Caught Dead Handed

by Lyndsey Cole

  “Pam.” The exchange between the two women was short but courteous. Hannah knew she was not on Pam’s favorite person list, not that many people were.

  “The coffee’s still hot, Pam,” Jack called from the kitchen.

  “I was hoping you’d have some but I can’t stay for long.” She held up her travel mug. “I’m on my way to the Paradise Inn. One of the entitled guests claims that there was an attempt to kidnap her dog.” Pam rolled her eyes.

  Hannah couldn’t believe her ears. “When did this happen?”

  Pam flicked her wrist. “Oh, a half hour ago.”

  Jack carried his coffee pot out and filled Pam’s mug. “Hannah met someone staying there with a dog in the middle of a custody battle. Maybe that’s the one.”

  Pam’s eyes narrowed. “You know something about this?”

  “Not a kidnapping attempt, but Ruby’s friend is going through a messy divorce and the dog seems to be in the middle.”

  “Figures. These rich folks…”

  Pam didn’t finish her thought but Hannah suspected she wasn’t impressed with the behavior of some of the tourists that spent time in Hooks Harbor. She probably had good reason, but still, without the tourists, Hooks Harbor wouldn’t be a thriving coastal Maine town.

  Hannah scooched herself around Pam in an effort to extricate herself from the situation, only to see Ruby rushing toward Jack’s house with her daughter, Olivia, who clung onto her teddy bear, Theodore, with an iron grip. “Hannah, I’ve just gotten terrible news,” she huffed as soon as she was close enough. “I have to go to the Inn. Juliette’s a complete mess. Can you keep an eye on Olivia?”

  Olivia already had herself squished between the two dogs, whispering a six-year-old’s secret in Nellie’s ear. Hannah loved her niece but it was almost impossible to get any work done while keeping an eye on her. She tilted her head and looked at Jack with what she hoped was her best, can-you-please-please-please-help-me-out, look.

  “Juliette?” Pam asked, her eyes narrowed into a glare. “How do you know her?”

  Ruby ran her fingers through her short hair. “She’s just a friend.”

  “Staying at the Paradise Inn. Where you work.” Pam waited with one hand on her hip. “Are you sure you don’t have anything else to tell me about her?”

  “She called me in tears about a half hour ago. I don’t know what happened.” Ruby’s gaze traveled from Pam to Hannah to Jack. “Did something happen to Juliette?”

  “Someone tried to kidnap Maisy,” Hannah blurted out before Pam could silence her.

  “This is getting more and more interesting. You both seem to know this hysterical woman and the dog,” Pam said. “Fill me in.” She sipped her travel mug.

  Ruby shifted from one foot to the other. “I need to get to work. Hannah, can you tell Officer Larson about Juliette and Maisy?”

  “Sure. And don’t worry about Olivia. Between me, Jack, and Samantha, we’ll have her covered.”

  “Thank you.” Ruby turned toward her house. “Will you still be able to come to the Inn later with Petunia?”

  “I’ll be there.” Hannah shooed Ruby on her way with a wave of her hand.

  “I can’t wait to hear all the details. How about we sit down while I drink my coffee?” Pam walked into Jack’s kitchen without waiting for a response.

  Hannah rolled her eyes at Jack.

  Jack stayed outside with Olivia and the dogs.

  Hannah sat in the same seat she had been in earlier. Her fingernails tapped a staccato rhythm on Jack’s well-worn pine kitchen table. Her day had barely begun but she already felt overwhelmed with having Olivia for the day, jumping into a dog custody situation that looked to be escalating from a mess to a disaster, and finding time for her normal responsibilities at The Fishy Dish and her rental cottages. She shook her head.

  Pam licked raspberry off her finger as if she didn’t have a care in the world. “That was delicious. Where did my dad get this coffee cake?”

  “Um, Meg’s new recipe. But you didn’t hear it from me.” Hannah shifted in her chair. “Listen, Pam, all I know about the dog situation is that Juliette and her soon-to-be-ex-husband, Harold, are fighting over custody of Maisy. The dog. Maisy’s a sweet little Moodle stuck in the middle of a photographer that only wants her to use in his photoshoots and Juliette, who wants the best for the dog she rescued from a shelter.”

  Pam put her hand up. “You lost me at ‘A Moodle’?”

  “Apparently, that’s what you call a Maltese crossed with a Poodle. Anyway, Juliette did express concern that Harold might try to undermine her in order to get custody. Maybe that’s what this attempted kidnapping is all about.”

  “And, just for fun, what’s Petunia got to do with all this?”

  “They want a pig in the background of some of the photos.” Hannah shrugged. “That’s really all I know.”

  “But, you’ll be at the Paradise Inn later with Petunia?”

  “I did agree to bring Petunia and help Juliette keep an eye on Maisy.”

  “Good.” Pam stood. “I’ll be on my way.”

  Good? Hannah wondered what that was supposed to mean. Pam usually wanted Hannah as far away as possible from any crime, dog related or otherwise.

  Hannah waited several minutes, just to be on the safe side that Pam was gone, before she ventured outside.

  “…and Nellie loves me best, then Theodore, then Patches,” Olivia’s small voice explained to Jack.

