Laurie’s eyes narrowed and he risked a quick glance at Jonah. “Is that what happened? Did he try to force you into something?”
Jonah shook his head. “No.”
“Don’t lie to me.”
“I said no. He didn’t try to force me. He just wasn’t happy about it.”
Laurie sighed. “Jonah, look, there’s no need to be impatient about these things. There is no shame, absolutely no shame, in waiting until you find the right person. I know that sounds trite, but eventually someone worthy will come along. Trust me.”
“You’re the right person, Laurie. You.”
“No.” Laurie shook his head, his fingers tightening on the wheel. “I can’t agree to this. You’re asking for all the wrong reasons, and, besides, what do you think Marc would have to say about this? You think he’d be cool with us having sex?”
“Why does it matter what he thinks?”
“It matters because he’s been my best friend for almost twenty years. And you are his baby brother. It’s like a rule in the best friend handbook or something.”
“Are you not attracted to me?” Jonah asked, his voice edged with hurt. “Is that why you won’t do it?”
Laurie bit back another sigh. “Did you really miss the point of everything I just said, or are you deliberately being obtuse?”
“So that’s it? That’s your answer?”
“That’s my answer.”
Jonah huffed. Out of the corner of his eye, Laurie saw him cross his arms over his chest. “Fine. I’ll ask someone else then.”
That time Laurie couldn’t hold back the sigh, but he gritted his teeth to stop himself from saying anything more. Unless it was “yes, I’ll pop your cherry” (and, God, there was a big part of him that would love to say just that), he knew Jonah probably wouldn’t want to hear it. Did that make him feel a little bitter? Yes, sir. But he couldn’t do what Jonah had asked. He just couldn’t. So he held his tongue.
By the time they arrived at Beckett’s Adventure Company, his jaw ached.
****
Jonah sighed, flipped his book closed, and glanced around the shop. Two more hours before his shift ended, and he’d already swept, mopped, and straightened everything he could. The aisles of fishing poles, reels, and other related outdoor gear were in pristine order. There was nothing for him to do but be bored out of his skull, when all he really wanted was to go back to the lake house and curl up in bed so he could lick his wounds and try to stop feeling so pathetic and miserable.
He’d thought it would be easy. He’d never even contemplated the idea that Laurie might say no to his request. But Laurie was, well, Laurie. Always considerate. Always calm and rational and kind. Everything Laurie said made sense. Perfect sense. He’d said and done what any respectable guy would. And that was exactly the reason why Jonah wanted him so badly. Laurie wasn’t the type of guy who would take advantage. But Jonah had thought his sob story about Dirk would have been enough to sway Laurie over into his way of thinking.
Dirk. Snort. Why couldn’t I come up with something more believable? He’d reached for a name and the first to come to mind was Dirk Nowitzki, player for the Dallas Mavericks. Why, he couldn’t even say since basketball season was still months away. He was surprised Laurie hadn’t called bullshit on him right then and there. Well, Laurie might have, if he’d been the type to assume the worst about people. He wasn’t, though, and he had no reason to suspect Jonah was lying. The thought that Jonah made the entire story up from start to finish would never even cross Laurie’s mind. But there was no ex-boyfriend named Dirk. There were no exes at all. Jonah had saved himself all throughout high school…for Laurie. He just didn’t know how to get Laurie to stop looking at him like some irritating little tagalong and start seeing him as a man instead.
Jonah glanced up when the chime above the door went off. It swung open, letting in a gust of muggy air and Travis, the dark-haired hottie who worked at the mechanic shop next door. He was wearing dirty coveralls and there was grease smudged on one of his high cheekbones, but somehow it worked for him. And he knew it, too. He gave Jonah a cocky grin as he crossed the linoleum to the counter and leaned into Jonah’s personal space.
“Hey, gorgeous. Your grandpa in?”
Jonah shook his head. “Nope. He and MawMaw took a ride into the city. What did you need, Trav?”
Travis’s smile widened. “Nothing at all. I just wanted to know if we were alone.”
