The Lies of Pride

by Lily Zante

  “On what grounds?”

  “On my grounds. Get out! The pair of you.”

  I close my eyes, wishing everything would disappear.

  “I ‘spose you need some ice?” she asks Callum.

  “Ice would be great.” He winces, and I can tell from looking at him that his hand is likely fractured, and he’s going to be sporting another black eye. He sits down across from me. “Hey.”

  “I didn’t need you to do that for me.” It’s been a while since we last met. Seems like so much has changed since then.

  “I saw your face as soon as I walked in. I saw his hand on your shoulder. There was no way I was going to—”

  “You’re not my keeper, Callum. You don’t need to play the hero.”

  “I wasn’t playing the hero. I’m not going to let anyone do that to you.”

  I inhale deeply. “I don’t need you to do that for me.” I don’t need heroes. I have managed just fine being my own hero. Even if I have occasional lapses.

  “It’s not true. About me and Alyssa. It’s not true what they said about you, and the shit they made sound like I said about you.”

  “I know that’s not true,” I hiss back. It annoys me that he thinks he has to spell it out to me.

  “That’s not how I meant it. The media are bastards. You should know that by now.”

  “I do.” Who’s he trying to convince? I stare at my notes. Part of me wants him to go, and the other part wants him to stay. Callum makes things better, but someone like me doesn’t need the headache that being a part of his life entails. It’s a good thing I didn’t make a mistake in telling him my story, that I never trusted him one hundred per cent. He’s not a bad guy, but he’s a big star, and I’ve seen at close hand how much of his life is lived under the microscope.

  “I’m sorry I wasn’t there for you. I was ready to come to the fight. I was ready to leave, but Rudy cornered me. They had it all set up. The meeting with the studio heads, the planned dinner with Alyssa.”

  “I don’t need to know.”

  “I want you to know.”

  I tap my pen on my notepad. “But I don’t need to. It doesn’t matter.”

  “What’s that supposed to mean?”

  “That it doesn’t matter. The fight is over with, it’s done. It doesn’t matter now.”

  “Don’t push me away, Nina.”

  A quick glance around the diner tells me that people are staring. Some have their phones out and are filming. “You have an audience,” I say, lowering my voice.

  “Then let’s go somewhere.”

  “No.”

  “No?” he asks, surprised. Why he is surprised comes as a shock. He let me down. Did he think he could waltz in here and kiss and makeup with me?

  “No.”

  “You’re doing it anyway. Pushing me away.” He sounds weary, as if he was expecting this. “How’s Elias?”

  “How do you think?”

  “You have every right to be angry with me. I wasn’t there when you needed me, I get why you’re angry, but let’s talk it out. Don’t shut down on me.”

  I lower my voice, “If you wanted to break up with me, with whatever it is that we have, you should at least have told me instead of giving me a feeble excuse why you couldn’t come.”

  “Break up? What are you talking about?”

  “I find it hard to believe that you—Callum Sandersby the famous actor—you couldn’t be there for me when I most needed you.” It’s a long shot, and it’s come down to him and the papers. I don’t trust the papers, but now I’m starting to wonder if I should trust him.

  He lowers his voice. “I told you. Rudy set me up.”

  “You expect me to believe that you’re his puppet?”

  He presses his finger and thumb against his brows, then looks at me. “You don’t know how Hollywood works.”

  “This was important to me.” I’ve never been one to rely on others because I could never trust anyone. Trusting Callum, relying on him, it was a risk for me.

  “I know it was, and believe me, I feel bad. I feel real bad. You don’t have to beat me up about it, Nina, because I’m already beating myself up about it. I’m sorry. I am so, so sorry.” He reaches out as if he’s going to take my wrist, then moves his hand away. “Are you … are you okay?”

  “You don’t need to worry,” I say, in case he thinks I’m going to start going back to my old ways.

  “Let’s go somewhere and talk this over. I know you feel bad for Elias. I know how close you two are. At least you have a brother.”

