Rose Farm Trilogy Boxset

by Kennedy, Brenda

  He walks past me and gets into the pickup parked on the other side of the street. I recognize him as Savannah Mae’s ex-husband. He was at Megan Rose’s funeral, and Pops and Momma introduced us.

  When he drives away, I chance a look inside the diner. It seems empty. I tap my fingers on the steering wheel and try to decide whether I should go in or leave. Main Street is empty; it’s a typical Sunday in this small town. If I don’t go in, I defeat my purpose of coming to see her. The reason I wanted to see her was because Sawyer Jackson said she was sad.

  I decide to go in. The bell over the door chimes to alert the employees that a customer has arrived.

  “Take a seat, the waitress will be right with you.” The cook is standing at the serving window wearing a white chef’s hat.

  “Thank you.” Walking into the empty diner, I decide to take a seat furthest from where she was talking to her ex-husband. I pick up the plastic menu and pretend to browse it. Suddenly, I feel like my tie is choking me. I should have changed first. Maybe this wasn’t such a good idea.

  When I stand to leave, Savannah Mae comes out of the bathroom. Her hair is pulled into a high ponytail, and her eyes are red and puffy. She fidgets with her white work apron before she sees me.

  “Looks like you’re leavin’, Abel Lee.”

  “Nope, just getting here.” I sit down and loosen the noose, otherwise known as my tie, around my neck.

  “Coffee?”

  “Yes, please.” I turn the coffee cup over and wait.

  She shows up with a pot of fresh coffee. She says as she looks at the coffee as she fills the cup, “I’m surprised to see you here today.”

  “Why’s that?”

  “It looks like you’re just gettin’ out of the church. Didn’t you stay for the potluck?”

  I move the cup of coffee closer to me and say, “I did. I saw your sister and Sawyer Jackson; she said you were working today.”

  She looks sad as she stares at the coffee pot she’s holding. “I had to pick up an extra shift this week, and this was the only one available.”

  “Looks like a slow day.”

  “It’s Sunday. Sundays are always slow. ‘most everyone goes to church and then stays for the potluck.” She looks around the empty diner. “Are you havin’ lunch?”

  “No, just coffee.”

  “Let me put this back on the warmer, and I’ll be back to check on you.”

  She turns to leave and I reach my hand to stop her.

  “Savannah Mae?” She stops and looks at me. “Is everything all right?”

  “No.”

  Savannah Mae

  I walk away and set the coffee pot back on the warmer, and just stand there with my back to Abel Lee. My hands shake and I make a fist in each hand in an attempt to stop the shakin’. When he asked was everything all right, why didn’t I just smile and say yes? Because it would’ve been a lie. Sometimes a lie is better than the truth. Right? Not accordin’ to my Mom. “It’s better to always tell the truth,” she always says.

  “Savannah Mae?” a deep husky voice murmurs behind me. Why didn’t I just lie to him? I turn around and Abel Lee is standin’ closer than what I expected. I tilt my head back to look up at him.

  “Come and talk to me.”

  “I can’t. I’m workin’ in case you can’t tell.” I lift the bottom of my apron so he can see that I’m in my work uniform. I’m hopin’ a little humor will help. I even add a small smile. It’s the only smile I’m capable of.

  I see a hint of a smile. “I’m not leaving here until you talk to me.”

  I’m at work. I don’t want to discuss my problems with him, especially here. I think about the conversation Ethan and I had just before Abel Lee got here. My eyes begin to tear up. “I can’t.” I close my eyes and I can feel a single tear roll down my cheek.

  Next, I feel a large hand behind my head, pulling’ me into him. His chest is broad and muscular and hard. I don’t pull away, I lean into him instead, restin’ my face against his body. I hear his heartbeat and I feel safe. Why do I feel safe? I barely know him.

  “Tonight. I’ll be over tonight, and we’ll talk then.”

  I can only nod. I’m afraid to say anything. I’m afraid the tears will start and the waterworks won’t stop. The bell over the door rings, alertin’ us of a customer. Abel Lee kisses the top of my head before he releases me. I turn around with my back to the restaurant and stare at the coffee pot, willin’ my tears to go away. When the bell rings again, I know Abel Lee is gone.

