Damage Control

by Lynn VanDorn

  Tyler’s Comes Full Circle

  July, the next year

  O’Hare Airport

  Chicago, IL

  There were no paparazzi waiting to ambush Tyler when he got past security at O’Hare, which was a good sign, not to mention a huge relief. He collected his suitcase and found the driver he'd hired. No one knew he planned on arriving today. It was so seldom that he got to surprise anyone that Tyler couldn't help but take advantage of the circumstances. He couldn't wait to see everyone’s faces.

  Or one face in particular.

  It had been a month since he and Josh had been within touching distance of each other, and that had been when Josh had flown out to New Zealand to see him. It had only been for four days, but they had been four fucking amazing days. Tyler relived the memories late at night when he couldn't sleep, and made do with what they had until shooting on The Golden Key was concluded: video calls, dirty texts, and the occasional rambling email from Josh, in which he professed his love in the most roundabout way imaginable.

  Tyler—

  I dream of you almost every night, and you're always doing crazy things. Last night you wanted to eat ice cream in the pool and I kept following you around, trying to talk you out of it, when all I wanted to do was fuck you—no pool, no ice cream—but you wouldn't stand still! I woke up aching for you, hard like a horny teenager.

  The house is so quiet without you. Purvi and Kevin come over to keep me company sometimes, and Ethan and Charlie took me to dinner the other day. Oliver misses you. He wanders around meowing, then looks at me like I've hidden you somewhere.

  I went running on the beach after work yesterday and stopped for the sunset. I watched as the sun sank out of sight, heading toward you. I wish I could follow it, but even you might find swimming across the Pacific a challenge.

  Miss you. Come home to me.

  Josh

  Josh followed that up with a texted dick pic of his morning erection. It made Tyler laugh and got him through an otherwise grueling day of filming.

  He fell a little bit more in love with Josh every day. Tyler had progressed past “stupid with love” and had drifted, at some point when he wasn't paying attention, into epic love territory. The kind of love they wrote horrible songs about. The kind of love people dreamed about, but seldom got. The kind of love Tyler wasn't sure he deserved.

  It was one of the many things he talked about with Marilyn, his therapist. They had video sessions three times a week, where Tyler could talk about anything. At first he wasn't sure about it, but had agreed to it to make Josh happy. Now Tyler had gotten to the point where he looked forward to Marilyn’s calls. She listened, didn't judge, and she could be very funny in a sly sort of way that Tyler appreciated.

  She was the one he had first confided in, when the idea came to him.

  “You seem very sure, Tyler.”

  “I am,” he'd said. Then, “Yes, I am, I really am.”

  “And you feel confident this is what you want.”

  “Yes,” he'd said. “Absolutely, yes.”

  Marilyn had gifted him with one of her slow, sweet smiles. “Then it's the right decision.”

  Even so, sitting in the back of the hired car, Tyler was nervous and felt his anxiety level rise. Along with it came that old desire, but he tapped his thigh several times, closed his eyes, and pictured his safe place. He sat on the rough boards of the dock at the lake house, Josh next to him, and they watched the still, blue water. By the time the car paused, stopping at the admission gate of the Chicago Botanic Garden, Tyler felt almost calm.

  Tyler knew right where to go. The Chadwick picnic was held in the same area year after year, just adjacent to the rose garden. This year, for the first time, Peter Chadwick wasn't in attendance. His health was too frail, and he was confined to the hospital bed Ryan had gotten installed for him in the house in Highland Park. If it weren't for that, Tyler would’ve never had the idea to do this, and that would’ve been a shame, because there was a beautiful symmetry to today that pleased Tyler. Ten years had passed since the last Chadwick summer picnic both he and Josh had attended. Tyler wondered what his sixteen-year-old self would think if he could see into the future and see what his twenty-six-year-old self would become.

  Teenaged Tyler would see a somewhat taller version of himself, height added by both the boots he wore and the topknot of blue hair on his head. Young Tyler might notice the scars, but only if he looked very closely. They were fading; slowly, but surely. What Tyler hoped his younger self would see, more than anything else, was his older self’s happiness.