“And why would you want to be alone with me?” Jonah asked with a soft laugh. Travis always laid it on extra thick, but he was fun to flirt with and he stopped in periodically to help Jonah pass the time while everyone else was out of the shop. Without Travis’s occasional visits, Jonah was sure he would’ve gone stir-crazy already. He’d decided that when he came down to work for his grandpa next summer, he was going to insist on being allowed to lead some of the kayak tours or at least act as a fly-fishing guide. He was tired of being stuck behind the counter ringing up people’s bait and tackle and answering phone calls all day.
Travis reached out to trail one long finger along the back of Jonah’s hand. “Oh, I could think of a few reasons…”
Jonah smirked. “Could you now? Care to share some of those with me?”
Travis licked his lips and crooked a finger to gesture Jonah closer. “C’mere.”
Jonah played along, leaning forward until he could feel the rasp of Travis’s stubble on his cheek and the wash of warm breath over his ear. He expected Travis to whisper something suggestive, but instead Travis nipped at the lobe, just hard enough to sting. Jonah shuddered slightly and started to pull away, but Travis’s hand came up to grip the back of his head and hold him in place.
“I could suck you off,” Travis murmured, his fingertips toying with the short hair at Jonah’s nape. “We could go into the backroom. I’d get down on my knees, take you in my mouth…”
Jonah trembled. He’d never even gone as far as a handjob with anyone. The idea of Travis kneeling in front of him with that arrogant mouth wrapped around his dick was sexy as hell, especially when he envisioned it happening in the back of the shop as the threat of discovery loomed near. Still, it was nothing when compared to all of the extravagant fantasies he’d dreamed up about Laurie over the years. He had enough of those to fill a book the size of War and Peace. And if he took that mental picture of Travis and replaced it with Laurie—holy shit. Now that was so beyond hot he wasn’t even sure there was a word for it.
“I’d suck you so hard,” Travis went on, nuzzling the tender skin just behind Jonah’s ear. “Blow your fucking mind.”
“As good as that sounds,” Jonah said as he started to draw back, his voice a little rougher than usual, “I—”
He broke off when the door chime rang again. The door flew open with enough force to send it slamming back against the wall. Laurie stood on the threshold, and the expression on his face was one Jonah had never seen before—angry but with something darker underneath, something Jonah didn’t recognize, though the sight of it sent his stomach careening down toward his toes.
“Sorry to interrupt,” Laurie said frostily. “But your grandfather just pulled into the parking lot. Wouldn’t want him to walk in on…whatever you two were doing.”
“Oh, we weren’t—” Jonah started, but Laurie apparently didn’t want to hear, or didn’t care about, what he had to say. He turned and stalked away, fury radiating from the rigid set of his shoulders to the ramrod stiffness of his spine.
Jonah swallowed thickly, torn between going after Laurie and saying something to ease the sudden tension he’d left behind. He opened his mouth and glanced at Travis, but the smile on the other man’s face made his breath catch in surprise. It was twisted and cold and detracted from his looks in a way that a little grease and dirt never could. The shock of seeing it made Jonah take an involuntary step back.
In the next second, it was gone, replaced by Travis’s familiar, cocky smirk. But Jonah knew he hadn’t imagined it. He also knew
that he didn’t want anything to do with someone who could go from looking so malicious one second to happy and teasing the next. Especially since, judging by Laurie’s reaction to Travis, there was some bad blood there. Given how laidback Laurie normally was, something had to have gone down between the two of them. Laurie didn’t dislike people without a good reason.
As the sound of voices approached the entrance of the shop, Travis’s smile turned regretful. “Maybe next time, huh?”
Before Jonah could answer, Travis winked and faced the doorway, greeting Jonah’s grandparents as they entered. A few minutes later he said his good-byes and left.