  After work, I go home and find that my sister, Samantha Marie, has already bathed Sawyer Jackson. He is dressed in his Thomas the Train pajamas that Santa got him.

  “I missed you,” he says, jumpin’ up in my arms.

  “Oh, Buddy. I missed you, too. Were you good for Aunt Sammie?”

  “Yep. We went to church, played games, and I even had a bath. Smell,” he says, lowerin’ his head for me.

  I inhale deeply and I agree he does smell good.

  “Thank you for keepin’ him for me.”

  Samantha Marie gathers her coat and purse. “I love watchin’ him.”

  She leaves, and Sawyer Jackson and I play for awhile before bed. We both have milk and cookies. I remember the gift that Abel Lee got him for Christmas. “I have another gift for you.”

  “From Santa?” he asks.

  “No, this one’s from Abel Lee. He brought it over for you.” I stand and walk into the bedroom to get it. When I return, Sawyer Jackson is at the table smiling. “Here ya go, Buddy.”

  He eagerly takes it and smiles. I watch as he tears the wrapper off of the white box. He removes the box lid and smiles even bigger when he reveals a beautiful shiny harmonica. “This is so cool.”

  Sawyer Jackson removes the new harmonica and blows in it. I take the box and try to read the instructions that came with it. It might as well be written in a foreign language. Sawyer Jackson continues to inhale and exhale into the instrument. It’s the worst soundin’ thing I think I’ve ever heard. Abel Lee’s words come back to me. “You may want to hold off on the gratitude.”

  We finish our cookies and milk. “You can play with it more tomorrow,” I say, placing the noise maker, aka the harmonica, back into the box.

  “I wanna play it now,” he says.

  “Tomorrow.” I wanna tell him he can play it all day long to Abel Lee, but I don’t. Sawyer Jackson says his prayers before bed and he falls asleep quickly. The house feels colder than usual, so I add another log to the fire and adjust the furnace. I shower quickly and dress in a pair of sweats and an Ohio State hoodie.

  I hear the creakin’ sound of the wooden front porch, and it alerts me that Abel Lee is here before he knocks.

  When I open the door, he’s standin’ there and holdin’ an Adornetto’s pizza and salad. There’s nothin’ better than a salad and pizza from Adornetto’s. “Hey, come on in.” I hold the door open wide for him. He’s wearin’ jeans, boots, and a black leather coat.

  “I brought dinner.” He smiles and holds up the pizza box.

  “I can see that, thank you.”

  He takes the food into the kitchen while I lock up behind him.

  “I hope you like pepperoni,” he asks from the other room. “I covered the pizza box with my coat to help hold in the heat. My coat will smell good for the next few days.”

  When I get into the kitchen, he’s already removin’ the salads from the bag.

  “I do like pepperoni.” Adornetto’s has the best food around. I reach up into the cabinet and remove two plates. “Water or pop? I don’t have any beer to offer you, sorry.”

  “Not much of a pop drinker, water’s fine.”

  We take the plates and walk into the livin’ room to eat. I sit on the floor, in front of the fireplace, tryin’ to get warm. Abel Lee sits on the chair nearest the door. He opens my pop and his water before he begins to eat.

  “I gave Sawyer Jackson your gift you got him tonight.” I just watch him.

  He smiles sli
ghtly. “Did he like it?”

  I watch as he takes a bite of his pizza. “He did. A noise maker huh? When did you think that would be a good gift for a four-year-old?”

  He laughs, “‘A noise maker?’ Is that what you think that is?”

  “Sure didn’t sound much like music.”

  He leans up in his chair. “I was afraid of that. I’m sorry.”

  “Don’t be. It’s pretty nice. Doesn’t look much like a toy.”

  “It’s not. It’s a real harmonica. Maybe when he’s older, he’ll be able to learn to play it.”

  Halfway through the meal he asks, “So, are you going to tell me what’s going on?”

  Looking up at him, I say, “Abel Lee, you don’t want to hear about my problems.”

  “Sure I do.” He wipes his mouth off with his napkin and leans back into the chair.

