by K Leigh
Matt shakes his head with a laugh before cutting the strawberry funnel cake with a plastic fork. Well, he tries to cut it.
“Oh my god, Matt. Break it off with your fingers. It won’t bite you.”
“But you might?” He obliges, ripping a piece off the dessert and folding it onto his tongue.
His mouth closes around the pastry, powdered sugar coating his lips. It takes all of my self-control not to lean over and lick his lips clean. Clearing my throat, I look away from him and dig into my own dessert, licking my fingers clean with a loud pop when I’m done.
“What do you like to eat then?” I ask Matt as we make our way to the trash can. “I know you like whipped cream.”
“Food,” he replies, slipping an arm around my waist as we walk by the games. The workers call for us to play for a stuffed animal, but we ignore them and keep moving to the Ferris wheel.
“Seriously. Never had a funnel cake?” I stop and think for a second. “Do you like pancakes?”
Matt shudders, making a face. “No. No way.”
“Biscuits and gravy?”
“Not the way you’re thinking,” Matt replies. “Biscuits alone, yes. Gravy on steaks? Sure. Not what they have at camp for breakfast.”
Horrified, I stop in my tracks. “I can’t be seen with you anymore. I’m going to hitchhike back to camp.”
Stepping away from him slowly, I shake my head. “It was nice while it lasted, Matt Rochester.”
Matt rushes at me, grabbing me around the waist and flipping me onto his shoulder. “Nice try, Natalie Rose Winegar.”
“Don’t you dare call me by my full name. I hate that.” I pound my fists on his back lightly. “Prescott Matthew Rochester III, put me down this instant.”
Before I know it, I’m back on my feet, pressed up against the back wall of one of the games, the balloons popping on the other side.
“No more full names,” Matt growls, reflections of the carnival lights flashing in his eyes.
“Fine.” I purse my lips, unable to move any other part of my body. He has my arms pinned to my sides.
I’m unaccustomed to this dominating side of Matt. He’s always said he’s more of an alpha, but until now, has been satisfied to let me lead. I can’t say I dislike this, though.
He devours my mouth with his, a rough meeting of starving lips and minds. The taste of strawberries lingers on his tongue as it pushes against mine, sweeping my mouth thoroughly as his hands pull at my shirt.
“Break it up, break it up.” A flashlight beams on us, and I squint at the security guard grinning at us leerily. “Go on now, kids. None of that here.”
Matt stands frozen, his hands cupping my breasts, and every part of me aches for him to continue his attention to them. However, getting arrested for indecent exposure is not something either of us needs right now.
“Ready to go?” Matt asks once the guard walks away. We already rode everything a few times before we ate.
“Yeah. They don’t have the ride I want here.”
Last minute lodging is scarce. We meant to drive further today, but after the carnival, we decide to just find a place for the night. Finally, we find a room at a mom-and-pop inn. It isn’t anything fancy, but the bed is clean and the room doesn’t have that nasty smell I remember from a hotel my family almost got stuck in once. When Mama smelled it, she turned around and walked straight back to the office, demanding a refund.
Unpacking what we need for the night is strangely familiar, as if we’re settling into a routine. Together.
“I’m going to shower,” Matt says, grabbing his clothes for the night.
“You go ahead. I’m going to catch up on my texts.” Matt nods and leaves the room and I pull out my phone and scroll through my messages.
I have one from my sister-in-law. The baby is doing fine, but Vi’s ready for her arrival. Mom and Dad are rebuilding parts of our wraparound deck. Kate misses me but hopes I’m being safe. I reply to my parents first, neglecting any mention of where I am and who I’m with. I mean, sure, I should tell my parents that I’m not at camp. But I’m eighteen. An adult. Then again, if I was truly an adult, I wouldn’t have qualms about telling them.
The faucet switches on and I hear Matt cuss at the cold water. Throwing my dress over my head, I tiptoe into the bathroom. Judging by the steam rising above the curtain, the water finally warms up.
