Arousing Consequences

by Cam Johns

  "Jackson, you're not buying me a new wardrobe. So either I go home or I'll have to buy clothes with money I don’t have." He looks even more upset but I guess he's decided to choose his words carefully this time. He looks at his watch and back at me. I giggle at him. "You think about that and I’ll go call my mother." I get up from the table, realizing I don't know where the phone is. He gets up and grabs my hand, pulling me behind him quickly, taking me through the living and dining rooms and lastly a door that opens to his study.

  "You can use this phone...it's untraceable. I have to call Jonathan." He turns to walk out, then changes his mind, pulling me into him kissing me hard. Oh. "I will always protect you, whether you like it or not." He says, then turns to leave, closing the door softly behind him. He leaves me there craving him. I'm fucking him tonight. I smile thinking about it as I pick up the phone to call my mother.

  "Hello...Catherine speaking." My mother says formally.

  "Hi mom." I say quietly not sure if she's spoken to Kevin.

  "Oh my God Karisma! Where are you?"

  Okay she has. "I'm okay mother, don't worry."

  "Kevin is here, he's been worried sick."

  "Is that her?" I hear Kevin ask in the background.

  "Mom...Mom..." She continues to talk to him. "Mom! I don't wanna talk to him!” Just then Jackson barges into the room still talking to Jonathan.

  "I think you should speak with him. He doesn’t even know why you’re upset Izzy." She says.

  "He will know soon. I'll call you later." I hang up quickly and look up at Jackson who is standing in the doorway.

  "He's at her mother's." He hangs up as I look at him puzzled. Why would that matter? "C'mon, I'll take you to your house." He reaches for my hand but I don’t take it. He turns to stand in his intimidation stance. I really don't like when he does that toward me.

  "What's going on?" I say putting my hands on my hips and tapping my foot. He chuckles and walks to me, wrapping his arms around my waist.

  "Let's just say Jonathan is going to keep Kevin occupied while we go to the house and pack."

  "Occupied? He's not going to hurt him right?” I look at him concerned.

  "No... nothing like that, okay?" I nod. He kisses me on the forehead and pulls me out of the study. We go upstairs to his room and into the closed double doors, leading to his closet. It's huge, much larger than mine at home. He goes over to the drawers to pull out another T-shirt and sweatpants for me. "Here, change quickly so we can go." He smiles.

  "Okay." I turn to go to the other room and change. Once done I go downstairs to wait in the living room.

  "I think it's time." I overhear Jackson's one-sided conversation. "I can't hide it anymore...You should both come tonight...I understand...got it." He hangs up.

  "I'm ready." I say quietly.

  "Let's go." When Jackson and I walk out, there's someone standing in a suit and shades holding the door open to Jackson's Q7. I look up at him, unsure of what's going on. The guy looks like some sort of agent. "I'll explain later." He ushers me into the car and closes the door. He and the man in black speak briefly before he gets in on the other side. I'm getting worried now. He grabs my hand and holds it while he just stares out the window. He's never been this quiet. I decide not to push and let him have his moment.

  We get to my house within thirty minutes.

  "I'll wait here." He says kissing my knuckles. I nod and slide out when the man in black opens my door.

  "Thank you." I say to him and he nods officially.

  I grab the spare key from our hiding spot and go into the house, turning the alarm off. It’s eerily quiet. As I take my shoes off I peek over into the living room, spotting a blanket and pillow on the couch. I guess Kevin slept there. I head upstairs to start packing, filling three suitcases and a few garment bags. I look around the room, remembering happier times, when tears start to fill my eyes. I can’t believe this is happening, it’s like I've lost three years of my life. I sit on the bed and cry into my hands. Before I know it Jackson has come into the room.

  "Oh, Karisma," he says pulling my hands down, "don't cry. Please." He wipes the tears from my eyes. "Listen, baby we have to go…Kevin's on his way here." He and the man in black grab my things while I muscle up the strength to get up and grab my photo album and photos of my father. I get downstairs just as they’re closing the trunk. The man in black quickly takes the photos from me before Jackson grabs my hand and damn near shoves me back into the car. Why are they in such a hurry? So what if he does see me.

