A Heart Once Broken

by Jerry S. Eicher

Lydia ignored the comment and studied Sandra’s cast instead. “Which leg goes out first?”

  Sandra chuckled. “I don’t think I have it figured out. I haven’t been in a buggy since the wedding.”

  “I know. We’ve missed you at the youth gatherings,” Lydia said. “But let’s get you out of here so we can talk.”

  With an energetic jump Sandra was on the buggy step, and with Lydia’s hand on one arm and a crutch in the other, she soon made it to the ground.

  “Is Clyde here yet?” Mark called out.

  Lydia shook her head and kept her hand on Sandra’s arm as they worked their way toward the front porch.

  “How do you get around at home with the cooking and cleaning?” Lydia asked.

  Sandra sighed. “Mamm comes over to wash on Mondays, and she bakes some things. But the rest of the time I get by with a knee walker in the kitchen. Mark’s a goot sport too.”

  “I feel so sorry for you,” Lydia said as she helped Sandra with the stairs and guided her to a chair on the front porch.

  “Don’t you need to help with dinner?” Sandra asked.

  “No. Emma and Rhoda have their penance coming for a stunt they pulled this morning. Mamm has them both in the kitchen working hard, and your mamm should be here before long.”

  “Stunt?” The interest showed on Sandra face. “I knew I needed to come over here to cheer myself up.”

  “Don’t encourage them,” Lydia said. “It’s been a rough morning, and you can’t imagine the half.”

  “Really? What happened?”

  “It’s Thanksgiving Day,” Lydia said. “I’m trying to stay thankful, but I can see no blessing in what has happened so far this morning.”

  “You had best tell me.” Sandra reached for Lydia’s hand.

  Lydia paused to look around. “Emma and Rhoda made an early breakfast for their Englisha friends. They brought Rudy along.”

  “Rudy!” Sandra’s mind spun. “But that’s all in the past.”

  Lydia didn’t look at her. “That’s what I thought.”

  Sandra searched for words. “But that’s not possible. You’re a church member now, so that’s the end of the story.”

  “I know,” Lydia deadpanned. “But Rudy wouldn’t take no for an answer. He thinks something can work out between us again.”

  “So you spoke at length with him…about…love?” Sandra didn’t try to hide the tremor in her voice. “Lydia, how could you?”

  Lydia hung her head. “It just happened, and I couldn’t figure out why Mamm or Daett didn’t stop it. I mean, we walked out to the pasture together when he arrived, and we washed dishes together after breakfast.”

  Sandra leaned forward to fan herself, even as the wind moved briskly across the front porch. “Wow. And I thought I had troubles. But why did your parents say nothing? That’s the first question.”

  “They’re trying to go soft on Emma and Rhoda.”

  “But Englisha friends in the house? How could they?”

  Lydia shrugged. “It happened.”

  Sandra looked down the lane as Amos and Mamm pulled in the driveway with Clyde’s buggy behind them. “Lydia, you have to put a stop to this! At once!”

  “I will…and I did. But you can’t tell anyone, not even your mamm.”

  “I won’t,” Sandra promised. “But tell me. You wouldn’t…you couldn’t…”

  “Jump the fence?” Lydia managed to laugh. “I don’t think so.”

  Sandra groaned and gripped the side of her chair. “And here I was going to ask your mamm if she would take me in after Mark is wed.”

  “You won’t want to do that,” Lydia said. “Mamm and Daett will get themselves in trouble with the church soon, if I don’t miss my guess. My sisters aren’t stopping this kind of nonsense, and my parents seem incapable of doing anything about it.”

  “What is to become of us?” Sandra whispered.

  Lydia laughed out loud. “I guess we could move in together somewhere.”

  Sandra began to speak, but Mamm called across the lawn. “Goot morning, girls. How are you both doing?”

  “Just fine.” Lydia smiled and rose to her feet as her Aunt Edna hurried up the walk toward them.

  Sandra stayed frozen to her seat. She couldn’t have moved even if her foot had been free of its cast.

  Chapter Nineteen

  Sandra joined in the laughter around the table as Aunt Mary’s Thanksgiving dinner progressed. The prayer had been said and the turkey had been cut. The potatoes and gravy were still steaming after being passed around the table. The men had their plates piled high with food.

