Desired Too

by Lessly, S. K.

  I took another swig from the bottle, then sat it back down on the bar. I proceeded to take off my jacket, tossing it on the bar stool next to me. I undid my cufflinks, put them in my pocket and rolled my sleeves as if I was getting ready to do battle.

  “Angel, please I…”

  She paused when I pulled out my shirt from my pants and actually started thinking about jumping in the shower. I can stand to take a quick fifteen-minute shower and change before I go to see my father. See how much of a bastard I was?

  I started to walk to my bedroom, apparently done with this shit altogether, when she moved closer to me, asking, “Can you please talk to me?”

  I wasn’t sure if it was the annoyance in her voice or the audacity of her question that set me on the edge, but…

  “Oh, now you want to talk? Okay.” I stopped and stood in front of her. “You want to talk, let’s talk. Are you fucking that son of a bitch?”

  “What?” Raquel, not ready for the blunt way I was coming at her backed away slightly.

  “You heard me. That’s the only logical reason I can come up with for you not to tell me that, one, he was in town, two, that you were spending time with him, and three, that you would go to him for help instead of me. The betrayal, the lying; please tell me there’s a good reason for choosing him over me.”

  Raquel brows furrowed as she shook her head. “I’m not choosing him over you, and I wouldn’t cheat on you. How could you think that I would do that to you? I would never-”

  I cut her off. “Do you have any idea how fucked up I felt to hear that you decided to go to your ex, that coward, fucking pussy motherfucker, instead of me?”

  “Angel, I didn’t…” She moved to touch me and I backed away from her. Eyes wide, her hand snapped back to her body as if she felt something hot. She backed away further.

  I could feel I was about to blow. I was frustrated and angry, which was being heightened by my pride and ego.

  “You made me out to be a fucking fool,” I said to her through gritted teeth.

  She didn’t reply. Instead, I saw a few tears fall from her eyes.

  I took this time to attempt to calm down. Maybe this wasn’t the right time to talk about this. Maybe I needed to step away from her for a little while longer and come back when I wasn’t this pissed off. I was afraid that whatever I said to her from this point would not be good for the both of us. I was that out of control.

  I closed my eyes, about to leave the room when I heard a whisper come from her lips. “No, please don’t go.”

  I turned back and looked at her.

  “Leo, I’m so sorry. I fucked up, simple as that. I should have told you what was going on. The moment Ira came to me, saying that I had trouble coming, I should have told you.” She moved closer to me, her shaky hand reaching out to me, but stopped in mid-air, changing her mind. “I was so afraid for so many reasons, but the main one was losing you. I couldn’t let that happen. I thought if I could just find the person after me or settle this with Basile that I wouldn’t have to involve you. Do you understand? I needed to do this on my own. I needed to prove to you and myself that I wasn’t some helpless, clueless woman that was incapable of taking care of herself. I wanted to prove that I could handle your life, handle you. When I was in California, that’s how I felt. I felt alive, strong and independent. I knew how to take care of myself. Ever since I’ve been home, I’ve lost that assurance, that confidence. It was important for me to…” She stopped talking and took another breath.

  She was still shaking, her eyes no longer filled with tears, but just as red as her oversized sweatshirt.

  “Ira came to me; I didn’t go to him. We hung out in the morning, but it was only so he could update me on any information he learned, that’s it. He followed me around a bit to make sure no one was following me. He said that he would be able to spot whoever Basile sent for me far better than your people could. He was familiar with Basile’s hit man. I didn’t ask questions. I just let him help. And to be honest with you, I wanted him to handle his mess. I didn’t want to involve you because, and maybe it sounds stupid to you, but I was trying to protect you.”

  “Protect me?” I returned, frowning, face full of the incredulous emotions I was feeling.

  “Yes, protect you. I didn’t want to involve you unless it was absolutely necessary.”

  “Raquel-” I started, but she cut me off.