  I stare at him, wondering why he said that. Why he played that last card. “What?”

  “It’s my fault.”

  “What?”

  It slipped out. He won’t understand. “Nothing. I have to go.” I rush to gather my work.

  “You think it was your fault? For Christ’s sake, Nina. Not everything is your fault. How can this be? Elias got into that ring to fight. You had no input in that.”

  I get this sounds crazy to him, but I also understand that I can’t be a part of Callum’s life. I like my privacy, my anonymity. I got lost for a few stolen moments being with him. I let my guard down and thought I could be normal; a normal woman with a normal life, with a normal guy. Maybe not so normal. He’s not normal, and his lifestyle is not normal.

  That, right there, tells me I picked the wrong guy.

  Or the wrong guy picked me.

  He pursued me.

  For the wrong reason.

  The logical side of my brain schools me on the truth, while the pitter patter of my heart tells me I should forgive him and forget. I’ve met Rudy, I’ve heard how he speaks. I knew Callum had contracts and obligations to stick to. I just didn’t think asking him to be there for me was that big a deal. But it’s not just that one night. I’m scared that I started to depend on him. I started to trust him, and in the end all I feel is let down.

  That’s what I’m scared of the most.

  Despite who he is, I stayed away from Callum for the longest time, only letting him in because I thought he was different. He’s not a predator, like the one I have known. He’s not a slime bag, like Rhys. He’s a nice guy, and he cares for me—it’s not him, it’s the getting used to someone and letting yourself feel vulnerable that scares me.

  He stands up and grabs my arms, further up, so that he won’t touch my scars. “We need to talk. You’re upset, more than I realized. I messed up, but I couldn’t get out of it.”

  “I have to go. I’ll be late.”

  “There’s something else, isn’t there? Something you’re not telling me? Something you’ve never told me?”

  I stare at him, my mouth open, the breath stuck in my throat. How is it that he can see right through me?

  “Let go of me,” I say, feeling uncomfortable.

  “I won’t let you walk away, Nina, not until we talk things through.”

  I glance over his shoulder and see people filming us on their cell phones. “I can’t be with someone who’s life is on display for the public to consume.”

  Chapter Fifty-Five

  CALLUM

  * * *

  I expected her to be angry. I didn’t expect her to stay angry once I had explained. There’s more to it, I know. She blames herself for Elias losing, just the way she blames herself for most things.

  I’m going to give her the space she needs, but I’m not going to give up. It’s not the last of it when a few days later Dottie shows me the video of the altercation in the diner between me and that idiot who laid a hand on Nina. He’s the boyfriend of her so-called waitress friend and he’s lucky Frankie broke up the fight when she did.

  I’m lucky Frankie stepped in. My temper got the better of me and it would have given me the wrong publicity if I’d landed a few more punches.

  “This isn’t great publicity,” Dottie counters. “Are you pleased about this?”

  “No.” I’m not pleased but I saw the way that moron put his paws on Nina. I saw the way sh
e reacted. “It could have been worse.”

  “Nina’s in the clip.” Dottie shoves her cell phone closer in my face. Whichever idiot took this, got us talking afterwards. It’s plain to see me and Nina sitting in one of the booths. I feel the color drain from my face and I can see the tawdry headlines already.

  Dottie nods. “See, that’s what I meant. Now you’ve dragged her into it.”

  “People film everything I do.” I grit my teeth, hating the fact that I can’t live my life without the whole world finding out what I’m up to.

  “Maybe next time don’t go and pick a fight in a public place.”

  “I didn’t pick a fight. The guy was being a jerk.”

  “How’s Nina going to feel about this?” Dottie puts away her phone. “What did she say, about you not making it to the fight?”

  “She wasn’t happy.” I sigh out loudly. “She wasn’t happy at all.”

  “It’s a shame you couldn’t go.”

  “It’s not that I couldn’t go. I had every intention. Deliberate obstacles were put in my path.”

