Perfect Collision

by Lina Andersson

  “How dare you?”

  “I dare, because you fucked her up, and she’s doing fine now. If you mess with that you’ll never see her again. She’s gonna cut you out of her life. So you better start paying some fucking attention to who she is and not who you’d like her to be.”

  Ella was opening and closing her mouth, staring at him with wide eyes. He could hear her start a sentence, but just then Lisa and Vi came walking over the parking lot. They were both laughing, and Ella had the sense to shut the fuck up.

  She kept her mouth shut while they were having dinner together, as well. It was mostly Lisa talking—about everything. Her internship at a hospital, her boyfriend, and life in general. She asked Vi a lot of questions, too, especially about the tattooing.

  Finally she asked, “Wanna pop my cherry?”

  “What?” Vi asked, staring at her sister.

  “I was thinking a daisy, think you can do that? I know we’re not here for long, but maybe you can squeeze me in tomorrow, if that’s okay with you?”

  Bear’s heart swelled. It was such a nice thing to do, and a great way for Lisa to show she was on her baby sister’s side in this. While the three of them looked at Vi, her face lit up in a beautiful smile.

  “I can! We could make some sketches for it tonight.”

  He left the three of them at the hotel and drove to the clubhouse. Mac soon came over, obviously agitated.

  “Got a text from Vi. Said she’s staying at the hotel with Lisa tonight?”

  “Yeah.” He downed his whiskey. “Lisa’ll look after her, and I told her to text me if something went wrong.”

  Mac nodded and waved to get a beer. “She’ll be fine.”

  “I know.”

  He knew Vi would be fine; he just wasn’t as sure Ella would be.

  “I wanted to check something with you.” Mac cleared his throat. “I got this gift for her…”

  “Christmas present?”

  “No, just to… I just bought her something. I didn’t get her anything for her birthday, since we weren’t talking, and I thought it might be… Fuck! Just to get her mind off her mom.”

  He turned his head and glared at the kid. “It better not be a fucking tattoo.”

  “No! I told you I’d wait. It’s a necklace, but it’s the skull with a top hat, the one we do as a tattoo for Old Ladies. I thought I’d give it to her now… before. I know we haven’t been together for long, but I want her to have some kind of mark.”

  “That’s okay.” It was a good idea. Sensible, but still proved he was serious.

  I might be pussy-like of Mac to buy Vi a necklace just to make her feel better, but as long as the kid was behaving like a pussy for the sake of his baby girl, he wasn’t going to give him a too hard time about it. At least not until Vi’d had the necklace. Besides, the others would do it for him. They were already giving Mac a hard time about how he was with Vi. Comments like ‘did you get your girlfriend home in time for curfew’ were flying around the clubhouse. Mac didn’t seem to mind too much, though.

  “I just wanted to make sure you’re okay with it. Would hate to beat you up in the ring in front of your daughter.”

  “Kid, I’ve got over sixty pounds and thirty years of experience on you—you wouldn’t stand a chance. But I don’t mind the necklace. I like it.”

  “Good,” Mac said and looked over his shoulder. “I’m gonna go talk to Mitch. I’ll see you later.”

  “Yeah.”

  He watched the kid stalk away. It was a really nice gift, and he knew Vi would love it. As far as he was concerned, it was a lot fucking better than ink. If Mac’d asked him about ink Vi after two months with her, he wouldn’t even had bothered with the ring, he would’ve just decked him. That was not being serious, that was being in a hurry.

  -o0o—

  I couldn’t believe it! My sister was going to let me ink her; her very first tattoo! When we’d been working on the sketch the evening before. I’d asked her if she wanted it in color, and she’d said she obviously wanted it violet.

  It’d been a great night, and Mom’d stayed out of our way. I had no idea what Dad’d said to her, but it had apparently been enough to make sure she left me alone. No comments, no remarks, no nothing.