  “Look, I know you are some badass, hotshot mafia boss. I also know you have plenty of badasses that have your back. I’ve met your cousin so, believe me, I know who you have in your corner. I just wanted to be one of those trusted people. I knew that the moment I would have told you about Basile, you would have been on the next thing smoking to California. But how would you explain away my treachery? I’m a snitch. There’s no way you could spin it or support it. Believe it or not, I know how things work. You wouldn’t have been able to be diplomatic about everything, throwing some threats around. You would have gone to him, and it would have been messy. I didn’t want you getting messy on my account. I didn’t want that on my conscience. I also didn’t want to lose you. Despite what you may think, Leo, you’re not invincible. You’re not bulletproof, and if something happened to you on my account… I didn’t want to have that on me either. I wouldn’t be able to survive that.”

  I noticed the distance between us get smaller as tears resurfaced in her eyes.

  She shook her head and just as she blinked, the tears collapsed from her eyes. She then said to me something that pushed away every disheartening feeling I had. “I know what I did was careless and stupid and that I put you in harm’s way by not telling you about Basile, but I wasn’t thinking about that… All I could think about was protecting the only man that I have ever given my heart to, the only man that I have ever loved.”

  And just like that, she had swayed me. My expressionless face stayed true, but inside I was battling with myself to scoop her in my arms and show her just how much I loved her back.

  Oh, fuck it!

  I closed the distance between us, bringing my hands to her face, wiping the tears from her eyes.

  She told me, “I was coming to tell you today. I swear I was. That’s why I texted you. That’s-”

  “Shhh, it’s okay, Raquel.”

  “I’ve been so afraid and scared. I needed you so badly. I could never cheat on you, Leo. No one could ever come close to you. I love you so-”

  My hands moved to her hair as I tilted her head up to me so I could bring her lips closer to mine. I kissed her, just a few light touches, but as always, that was wasn’t enough.

  I devoured her mouth.

  Call me what you want, but I’m completely weak for this woman.

  I pulled back from her lips, but I didn’t go far. I rested my forehead against hers, saying, “Sei l’amore della mia vita. Per te farei di tutto.” Her arms moved around my waist. “Sono innamorata di te.”

  “Leo,” she whispered softly against my lips as it was her turn to deepen our kiss.

  I didn’t have to tell you that things started to get heavy with us. There was shit we needed to talk about, shit she needed to understand, but fuck that. I wanted her.

  Maybe we can take a quick shower together.

  I was just about to suggest it when I felt my phone vibrate.

  I knew who it was.

  I pulled back from her and caressed her face. I took in her scent, then exhaled deeply as if I was releasing all of the anger I had for this whole situation.

  “Don’t ever keep shit from me again,” I told Raquel.

  She nodded. “I promise.”

  “Mi amore, no matter what the situation is, you have to trust that I know what to do to make it better. Despite what you may believe, I don’t always respond with violence.” She started to combat me before I stopped her. “Uh, before you protest the negative, I am fully aware of how volatile I could be, especially when it comes to you. Business is business, though, and this is business. I warned them, Basile, ever
y family in that city, and between you and me, I didn’t have to do that. Yes, you are right, if you would have told me sooner, no doubt I would have personally gone to San Francisco and things would have gotten messy. It’s not your place to decide if I get messy or not. It’s mine. It’s not your place to decide for me how I should react to a situation, or what I can or cannot support. That decision belongs to me and me alone.”

  She started to say something, but I put my finger on her lips, stopping her. “I understand your fears, truly I do. What you have to understand is that I can’t have your fears on me or I would lose. I’m not stupid, Raquel. I’ve been at this for a very long time, and while I don’t think or feel that I’m invincible, I’m too smart to ever put my guard down.”

  “That has to be exhausting,” she said quietly.

  “Yeah, it is, but I can handle it.”