  “I feel sorry for Nina. I like her. She’s real, genuine. Nothing phony about her,” says Dottie. There is nothing phony about her, and that’s one more thing I cherish about her. “She left me a message apologizing about the tickets.”

  “The tickets?” I frown. “What tickets?”

  “I’d asked her, rather cheekily, if there was a way I could get tickets to the fight. Sam’s a boxing fanatic.”

  “That was a big thing to ask her. You barely know her.”

  “I got to know her in LA,” retorts Dottie. “I would have paid for the tickets, but she forgot. Says she had a lot on her mind and she’s sorry.”

  I feel even more of a jerk now. If anyone should be sorry, it’s me. I have to make it up to her.

  “This has gone viral, Callum,” Dottie taps her cell phone. “Rudy will be on the warpath.”

  I prepare myself for that eventuality.

  * * *

  NINA

  * * *

  The media is unforgiving. All morning, in between serving customers, I’ve been looking through the papers.

  Cardoza stopped in the sixth by a fearless and better prepared Garrison

  * * *

  Elias got sloppy and paid the price

  * * *

  Cardoza stunned by relentless Trent Garrison in one of the biggest upsets in boxing history

  “Boxing is an unforgiving sport at the best of times,” Lou tells me when I pass by the gym. Lou only got back yesterday but Elias and Harper are still in New York. “But Elias will be back. He’ll be fighting fit and better prepared.”

  “I hope so.” Only Elias winning the belt back will make things better. I haven’t been able to sleep. I haven’t been able to do much. I’m pretty useless even at the diner.

  “You’re doubting him?” he asks, slowly lifting a wiry white eyebrow. “He took a beating out there but there will be a rematch. No doubt about it. Six months max.”

  Lou’s thinking of making Elias fight that soon? “Will he even be ready?”

  “‘Course he’ll be ready.” Ernesto, the gym handyman, walks into Lou’s office with three cups of coffee on a tray. He offers mine up to me first. “Thanks, Ernesto.”

  “You doubting your brother?” he asks me, looking perplexed. “You’ve never doubted Elias before.”

  “She saw the same beating we all saw,” says Lou, leaning back in his chair. “He wasn’t complacent in there. He just didn’t seem to know what hit him.”

  We all sound like a trio of doomsters as we pick through the remnants of Elias’s fight. Ernesto heaves out a sigh. “But he was prepared. I seen him fight, I seen him spar with the guys. He was solid.” He nods at Lou. “You said he worked till he dropped over at Banks’s place.”

  Lou taps his pen on the desk. “He was fighting fit. He had it all under control. This should have been a win. It wasn’t going to be an easy win, you saw Garrison, but it should have been Elias’s win.”

  Ernesto takes a sip of his coffee. “Problem is, Garrison’s been working out. Been in the best shape I’ve ever seen him. He was hungry to get those belts back.”

  “That he did, but Elias wanted to hold onto them just as much,” Lou states. “Everything okay between him and Harper?” he asks me.

  “Yeah. They’re good. No problem there.” It’s not Harper who messed up Elias’s head. It’s me.

  “Then what are you looking so worried for?” Ernesto asks me. “Elias got those belts and those world titles from Garrison once, when nobody but the three of us in this room believed he had it in him. He’ll do it again, you wait and see. He’ll get back what’s rightfully his.”

  “He was beaten by a counter puncher with fast hands and fast footwork,” muses Lou.

  “Elias has fast hands, fast feet and fast instincts,” Ernesto reminds us.

  Lou looks weary. “So what the hell happened?” It’s plain to see that he’s taken this defeat as personally as Elias. Ernesto looks at me and Lou. “I’m standing here listening to the both of you and it sounds like you’ve both given up on him.”

  “I haven’t given up on him,” I reply quickly.