  I shake my head. “You’re gonna regret this.”

  He rests his arm on the back of the chair in an attempt to get comfortable. “Something’s bothering you and I want to know what it is.”

  I tell him briefly about my marriage and catchin’ Ethan kissing Heather Sue last year at her birthday party. I also tell him about Ethan denying it and about our divorce.

  “He pays child support?”

  “We agreed to handle the child support outside of court. He helps me out whenever he can.”

  Abel Lee nods.

  “The other day, he told me that he and Heather Sue are gettin’ married. Isn’t that something? His life moves on as if he’s never been affected by our marriage or the divorce.” I take a deep breath. “While I’m sittin’ here, not really sure how to get my own life together, let alone my son’s life.”

  “I’m sorry.”

  “Me, too. We live in a small town and as soon as word gets out about the upcomin’ weddin’, people will start talkin’ — more than they already are.” I think for a minute and say, “It’s Sawyer Jackson that I’m worried about.”

  He leans up in the chair and rests his elbows on his knees. “When’s the wedding?”

  “He didn’t say, and I didn’t ask. It’s not fair that he destroyed our life together, and he gets to move on and be happy.” I close my eyes and pray this is just a dream. Sayin’ it out loud only makes it even more painful.

  “Do you still love him?”

  I open my eyes and he’s watchin’ me. Do I still love him? “No, not anymore. I’m an old-fashioned girl. You get only one chance to hurt me. The night I saw him kissin’ her, that was it. I do miss the thought of havin’ a family.” I wipe away the single tear. “I’m sad that Sawyer Jackson won’t have his dad around. I feel sorry that my son will be missing out on so many things. He didn’t ask for this, and he doesn’t deserve the struggles that we face.”

  “Is he still giving you money?”

  “He came into work today and gave me some. He said work’s slow, but he gave me what he had. My biggest fear is that he’ll stop payin’ me altogether.” I think for a moment and say, “That’s a lie. My biggest fear is he’ll move on and forget about our son.”

  Abel Lee

  I watch as Savannah Mae breaks down in front of me. She tells me personal moments in her life and her worst fears. I doubt she has ever told anyone about this, other than her family. She fidgets with her hands before looking at the fireplace. I watch as she stands to add another log to the fire. She looks at me and smiles. It’s not a real smile. “Bet you wish you never asked.” She sits down on the couch and tucks her legs under her. “I’m a bit of a mess.”

  “I wouldn’t say that.”

  She laughs. “Really.”

  I wish I knew what to say to her. I wish I had the right words. “I see a strong, beautiful girl.” She shakes her head, but I don’t stop. “I also see a fighter.” I look her in the eyes. “I know a lot of women who would have overlooked a cheating husband. Ignored it, as if they didn’t see it.”

  She watches me with big eyes. “Really?”

  “Sure do. They would rather stay in a bad relationship because it’s easier, only to be cheated on again and again. Not a lot of women would have done what you did — stand up for something you believe in.” I watch her as she takes in my words. “It may not be easy, but you’ll get where you need to be. And one more thing.” She watches me. “If that ex of yours was stupid enough to cheat on someone like you, he’ll surely do it again.”

  She doesn’t say anything. I stand and walk into the kitchen to leave her with her thoughts. I put the pizza and the extra salad in the fridge.

  “Thank you, Abel Lee.”

  I close the refrigerator door and turn around.

  “I didn’t think it was possible, but I feel better. I have always second guessed myself for my decision. I wondered if I should have stayed because it would have been easier, or stayed for Sawyer Jackson’s benefit.”

  I interrupt, “And you shouldn’t have.”

  “I know that now. Thanks to you.”

  “You’re better than that. It may not seem like you’re moving on, but you are.” I look at the wall clock hanging over the door. “I should leave. Momma wouldn’t be happy if I kept a beautiful girl awake.”

  I watch as her face lights up with a smile. “Do you always do what your momma wants?”

  “Yes, ma’am. Always been a good rule to live by. Never wanna disappoint your momma.”

  She walks me to the door. I don’t open it until I’m ready to leave.

  “Thank you, Abel Lee.”

