Cassie's Choice

by Donna Gallagher

  “For heaven’s sake, Mitch. You, a SNAG? Please! Would you just tell us and stop with the stupid grinning.”

  The frustration with her husband so clear in Pippa’s voice would have caused Cassie to laugh if she hadn’t been just as intrigued about Rook’s opinion. But nothing could have prepared her for what he said next.

  “Riley is in love with you, Cassie. He’s been crazy about you from the first time he set eyes on you. I find it hard to believe you didn’t know. Didn’t you guys ever talk about your feelings for one another? I thought you had given him the flick, Cass, thought maybe he had scared you off. That you didn’t feel the same way. But I guess if you’re still so upset about it two years later, then there is a whole heap more going on here.”

  Chapter Seven

  It was just ridiculous that a man could be so messed up over a woman. The more Riley thought about Cassie—the way she looked, how much he missed her—the more frustrated he became. Adding to this misery and causing him some confusion was the notion that Cassie was still upset over what had happened. Yes, she might still be angry with him over the way he’d left it unfinished between them. Riley was starting to believe he may have acted in haste, shown his immaturity by doing a runner, but it was more than that. She had really seemed to be upset.

  He had spent much of the night mulling over the possibilities and here it was the next morning and he was driving to work with Cassie still the main focus of his thoughts. He was so preoccupied that he nearly ran into another car, and just to make that even worse the other car belonged to Brodie.

  Fuck! Nice one, idiot, way to go. Running over your boss, nice start to the day. “Sorry ’bout that, Brodes, didn’t see you,” Riley apologised as he climbed out of his car.

  “Well, I hope you didn’t see me. Hate to think you tried to run into my car on purpose,” Brodie replied, but there was no smile to go with the words. “What’s up? I’ve known you long enough to be able to tell when something is eating at you. Is it the job? Do you need help? Don’t feel like you have to prove anything to me, Riley. If you need help just say so… No one will think any less of you. This is a crazy time of the year for everyone.”

  Think less of him… That was it in a nutshell. The one person Riley wanted to talk to over his obsessive feelings for Cassie was the one person in the world Riley never wanted to disappoint. Talk about a rock and a hard place.

  “Job’s fine, Brodie, busy and yes crazy at times, but nothing I can’t handle.”

  “Well, son, something’s upsetting you. You know I’m here if you need to talk. I’ve been around the block a time or two and can probably give you another outlook on whatever it is that’s been bothering you. And, Riles, I think you’ve been off your game for a while now. You know I think of you as a brother, even a son, but I won’t push it. Just know that when you’re ready I’m here.”

  Brodie walked away, leaving Riley standing motionless beside his car—the car given to him by the very man that had just made the remark about him being like a son, who had called him son.

  Riley even tried to imagine how the conversation might go…

  “Well, two years ago Cassie, Mike and I were having a threesome—you know, Brodie, both of us boys taking turns fucking Cassie, like she was some kind of sexual plaything for us to use. Problem was that when it was Mike’s go, I lost it. You see, when I saw Cassie and Mike together I wanted to kill him for daring to touch my woman. I wanted to, at the very least, beat him senseless then take Cassie and lock her away from the world so that no other man could touch her—look at her. Bit like that bloke that beat up Mandy, I couldn’t see myself without Cassie in my life, no matter what it took to make that happen. So instead of becoming a raving lunatic stalker, I ran away. Never spoke to her again. The punchline is that I’m still that lunatic, two years later. All I can think of is Cassie. She fills my thoughts awake and asleep. Yeah, I’d make great son material for you, Brodie. You, a man who is so principled, honourable. I’m just the sort of kid you’d want.”

  No, that was never going to happen. He just needed to man up and get over this infatuation with a woman who didn’t feel the same way he did. Even if she almost acted like she did.

  * * * *

  The rest of the day had flown past. Riley was glad to have been kept busy organising all the Jets players’ media appearances and organising the events planned for the weekend’s final. He’d expected a visit from Rook. Every time Riley had heard a voice outside the office doorway he’d waited for Rook to appear, but it had never happened.