  Across the table Lydia still had a hint of sorrow on her face, but the rest of the family appeared to have not a concern in the world. Had Sandra heard Lydia correctly that her parents tolerated Englisha friends in their house and that Lydia herself might consider resuming her relationship with Rudy? This seemed so impossible, almost like a dream. How had things come to this point?

  Her thoughts were interrupted when Clyde leaned across the table to whisper, “How’s your leg healing?”

  “Okay, I guess,” Sandra said, trying to be civil on Thanksgiving.

  “Have you been back to the doctor lately?” Clyde asked.

  Sandra wanted to ignore him, but she knew that would create its own scene. She forced herself to answer, “No, but everything should be okay until the cast comes off.”

  “How long yet?” Clyde continued.

  “I don’t remember exactly,” Sandra said. “It’s written down at home on my doctor’s file.”

  Clyde grinned. “My, aren’t we privileged? You have your own doctor’s file.”

  Sandra glared at him. “It’s a little folder and it keeps me organized.”

  “I was just teasing.” Clyde’s eyes twinkled as he spoke.

  The man wanted to get under her skin, and she had allowed him to. Sandra concentrated on the food on her plate.

  Amos’s voice soon boomed, “I think Mary has outdone herself this morning, and Lydia too. This is excellent, excellent eating.”

  Lydia’s mamm colored and protested at once. “You don’t have to say that, Amos. I’m sure Edna can match anything I’ve made today. But thank you for the compliment.”

  “You’re right about Edna. She’s already fattened me since the wedding,” Amos declared with a firm pat on his stomach. “All this goot eating has me working night and day to shed the pounds.”

  Sandra kept her head down as the conversation continued around the table. Lydia’s daett soon cleared his throat and announced, “Since it’s Thanksgiving Day, and the meal is almost over, maybe we should go around the table and share why our hearts are lifted up in thanks to the Lord.”

  “That’s a great idea!” Amos boomed. “And I don’t have to look far for that answer. My dear Edna, who is by my side this very moment, has brought great joy and gladness to my heart. The happiness I feel is unlike anything I’ve experienced in a very long time. My walk these past years had been a lonely one, and I thought at times the road would never end. But the Lord has seen fit to bring Edna’s love to me, and for that I am very thankful indeed.” Amos choked a bit, but managed to end with, “That’s all I have to say.”

  “I would have expected nothing else,” Lydia’s daett chimed in. “Edna’s sister, my Mary, has been a great blessing to my life. Even in this dark time we’re going through, she has been a light by my side. I’m very thankful for her and I know that the road ahead may still lead us through troubled waters, but I’ll always encourage my heart with the knowledge that we had this lovely Thanksgiving today, together with our family.”

  “Don’t be so gloomy about things,” Amos said. “We’ll stand with you and try to help out where we can. I’m sure Deacon Schrock will have the church give the support that’s needed.”

  Lydia’s daett wasn’t speaking entirely of financial difficulties, Sandra told herself. So Lydia had been correct; her parents had grown soft on Emma and Rhoda. Chills ran up and down Sandra’s ba
ck.

  “And how about you, dear?” Amos asked Edna.

  Sandra jumped in her chair and focused on Mamm, who looked up at Amos with a warm smile. “You know I’m thankful for you, Amos. You have a very kind heart.”

  “Oh, come on,” Emma said. “Only young people are supposed to say mushy things like that.”

  “Well, I mean them,” Edna said, wiping a tear from her eye.

  Sandra was sure she was going to sink right through the floor with embarrassment. Mamm wouldn’t lie about her feelings, but neither did she have to make such a public display, even if she had fallen in love with Amos—if that was even possible so soon.

  Lydia’s daett gave Emma a stern look. “It’s not only young people who enjoy each other’s company, Emma. We’re all thankful for the Lord’s goot gift to Amos and Aunt Edna, and marriage is from the Lord. Don’t you forget.”

  “That it is,” Amos echoed, as the thanksgiving continued around the table.