Jonah moved to the glass windows that lined the front of the shop and watched Travis cross the gravel parking lot, only halfway listening to the conversation his grandparents were having behind him. He wondered what had happened between Travis and Laurie. Jonah’s brother was the one with the temper. Laurie was much more even-keeled. Jonah had only seen him angry a handful of times, but never as furious as he’d just been. And it couldn’t be anything like jealousy, not after how thoroughly he’d shot Jonah down that afternoon. No, something major had happened with those two, and Jonah was willing to bet that Marc knew what it was. One way or another, he was going to find out.
CHAPTER 2
Laurie was gritting his teeth again. It’d become a habit over the last few days, starting with the moment he’d approached the door to Beckett’s and seen Travis—Travis, of all goddamn people—with his mouth on Jonah’s throat. In that instant, his vision had gone red. He didn’t want Travis in the same state as Jonah, let alone in the same shop. Kissing him. Touching him. Christ. The very idea was enough to give Laurie an ulcer. Was Travis who Jonah had meant when he said he’d ask someone else?
Over my dead body. Travis was the biggest sleazeball Laurie had ever met. He didn’t deserve someone like Jonah. And Jonah certainly didn’t deserve the treatment he’d get once Travis had gotten what he wanted. Laurie had learned that painful lesson during his last summer in Kentucky two years before. There was no way he’d let that happen to Jonah, especially not when Jonah was still raw and vulnerable from his recent breakup. Absolutely no way.
Of course, he didn’t really have any right to say who Jonah could or couldn’t sleep with. He couldn’t even pull the big brother card since they weren’t actually related by blood, and thank God for that. He’d been having some very unbrotherly-like thoughts ever since Jonah had asked him to take his virginity. And, if he was being honest, a long time before then, too.
Though, technically, there was one option that would allow him to have a say in who Jonah was having sex with, and that was if he himself fulfilled that role. Laurie would make it good for Jonah. He would make sure it was slow and gentle and pain-free, or at least as close to it as possible, since a bit of discomfort was part of it all. But Laurie had promised himself. He’d sworn that he wouldn’t.
“Okay, Laurie. Out with it.”
“Huh?” Laurie glanced sideways at Marcus. They’d brought the last kayak tour in about fifteen minutes prior and were stacking the kayaks back onto the racks before they locked up the boathouse for the night. They’d been working in companionable silence, which unfortunately allowed Laurie’s mind to wander to the very last place he’d wanted it to go.
“You’re acting all skittish,” Marc said as they hefted the last kayak and shoved it into place on the highest rack. “The way you did when we were fifteen and you were scared to tell me you were gay.” Marc crossed his arms over his chest and gave Laurie an appraising look. “Not that I didn’t already know.”
Laurie sighed. “I wish you didn’t know me so well,” he muttered, wiping the sweat off his brow with the back of his sleeve.
Marc smirked. “But I do. And you should be thankful. If I didn’t know you so well, you’d probably still be trying to break the news.”
“Ha. Not likely.”
“Keep telling yourself that.” Marc snickered. “So, come on. Out with it so we can get back to the house and I can whip you at Madden.”
“Says the guy who lost the last two games.”
“Third time’s the charm.” Marc grinned.
Laurie shook his head, helpless to prevent himself from returning the smile. “We’ll see.”
“What is it?” Marc asked, suddenly serious. “You haven’t been yourself the last few days.”
“You know, I really don’t want to talk about it.”
“Don’t want to talk about it?” Marc looked surprised, then a little hurt. “But it’s me, man. We talk about everything.”
Laurie shrugged and dropped his gaze. He was grateful that Marc and Jonah didn’t really look anything alike. It would’ve been outright torture to deal with physical similarities between the object of his desire and his best friend since the days he’d spent crawling around in diapers. Marc was taller than Jonah; broader. His hair was dark blond and kept just short enough to tame its natural curl, while Jonah’s was black and spiky and threaded with a smattering of caramel-colored highlights. Marc’s eyes were such a deep blue they were almost navy, but Jonah’s were brown.
Plain old, ordinary, run-of-the-mill brown. Except they weren’t. Ordinary. Not if Laurie’s reaction to them was any indication. Because those eyes, they made him feel like he was drowning—breathless, overpowered, chest tight—and lately he hadn’t been able to meet them for very long without feeling as if somehow, impossibly, he was already in over his head.