  Lisa’d been… I wasn’t sure what she’d been, but I’d had a good time. According to her, it was mostly that the age difference didn’t matter as much anymore. She also said it was the fact that I didn’t seem to hate her anymore. I could see why she’d thought I did, but I never hated her. It was more that she was so unlike me, and it didn’t seem to matter as much anymore. Back then, it was probably me being jealous, too. That Mom loved her. Even if I didn’t really like Mom, she was still my mom, and…

  I didn’t tell Lisa that part, though.

  We’d had fun, and now we were at Wicked Ink, getting ready for her first tattoo. Chris was sitting next to us, and Lisa’d been flirting with him the entire time, just like all girls did. Something Joe obviously found hilarious, since I could hear him laughing all the way from the kitchen. Chris didn’t seem to mind, but he was used to it.

  Lisa kept talking. She’d pretty much been talking since she arrived, but this time it didn’t annoy me as much as it used to. On occasion, she asked me questions in her usual, very direct, way. She was always extremely direct and very honest. It was sometimes stressful, but also refreshing. You never had to wonder what she really meant; it was always obvious. As soon as Christ left us, she started on the questions.

  “So, you and Mac?”

  “Yeah…” I’d been waiting for it and had been a bit surprised it hadn’t come up the night before.

  “He’s the good brother,” she continued. “I think he’s the better looking, too. Most girls like Mitch better, but it’s more that he has charisma and the bad boy attitude. Mac has an angst about him, some girls think it’s a turn-off, but I like him. I got along better with Mitch, he’s easier to be around, but if I had to choose it would’ve been Mac. He’s the good guy, and Mitch is the heartbreaker.”

  I wasn’t sure what to say, so I kept drawing, and Lisa kept talking. The really good thing with talking to Lisa was that you didn’t actually have to, like, talk. She did it for you. It was quite possible to just keep your mouth shut, and let her have the conversation with herself.

  “She’s gonna get over it. Mom, I mean,” she clarified. “She’s mostly looking for reasons to yell at Dad.”

  I didn’t fully agree, but hesitated to tell her. I thought Mom wanted to be all over my ass, as always. Then I decided to just tell her.

  “Mom never really left the age when you’re all wrapped up in yourself. It’s all about her. She doesn’t like that I want different things than she does. Also, she can’t accept that I’m not like you, that my head works the way it does.”

  Lisa laughed. “Mom is good in some ways, she’s just not good with problems. When she doesn’t understand things she pretends they don’t exist. She doesn’t understand your problems, so she pretends they don’t exist.”

  “And she treated me like she treated you and got even more pissed when it didn’t work.”

  “That’s probably true,” Lisa said. “Did you know I talk to Dad every week?”

  “Yeah.” I knew it, but I hardly ever asked him about it. He kept me updated, though. Just how she was doing, but not much more than that.

  “He’s so proud of you.”

  “He’s proud of you, too, Lisa.”

  “I know, that’s not it. We’ve talked a lot about you and him, and I understand more about you now. Mom refuses to listen to me about it, and Dad tends to build a wall around you to protect you. That, in combination with you and her being like oil and water, doesn’t help when it comes to her getting to know or understand you.”

  I hadn’t thought about it in that way, but still. “She never really cared to find out.”

  “No, I’m just saying it was a bad combination. She denied there being a problem, she never made an effort to try to underst
and you, and Dad didn’t force it down her throat.”

  “He shouldn’t have had to.” I felt a need to defend Dad, maybe because I knew she had a small point, and I didn’t really want to admit it out loud. “And he protected me because she refused to even try to understand.”

  “I know, honey,” Lisa said and turned around. “I’m sorry. I didn’t mean to upset you. I know Mom is in complete denial about you. She’s still talking about you going to college, and I know it’s not going to happen. I know you hate school, and this tattooing thing—I know you’re gonna be awesome at it. You’ve found your place. I know enough about people like you to know that once they find their place, it’s gonna work out for them. I want things to work out for you. That’s all Dad wants, too. I think Mom just can’t admit Dad was right all along.”

  “Probably.” I still didn’t agree, but I didn’t want to argue about it. It didn’t matter anymore.

  “And this is really awesome. You’re making living art, honey. It’s so cool.”