Matt is singing as he scrubs his hair. The lyrics sound familiar but I can’t put a name to them, but his husky singing is breathtaking. Pulling the curtain back, I step into the tub, being careful not to make a sound.
When I grab Matt around the waist, he nearly jumps out of his skin. His feet squelch in the water as he spins to face me, bubbles splattering all over the walls and me. He reaches toward me with soapy hands. “You’ll pay for that.”
“No, sir.” The cold tile presses against my skin in my attempt to move away from his sudsy hands.
“You can dish it out but can’t take it, right?” He rubs the bubbles across my face and down my chest. I can barely breathe, blood rushing to my head as he closes the distance between us. Chest to chest, hip bones aligned. A perfect fit for two pieces that belong on opposite ends of the puzzle.
His hand snakes between our bodies, finding my center in one swift movement. A loud thump echoes in the shower and I realize it’s my head banging against the shower wall.
He brings me to the brink and I teeter on the edge of pleasure as we wash quickly, not bothering to dress after we dry each other off. His hands find my waist and he lifts me easily, my legs wrapping around him as our lips melt together.
“Don’t trip over your shoes,” I warn him, my words muffled against his mouth. He steps over them just in time, laying easily on the bed. His body covers mine, his mouth moving over my hills and valleys before settling between my legs.
“Matt, I want you,” I whisper.
“That’s why I’m down here, sweetheart.” His breath tickles my sensitive flesh.
“No, you.”
He freezes between my legs, and when I look down, his eyes are closed.
“Are you sure, Natalie?”
“Positive.” Reaching over, I open my nightstand drawer and pull out the condom I took from Kate before we left. “I’ve never been more sure about anything.”
His hand tremors as he takes the package from me.
“I just want one thing,” I whisper as he trails kisses up my body and buries his mouth in my neck.
“Name it,” he says. “I want this to be perfect for you.”
“I need to be on top. To be in control.” The words come out more confidently than I expected.
Matt flips us easily, adjusting the pillows behind him. He looks up at me as if I’m a goddess, as if I’m the only thing in the world.
22
Lia
Closing the journal harder than necessary, I cause loose papers to go scattering to the floor. My aunt became a rebel when she met Matt. Or maybe she was always one, and this just helped that side of her emerge.
Gathering up all the scattered slips, I tuck them into the back of the journal, sliding it under my pillow in its normal spot. They say curiosity killed the cat, but I’m a sucker for clues. I read Nancy Drew as a child, and it only enhanced my need to know things. Grabbing my phone, I give in to my inner sleuth.
A quick search of Matt’s full name brings up what it always does. But this time, there’s something new. I’d been checking regularly for information about Matt online, but today’s the first time there’s been anything of interest.
“Prescott Matthew Rochestor III announced his engagement to Antoinette Cunningham,” I read aloud. “The oil tycoon proposed in Venice on a romantic gondola ride. The two will marry in the fall.”
My heart drops to the floor at the images of Matt and a picture-perfect woman as he knelt to slide a ring onto her finger, city lights sparkling on the water of the canals. I check the date of the article and notice it was just two weeks ago.
&n
bsp; He’s not the only one moving on, though. To our utter surprise, Natalie came in last night and informed me that she has a date with Leo. Tonight. To my knowledge, he’s never asked her out before, and we were all shocked that she said yes. I promised I’d fix up her hair, so I close the computer and head to her room. After seeing the photos of the guy my aunt wanted to give everything up for now proposing to someone else, I don’t have the heart to be as excited as I was before.
“Don’t you look nice.” Mom nods at Natalie’s shoes from beside me on the couch. “I see you raided my closet again.”
Natalie flashes us a wicked grin. “You’ve been around for like, twenty years, Vi. You should know what happens when you share a shoe size with me.”
“She’s not wrong,” Mom grumbles theatrically in my ear. “Be thankful you have tiny feet, Lia.”