  As he drove home to face another night alone in the apartment he’d once shared with his sister, he tried to decide if he was relieved over Rook’s no-show or hurt that his friend had obviously turned his back on him.

  It’s probably for the best anyway, he decided as he let himself into his claustrophobically silent home and collapsed on the sofa. If I don’t socialise with Rook or Pippa it’s less likely I will run into Cassie. He told himself this, but it didn’t make him feel any better. What I need to do is to go out and meet someone else. Maybe I’ll go to Jetstream after the weekend game. Even as he was making the plan, Riley knew he was kidding himself. He might go to the nightclub but searching out another woman—it wasn’t going to happen. He was so lost in his own thoughts that when he heard the knock at the door he had no idea how long his unexpected visitor had spent trying to garner his attention.

  “Yeah, I’m coming, hold on,” he shouted as he took the few strides from sofa to doorway. There was no way he could hide the look of shock on his face as he laid eyes on the very last person he would have expected to be standing on his doorstep. Cassie.

  “Umm, I hope I haven’t called in at a bad time, Riley. It’s just I think we need to talk.”

  Surprised. Shell-shocked. Aroused. Riley stood looking at Cassie. Her words had sounded hesitant—she was nervous. He could tell by the way she chewed at her bottom lip while she waited for his response. A response he knew he should give…but the words were just stuck in his throat. Refusing to come forth. He couldn’t believe she was standing at his door. So close, he wanted to drag her inside and crush his lips to her mouth, she looked so fucking hot. His mind raced as he tried in vain to come up with a good reason to turn her away. But he wanted her to stay. Go. Stay.

  “I’m sorry. Maybe I shouldn’t have come without calling first…” Cassie started to turn, ready to leave.

  It was now or never. He had to make a choice. This was a chance to make things right with Cassie so that he could face his friends again. But Riley was worried that he would not be strong enough to let her leave. Once she entered his apartment would he have the fortitude to keep his hands from her? Keep from kissing those tempting lips? Running his fingers through her blonde curls or feeling the weight of her breasts in the palms of his hands again?

  “No… Don’t go, Cass.” The words came, a plea, as he reached out to stop her. The moment his hand touched her arm, Riley knew he was in trouble. That small connection to her opened up a dam of emotions. The familiar tingle raced up his arm. Just barely a touch and his body was on fire. Needy. Wanting. The power of her over him was indescribable. He wanted to fall to his knees, beg her forgiveness. He would have given anything at that moment for her to touch him. But he could not be weak. He had to pull himself together. If Cassie wanted to talk then talk they would.

  “You wanted to talk, let’s talk. Do you want to come in? I can make you a cuppa, I have tea. Actually, I’ve got some of your favourite—it’s still chamomile, right?”

  “If you’re sure it’s no trouble, and yes it is.” The smile nearly did him in. When Cassie smiled, her face lit up a room, her eyes sparkled and a dimple appeared in her left cheek. It was adorable and sexy as all get out. He had teased her over it many times but it always turned him inside out. Tonight was no different. God he was in trouble.

  Riley stepped back and as Cassie entered past him he caught a whiff of her perfume—no, not perfume, Cassie didn’t wear any, it
was all her. Enticing and fresh. Reminding him of what he had lost, what he missed.

  “I’ll just pop the kettle on then,” he muttered as he tried to not obsess over the fact that the woman he wanted so badly was now standing in his living room.

  “Is this where you grew up? The place you shared with Caitlin?”

  Riley stopped in his tracks and watched as Cassie roamed the small space that he called home. She touched the back of his sofa with her hand, and he imagined her stroking his shaft the same way. He refocused and returned to his original plan of making tea as he answered her.

  “Only for a few years. We moved in with Brodie after that. It doesn’t look the same as it did back then. This furniture is new and the paintings and photos are courtesy of Caitlin. I didn’t really have much input.” For the life of him Riley didn’t know why he was spilling so much information. There was no reason for Cassie to be interested in who had decorated the place. Riley’s mouth just seemed to take on a life of its own. Pretty much just like the rest of him. His brain was saying slow down, but his mouth and dick had different ideas.