  Things get better, younger me. I promise. Now, just watch this.

  Tyler saw Josh standing with his father, mother, and very pregnant sister. Brad came over and whisked Rachel off to the buffet. Josh’s parents drifted away to talk with a few of the firm’s lawyers and their spouses. Josh stood alone and scanned the crowd.

  Tyler went over, walking quietly, looking only at his target. His hand stole to his pocket and fingered what he had in there. This was real, he reminded himself. As real as it got. Tyler got within an arm's length of Josh when those dark eyes saw him, really saw him, and opened wide with shock.

  “Tyler? I don't…”

  Tyler reached out and touched Josh’s chest, his very solid chest, with one finger.

  “Would you like to take a walk with me?” he asked.

  “Oh my God, when did you get here?”

  Tyler smiled and devoured Josh with his eyes. “Just now. Come on. I want to show you something.”

  Josh reached for Tyler and Tyler danced backward, out of his grasp.

  “Come here, elf! I've missed you. Let me show you how much.”

  That made Tyler grin and back up a few more steps. “Follow me and then you can show me.”

  “Tease,” Josh muttered, but obeyed. “I’d better get to kiss you soon.”

  “I think that can be arranged.”

  Tyler led Josh to the garden’s waterfall, leading him up the winding, shady path, the relative cool a relief after the glaring sunshine. When they got to the top, there were a few people there looking at the magnificent view of shining water framed by verdant trees, but after a short time, they wandered off and left.

  Once they were alone, Josh pulled Tyler to him and kissed him hard. Josh tasted so good. He was everything perfect and wonderful and Tyler could have kissed him forever. If home had a taste, it would've been Josh’s mouth.

  “I missed you, elf.”

  Tyler sucked a ragged breath into his lungs. “I missed you, too. So much. How have you been, Dr. Rosen?”

  “Lonely. Horny. Are you going to explain why we’re here and not California, which would make more sense? I've been wondering for over a week why you decided I needed to be here, of all places. What are you up to?”

  “I'll tell you,” Tyler said, “but first you need to sit down.”

  Josh sat on one of the benches and looked up at Tyler, brows raised.

  “I love you,” Tyler said. “So much more than I ever thought was possible.”

  “Okay, that's good, but I don't know why a trip to Chicago was necessary to tell me this. We could be doing this at home. In bed.”

  “Hush. These past several months with you have been among the happiest of my life. You know that this place is no longer my home.” Tyler paused. “Well, neither is California.”

  Josh’s brow furrowed. “What? Please tell me you don't want to move to New Zealand.”

  Tyler laughed. “God, no. That's not what I meant, but you always manage to distract me, don't you?”

  Josh shrugged. “Turnabout’s fair play.”

  Tyler dropped to one knee.

  “What are you doing?” Josh’s voice caught.

  Tyler’s hand fumbled in his pocket. “What I'm trying to say, badly, is that you are my home, Josh. Wherever I am, wherever you are, I want to always find my way back to you. Forever.”

  “Oh, hell.”

  Tyler frowned. “That wasn't the
response I was hoping for.” He worked the box out of his pocket and held it tightly in his fist.

  “Tyler, you little…” Josh stopped, blinked a few times, then said, “Are you asking me to marry you?”

  Tyler’s frown deepened. This was not at all what he'd imagined. He studied his knee. “Maybe,” he said.

  “My God, Tyler. I’m sorry. I’m doing this all wrong. It’s just that…I thought…”

  Tyler looked up at Josh. “What?” he asked, heart in his throat.

  Josh gave him a crooked smile. “I was going to ask you. I was waiting for our anniversary.”

  “Oh,” Tyler said. “Really?”

  “But this is better, elf.”

  “Yeah?” Tyler asked, knowing his heart had to be in his eyes.

  “Yeah,” Josh answered. “Definitely.”

  Josh hauled Tyler up and then pulled him down until he straddled Josh’s lap. He took Tyler’s face between his beautiful hands and kissed him again, over and over, until Tyler was breathless.

