Brothers In Law

by Henry Cecil

  ‘Well?’ he said.

  ‘Does that shake your recollection at all?’ asked Roger.

  ‘Not in the least,’ said the witness. ‘It’s just a receipt for posting a letter.’

  ‘To you.’

  ‘What of it?’

  ‘It was given to the prisoner.’

  ‘How do I know?’

  ‘What is this document?’ asked the judge. ‘Let me look at it.’ It was handed to the judge who looked at it closely. ‘This is dated the 24th,’ he said. ‘It shows that a letter was posted to you on that date by someone.’

  ‘Yes, my Lord,’ said the witness.

  ‘Well,’ said the judge, ‘it apparently came into the possession of the prisoner and if it was issued to him by the post office it shows that he posted a letter to you on the 24th.’

  ‘Yes, my Lord?’ said Mr Blake.

  ‘Well – you’ve said that he only sent you one letter and that was two or three weeks before you received the reference.’

  ‘Possibly I was wrong, my Lord.’

  ‘Possibly anything,’ said the judge, ‘but what counsel very properly puts to you is this. If that receipt was issued to the prisoner are you still prepared to swear positively that you received the reference before, you sent the money?’

  ‘I must have, my Lord.’

  ‘Then how is this receipt to be accounted for?’

  ‘I can’t tell you that, my Lord, unless I had another letter from the prisoner. I suppose I might have.’

  ‘But you can’t remember one?’

  ‘I can’t say that I do, my Lord. Possibly, my Lord, the prisoner got it from someone else.’

  ‘Whom do you suggest?’

  ‘I have no idea, my Lord. All I know is that I was offered a reference and, if I’m offered a reference, I’m sure I wouldn’t send the money without getting it first. I know something about this mail order business.’

  ‘You mean you’ve been cheated before?’ said Roger all too quickly.

  ‘Steady,’ said Mr Green.

  ‘Be quiet and behave yourself,’ said the judge. ‘Your case is being conducted admirably. It is a model of what such a cross-examination should be. Perhaps, Mr Thursby,’ he added, ‘that last question could be rephrased.’

  ‘Have you in the past been cheated?’

  ‘I have.’

  ‘Toffee?’ asked Roger with a flash of inspiration.

  ‘Yes, as a matter of fact,’ said the witness.

  ‘You’ve a sweet tooth?’ asked Roger.

  ‘Well, I have as a matter of fact.’

  ‘You like toffee, apparently?’

  ‘I don’t see why I should be ashamed of it,’ said Mr Blake.

  ‘No one’s suggesting you should be,’ said the judge. ‘Counsel only wishes to establish the fact that you are fond of toffee.’

  ‘Well, I am,’ said Mr Blake, ‘and I don’t mind admitting it.’

  ‘P’raps you decided not to bother about a reference on this occasion and chanced sending the money?’

  The witness did not answer.

  ‘Well,’ said the judge, ‘what do you say to that?’

  ‘I suppose it’s possible,’ said Mr Blake, ‘but I don’t think so.’

  ‘It could have happened?’ said the judge.

  ‘I suppose so,’ said Mr Blake reluctantly.

  Eventually the case for the prosecution closed.

  ‘Yes, Mr Thursby,’ said the judge pleasantly. ‘Are you going to open your case to the jury?’

  What is this? thought Roger. He’s inviting me to make two speeches. But I can’t do that, surely. Henry said I couldn’t, and I’m sure that’s what it said in the book. But here he is inviting me to do so. It’ll look rude if I don’t accept his offer. He’s being so nice to me. I mustn’t offend him. P’raps it’s a sort of consolation prize. Oh – well, here goes.

  ‘If your Lordship pleases,’ said Roger. ‘May it please your Lordship, members of the jury, the evidence for the prosecution has been completed and it now becomes my duty to open the defence.’

  How professional it sounded, thought Roger, as he said it. At that moment the judge suddenly realized that he might have misled Roger.

  ‘Forgive me, Mr Thursby,’ he said, ‘but I assume that you are calling evidence in addition to the prisoner?’

  ‘Oh, no, my Lord.’

  ‘Well then,’ said the judge, ‘you can’t have two speeches, you know. You address the jury afterwards.’