“Where are you guys going, Aunt Nat?” Watching her pace back and forth in front of the window is almost cute.
“Dinner and a movie,” Natalie replies, checking her watch. “I think some new Comedy. It’ll be fun, I’m sure.”
I wonder when the last time she went on a date was. There haven’t been any guys that I recall, but that doesn’t mean she hasn’t dated. The doorbell interrupts my musings, and I watch Natalie hurry to the foyer, smoothing her skirt as she walks.
In all the time Leo has worked on our special projects, I don’t recall him ever ringing the doorbell. Come to think of it, most people don’t.
Natalie reappears after a moment, carrying a jar of her favorite apple butter from the general store. It may be my imagination, but I swear her cheeks are tinged pink, and as Leo joins us, I notice a lipstick smudge on his cheek.
“Hey, guys.” Leo waves in greeting, clapping his hands together as if we’re about to discuss our next Journey’s Farm addition. He doesn’t seem uncomfortable, but when Natalie moves beside him, I notice him shift his weight back and forth a few times.
“Well, you guys have a blast,” my dad calls from the kitchen where he’s popping a bag of popcorn. “Have her home by ten or she’s grounded,” he adds, grinning at the dirty look Natalie shoots his way.
“Want some lemonade?” Leo asks as he stands to get his own refill. He’s technically at the Bentley wedding as Natalie’s date, but she ran off to tend to some random detail, and I offered him the empty seat next to me.
Their movie date must have gone well as it was followed by a night out dancing. I guess the wedding is technically their third date. Natalie hasn’t spilled any beans, though, so I have no clue what’s going on in her mind.
“Yes, thank you.” Watching him maneuver around the wedding guests, I notice Natalie glance at him and then away quickly, busying herself with stocking cups at the drink counter.
“What do you think?” My mom slides into Leo’s vacated chair, following my gaze to where Leo is approaching Natalie. “They’re cute together, right?”
“A perfect fit,” I mumble, stirring my fruit dip a little too much. Why does it upset me to see her with someone? A few weeks ago, I would’ve loved for her to date Leo, but after reading the journal, I can’t be happy for her if she’s settling. I need to know what happened between her and Matt.
Suddenly, it dawns on me that my mom could fill me in on some details.
“Mom, did Natalie ever see anyone else?”
She tenses beside me, her grip tightening on her wine glass.
“What? Oh, yeah, she did.” Mom nods, snatching a piece of celery from my plate and nibbling on the end. “She dated Connor in high school.” She tips her glass, taking several gulps. “She saw a few other guys randomly. No one super serious. Oh, look at them.” She nods toward the dance floor, where Leo has taken Natalie in his arms and they’re moving to the soft waltz.
She seems to be done with the subject of my aunt’s past—a little too quickly for my liking.
“Can’t sleep?” Natalie’s voice startles me, and I spot her in her recliner through the darkness.
Shaking my head, I open the fridge and grab a bottle of water. “No. Just one of those nights.”
Truthfully, I can’t get her past off my mind.
“Come sit with me. I feel like we never hang out anymore unless we’re working.” Her pleading tone makes me feel guilty. She’s right. When I haven’t been working, I’ve been stalking her ex-boyfriend on the Internet.
She’s always been a cool aunt.
When I was little and couldn’t sleep at night, I’d always find her in her recliner. She’d hear my footsteps as soon as they hit the stairs and follow me to the kitchen. We’d make hot chocolate and popcorn and watch reruns of old shows like Boy Meets World or Full House. If I fell asleep on the couch, she’d sleep in the recliner.
Mom and Dad found us like that more times than I can count, but they never reprimanded me.
I grew out of my sleeplessness eventually, but every once in a while, I get up anyway just to have her all to myself for a bit.
“How about some hot chocolate?” Natalie offers.
“That sounds amazing,” I reply, watching her push out of her chair with a groan and make her way to the kitchen. “I’ll make the popcorn.”