  "Is there something I should know, Jackson?" I ask as he gets in.

  “Later." he says grabbing my hand. When the man in black backs out of the driveway, I see Kevin's car coming.

  "There's Kevin's car." I say quietly.

  "Drive, Logan!" Jackson snaps. I turn to face Jackson, shocked at his outburst.

  "He wouldn't hurt me Jackson. What's wrong with you?"

  "So you don't think he'll be angry seeing you with another man?" I guess he would. Before Kevin could follow us, another car speeds up from behind him and cuts his car off. I wonder who that is. "Listen, Alyssa and Jonathan are coming over soon. We'll talk then.” He kisses my hand again and smiles gently.

  We ride silently for a while, before I see him sulking again. I peek at the man in black, which I now know as Logan, who's staring straight ahead. I take off my seat belt and climb into Jackson’s lap. Before he could speak, I wrap my arms around his neck and kiss him softly and slowly. He pulls me into him, letting his hands roam down my leg. As we slow down the intensity I look up at him, his hair slightly in his face. "Thank you for trying to protect me." I whisper, moving the hair back behind his ear. He smiles lovingly at me and hugs me laying my head on his shoulder.

  About twenty minutes later we get back to his house. "I'm sure you want to shower and change."

  "I think I wanna take a bath." He smiles down at me.

  "Okay...let's go.” I climb off of his lap and out the open car door.

  "Thank you, Logan." I say softly smiling at the man in black.

  "Ma'am." He replies.

  "Come...I'll have your things put up while you're in the bath.” Jackson leads me upstairs to his room and I stand quietly while he runs my bath water. "Come." He pulls me into the hallway to the double doors closest to his bedroom. He opens them and it's another closet just as large as his. "Mrs. Johnson will put your things in here, okay?" I walk in, gloriously surprised.

  "This is for me?" I ask in awe, eyes wide.

  "Yeah...is it not big enough?" He asked, screw faced.

  "Oh my God...Jackson...I don't even have enough things to fill this room."

  "You will." He says simply.

  "Oh Jackson," I say walking toward him, "so anxious to spoil me."

  He pulls me into him. "Gladly." He kisses me quickly. "Come baby." He grabs my hand, leading me back into the bathroom. He turns the water off and waves his hand in the water to check the temperature. "I'll be downstairs. Take your time." He kisses me quickly and leaves, closing the door behind him.

  I start to undress, looking at myself in the large mirror above the sinks. I stare at my body noticing my tiny love handles. I'm not sure if I'll feel comfortable showing Jackson my nakedness. I can hide these imperfections when I'm wearing clothes, but not naked. I start picking apart and examining what I feel Jackson wouldn’t want to see. I'm definitely not one of those model types I see white men with. He must be okay with my large ass, I can’t hide this in anything I wear. I consider what he'll say when I take these clip-ins out of my hair. My hair is shoulder length anyway but he’ll know the difference. I never worry about these things with black men because they know...and they appreciate curves. I’ve never been with a white man, so I don’t know what’s expected.

  I decide to give my self-esteem a break and step down into the tub. The water is perfect. He knows me well. There's a remote by the tub so I press play. Coltrane plays through the ceiling. Oh, this is so calming. I lean back in t
he tub against the pillow and play with the water against my body. My mind begins to wonder as I relax… I doze off.

  Jackson enters the bathroom and climbs into the tub with me. He crawls up to me and kisses me awake. I look up at him, startled.

  "Hi." I whisper.

  "Hi." He kisses me again and I wrap my arms around his neck, deepening the kiss. I pull him against me as his hands roam my legs. He kisses me harder as his hands start to roam my inner thigh. As he reaches the middle, he trails his kisses down to my neck, sucking and biting softly. He rubs my clit back and forth. Ah. The man knows how to touch me already. He slips two fingers inside of me and back out. He sits up and watches me as I begin to grind around his fingers. He moves them in and out faster and faster. "Cum on my fingers baby." I open my eyes and look up at his lascivious blues. Oh. We stare at each other as he pounds his fingers into me-

  There's a knock at the door that startles me awake, interrupting my reverie.

  "Yes."