  Well, I knew that, thought Roger. What’s he want to make a ruddy fool of me for? Everybody will think I don’t know a thing. Well, they’re quite right but I don’t want it advertised every moment. All right, here goes again.

  ‘If your Lordship pleases. Mr Green, will you go into the witness box, please?’

  ‘Certainly,’ said Mr Green. ‘With pleasure,’ and he came out of the dock, and went into the box to be sworn. Roger asked him the necessary questions about himself and then asked: ‘Who wrote the reference which was sent to Mr Blake?’

  ‘I did.’

  ‘When did you send it?’

  ‘On the 24th February.’

  ‘Do you identify the receipt for posting?’

  ‘I do.’

  ‘Did you write any other letter to Mr Blake except this reference and the original letter which he has produced?’

  ‘I did not.’

  ‘Did you obtain that receipt for posting from someone else or is it in respect of the reference?’

  ‘It’s in respect of the reference.’

  ‘Thank you,’ said Roger and sat down. Counsel for the prosecution then cross-examined.

  ‘Let me follow this,’ he said. ‘Do I rightly understand your evidence to be this? You offered to supply toffee to Mr Blake, and offered to send him a reference. He does not wait for the reference but sends the money. After you have received the money you send him a reference which you have written out yourself in a false name. Is that your story?’

  ‘That,’ said Mr Green, ‘is not only my story but it happens to be true. I hope you don’t mind.’

  ‘Don’t be impertinent,’ said the judge.

  ‘I’m very sorry, my Lord,’ said Mr Green. ‘I don’t intend to be impertinent but I have a little way of talking sometimes which makes people think that I do. Perhaps I’d better apologize in advance for any false impressions I may–’

  ‘Be quiet,’ said the judge, ‘you’re not doing yourself any good by making these silly speeches. Behave yourself and answer the questions.’

  ‘Well, then,’ said counsel, ‘will you be good enough to tell my Lord and the jury why you thought it necessary after you’d received the money to send the reference?’

  ‘For good measure,’ said Mr Green. ‘After all,’ he went on, ‘I’d offered a reference. Why shouldn’t he have one? I thought it might make him happier.’

  ‘Really,’ said counsel, ‘I completely fail to understand you.’

  ‘Ah,’ said Mr Green, ‘there are more things in heaven and earth, Horatio, than are dreamt of–’

  ‘Now, look,’ interrupted the judge, ‘I shan’t warn you again. If I have any more nonsense from you I shall stand this case over to next session.’

  ‘I hope your Lordship won’t do that,’ said Mr Green. ‘I may get another judge and I like being tried by your Lordship. There’s nothing like a fair trial, I say.’

  ‘Well, behave yourself,’ said the judge, not altogether displeased.

  ‘Makes you feel good, even if you aren’t,’ went on Mr Green. ‘I’m so sorry, my Lord,’ he added quickly.

  ‘Mr Thursby,’ said the judge, ‘I must really ask you to control your client. I shan’t warn him again.’

  ‘If your Lordship pleases,’ said Roger, not knowing how on earth he was to comply with the direction.

  Fortunately Mr Green was a little less irrepressible for the rest of his evidence.

  ‘Now,’ said prosecuting counsel, ‘is this the language you used about yourself in this ad
mittedly false reference? “I have known Mr Arthur Green for many many years.”’

  ‘Quite true,’ said Mr Green. ‘I had.’

  ‘Wait,’ said counsel. ‘Does it go on like this? “And during that period I can say that I have given him credit for thousands of pounds.” Was that true?’

  ‘Well, I’ve trusted him all my life,’ said Mr Green, ‘and he’s never let me down.’

  ‘Has he ever been worth thousands of pounds?’

  ‘He’s worth more than that to me,’ said Mr Green.

  ‘Did the reference go on like this?’ asked counsel.

  ‘“In my view he is in a very substantial way of business and can be trusted for any amount. Knowing him as I do I cannot well say less.” Were you in a very substantial way of business?’

  ‘Well, it’s a comparative term. I was getting a lot of orders.’

  ‘By sending false references?’

  ‘Oh, dear, no – I always sent the references afterwards. I told you already.’

  ‘I cannot see the object.’

  ‘I’m sorry,’ said Mr Green. ‘I’ve done my best to explain and got into trouble with his Lordship in trying to do so.’