  “I’m thankful for three daughters still at home,” Aunt Mary declared. “I know I’ll treasure each moment with them until they fly the nest.”

  “And we’re thankful for an understanding mamm and daett,” Emma said, as Rhoda nodded beside her. “This is a bit of a confession, but we had a surprise breakfast for our Englisha friends this morning, to which Mamm and Daett didn’t object.”

  Lydia was hiding her face, but her mamm and daett were smiling.

  Amos spoke again. “A special thanks, then, to parents who understand. The Lord be praised. That is how we will keep the next generation in the faith. I give thanks that I have married into such an understanding family.”

  Lydia’s daett cleared his throat. “Maybe we should explain things. Emma and Rhoda had—”

  Aunt Mary interrupted with a punch to his side. “You don’t have to tell all our family secrets.”

  Laughter went around the table again. Then Amos said, “Well, we all have capers in the house, I suppose.” He then turned to Sandra. “We haven’t heard yet from you, Sandra. What have you to give thanks for?”

  Sandra’s mind whirled. She had to think of something, but what? The table had quieted and everyone turned in her direction, so Sandra rushed the words out. “For Lydia. I’m thankful for our friendship, all the way through our growing up years, and the things we’ve been through together. I’ve been blessed.”

  “Well said.” Amos gave Lydia a quick glance. “And do you want to add something?”

  Lydia didn’t hesitate. “I have always felt the same way about Sandra. She’s like a sister to me. I’m very thankful for her. I will always remember her.”

  “You make it sound as if it’s all in the past,” Amos said, but then he quickly turned to Mark and Clyde.

  Sandra focused on Mark as he began to speak. “I’m thankful for what you have brought to our family, Amos. And for my new friendship with Clyde. The hand of the Lord has definitely been with us these past months, despite our tragedies.”

  Clyde piped up. “I agree. Let that also be my official thanks. And for my acquaintance with Sandra, of course—which I hope will lead to many blessings.”

  Sandra felt herself turning all sorts of colors as laughter filled the table again. Clearly Clyde had no qualms about making his affection known right here at the Thanksgiving table.

  Clyde winked at Sandra, who returned a glare. Amos noticed and laughed. “I’d say these two are off to a goot start already. Young love is a beautiful thing to watch unfold.”

  “You sound awful confident of yourself,” Lydia’s daett said. “Is this a settled matter already? I didn’t know.”

  Amos didn’t respond for a moment, then said, “Let’s say we have high hopes.” And the laughter rippled again.

  Lydia’s daett was grinning from ear to ear. “That is goot to hear, but enough of this talk of love. Shall we give thanks now? Maybe you would lead out, Amos.”

  “Certainly.” Amos looked quite pleased with himself. “Let us bow our heads.”

  Sandra listened as Amos launched into his prayer. He sounded sincere enough. Maybe she had misjudged the man? Would Mamm be so deceived? Not likely. And Mamm wouldn’t fake her affections for Amos. Sandra pressed back the tears as Amos pronounced “Amen.”

  Mamm and Aunt Mary got up at once and began clearing the table. The men pushed their chairs back to stretch their arms into the air.

  “I reckon we have a sleepy afternoon in front of us,” Amos chuckled. “I should go outside and run around the barn to work off all this extra food.”

  “The rocking chair is calling me,” Lydia’s daett said. “Running around the barn will have to wait.”

  The two laughed but didn’t move away from the table.

  Sandra struggled to get her crutches under her, and Clyde hurried over to help. She wanted to shove him away, but gave in.

  “I have to get to the kitchen,” Sandra told him.

  “You’re doing nothing of the sort,” Aunt Mary said. “It’s warm outside and you can go sit on the front porch. The sunshine will help heal your leg.”

  She couldn’t argue with that, so she gave in with a reluctant, “Okay.”

  Clyde stayed right by her side on the way out the front door and helped Sandra settle in her chair before seating himself in the empty chair beside her.

  “Can I stay for a few moments?” he asked. “I’d like to talk with you.”

  What choice did she have? She didn’t like the man, but events had spiraled out of control. Perhaps this is what Mamm had felt the first time Deacon Schrock had brought up the subject of her marriage to Amos. And look where Mamm was now. In love! The shock of that thought ran all the way through Sandra.