  "Baby, they're here when you're ready."

  "Okay." Dammit. I'm fucking him tonight…I can't take this.

  I wash and rinse off quickly then let the water out of the tub. I slip on a towel and run to my new closet. As he said, all of my things are hanging or folded in drawers neatly. As I go through the drawers, I come across the drawers meant for jewelry. Of course, he put the Cartier necklace in there. "That sneaky loser." I whisper to myself. I put my hair in a ponytail since it’s a little damp and find my stretch pants and tank top to head downstairs.

  "Lizzie...I really hope she doesn't leave." I overhear Jackson's desperate voice.

  "Bro, let’s not think the worst."

  I walk into the living room, feeling the tension immediately. Jackson is sitting in his chair with his head in his hands. Alyssa is sitting on the arm of the chair rubbing his back. The lively Alyssa I have come to love isn't who is before me now. Jonathan is standing in the same intimidation stance Jackson has.

  "What's going on?" I ask nervously, scared to hear the answer. Jackson jumps up, as if shocked to see me. He closes his eyes, taking a deep breath before coming to take my hand and leading me to the couch. He sits beside me as Alyssa comes to sit on the other side. I look at Jackson who is visibly nervous, his blue eyes now gray. I grab his hand and squeeze tightly. He looks at me with worry. "Please Jackson...tell me." Alyssa puts her hand on my knee and I peek at her not understanding what she has to do with this.

  "Karisma," Jonathan comes to sit on the coffee table in front me, "when you got hired, I did a background check on you extensively, so of course I know everything there is to know."

  "You must be referring to my father..." I say quietly.

  "Yes, and I did see that his case is still open but that's not why we're here."

  "Okay...then why?"

  "The day Jackson met you he called me. He said he was interested in you..." he pauses and glances at Jackson, who gives him a nod. "So...I dug deeper into your life which meant investigating Kevin."

  "Investigating? What do you mean investigating?" He gets up to retrieve a manila folder on the mantle of the fireplace, handing it to me. Jackson releases my hand and stands slowly, walking away from me. I watch him intently, concern washing over me as I am grabbing the folder from Jonathan. The first thing I see is a mugshot. My eyes widen in disbelief. Why is there a mug shot of Kevin? He looks awful. I read his arrests: robbery, burglary, grand larceny, assault, assault with a deadly weapon, check fraud, fraud and the list goes on. "This can't be." I say confused, looking up at Jackson. "I don't understand, this isn't the Kevin I know." I say, shaking my head. I continue to flip through the pages of the folder until I get to the last page of "Known Associates". I only recognize Mike…I knew he was shady.

  "Karisma, there's more." Jonathan says quietly. More? How could there possibly be more. I close the folder and look up at him attentively. "Once I got his rap sheet, I called a friend that works for the FBI. Turns out he's being investigated."

  "What! This is some fucking bullshit!" I shout, interrupting him. I stand abruptly and walk away from them. Jackson walks up beside me.

  "Please...come back so you'll know everything." He reaches for my hand and squeezes. I look at him and I can tell he's worried and nervous about something. Something Jonathan hasn't gotten to yet. I go back to the couch and sit down.

  "I'm sorry...continue." I say quietly to Jonathan.

  "He's crooked and his business is a front. He uses it for money laundering for him and some very bad people.” Tears begin to fill my eyes. "Shall I continue?" He asks, placing his hands on top of mine. I nod yes. "Okay…my friend says they've had a warrant for surveillance in the house and phone lines but it was difficult obtaining access to your home."

  "Yes...Kevin never liked anyone there. He had an alarm installed that he said was developed specifically for him...never really knew what that meant...he even made sure someone he trusted was home, even for technicians." I say wiping the tears from my eyes.

  "Exactly...so I said I would help. I called Jackson and... well..." I look up at him as he even struggles to get something out. Then I remembered overhearing Jackson asking Alyssa to do something she didn't seem to want to. I look over at Alyssa who has put her head down. I jump up again.