  ‘Do you say this was an honest transaction?’

  ‘Certainly. I got the money and he got the toffee.’

  ‘Not all he ordered.’

  ‘There’s nothing about that in the indictment,’ said Mr Green.

  ‘Never mind about the indictment,’ said counsel.

  ‘But I do. That’s what I’m being tried on, isn’t it? It says I obtained goods by giving a false reference. Well, I didn’t. Isn’t that the end of the case?’

  ‘Don’t ask me questions,’ said counsel, ‘and kindly answer mine. Did not Mr Blake get less toffee than he paid for?’

  ‘That’s possible,’ said Mr Green. ‘I had a very bad man doing the packing at that time. He made away with a lot of toffee. Must have had a sweet tooth too. So it’s quite possible Mr Blake got too little. But that wasn’t my fault. I can’t stand over the man who’s doing the packing all the time, can I? I’ve got other work to do. And I’d no reason to distrust him at the time.’

  ‘Who was this man?’

  ‘Well, the name he gave to me was Brown – without an “e” – but, of course, it might have been an alias.’

  ‘Did you get a reference with him?’

  ‘I don’t much care for references,’ said Mr Green. ‘You see–’ he added and waved his hand expressively.

  ‘Are you sure there ever was a Mr Brown?’

  ‘Of course,’ said Mr Green. ‘I can describe him if you like. Aged about thirty-five, middling height, brown hair, turned his toes in as he walked, small moustache – though, of course, he might have shaved it off now. Fond of toffee,’ he added.

  Prosecuting counsel paused.

  ‘Yes, Mr Thackeray?’ said the judge. ‘Any more questions?’

  ‘I suggest,’ said counsel, ‘that you sent the reference before you received the money.’

  For answer Mr Green just waved the receipt.

  ‘Will you answer my question?’ asked counsel angrily.

  ‘Well, Mr Thackeray,’ said the judge, ‘it is a pretty good answer, isn’t it? Can you really do much more with this case? After all, it is for you to prove your case with reasonable certainty. No one likes false references – I don’t suppose the jury do any more than you – but you’ve got to prove it was received before your client sent the money.’

  ‘There is the evidence of Mr Blake,’ said counsel.

  ‘I know,’ said the judge, ‘but how far can that take you in a criminal trial? He was by no means certain about it – and here is the receipt. That is a genuine document, anyway. What the truth of this transaction is, I don’t pretend to know, but the prisoner’s quite right when he says he’s being tried on this indictment which simply alleges one false pretence. I can’t, of course, say there’s no evidence – but it may be that the jury will say they have heard enough already.’

  ‘My Lord, the question of attempting to obtain by false pretences could arise.’

  ‘Surely not,’ said the judge. ‘How can he attempt to obtain money which he has already received?’

  The judge turned towards the jury.

  ‘Members of the jury,’ he said, ‘once the case for the prosecution is closed it is open for you at any stage to say you’ve heard enough and that you’re not satisfied that the prisoner’s guilt has been proved. You may think his methods of carrying on business are pretty odd – you may think that a little more investigation might have been made by the police into those methods – and such investigations can still be made. But there is only one charge against the prisoner and that has to be proved to your satisfaction. Perhaps you’d like to have a word with each other.’

  The jury did as they were told and three minutes later they stopped the case and returned a verdict of Not Guilty.

  ‘Thank you,’ said Mr Green when the judge discharged him. ‘May I say something, my Lord?’ he asked.

  ‘Well, what is it?’ asked the judge.

  ‘I should like to thank you for a very fair trial, my Lord.’ The judge said nothing, but he did not in the least object. ‘Would I be out of order,’ went on Mr Green, ‘in inviting everyone to some mild form of celebration?’

  ‘Be quiet,’ snapped the judge. ‘I’ve a good mind to send you to prison for contempt of Court.’

  ‘Oh, that’s different,’ said Mr Green. ‘I’d better go.’ And he left the dock. He went straight to Roger, shook hands with him and whispered: ‘What did I tell you? Can you sing now?’

  Roger said nothing.

  ‘Would you like my card?’ said Mr Green. ‘In case I can be of any help to you in the future?’

  ‘Goodbye,’ said Roger.