We bustle around in companionable silence, me heating the milk on the stove and adding the cocoa powder while she heats up the popcorn popper. Once our treats are ready, we sit at the table beside each other.
“What’s got you up then?” she asks, dropping marshmallows into her drink. “I know you’re a private person, Lia. I am too.” Natalie nudges me, an affectionate smile creeping across her face. One side of her mouth always rises higher than the other when she smiles, giving her a permanently amused smirk. “But you can always talk about anything to me.”
“I know. I just…” I begin, then pause. “I got accepted to a school in New York. And I’ve accepted it.”
Natalie’s jaw drops at my confession. “Lia, that’s amazing! We’ve been so worried about your decision. Your parents thought maybe you’d decide to stay home forever.” She pauses before quickly adding, “Which would be fine, of course. We just want you to be happy.”
Her reaction shocks me. I’d dropped my news as a distraction from the other thing on my mind, the journal and Matt. I never expected her to be so excited.
“You’re not upset?” I ask her.
“Upset? Why in the world would I be upset? This is fantastic news!”
“Because I’ll be away from you all. We’ve been together for, well, my whole life.”
“Oh, Lia.” Natalie reaches for my hands. “You have to live your life. Don’t worry about your parents or even me. Do what makes you happy.”
Sighing in frustration, the truth about her journal bubbles on my tongue, but it feels like it’s too late. If I’d come clean after reading the first few pages, all would’ve been okay. Now, I’ve invaded her privacy in an unforgivable way.
“I know,” I acknowledge. “I guess it’s just harder than I thought it would be.”
Beyond accurate, although Natalie doesn’t realize we’re talking about two different things.
“Maybe you should just talk to your parents. Holding everything back only punishes you,” she says.
“So how are you and Leo?” I change the subject, hoping for more information about their evening after the wedding.
Natalie retreats, tucking her hands in her lap. “Leo and I have decided to just be friends,” she says and, I swear, my heart stops in my chest. “We have a great time together, but it’s just not what I thought it could be.”
A mixture of sadness and relief overcomes me. Leo would be great for her, but at the same time, once you’ve had a passion like I’ve read about, I think anything else would feel subpar.
Once we’re done talking, she focuses on her hot chocolate. She rinses her cup when she’s done,
kissing my forehead before heading to bed, and leaving me alone with my thoughts and her ghosts.
23
Natalie
Past
I h
ate second guessing myself…
“Come on, take a picture with me.” Matt wraps me in his arms, tucking his cold toes behind my knee.
“Stop, you know I hate that.” I giggle, wiggling my legs away from him. His feet are always cold in the morning. “I hate being in the pictures. I just want to take the pictures.”
He grabs his camera, holding it in the air above us. “One picture. I won’t ever ask you to take one again. I’ve just never been this happy in my life. I want to document it.”
Staring into his sincere gaze, I nod my consent. “All right.” I cup his face in my hands, unable to stop the wide smile spreading across my face as the camera clicks.
The happiest he’s ever been is with me. Last night, we made love twice. The first time I was on top, controlling the depth and speed to my comfort level. The second time, he held me, spooning me as he moved in and out of me tantalizingly slow.
Matt’s camera clinks against the nightstand as he sets it down. We both climb out of the bed that became ours last night. We move in a comfortable silence, getting ready separately in the bathroom and collecting only our own belongings. As I zip my suitcase, I look around to find Matt propped on the dresser, watching me with a soft expression.
“The carnival was fun,” Matt says. “I wish this wedding will be as entertaining.”
“Maybe we can cut out early and try out the jacuzzi in my room,” I suggest. He’d given me all the details about my hotel room at the wedding venue. I hate the thought of being in separate suites, but I understand the need for show around his family.
“I may take you up on that.” He pulls me to him and I settle between his thighs, placing a chaste kiss on his lips.
“I’ll go turn in our keys and load up the car while you finish getting ready,” he says, kissing the tip of my nose. “We’ll stop for breakfast on the way.”