Marianne walked around Darius’ office suite upstairs waiting for him to get off the telephone. The glass wall allowed him breathtaking views and a sense of being invincible, and she could see how that could be useful to him especially when he was faced with impossible circumstances.
Finally he hung up the phone and walked over to her! “Okay mum, I ordered some lunch and it is on its way up!’
“Darius, are you living from inside this suite still? What’s wrong with eating in the restaurant?” she asked getting straight to the point!
“Mum, you are sharper than a knife sometimes. What gave me away? “he asked.
“Well nothing in your demeanour, it’s just that whenever we drive past your home the windows are closed, and the house is dark! Are you taking time for yourself like we talked about?”
“No, actually I have been immersed in my work here and I just found it convenient again to just stay here at the hotel,” he replied not mentioning that trying to live at home without Candasee was excruciating to say the least.
“Hmm, so I see that Candasee is here and by the looks of it you two still have a lot to work out between you!” she said sitting down on the black leather sofa that faced the glass wall. “Honey could you lower the partial shade, the sun is really warming up the room, don’t you think?”
Darius obliged her and the room took on a subtle tint reducing the full glare of the sunlight which was streaming in.
“Mom, you are right, I have so much I need to say to Candasee and I am hoping I can do it justice. I asked her to come to me this evening but she never said if she would. I am just hoping that she will be able to make it.”
“So what are you going to do? You two need some time alone to see if you can work out what went wrong between you!”
“I know, and I am working on it but there is a small problem!”
“What kind of problem?” she asked.
“Candasee is here with her boyfriend slash boss Nathan Carthswright who just happens to hate me already! I can’t really blame him though.”
At that revelation Marianne’s eyes widened with surprise. Candasee was involved with someone else?
“I know, that it should not surprise me that some other lucky devil has realized how great she is,” Darius continued. “But I still can’t accept that it’s what she wants especially after I kissed her this morning. I think she knows now that things aren’t over between us!”
“Oh this is good news! You kissed?” asked Marianne prodding to know more with her face now shining with happiness. She was such a romantic, but even more so now that it was related to her son.
“Don’t get too excited yet Mum! Yes, I ran into her on the beach this morning and well one thing led to another. I am hoping I didn’t scare her off by being too intense. I was thinking about asking her to dinner tonight but that will be impossible now with the auditions and screenings which they need to do for the travel show! My best bet is that she will come this earlier this evening, I’m just not sure she will.”
“And why wouldn’t she, that girl is in love with you and has been since the day you guys first met in Barbados,” replied Marianne.
“How can you be so sure of that Mum?” he asked sitting beside her.
“You are forgetting that I know how you both were around each other? Your misunderstanding got out of hand and it caused you to separate for a time, but I have always prayed and known that you would be reunited. When I asked her about leaving in the next six days in the lobby, she looked alarmed at the thought of going back home and so did you. She is your twin flame Darius, and this misunderstanding between you has finally run its course. Time has simply acknowledged that and brought you back to each other. It is simply time for you two to get your marriage back on track,” she said.
“Mum you make it sound so simple”.
“It is simple! It’s only you two who are making this complicated. Candasee is a smart girl and she won’t be able hide the truth from herself for too long before her conscience kicks in. I am sure she will see that she needs to give you another chance!”
“But, I really hurt her a lot when we were married by the things I said and did. Actually I was unforgivable! Nathan probably offers her all of what I could never give her then and probably some of the things I still can’t now,” said Darius standing and walking toward the glass wall.
“You never did tell me exactly why the two of you broke up son! Even Candasee refused to talk to me about it! What could be so bad that she can’t forgive you?”
“Mom, I am ashamed to say it but, I began treating Candasee pretty badly when she told me she wanted to change her career.”
“But why? She has always been so talented!” said Marianne.
“Do you remember the day Dad left us in Scotland?”
“Yes, how could I forget that awful day?” she replied twisting her lips in disdain.
“Well the woman Dad was with that day was the lead dancer and choreographer from the performing arts troupe he managed and it was not the first time I saw them together. I walked in on both of them having sex in his office one evening after school and she did not even bother to get up when she saw me. They made it seem as though I was the one who was the one that did not belong.”
“Oh son, you never told me this!” exclaimed his mother.
“Yes I know but I couldn’t tell you that. You were already so sad all the time. I couldn’t say that I already knew who was behind wrecking our family. It was bad enough seeing how dad’s side of the family treated us and how his awful drinking made him behave. I’ve always resented both her and Dad for the disrespect they showed you and I held that in my heart for years Mum. So when Candasee said that she wanted to be a dancer, I flipped out, I couldn’t handle it. It was as though I was ten again and was risking having my life ruined by becoming my irresponsible father. I felt that I was betraying you and I know it’s crazy but that is it and I pushed Candasee until she could not take it anymore.”
“Darius, I’m so sorry!” she said standing and touching her son’s cheek gently.