  “Yes,” he whispered into Tyler’s skin. “Yes yes yes, of course, yes.”

  “I bought these,” Tyler said, feeling pleased and ridiculous and thoroughly besotted. He handed the small box to Josh, who braced Tyler with one hand and opened it with the other. Inside were two platinum rings. “The larger one is for you, obviously.”

  Josh wore a grin wide enough to split his face. “Are you going to put it on me?”

  Tyler rolled his eyes, while inside he was turning cartwheels. “I suppose. If you'd like.” He slipped the ring onto Josh’s finger.

  “My turn.” Josh slid the other ring onto Tyler’s finger, then kissed it. “No backing out now.”

  “As if I would. Are you insane? I bought you a ring.” Tyler couldn't believe he’d found his way to this point, but he wished his younger self could see it. “Same goes for you, you know.”

  “Oh, Tyler. You’re never getting rid of me. Haven't you figured that out yet?”

  “How about you spend the rest of our lives proving it to me?” Tyler raised an eyebrow at Josh in his most imperious manner.

  Josh snorted. “How about we spend the rest of our lives proving it to each other?”

  Josh drew Tyler’s head down for another kiss. There was a smattering of applause and a wolf whistle. Both men looked up and saw that they had a small audience: Tyler's mother, Mike, Josh’s parents, Ryan, Brad, and even Rachel, who looked hot, tired, and irritated, but still pleased. She sank onto the bench opposite them and groaned.

  “You just had to propose at the top of a hill, didn't you?” she wheezed. “Never mind that I'm eight months pregnant.”

  Tyler and Josh ignored her.

  “It's a deal,” Tyler told Josh, giddy with love and relief and joy.

  “I'm holding you to that, Tyler Chadwick, even if it takes sixty years,” Josh said, then pulled Tyler down for another kiss.

  The end

  Afterword

  For those who struggle with some of the things described in this book, there are resources available:

  Self-harm:

  http://sioutreach.org/

  Suicide Prevention:

  https://suicidepreventionlifeline.org/

  or call 1-800-273-8255

  Acknowledgements

  I have way too many people to thank/blame for this book. Suzanne, this book would not exist without you. Courtney, Sam, and Sissy, thanks for giving me a chance and for being my cheerleaders. Jood, thank you for holding my hand and helping to keep me sane. Michele, you have been so helpful to me, especially finding me a cover artist! And lastly, Piper, you are sweet and patient and altogether wonderful.

  Eternal thanks to my betas: Su, Courtney, Sam, Sissy, Michele, Brittany, Kyleen, Nick, Melinda, Jill, and Michael. You all helped to make this a better book.

  I owe a huge debt to Amelia and Ed for being two of the nicest people I’ve managed to not yet meet. Thank you for everything.

  Lastly, thanks to you, Constant Reader, for choosing this book and reading it to the end. I can’t express how much it means to me, as a writer, that you stuck with me and my boys for the whole ride. I hope you had a good time.

  About the Author

  Lynn Van Dorn was born in Ohio and left it for the wilds of Chicago in her reckless youth. She wanted to become a fairy princess when she grew up, but since there are few openings for that position, she makes do with being a writer.

  In her spare time, she drinks entirely too much tea, snugs her cats, loves her husband and son, reads voraciously, and avoids housework. She loves to watch anime, travel, knit, bake cookies, and conjure up happy every afters for handsome men who have trouble getting there on their own.

  Visit Lynn’s website to learn more about her books:

  www.lynnvandorn.com

  To be notified when Lynn’s new books become available, you can subscribe to her newsletter:

  https://lynnvandorncom.wordpress.com/newsletter/

  Lynn can be contacted at:

  https://lynnvandorncom.wordpress.com/contact/

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  Thank you for reading Damage Control by Lynn Van Dorn. If you enjoyed this book, please consider leaving a review. Your support means the world to the author!

  Lynn Van Dorn, Chicago, Il, August 2017