  Clyde must have taken her silence for permission as he leaned back in his chair and said, “You need to get some sun on that leg.”

  “If you’d move, I could,” Sandra snapped.

  Clyde didn’t seem offended. He grinned instead and said, “If you stand up with your crutches, I’ll move your chair.”

  Reluctantly, Sandra stood while Clyde moved her chair closer to the rails. Once he was done, she lowered herself back down.

  “There, that’s better,” Clyde said. “Plenty of sunshine for a quick healing.”

  Silence settled between them, and Sandra moved her leg further into the sunlight. Warmth filled her cast.

  Clyde’s voice was gentle. “I’m actually glad you’re not moving into the house with us.”

  “Oh?” Sandra couldn’t hide her surprise.

  Clyde nodded. “It means there’s hope for us. If we take this slowly, you can start to see that the Lord has His hand on our relationship.”

  Sandra tried to breathe. What was she supposed to say? Protests obviously did no good.

  “You should see how my daett and your mamm have fallen in love,” Clyde continued. “It’s embarrassing, in a way—like what your mamm said at the dinner table today. But on the other hand, great hope rises in my heart. The same thing could happen for us, Sandra.”

  “If you say so,” Sandra finally said, with characteristic sarcasm.

  Clyde chuckled, sounding almost like Amos. “You are a challenge, Sandra, but a beautiful challenge. Your spirit stirs my affections deeply.”

  “Please don’t say that!” Sandra shot back.

  His response was to softly lay his hand on Sandra’s arm. To her surprise, she didn’t shake it off.

  “See?” Clyde finally said. “You do like me a little.”

  What is the use? Sandra thought. He still doesn’t get it.

  Chapter Twenty

  That Sunday afternoon after the service, Rosemary parted ways with her sister Ann outside the washroom door and walked toward Bishop Henry’s barn. A few young boys were standing in the yard looking her way, but they paid her no further attention.

  Ezra is out here somewhere, Rosemary told herself. Ezra had gone outside ten minutes ago, but his buggy was still in the barnyard. She hadn’t dared to offer to serve the unmarried men’s table today, even
though she had wanted to. There were limits to her charm, and Ezra should be handled carefully like the valuable prize he was. But she had made progress since the wedding. Ezra was smiling at her much more than he used to—which was surely evidence of some change of attitude on his part.

  So far no one other than Sandra and Lydia had taken her seriously as a contender for Ezra—if they noticed her at all. Her sister Ann hadn’t said anything, and Mamm was too wrapped up with all the care of the younger children to notice what was going on right under her nose.

  Rosemary paused before she entered the barn. A few steps later she found the stall where she had left her horse, Buster, before the morning service. Buster whinnied when Rosemary approached, and several other horses joined in.

  “Your turn will come soon,” Rosemary assured them, as she untied Buster’s strap. “Everyone will be going home before long.”

  There was no sign of Ezra, but perhaps he would appear at the sound of her voice. Rosemary listened for a moment before she led Buster toward the barn door. She had to stop thinking about Ezra, but even if she succeeded for the moment, her resolution would only last until tonight at the hymn singing. She would see his handsome face, and her hopes to win him would start all over again.

  Rosemary heard the sound of men laughing outside as they approached the barn. Yah, that was Ezra’s voice mixed in with several other men’s. Rosemary stepped aside from the barn door as the men made their way inside. Buster whinnied again, and they all turned to look at her.

  “Rosemary!” Ezra exclaimed. “Let me help you hitch Buster to the buggy.”

  “You know my horse’s name?” Rosemary didn’t hide her astonishment.

  “We know everything about girls,” one of the other boys said.

  They all laughed, and Ezra motioned them on with a wave. “Get going. I’m taking care of this one.”

  Rosemary found her voice again. “But Ann is out there waiting. She’ll help me.”

  “I’m helping you.” Ezra took the tie rope from Rosemary’s hand.

  “This is so nice of you,” Rosemary cooed.

  Ezra opened the barn door and motioned for Rosemary to go out first. “I’ve wanted a chance to speak to you in private,” Ezra said, following her outside to the buggy.