  “Savannah Mae.” I look down at her and take a deep breath. “Would you like to go out with me on New Year’s Eve?” We’ve been hanging out lately, and I think it’s time I asked her out on a real date.

  “I’m sorry, I can’t. It’s my holiday to have Sawyer Jackson.” Oh yes, the divorce stipulations or maybe this is a polite way for her to say no.

  “If I can arrange the best sitter in town to babysit, would you go to the American Legion with me in Roseville and bring in the New Year, country style?”

  She laughs. “In country style?”

  “In country style,” I repeat. Because country style is a style of its own.

  “Abel Lee, if you can get a sitter for Sawyer Jackson on New Year’s Eve, I’ll be happy to go out with you.”

  The way she said that sounds like it will be almost impossible to do. How hard is it to find a sitter on New Year’s Eve?

  “Good, I’ll be in touch.”

  “And not just any babysitter,” she adds.

  “No, ma’am. Wouldn’t dream of leaving your son with just anyone.” I open the door and say, “Good night, Savannah Mae.”

  “Good night, Abel Lee.”

  When I get home, I take my guitar and head out to the barn. Bluebelle and Colonel are standing at the stall door. “Hey, girl, did you miss me?” I stroke her and feed her a few sugar cubes.

  Colonel stands there and patiently waits his turn. It’s probably the only time I’ve ever seen him calm. I cautiously raise my hand to pet him. He moves slightly but allows me to stroke his nose. “I didn’t forget about you, ole boy.”

  Colonel takes the sugar cubes from my hands and eats them. I walk over and prop myself on the hay bales that sit in the corner of the barn. I form chords, strum the strings, and play a few songs from Garth Brooks and Blake Shelton. I think of Savannah Mae and our possible date on New Year’s Eve.

  The next morning at breakfast, I ask Momma about their plans for New Year’s Eve. She tells me that she and Pops will be going to the American Legion. “What’s on your mind?” she asks.

  “If I was looking for a babysitter, where would I find one?”

  “Abel, you got a child out there we don’t know about?”

  I quickly shake my head. “No Ma’am, no kids. I was thinking about taking Savannah Mae to the Legion for New Year’s.”

  “Findin’ child care on New Year’s Eve can be almost impossible.” She looks at Pops and says, “But I do know that Mia and Levi are stayin’ in that night. With her b
ein’ pregnant, they don’t want to be out in a crowd.”

  Mia? She’s friends with Savannah Mae. I think this might work. “Do you think she would watch Sawyer Jackson?”

  “I can’t say. You can always call her and ask.”

  I make plans to call Mia later. “I’ll do that, thank you.” Pops and I head out to talk to the township about purchasing the old Rose Farm school.

  Later that night, Mia and Levi come over for dinner. They called Momma and Pops and said they had something to talk to them about. I feel like it’s important, but Momma and Pops don’t say anything.

  At dinner, Mia begins to talk about the pregnancy. It looks like she is about to cry and Levi holds her hands. Momma, Pops, and I stop eating and give them our undivided attention.

  “As you know,” Levi says, “Mia had a test done to see if she’s at risk of carrying a baby with Down syndrome.”

  “This was the routine test they do with your pre-natal care?” Momma asks.

  Mia nods, but doesn’t say anything. Levi says in a shaky voice, “The test revealed that Mia is at risk and the baby may have Down syndrome.”

  I run through my mind all of the things that I know about the syndrome. It’s not hereditary, and Mia isn’t over the age of 35 to put the baby at risk. The severity of the syndrome varies. I soon realize that I know very little about it. “Are they certain?” I ask.

  Mia tries to smile. “Just because I’m at risk, doesn’t mean the baby has it.”

  Levi explains they did a blood test and Mia had some abnormal blood levels that indicated the baby may have Down syndrome.

  “Are there more tests they can do so you know for sure?” Pops asks.

  Mia pipes up, “There are.”

  Levi looks at Mia and says, “We talked about it, and whatever the test reveals won’t change anything. Mia’s pregnant and we’re thrilled about it. If our child has Down syndrome, we’ll still love him or her and we’ll take care of her, no matter what.”