“I did not realize why I was doing it then, but after some soul searching following the divorce I discovered what had been eating at me all those years. I came to realize that I needed to finally let go of all that, because keeping it in my heart was only destroying me and the life I wanted with Candasee. I just want to be able to tell her that none of that is a problem anymore but every time I try to find the words, I don’t get the opportunity to explain myself and I am afraid she may find my reasons to be too shallow!”
“Just tell her like you told me!” insisted Marianne.
“You don’t understand, by telling you I lose nothing. You will still be here with me supporting me tomorrow and the next day. But by telling Candasee, I could lose her to another man, if that hasn’t happened already.”
“Nonsense, Candasee will eventually see that she wants to reunite once she understands. She loves you; a mother can see these things,”
“She has a lover, who is also here at the hotel and he knows what my intentions are,” he said. He is not going to just stand aside and let me mess with his relationship. If it were me in his shoes I would be so angry right now!”
“Hmm son, so the plot thickens! You are gearing up for the biggest takeover of your life and you are not sure if it will work?”
“Correct! I don’t know what I will do if she marries him. I know I will have to accept it and be happy for her but until I see that happen, I can’t accept any other future for us than being together again!”
“Well, don’t! Stay focused on what you want and what you believe to be in both yours and Candasee’s highest good. You know what you need to do.”
“Have a little faith!” they both said simultaneously as Marianne embraced her son.
Chapter 8
Solange was frustrated! Of all the days when she needed to get out of the office early, she was now being bombarded with more details to sort out! This was going to be a long
evening!
Rifling through the filing cabinet for the hard copy of last year’s repairs estimates, she now had to assemble a report to present to the hotel board to grant the release of funding for the untimely renovations by tomorrow morning.
As she looked at her watch the time was already three fifty six and Nathan was expecting her to arrive at the hotel by four o’clock. All during the day she found herself reconsidering his hare-brained scheme and feeling more and more uncomfortable with it! The truth was that she knew she would be lying to Candasee if she tried to make her think that anything more than friendship existed between herself and Darius! In fact, she was the one pushing him and he never responded to her advances in the way she wanted. It was time to wake up and realize that she couldn’t win in this. Not even the universe was cooperating with this deception.
Solange walked back to her desk and just as she reached for her phone to dial Nathan’s number it rang!
“Hello Solange Hassell here!” she answered briskly.
“Solange it’s me, Nathan! I am just confirming that you are on your way now?”
“Nathan, I’m not going to be able to make it! I was just about to call you! I have an important report to complete before I leave here for the evening that the hotel board must review first thing tomorrow morning! I am sorry!”
Nathan exhaled forcefully with frustration and swore audibly.
“Look Nathan, don’t you think that if you have to fight so hard to win Candasee’s love and to use these underhanded tactics that your relationship may not be as solid as you think?”
“Solange, I know that it isn’t! It hasn’t been given the chance to be! As soon as Candasee landed here at this hotel Darius’ world immediately began to draw her in again like a damned vortex! This trip was supposed to be a time where we could have an adventure together and to really deepen what we have between us without outside interference!”
“I know this isn’t helping you but maybe none of this was to be between you two! Look at how it is all unfolding, almost out of your control, from the storm to my unknowing choice of hotel and even now to all this work that has been dumped on me at the last minute! I’m sorry I know you love Candasee and I really wish you the best in winning her. You really deserve some happiness!”
Nathan sensed an immense tension begin to build behind his forehead as he listened to Solange’s apologetic speech. This could not be happening! On one hand he was being given the opportunity of a lifetime but somehow it meant little to him without having Candasee to share it with! It wasn’t that he was obsessed with her; he just wanted her in his life forever. This wasn’t a game to him.
“Solange, I am going to take a walk on the beach to clear my mind before tonight’s auditions! Look, I am not mad at you, just disappointed at how things are turning out! I wish you well with your report!”
“Thanks Nathan and look, take care of yourself okay!”
“Yeah, I’m trying to!” was all he could muster as he disconnected the call. Solange was right, the more he focused on keeping Candasee and Darius separate the more the situation seemed to favour their getting close to each other again and the more his head hurt with the tension of trying.
He would just have to be himself and let Candasee decide who was right for her. Even that thought deepened the throbbing in his temples. Sinking down on a deck chair near the pool area he rubbed them willing for some kind of release. Instead of trying to separate them he should be showing her why she and he were right for each other. The final class for the evening was split between vocal training and tap, and Candasee had returned to their room to rest before the evening auditions. The delegate’s were now dismissed and many of them took to the pool area and to the beach to swim and to relax for a moment before the auditions later.
Everyone seemed to be smiling and having a good time except him and it was his fault. From this moment he decided that he needed a serious change in attitude. He quickly walked back into the lobby and rode the elevators to the seventh floor and as he got to the door and swiped the passkey, he saw a lady clad in a pink pants suit emerge from the second elevator. He was about to close the door when she stopped in front of his room looking at the room number as though she found what she was looking for.