  I leaned down, kissed her lips quickly, and held her gaze. There were times like this where I wished I lived an average life. We had just confessed our love for each other, and we had no time to revel in this moment. I couldn’t make love to her slowly while I told her all the ways I loved her. It was something that I wanted to do all night long, but I had shit to do. I had a meeting to attend, I had a whole family to destroy and I had a brother to kill. It was going to be a very busy night.

  “I have to go,” I told her.

  “I know.” She smiled and slowly removed her arms from my waist.

  I started taking off my shirt, thinking of how bad this meeting was going to turn out. I removed the shirt I had on and went to grab another shirt of the same color.

  When I emerged from my closet, she was sitting on the bed, watching me with so many questions in her eyes, so much worry. I decided to at least try to put her mind at ease.

  “You know I plan to choke the fucking life out of Igor, right?”

  I didn’t break my stride as I headed for the living room. She caught up to me just as I passed the kitchen.

  “Are you serious?” she asked, grabbing my arm to slow me down. She stood in front of me eyes and mouth wide open.

  I bent down and kissed her open mouth. “Deadly.”

  I looked deep into her eyes, letting her know I was the fuck serious. When she didn’t say anything else, I moved around her.

  “Wait, Angel Leonetti, you can’t.”

  I whirled around to face her. “The fuck I can’t. Raquel, the pissant motherfucker purposefully placed you in danger. He went against my warning, and, baby, that is something you just don’t do.”

  “This wasn’t his fault. Not entirely anyway, and I-”

  I stalked close to her, letting my hatred for this man spill over. She needed to see why I was going to kill him. This, however, would be the only time I would explain myself to her.

  “Raquel, this is completely his fault and his mess. He had no business involving you, but he did. He’s baiting me, do you understand? He knowingly put you in harm’s way to save his useless ass, baby. He lied and manipulated you into helping him, and he almost got you killed in the process.”

  She backed away, shaking her head, but I knew she understood what I was telling her.

  “Tell me all of it,” she insisted. “What did he do?”

  And I did.

  “Igor works for Basile, Raquel. He’s on his payroll. He gave you that sob story about being a PI, but he’s one of Basile’s foot soldiers, like what Tiko and Alonzo are to me. Unfortunately, the dumb son of a bitch got pinched. The Feds picked him up, and they gave him a choice; testify and spill all that he knows on Basile or go to prison for a very long time. I’m sure they told him all the shit they were going to charge him with and he believed them.”

  “He chose to testify?” she asked, not really looking at me as she spoke.

  “Yeah, he did, however he knew if Basile found out what he was doing, he’d be dead either way. So he figured out a way to help the Feds, leaving his name out. That’s when he went to you.”

  “And I helped him like an idiot,” she finished.

  I didn’t reply. She didn’t need me to. She closed her eyes and leaned against the kitchen island. I finished buttoning my shirt and tucked it in. I went to my closet by my front door to one of many safes that I had stored in the apartment. I pulled out two H&Ks. I grabbed my double shoulder holsters, checked both weapons and placed them inside the holsters. I grabbed a few magazines and closed the safe.

  When I emerged from the closet, she was sitting on one of the stools at the bar with the bottle I had a minute ago in her tight grip. She took a swig and looked at me.

  “Was he ever in protective custody? I mean, did he just give me up to Basile?”

  I pushed her hair behind her ear. “Yeah, he was in protective custody. The Feds had what they needed to charge Basile with a shitload of offenses. However, as with most families, he had someone on the inside.”

  “Inside the FBI?” She looked skeptically.

  I nodded. “Yes, baby, the Fed, can be bought just as much as a lonely police officer or detective. Anyway, about a month ago, the evidence they had against Basile miraculously disappeared. They didn’t have a case; therefore, they didn’t need Igor anymore. They let him go.”

  She shook her head and took another swig. “I don’t understand, Leo. Then why would he come here?”

  I sighed, took the bottle from her, and placed it on the bar. I pushed the cap back on the bottle, took her hand, grabbed my jacket, and led her toward the back room.

  “Mi amore, that’s simple. Being with you was the safest place he could be.”