  Turning his attention to filling the kettle with water and finding the tea bags, Riley tried to pull himself together.

  “I like it, it’s cosy. Caitlin did a good job because the place suits you, Riley.” She spoke from directly behind him. She had entered the tiny space of the kitchen. Riley would only have to turn around and she would be within reach. The temptation of knowing that was torture. Riley, ignoring the belief that a watched pot never boils, stared at the kettle waiting for the steam to rise—tried to ignore the voice that was killing him.

  He certainly could not take the chance of looking at her yet. He tried for some small talk, amazed at the length of time it took for the so-called rapid-boil kettle to heat up. “So how have you been?” It was the most ridiculous question he could have ever asked. As soon as the words had left his lips he wanted to haul them back in.

  “Now that’s an interesting question… Confused, angry, sad and lonely just about sums it up. What about you, Riley? How have you been?”

  Chapter Eight

  Cassie started to think her spur of the moment idea was turning out to be a massive mistake. She could hardly believe she was standing in Riley’s kitchen, staring at his back. His broad shoulders were within the reach of her fingers. She only needed to take one step forward and she would have been able to wrap her arms around his waist, lean her body into his muscular back. The T-shirt he wore stretched deliciously, enticingly over that wide expanse, reminding her of times past, when snuggling into the warmth of Riley’s body was as natural as breathing.

  But that was then and after the offhanded comment he’d made and her incredibly stupid response, Cassie doubted she would ever get the chance to lay her hands on him again. Why she’d admitted to being lonely was beyond her. Desperate Cassie needed to be reeled back in and locked away if they were ever going to have a chance at being friends. And that was why she had made the decision to come here in the first place. She had been feeling so guilty that Pippa and Rook had been avoiding Riley. It was not fair to him for her mistakes to come between them. Cassie had hoped that if she could get Riley to talk to her maybe they could move on and everything would settle back down.

  Well, that was the excuse she had made up for herself—but now standing so close to the man who had haunted her dreams for the past few years, Cassie was having a hard time remembering those reasons. She wanted to hold him. More to the point, she wanted to feel his arms around her body. And more than that, she wanted to feel his cock buried deep in her aroused and eager pussy. The man had done nothing but offer to make her a cup of tea and she was ready to fuck him senseless—yes, Desperate Cassie needed to be put back in her cage, and quickly.

  “Fuck it!”

  Cassie was still trying to figure out what Riley had meant when he spun around to face her. “I’m sorry for what I’m about to do…but I just can’t seem to stop myself.”

  When Riley placed his hands on either side of her head and dragged her face towards his, Cassie was in shock, but as their lips met, her body rejoiced. Ignoring the sounds of warning bells and the thoughts—This is a very bad idea, Cassie—that were running through her mind, she fell into the kiss. The warmth from his touch, the slight pain from the way his tight grip on her hair added to the fire that began to smoulder from within her. She was kissing Riley Walters.

  As Riley plundered her mouth with his tongue, he realigned his body to crowd hers. The hardness of his chest abraded her beaded nipples and she rubbed against him like a cat in heat. She wound her arms around his waist, shoving her hands under his shirt. Skin. She felt his skin beneath her hands and it was everything she remembered. The heat emanating from his body, and the sense of strength he exhibited in his toned, well-defined physique, so good. Cassie ran her fingers up his spine, every bump of his vertebrae familiar, perfect. It was such an assault on her senses that her ears were ringing—the high-pitched whistling in unison with her soaring emotions.

  Then the heat was gone. Riley stepped away. Let go of her.

  “The kettle… I have to turn it off,” he said as he turned his back on her again. Her head was spinning. What is going on? Finally it sank in.

  The whistling? Kettle—it was the water boiling… Cassie sighed, making a long, loud noise. Talk about bad timing. How she wished she could stop her blood from boiling as easily as flicking a switch on a kettle. What was worrying her even more was that Riley did not appear in any hurry to resume where they had left off. She didn’t know what to do. What to say.