Nathan pulled open the door again and asked, “Can I help you?”
“Hi yes, I’m looking for Candasee!” she said.
“Uh, I can go in and see if she is awake, and come back and let you know!” replied Nathan not knowing who the lady was and decided to check with Candasee before allowing her inside.
Marianne observed the gentleman entering Candasee’s room and realized that she was standing with Nathan her daughter-in-law’s boyfriend. He was a handsome man, she thought with a smile to herself, Candasee really had her hands full and Darius would have a challenge too, she mused silently.
“Wait, listen that is not a problem, if she is asleep I don’t want to disturb her. I will come back another time! Just tell her Marianne stopped by! She knows who I am and give her this card so that she can call me!”
Nathan took the card and watched as the stylish woman returned to the elevators.
He looked at the card and read the name, ‘Marianne Brogan’.
Well if this didn’t keep getting better and better, said Nathan reminding himself of his commitment not ten minutes ago to fight fair! Closing the door behind him he stepped inside the cool interior of the room and walked to the bedroom where Candasee was indeed lying on the bed fast asleep. She had a gruelling morning conducting the dance sessions and she really gave it her all. No wonder she was tired!
Sitting on the edge of the bed near her feet he put the card on the comforter beside him and picked up her feet and placed them on his lap and began to rub them gently, kneading the muscles at the bottom of her feet and her toes. Her chest rose and fell gently as she slept and she looked so peaceful that he did not want to disturb her so he put her feet back on the bed and moved over to the balcony area to open the door and stepped outside. Just being alone in this room with her was enough to stir him with intense arousal and he needed to clear his head. Maybe he should have taken that walk after all.
“Nathan?” said Candasee groggily.
Nathan turned to see Candasee stretching luxuriantly as she woke up. He leaned his body onto the doorframe as he watched seeming perfection unfold before his eyes! This was a view he did not want any other man to have but him! She was wearing a white midriff length top and a pair of loose mid-calf knit pants in a flattering shade of aquamarine.
“Yes love, I just came upstairs, I hope I didn’t wake you!” he replied.
“What time is it? Is it time for the auditions?” she asked still a little disoriented.
“No we still have two hours before those begin!” he replied while his mind thought of exactly what he wished they could do to pass the time!
“Oh good! I wanted to talk to you about something!” she said sitting up and swinging her legs to the floor.
“What is it?”
“I know we decided that we should stay together yesterday but I am having second thoughts about that again. I’m just going to come straight to the point here and I don’t want you to take this badly but think you should go back to your room in 510.”
Okay so those weren’t the exact words he hoped to hear but somehow he wasn’t surprised either considering how slightly aloof she was all day.
“May I ask you why you’ve changed your mind after only one day of us sharing this room? I thought we had a wonderful time so far,” he countered.
“We have but I think that by us moving into this room together we are going to end up ruining our friendship,” she said.
“Candee we are much more than just friends and since when does intimacy ruin a relationship? No, I want to know the truth. Why are you pushing me away again?”queried Nathan getting upset again as the throbbing in his head intensified. This was exactly why he needed Solange.
“We are more than friends
Nathan, but I would prefer the opportunity to date you without feeling as though I am already married to you!” she said finally.
“Is the thought of being married to me so repulsive?” asked Nathan narrowing his eyes and folding his arms across his chest as her words pierced him like arrows.
Candasee could see that this conversation was not going as she’d hoped. All she wanted was the space to think clearly and to relax without having to worry about being pursued all the time.
“No the thought of marrying you is not repulsive at all Nathan, but don’t you think it is too early to be considering anything like that between us anyway? Can’t you just go along with me on this please? We can still meet for dinner and walks like we’ve planned.
At those words Nathan recalled the two times in a row that he did not see Candasee for their scheduled jog all because of a certain man. And no, he did not think it was too early to be considering marriage. The more she spoke the more he was beginning to wonder if he was pushing her too hard, or was it Darius who was making demands of her.
“Candee, is this about Darius? Has he been pressuring you to break up with me?”
“No Nathan, this is me. If you remember before we arrived here I always wanted my own room and I think I only agreed yesterday when you made it an ultimatum of sorts.”
Nathan moved from where he was standing by the door over to Candasee and pulled her up to her feet and tilted her face up to his by placing his finger under her chin.
“Candasee do you know how much I love you?” asked Nathan.
“I think I am finding out now!” said Candasee honestly regarding the deep intensity that filled Nathan’s entire expression.
“What I feel for you is real and I want to be able to say that I trust that you will take care of my heart because it is already yours! I disagree with what you said just now! I think you agreed to allow me to stay here because you know beneath all your reservations and fears that we are great together! I’m not Darius, and I am not going to hurt you! There is no one else that I want to share my life with at this point. All I see, feel and want is you! I am offering you now, not a past pipe dream. You don’t need to feel that you have to run away from me to protect your heart,” he said.
Hidden Love (Derrien Island Trilogy) Page 12