  “Yeah, but you’re gonna save lives.” She was gonna be a great doctor if she managed to keep quiet and listen to the patients, but I think she did. At least I hope she did.

  When Chris came back she blushed! Lisa! She never blushed, and I leaned over the stencil of the outlines I was working on to not have to look at her. I wasn’t blind, I knew Chris was hot, but I still didn’t understand why every girl, including my own sister, behaved like a twelve-year-old when he was around.

  “A co-worker lost her dad, she was really broken up about it and then she got a tattoo for him,” Lisa said, and she was almost stuttering! “She said it was such a way for her to pay respect. From that perspective, you’ll help people, too. I’m guessing those kind of tattoos are really common.”

  “Among the first timers it sure is,” Chris said, then leaned over me to look at my sketch. “It looks good. Got a plan?”

  He meant if I had a plan how to ink it, shading, the different layers, and colors—and I nodded.

  I placed the stencil on Lisa once it was done. She wanted it on the back of her shoulder, and she approved of the placement.

  A couple of hours of constant chatter later, she looked into the mirror, and I seriously saw tears in her eyes.

  “Oh, Vi. This is so great. My sister did a tattoo on me!” She caught me in a hug. “I’m gonna want a flower garden back there, so you better keep practicing. I love you, girl.”

  When Chris left us again, and I was taping the plastic on her, I cleared my throat.

  “He’s not single.”

  “Neither am I, but look at that ass!” Lisa replied.

  “No!”

  “Sorry,” she laughed. “But he is hawt!”

  “Yeah, most girls seem to think so.”

  It just made her laugh; she didn’t seem to mind

  Later that night, all of us, including Dad, went to dinner. He took me to the side to make sure I was okay, and once again said all I had to do was text, and he’d come and get me. He followed us to the hotel, and I assumed it was to talk to Mom.

  Around ten, I walked into Mom’s room alone. Dad would probably freak, but I needed to talk to her, and since she was leaving the next day, it was my last chance to be alone with her. She was on the bed, reading.

  “Hi, Mom.”

  “Hey…” she said and put down the book. She patted on the bed, and I sat down.

  It was strange. A woman I’d lived with for so long, my own mom, and I really had nothing to say to her. I couldn’t even say for sure if I loved her. I came from her, half of me was her, and she was still… like an alien from another planet.

  “This thing with you and Mac,” she started, “I’m not gonna lie and tell you I’m okay with it, but I’m gonna back off.”

  “Like you really had a choice,” I mumbled. “I’m eighteen, and you wouldn’t be able to prove we did anything before I turned eighteen, since we didn’t.”

  “Really? You wanna do this the hard way? By lying to me?”

  “I’m not lying to you, and is there any other way than the hard way when we talk? You’re saying you’re gonna back off, but I assume the next thing you’ll do is give me a long list of why you don’t like it.”

  “He’s a twenty-four-year old Marauder, and you’re an eighteen-year-old girl. He’s your first boyfriend. Is he really the kind of guy you want to spend the rest of your life with?”

  I had promised myself I wouldn’t care if she was an ass. That I’d just have this talk and be done with it. I quickly changed my mind to consider it a win if I managed to wait with the crying until I left her room. Which would mean the best choice of action would be to not answer her. I just didn’t feel like it. I’d had enough.

  “Mom, don’t do this. Really don’t. The only thing that’ll happen is that I’ll like you even less, and you didn’t have much going for you to begin with.”

  I’d never talked to Mom in that way. I’d never told her how I really felt about her, but I’d had it. Really had it.

  Mac and my job made me happy. If she seriously wanted to take away two things that made me happy, I didn’t want her as my mom—or in my life at all. There was no point to it.

  “I just want you to see there’s more to life than Greenville and the damn club.”

  “Like what? College?” I asked, but didn’t let her answer. “I can just barely read, Mom. I can’t go to college.”

  “You can read, you’d do fine!”

  “No, Mom! Please accept it. I can hardly read, and my writing is even worse. How do you expect me to take an exam?!” I was yelling now, and crying, too. “I have ADD and dyslexia. You denying it or pretending I don’t isn’t going to change it. I’m not lazy!”