  “Riley…”

  “Cassie, I’m sorry, I shouldn’t have done that.”

  Riley’s words drove through her like a knife. The perfect switch to cool her raging libido. She turned from inferno to ice in one short sentence.

  He was sorry for kissing her. Rage replaced sexual hunger. He was not getting away with it again.

  “Oh. No. You. Don’t. Riley Walters. You do not get to kiss me like that and then apologise, like it meant nothing. I felt your hunger—you wanted me as much as I wanted you. Don’t you dare pretend you didn’t.” Cassie surprised herself with her fierce outburst but was relieved that it did result in Riley turning to face her again.

  “I did want you… Do want you… I’m apologising for not asking you first, before I assaulted you.” Riley’s voice was filled with anguish and his body trembled as he stood before her, his fists clenched by his side. But it was his choice of words that worried her even more—‘assault’? Why on earth would he use that term?

  “You didn’t do anything I wasn’t wanting, Riley. I’ve dreamt of kissing you, touching you again, many times. Did you feel me pull away? Try to push you? No, you didn’t. I wanted you to take it further. If not for that damn whistling, I would have done more to encourage you along. So what happens now? Are you going to run again? And just in case you’ve forgotten, we’re at your place so that could be difficult,” Cassie added for good measure. She stood her ground and glared at Riley.

  And waited.

  Inside she was a mess. Two warring factions were battling it out in her mind. One side terrified that he would ask her to leave, but equally as distraught over where this conversation would lead if he asked her to stay. The other trying to remind her of the pain she had felt when Riley had let her go. But this war was of little consequence because Cassie knew she would stay, would do anything Riley asked of her, just for a chance to be with him again. The two years of feeling that she’d given too much of herself to Riley, belittled herself and torn her self-respect to shreds, made no difference. She would do it all again in a heartbeat. After all this time, Riley Walters still owned her heart and body.

  “We’re not good together, Cassie. What we had back then was different for me. I wanted more than you could give me. I have no right to ask that of you. Being with you or anywhere near you makes me feel things I have no right to feel.”

  Cassie had a hard time trying to understan
d what Riley was saying to her, but the words hurt. So she wasn’t enough for him, didn’t do it for him. How could he say they weren’t good together, when she remembered their time together so differently? Although she had always worried her inexperience would not be enough for him, Riley had known all the right moves. Had never left her unsated, always touched her in just the right way to make her body soar until the building orgasm claimed her. It was that fear that had led to her agreeing to the ménage in the first place. Obviously she had not been exciting enough sexually for Riley. That didn’t help what she was feeling now, though. Desperation to have him in her life again overtook all sane or rational thought.

  I could try to give you what you need, Riley. Maybe if you told me what it was that I didn’t do right last time I could try harder. Cassie felt sick that she wanted to speak the words she was thinking. In effect doing exactly what she preached to her students was wrong—that having sex with someone would not ensure true love or a long-term relationship. And yet here she was, fighting to keep those words from passing her lips and offering to do whatever Riley asked of her without any thought of her own limits.

  Cassie was not even certain she could go through with her silent plea—she’d spent so long getting over that dirty feeling the ménage had left her with that her rational self, fighting to remain in control, was trying to warn her to be careful. What if Riley asked her to sleep with someone else again? How could she possibly handle that? What if it involved another woman? Could she share Riley, watch as he was pleasured by lips that weren’t her own?

  Was being with him that important to her?

  She was so confused. This was not the way she had thought the night would go.

  The conflict going on in Riley’s head was extensive. He could not quite believe it was happening. Of course he had felt Cassie accept his kiss and yes, she’d not pushed him away. He could still feel the heat from her touch on his back, burning him and reminding him of how good it was to be with her. But that was the problem. He knew that if tonight went any further, if he let down his resolve to never be with Cassie again—and it was hard to remain strong—the result would be disastrous. There was no way that Riley could have a taste of what he ached for and remain detached. His obsession would be rekindled—or even become a raging inferno.