  “This fight will go down in history as a huge upset,” says Lou. Ernesto backs away from the wall and sets his coffee cup on the desk. “It wasn’t so long ago that Elias did the impossible and wrested those titles from Garrison. I know it, and you both know it, and everyone with half a brain knows it. Elias was a nobody, just an underdog, and he did the impossible.”

  Lou and I sit there silently. I lap up the pep talk. “I don’t know what happened this time. Sure, Garrison was fitter, thinner, faster and he seemed more prepared, but you’ve been training fighters for so long,” he points at Lou, “and you said it yourself, you haven’t seen anyone with Elias’s hunger to win and the rage that burns inside him. He’ll get it back, just you wait and see.”

  “They will rematch for the IBF, WBA and WBO world titles, and Elias has to win,” declares Lou, as if saying it will make it happen. “I just need to figure out where he went wrong this time.”

  Chapter Fifty-Six

  CALLUM

  * * *

  I venture back into the diner late in the evening. Late enough that there will be less people but early enough for Nina to still be here.

  Luckily for me, she is.

  I’m in my beanie hat and looking scruffy. Some people have noticed me, but I’m not attracting too big of a crowd to worry about. When Nina sees me, and our gazes meet across the room, she freezes. There’s a menu in her hand and it looks like she’s about to come over but because it’s me she stops.

  Another waitress, not her pain-in-the-ass friend, comes over instead and I order my usual milkshake.

  I’m not going to approach her. That’s not the reason I came. I’m still going to give her space, but I wanted to see how she was. I called Harper earlier, to see how Elias was doing. They had only just arrived back from New York. I told her I couldn’t make it to the fight because film stuff got in the way. I was hoping Harper would offer up some news on Nina but I guess they’re firm friends and she’s not about to spill her friend’s news to me.

  Which is admirable, given the industry I’m from and what I’m used to.

  We didn’t get to talk for long because she was unpacking, and Elias had gone out for a run. She wanted to get everything done before he got back.

  “We’ll get together over dinner or something,” she said, “When everything is settled.”

  That would be good, but I wonder when everything will be settled. Judging by the way Nina reacted to seeing me just now, it doesn’t look like anything’s going to be settled any time soon.

  I have a meeting with Rudy, the director and the producer tomorrow. They want me to explain the news story, and why I’ve gone off script with the Alyssa romance.

  I have no idea what I’m going to say.

  Or what they’ll say.

  Rudy says the s
equel for ‘Legend’ is on the fence, due to my ‘not towing the line’.

  I’m not sure how I feel about that. I don’t like being owned or being told how to live my private life. This wouldn’t have been a problem ordinarily, but then Nina happened, and I don’t intend to mess anything up just to fall in line with what the studio says.

  “Here you go.” Frankie delivers my milkshake and sits down. Now this is worth coming here for. She usually has a good old dose of Frankie common sense and wisdom and I’m hoping she’ll enlighten me tonight.

  “Cheers,” I say, lifting the glass in the mid-air. “How about you have one, too?”

  She snorts. “The smell of milkshake doesn’t ever leave me. I’m sick to death of it and all the other food smells that cling to my clothes and get stuck in my pores.”

  “Must be an occupational hazard, constantly smelling food everywhere?”

  “I might have to consider giving this up soon.”

  “And do what?” I ask, smirking. Frankie’s Kitchen is one of the most popular diners in Chicago. She has a good thing going here.

  “That’s just it. What would I do? What are you going to do?” she asks.

  “When I leave? I could ask you to start a franchise and open a place in LA.”

  She opens her eyes with interest. “Keep talking. That sounds like a good idea to me.”

  We joke around, tossing ideas back and forth, as if our new LA diner would be a real thing. I’m not so sure that it can’t exist, even though LA is full of diners, Frankie’s has a certain something.

  Maybe that certain something is Nina.

  “You two fallen out?” Frankie asks, glancing at Nina who has been careful to stay away from where I’m sitting.

  “I’m not sure.”

  “That was a mighty fine thing you did for her last week, standing up for her with that jerk. Has it cost you?”