“You’ve never not told me something when I asked.”
Laurie glanced up at the wounded sound in Marc’s voice. “Marc, it’s complicated, okay? I…you’re going to be pissed off, and I don’t want—”
“It has something to do with Jonah, right?” Marc shook his head. “Don’t bother denying it. You two, neither of you can get anything past me. So, tell me. If it concerns my brother, I have a right to know.”
“You’re gonna be mad.”
“Try me.”
Laurie sighed again. “Fine. The other day…”
“Yeah?” Marc prodded.
“Your brother asked me to take his virginity,” Laurie finished in a rush. It came out more like one long word than a sentence, but he could tell Marc had understood him by the way Marc started blinking and opening and closing his mouth like he’d always done when he was shocked or couldn’t think of something to say.
Marc blinked some more. “He…he asked you…”
“Yeah. But don’t worry, I said no.”
“But, why? Why would he…?” Marc trailed off, looking totally gobsmacked.
“He said his ex-boyfriend broke up with him because he wouldn’t have sex. He says he wants to learn about it from someone he trusts before school starts.”
Marc’s brow furrowed. “Boyfriend? I hadn’t known he was seeing anyone.”
“Weird.” Laurie shrugged. “Maybe he didn’t feel comfortable talking to you about it. But he said the guy broke up with him right before graduation.”
Marc’s expression turned thoughtful. “Hmm. And what did he say when you told him no?”
Laurie gritted his teeth. Again. “That he would ask someone else,” he answered when he got his emotions under control. “Then that same day I saw him talking to Travis.”
“Travis?” Marc repeated in outrage. “He lays a finger on Jonah and I’ll break his fucking face.”
“And I’d hold him down while you did it.”
Marc cursed and raked his fingers through his hair, mussing the dark blond waves. “So…you think he actually asked Travis already?”
“I don’t know. I sure as hell hope not. But they looked kind of cozy when I walked in on them in the shop the other day.”
Marc’s eyes widened. “What were they doing?”
“It looked like Travis was kissing his neck.” He couldn’t quite hide the tremor of anger in his voice as he said those words, but if Marc noticed, he didn’t give any indication.
“Shit. I don’t even know what to say.” Marc
started pacing up and down the walkway between the racks. “Why doesn’t he just, I don’t know, start dating someone and do it like a normal person? How do you just ask someone to do that?”
“I told him there isn’t any shame in waiting. He’s worried about being embarrassed because he doesn’t know what he’s doing.”
“That’s what Google is for! And I’m sure there are vast quantities of gay porn available for, um, research and such.”
Laurie bit his lower lip to keep from laughing at how uncomfortable Marc looked at that moment. His best friend had never been anything but completely accepting when Laurie told him he was gay. And he had, in fact, guessed long before Laurie built up the courage to confess. But while he was always there if Laurie needed to talk, he’d never been interested in hearing any of the nitty-gritty details. Laurie didn’t blame him—it wasn’t as if he wanted to listen to Marc’s hetero exploits either—and he was more than a little surprised by how well Marc was handling the whole Jonah situation. Marc was notoriously short-tempered, and Laurie hadn’t really known how he would react to the entire thing. Right then, he just seemed more shocked than anything. Shocked, Laurie could at least work with.
Marc stopped pacing and stared at Laurie in bemusement. “Should I…talk to him or something?”
“Do you want to talk to him?”
“About him asking you to fuck him? Um, no.”
“See, this is why I didn’t want to tell you.”
Marc shook his head. “No,” he said then paused to clear his throat. “No, I’m glad that you did. I wouldn’t have wanted you to keep it from me.”
“So, we’re cool then?” Laurie asked, nervous in spite of himself.
Marc looked startled. “Of course we’re cool, man. Why wouldn’t we be?”
“It’s just…well, he’s your brother, and I thought you might think I had done something to encourage—”
“No, dude. No worries. I just…fucking Travis, you know? I mean, after what happened with you guys…”
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