  "No...Alyssa...you came early to plant bugs in my house!" I shout. "Is that the only reason why you became a friend...because you were using me?" Tears flood my eyes. I thought I actually made a friend I could trust. She jumps up and tries to grab my hand, but I snatch it back. I look over to Jackson, who won't even look at me. "I can't believe this, you two were using me? You three?" Tears start to pour down my face. "You fucking assholes! Did it ever occur to you that had you told me the truth I would do it for you?" I sob, walking toward Jackson but not close enough for him to touch me. “This is what you wanted to tell me that day in my office…isn’t it?” Jonathan stands between us as if he's protecting his brother from me.

  "I told him not to. I didn't know if you were in on it, too."

  "What!" I try really hard to keep myself from slapping him across the face. I cross my arms in front of me. "Okay, so humor me. When did you figure out I wasn't in on it?"

  "Well Jackson insisted you had no idea from the jump...but I didn't have proof until the day you had that argument about the block on his phone...and him sneaking around trying his best to hide his conversations." Jonathan says softly. I walk away from them again, throwing my hands up.

  "I can't fucking believe this shit. You saw everything in my house..." Thinking about everything that happened in my house since Alyssa came, they all start fluttering back to me…the arguments, the makeup sex, me walking around naked...Everything. I feel totally violated. "Oh my God...everything?" I say turning to face them completely mortified.

  "Just me," Jonathan says, "as soon as we learned you were innocent, Jackson and I decided to have you followed for safety. Neither of us wanted anything to happen to you...but we couldn't tell you about the investigation and we still can't but we couldn't take not telling you...especially Jackson.” I look at Jackson who has yet to look up at me. I walk toward Jonathan.

  "You watched everything?" I guess he didn't answer me quickly enough because before I know it my hand is smacking him across the face. Hard. "Fuck all of you!" I say angrily before running upstairs. I guess Jackson tried to follow me because Alyssa stops him.

  "Jackson, no give her some space." she says.

  Upstairs, I run into the extra room and go out on the balcony, staring at the huge property. Not feeling as blissful as I was in this exact spot hours earlier. Tears fall down my face once again. I really didn’t think I would be feeling like this as a result of something any of those three did, but especially not Jackson. I go back to what Kevin said to me before...

  You'll never look at me the same

  You're going to leave me

  I thought he was just being dramatic, but he's right. The minute I found this out, I would’ve been out the door. I'm all for stan
ding by your man, but I wouldn't be comfortable standing beside a complete liar and criminal. He lied to me from the beginning. One of the first things I asked him was has he ever been to prison. I can't believe I actually have to admit to my mother she was right. That son of a bitch! I wonder what else he's lied about. Come to think about it, if these people he works with are as bad as Jonathan thinks they are, he has put my life in danger.

  "Are you okay?" Jackson asks quietly. I turn to face him, leaning my back against the railing. He starts to walk toward me but stops once I put my hand up. "Karisma…please…I really wanted to tell you." I start to cry uncontrollably, so he wraps his arms around me. I'm tempted to let him hold me but I'm just too angry to spare his feelings. I push him off of me.

  "No...Don't Jackson. Get outta here!" I yell at him. He stares at me with his grief-stricken blues which are heart wrenching. I turn back to the view and I hear him leave the room. For some reason I feel instantly sorrowful. I understand somewhat why Jonathan did what he did. One thing I've learned is that he protects his brother, and Alyssa's devotion to Jackson is endless. I guess I can understand them but I still feel entirely violated. I guess that's how Jackson knew I would come to him eventually. But why do I feel like the butt of the joke? This is clearly why he wouldn't have sex with me sooner. He wanted me to have all this information before I made my decision. I'm tired. I don’t want to think anymore. So, I laid down in the bed and cried myself to sleep.

  Chapter Twelve

  When I wake up, it's dark outside, and the balcony doors are still open letting in a cool breeze. The events of the hours before replay in my head, while having this compelling urge to go to Jackson. I get out of the bed, close the balcony doors and see it's two fifteen in the morning. Opening the door to the extra bedroom, I see that Jackson's room door is open. I tiptoe down the hall and peek in to see if he's asleep. He's not in the bed, but the balcony doors are open. I walk to the door and he's leaning on the railing in his pajama pants, shirtless.

  "Couldn't sleep?" I say softly. He doesn't turn to face me.