  Mom glared at me and it took a while before she opened her mouth.

  “I can’t fucking believe your dad agreed to this. Tattooing or Mac.”

  I closed my eyes and exhaled. I felt fresh tears running down my cheeks. I had no idea what I’d hoped for. Probably that it would be different this time, but she would never understand. She would never admit that… I was who I was. Simply since she didn’t want to. Instead of trying to tell her, maybe it was better to just stop trying and cut my losses. But it was hard to do when what I lost was my mom, no matter what kind of a mom she was.

  I opened my eyes and looked at her. I couldn’t help myself. I tried.

  “Because he loves me, and he wants me to be happy.”

  “No, because he wants you to be his little girl and stay with him forever, and to keep you from me.”

  I didn’t even know what to say to that. I wasn’t sure how to argue with a person who thought every decision everyone ever made had to do with her. Or at least that every decision Dad ever made was designed to piss her off.

  “He’s not keeping me from you. You’re the one pushing me away.” I said with a sigh. “I’ll see you tomorrow.”

  “Honey…” she started.

  “No. I’ll see you tomorrow, Mom.”

  I went outside and was surprised to see Lisa waiting for me in the hallway. She took me in her arms and hugged me tight, but didn’t say anything. We just hugged each other.

  -o0o—

  Mac knew Ella wouldn’t come to the clubhouse, but Lisa would, and he wanted to see her before she left. He could hear her before she even entered the building, and then she came walking in with a laugh. Lisa wasn’t the kind of person who walked into a room unnoticed. She made sure everyone knew she was in the house. She went over to older members first, as the custom was, and he grabbed Vi for a few seconds.

  “You okay?” he asked.

  “Yeah,” she nodded. “Mom’s still at the hotel, we’re gonna take her and Lisa to the airport later, but Dad said he could drop me off at your place on the way back.”

  “I’ll be there,” he said and gave her a kiss. “So, no problem with your mom?”

  “Not really. Nothing unusual at least.” She looked at Wolf who waved at her. “I’m gonna go talk to Wolf. I’ll see yo
u later.”

  Vi hadn’t even reached Wolf before Lisa came towards him with a big smile.

  “Hey, girl,” Mac said and gave her a hug. “How are you?”

  “Good. Working a lot, school is tough, but I like it.”

  “Bet you’re breaking the hearts of doctors.”

  “Nah. Speaking of breaking hearts, how’s your brother?”

  He couldn’t help laughing. “Still breaking hearts.”

  “So, still a manwhore?”

  “Definitely.”

  “Who’s a manwhore?” Mitch asked when he came up to them and gave Lisa a long hug.

  “You really have to ask?” she said.

  “No, guess not,” he chuckled. “Heard you did some ink, flash it!”

  Lisa took off her shirt and pulled down the strap of her camisole.

  “Fuck, she’s getting good at this,” Mitch mumbled as he looked closer.

  “Yeah.” Mac took a closer look, too. It was well done with sharp, even lines and great coloring. “She was really happy you asked.”

  “Thought I should encourage her and pick a side without yelling at Mom,” she said and looked at Mac. “You better be good to her. You know I’ll maim you if you’re not.”

  “I know.” He might laugh at her comment, but he knew she meant it. She was always quick on taking revenge, and it often got violent. He’d been lucky; it was mostly Mitch who ended up getting hurt.

  “I’m serious, Mac. She’s had enough shit, so you better be good to her.”

  “No offense, but I’m more worried about what Bear would do.”

  “She’s a doc. She can kill you and revive you over and over,” Mitch said and when Mac stared at him he shrugged. “Just thought it should be mentioned.”

  “I could,” Lisa said with a big smile. “Or have Dad work on you and just stick around to make sure you lived for a really long time while he did.”

  “Thanks,” he muttered. “I feel so much better now.”

  “I know you’ll be nice,” Lisa laughed. “Show me the Baxter family ink.”

  He unbuttoned his shirt and showed her.

  “Really nice!” she mumbled as she studied it. “Did you get one, too, Mitch?”

  “Nope.”