  ‘Goodbye,’ said Mr Green, and started to go. Then he came back.

  ‘Oh, if at any time you should want any toffee–’ he said, and went again.

  Chapter Twenty-One

  A Jewel of a Husband

  The judge rose for lunch immediately afterwards and Roger, as he had been bidden, took his mother to see him in his room.

  ‘What do I call him?’ she asked. ‘I’ve never met a judge before. I don’t want to do the wrong thing. I’d hate to disgrace you.’

  ‘You call him “Sir Stuart,” said Roger. ‘I call him “Judge,” I think.’

  They went to the judge’s room.

  ‘I would like to congratulate you again,’ he said to Roger’s mother, ‘on the very brilliant beginning your son has made. He will go a very long way and you should be very proud of him.’

  ‘Thank you very much,’ she said. ‘I’m so glad he was able to be of some use.’

  ‘Mother’s never been to the Old Bailey before,’ said Roger quickly.

  ‘No,’ said Mrs Thursby. ‘I found it most interesting, and the flowers and herbs and things give it such a friendly, cosy air. Even the prisoner can’t mind too much in such a charming atmosphere. It’s more like a garden party really.’

  ‘I’m not sure,’ said the judge, ‘that our invitations are always as welcome.’

  ‘As a matter of fact,’ said Mrs Thursby. ‘I nearly mislaid mine and it was only by chance that I got here at all. Would you have been very angry if I hadn’t come?’

  ‘I’m afraid my mother doesn’t quite appreciate the seriousness of a jury summons, Judge,’ said Roger hurriedly. ‘I’ll make sure she knows next time. If I’d known this time, it wouldn’t have happened. It was a dreadful shock for me when I saw her in the jury box.’

  ‘Well, all’s well that ends well,’ said the judge. ‘Is this your first visit to the Old Bailey?’ he added.

  ‘I’ve been coming here with Grimes for several days. I’m his pupil, Judge,’ said Roger.

  ‘Indeed?’ said the judge. ‘A remarkably fine piece of cross-examination for a pupil. Quite the best I’ve heard.’

  ‘Thank you very much indeed,’ said Roger, ‘and thank you, too
, for being so nice to me.’

  ‘I’m not sure about that,’ said the judge, ‘but I’ll try to make up for what happened earlier if you’ll come and see me at the end of the day. I’ll send these flowers to your mother.’ He indicated the bouquet which went into Court with him. ‘That is, if she’d do me the honour of accepting them.’

  ‘Oh, Sir Stuart, that is most kind,’ said Mrs Thursby. ‘I shall be thrilled. I’ve never had flowers from a judge before. Oh, yes, I did once now I come to think of it. My husband knew one of the judges who gave licences and things to public houses. He sent me some carnations. I suppose you do that too.’

  ‘Licensing justices,’ said the judge, not entirely pleased at the comparison. ‘No, that is rather different. Well, I’m very glad to have met you and once again I congratulate you upon your son,’ and he got up to indicate that the interview was at an end.

  None too soon, thought Roger. I wonder what else mother might have said. He took her out to lunch, then she went home and he returned to Court.

  The first case he heard after lunch was a plea of Guilty by a woman who had run away from her husband and married someone else. She was charged with bigamy and obtaining credit by fraud from a boarding house where they’d spent their bigamous honeymoon. The judge sent the man to prison and then proceeded to deal with the woman. He was informed that her husband was prepared to take her back again.

  ‘You’re a very wicked woman,’ he said to the weeping prisoner. ‘You have a jewel of a husband–’ he stopped in the middle. ‘Let him come forward,’ he added.

  A moment later the prisoner’s husband went into the witness box.

  ‘A jewel of a husband,’ repeated the judge. ‘Now, Mr Grant,’ he said, looking in the most friendly manner at the husband, ‘I understand you’re prepared to take your wife back in spite of everything. Magnificent. That is so, isn’t it?’

  ‘My heart’s full,’ said the man.

  ‘Quite so,’ said the judge. ‘He very properly says that his heart is full. Most proper. A jewel of a husband. But you are prepared to take her back?’

  ‘My heart’s full,’ repeated the husband.

  ‘Quite so,’ said the judge still beaming at him. ‘We all understand that. Very natural. But you are prepared to take her back?’