to squeeze whatever joy out of it you can. It’s contagious. And I love that you’re setting that kind of example for my girls. They haven’t been happy like they are with you in a long time. Not since Annie died.”

  His expression was filled with a satisfaction that, incredibly, seemed to match Lydia’s own feelings. He said, “I can’t believe how different you are than I thought you’d be.”

  “It’s nice to finally hear you say that,” she teased.

  “After I say this last thing, I’m not going to talk about Ava anymore because you’re right—we don’t need her. I’m ready to leave her behind. But I want you to know that you’re nothing like her. I mean she wasn’t all bad, obviously, or I wouldn’t have been taken with her. But being with you is so easy. Where she was all hard edges with this cold essence, you’re so soft and inviting.” His hands wandered down her back to lightly grip her hips. “And I’m not talking about your curves, although I can’t stop thinking about those, either.” He brought a hand up and placed it over her heart. “It’s this right here that I’ve fallen in love with. And your spirit that is warm and kind and so generous it leaves me a little awed.”

  “Jon...” A soft sob of joy halted her response. She swallowed it down. Then she shook her head and said, “My cowboy is a poet.”

  “I don’t know about that, but your cowboy is in love.” Eyes shining, he went on, “And the way you love my girls... I don’t even know how to say how that makes me feel...” He shrugged helplessly.

  “They are easy children to love. As easy to love as their father.”

  “Lydia...” He paused, and she watched him swallow his own lump of emotion. He kissed her again and then held her. With his face buried in her hair, he said, “It feels too good to be true. I’m sorry I doubted you. But you have seemed too good to be true from the start.”

  Like flipping on the lights in a dim, cozy room, his words woke her up. Because he was right—it wasn’t true. She wasn’t true. Not like she wanted to be. Her actions were genuine, her love was real, but they had no future. She had to find a way to stay in Falcon Creek. She couldn’t—she wouldn’t—break his heart. Was there some solution to make this situation with Clive go away? She needed to talk to Tanner. She needed to think.

  “Jon, we need to keep this between us for now. I don’t want to confuse the girls and—”

  “I know,” he interrupted. “I agree. But I’m not sure how we’re going to be able to do that.”

  “Bethany and her crew will be here tomorrow. Let’s focus on that first and then...we’ll figure this out.”

  * * *

  LYDIA SPENT A restless night, tossing covers and turning her pillow, along with possible solutions, over and over. By morning, her heart was so heavy she had to drag herself out of bed. She realized she’d forgotten to check her phone the night before. Fishing it out from her suitcase, she discovered several missed calls from Tanner. With a shaky hand, she dialed his number.

  “Lydia, where have you been? I’ve called you like five times.”

  Her already churning stomach took a hard tumble. “I know, Tanner, I’m so sorry. I can’t carry the phone around with me. Everyone here thinks I don’t have one. I only check it a couple of times a day and I forgot last night. What’s going on?”

  “You need to start keeping it with you.”

  “Why? Did something happen?”

  “I had a visit from Wendell yesterday.” Just the name of Clive’s shark of an attorney made Lydia flinch. “He was cagey but he suggested they may have an idea where you are.”

  Panic welled inside of her as her gaze darted around the room. She focused on the closet where she’d stashed her suitcase. She could be ready to go in minutes. A stab of anguish made her knees weak and she stepped back to sit on the edge of the bed. She didn’t want to go. She couldn’t. Not yet.

  “What do I do?”

  “Nothing. Stay put for now. I bet he’s bluffing to try and flush you out, get you to run. A person on the move is much easier to find. When you’re traveling, people see you, you make transactions, interact, et cetera.”

  She blew out the breath she’d been holding. “Okay. That I can do.”

  “Lydia, you need to keep a low profile. You’re doing that, right?”

  “Yes... I mean as much as I can. There are places I have to go. I’m a nanny to two little girls. They have appointments, and there are things...” She doubted Tanner would consider a big party where practically the whole town would be in attendance a place she had to go. Hanging around a nationally known reporter and her camera crew also would not fall under his low-profile criterion, which is why she hadn’t told him about it. “But I’m in the middle of nowhere and Falcon Creek is small. Trust me, if Clive was here I’d know.”

  Tanner sighed. “Okay. Find a way to keep the phone with you and the bundle from your suitcase.”

  “I’m not comfortable carrying all that cash around.”

  “Lydia, if I call and tell you it’s time to go, you won’t have time to pick up your things. You won’t have time to say goodbye to your rancher or your twins. Do you understand? You will get in your car and you will drive away. End of story.”

  She had to ask. “Tanner, can you think of any way we can change the plan? Make this all go away? And not...run?”

  He was silent for too long. “Lydia, you took millions of dollars from Clive. And it’s not like you can give it back.”

  “What if I went to the authorities? The FBI or whoever?”

  “With proof of what? You said yourself he hadn’t actually done anything illegal yet.” Tanner paused. “We talked about this before you took the money. I warned you about how it would likely go down. No, you’re going to have to run. It’s just a matter of when.”

  He went on, but Lydia only vaguely registered his repeated words of warning as reality seeped into her; she had stolen millions of Clive’s dollars. But there was no figuring to do and there was no strategy to make it work out.

  Absently, she agreed to whatever Tanner said. They exchanged goodbyes. Hopelessness and grief overwhelmed her. Her entire body felt weak. She spent several minutes staring blankly at the wall. She needed
to talk to Jon, tell him...something, in case she had to leave sooner than she thought. But she couldn’t. Not now, anyway, not with the interview happening today.

  Still trembling, she headed out to the kitchen, where she realized the girls would be up any minute. Glancing at the clock, she noted she had roughly two hours to take care of the animals, feed the girls breakfast and get them to Willa’s before Bethany Stouffer and the crew from Good Day USA arrived. Grateful for the distraction that this long day would provide, she started moving.

  It wasn’t as if Tanner had said she needed to leave now. He was being overly cautious. The term needle in a haystack had never meant so much to her as it did in Montana. And that’s what she was. The longer she stayed, the more impossible it seemed that Clive would find her here. Other than Tanner and Meredith, she’d had no contact with her old life, much less the outside world. She hadn’t ventured farther than Falcon Creek. Then again, it would be foolish to underestimate Clive.

  Hurrying back to her bedroom, she dug the cash from the lining of her suitcase and peeled off 500 dollars. She rolled it and the phone inside one of Jon’s handkerchiefs, tucked the bundle into the inside pocket of her jacket and zipped it shut.

  * * *

  BETHANY STOUFFER AND her crew descended upon the JB Bar Ranch as scheduled. It wasn’t long before Lydia had a sense of why Jon disliked the guest portion of his grandfather’s place. It felt invasive to have strangers poking around. On a positive note, they all turned out to be so much nicer than either she or Jon had imagined. The crew was respectful and considerate, and everyone seemed interested in everything Jon had to say.

  The producer and one cameraman spent the morning riding around the ranch with Jon, shooting footage of the scenery, the fields, cattle, horses, Jon, Tom, Trout, Jon on his horse with Trout, all the cowboys on their horses, the barns and equipment. Not even the chickens were spared. The first of the one-on-one interviews with Jon and Bethany was set to begin after lunch.