  “No, wait a minute, Angel.” She stopped walking, still unable to stomach everything I was telling her. “I was a target in San Francisco. He couldn’t-”

  “Baby, you weren’t the target, he was.”

  “Basile had one of my investigators killed, another was almost killed. He trashed my office, sent me threatening calls.”

  I shook my head. Some of this was news to me. Yet, I didn’t let her see the shock. I took both of her hands in mine and moved closer to her.

  “I don’t know what to tell you about that. From what was told to me, Basile just learned of you a month ago, and it wasn’t from Innis.” She looked at me questioningly and I added, “My brother heard about you and Innis and has added you to his scheme to take over the family. Basile is in town and has a meeting with my father in a little while. I’m going. So I need you to change those short ass shorts of yours and let’s go.”

  She frowned. “Where am I going?”

  “To one of the safest places you can be. My father’s house.”

  “What about Eddie?”

  “Don’t you worry about him. Now, go and get ready. I have to make a call and-”

  Suddenly the window closest to us exploded, sending shards of glass and bullets flying toward us! I was able to push Raquel down and cover her with mine as bullets continued to rain around us. I thought about hearing Lincoln’s mouth after he finds out about this. Every other window had bulletproof glass only because I wanted to allow fresh air in my apartment during the spring and fall months. Lincoln told me it would be a bad idea and sure enough, as I covered Raquel, I had to agree with him.

  When the bullets stopped, I sprang to my feet.

  “You all right?” I asked and she nodded quickly. “Stay here.”

  Before she could argue, I was already out of my door, guns in hand.

  I was expecting to see Junior lying on the sidewalk dead or hunched behind a car. But as I looked around, I didn’t see him at all.

  “Where the hell is he?”

  I heard movement behind me, and I whirled around to find Raquel standing in the doorway.

  “Raquel, what the hell are you doing?” I chastised her.

  She frowned and came out to the sidewalk. “Oh, please, Leo. You needed someone to have your back.”

  It was then that I noticed she had a .38 in a two-handed grip pointing down in front of her.

  Shit, she was fucking hot!

&n
bsp; She looked up and down the street before she fitted her weapon in the back of her shorts. She smirked at me and shook her head as I moved in her direction, desire evident in my eyes.

  “You are a piece of work. Do you know that?” she asked with a smile.

  I shrugged. “Do you realize how sexy you look holding a gun?”

  Keeping my guns pointing down, I started to move to her sexy ass lips when I heard tires screeching behind me. I turned quickly, raising my gun, when automatic gunfire erupted again.

  “Shit, Raquel, get down!” I yelled, but realized quickly I didn’t have to. She was already moving, taking cover behind a car directly behind us.

  I moved quickly to her side, firing blindly as I went.

  I covered my body over Raquel as glass and bullets continued to pummel us.

  Fuck, we’re screwed. Where in the hell is Junior?

  I could feel Raquel’s body trembling underneath me as I tried my best to figure out how I was going to save her from this mess.

  At that moment, fate was definitely on my side. The shooting stopped just in enough time to hear more tires screeching. The shooting started up again, however, the firing wasn’t in our direction. I risked a glance and found Tiko and Stretch coming from a car that was to my left.

  Thank fuck, I thought to myself as I came up from behind the car and returned fire of my own.

  I saw five men firing outside of their trucks in the direction of Tiko and Stretch and was able to hit two while Tiko or Stretch hit another before the remaining two got back into their truck and backed up from us. Not liking the fact that they were getting away, I headed in their direction, emptying my clips in the front passenger side window.

  As the car disappeared around the corner with Stretch giving chase, I turned my attention to Raquel.

  She was still curled in a ball with her hands holding her ears. I gave a nod to Tiko and moved to her.

  “Amore,” I called to her, then touched her arms.

  She looked up at me eyes wide, tears running down her cheeks.

  “It’s okay, baby. It’s over. Come on.”