  “Where do I fit in?” he asked.

  Olivia put her finger over her lips and scrunched her eyes. “I’ll ask Nellie.” She lifted the dog’s ear and whispered, then looked back up at Jack. “Well, Nellie loves Hannah and then you. But she loves me best,” Olivia emphasized again.

  Hannah smiled, happy that Olivia had Nellie to watch over her, too. They were inseparable whenever Olivia visited. Hannah didn’t doubt that Nellie would risk her own life to protect the little girl if necessary.

  Chapter 3

  Meg, Hannah’s cook at The Fishy Dish and right-hand helper for miscellaneous jobs, shot her a killer glare when Hannah finally arrived in the kitchen of the snack bar. “Did Jack let you try my new raspberry coffee cake? I know you always stop at his house in the morning for coffee.” She pointed her wooden spoon at Hannah like it was a weapon.

  Hannah paused just inside the door. Was this a trick question? “Oh, that was your baking?” Hannah looked away from Meg and brushed an imaginary crumb off the counter, hoping her evasive reply wasn’t too obvious.

  Meg, with one hand on her hip and the wooden spoon now waving in front of her, forced Hannah to look at her. “Yes, that was my new secret raspberry coffee cake recipe. And if he gave you a piece, I can bet today’s profits that he told you where it came from. Jack can keep secrets but not from you.”

  “All right, he told me but he made me swear not to let you know. What’s the big deal? It was absolutely delicious.”

  Meg let the edges of her lips curl up slightly. The praise was working.

  “And, Pam had a piece, too. She practically swooned on Jack’s floor,” Hannah added as she pretended to buckle at her knees.

  Meg chuckled. “Yeah, right. Pam and swooning will never go together in the same sentence, but nice try. You’re off the hook, but Jack’s going to hear about this.” She returned her attention back to stirring her clam chowder. “Are you looking forward to a nice quiet weekend?”

  “I was until last night.” Hannah got cabbage, carrots, onions, and mayo out for a big batch of coleslaw. The food processor made quick work of the vegetables and the noise made it impossible for Meg to pry.

  A finger attached to Meg’s arm reached over and hit the off button. “I think your cabbage is well shredded. What happened last night?”

  Hannah explained about the situation with Juliette, her soon-to-be-ex-husband, Harold, and the ten-pound Moodle named Maisy; plus the photoshoot and the dog-napping attempt.

  “That sounds awful for Ruby’s friend, but why does that
affect your weekend?”

  “Maisy has the most adorable brown eyes, waggy tail, and,” Hannah held out both hands palm-up in front of her, “she gave me a kiss.”

  Meg rolled her own eyes. “Don’t you have enough dogs with Nellie and now with Patches becoming a permanent resident here?”

  “I’m not adopting Maisy. It’s nothing like that.” Hannah dumped the cabbage and carrots into a big bowl, added a generous scoop of mayo, and started to stir the coleslaw. “Juliette wants another pair of eyes on Maisy while she’s with Harold for the photoshoot. And, in light of this dog-napping attempt, I can see why.”

  “Won’t that look a bit weird to her almost-ex? Having a random person show up? I wouldn’t want any strangers hanging around if I was one of the models prancing around in a tiny bit of fabric.”

  “I’m bringing Petunia as a background prop so that will be my cover.”

  Meg laughed. “You’ll have to give her a bath first. I saw that area you made for her behind Ruby’s house and she loves to enjoy a good roll in the muddy corner.”

  “Good point. I never even thought of that. I also need to find her sunglasses and sunhat. Once she’s all dressed up, I suspect she’ll steal the show and be the star of the photoshoot.” Hannah slid the bowl of coleslaw into the refrigerator just as Samantha Featherstone pranced into the kitchen.

  “Am I late? What did I miss? My super sleuthing senses have picked up a vibe of something out of the ordinary happening today.” Samantha, all five feet two inches of her petite eightyish year old body stood at attention eyeing Meg and Hannah with ice blue twinkling eyes that perfectly matched her rayon blouse.

  “Just so long as nothing goes wrong, I guess it could be interesting.” Meg ignored Samantha’s enthusiasm and turned the burner under the chowder to low. She began the big daily task of hand cutting both white and sweet potatoes for fries.

  Samantha’s nose was in the air. “I knew something was up the minute I smelled the clam chowder. What’s going to go wrong?”

  Meg frowned at her. “That doesn’t even make any sense. You took a wild guess but I’ll let Hannah explain the latest drama that dropped in her lap.”

  Samantha clapped her hands. “Terrific. I’m ready for some good old fashioned drama around here. We haven’t had anything fun happen for weeks. Does it have anything to do with the swimsuit shoot?”

  Hannah stared at Samantha. “How do you know about that?”

  “Well, I saw a flyer last week that put out a call for models.” Her eyes moved from Hannah to Meg. “I’m going to the walk-in audition later.” She fluffed up her short silver curls and twisted her shoulders back and forth in an attempt to look like she could walk a runway with grace.

  Meg covered her mouth when a fit of laughter threatened to send her from the kitchen.

  Hannah forced her own mouth to behave.

  “What?” Samantha’s eyebrows rose. “You two don’t think I’ve still got it?”

  “You and Petunia might be the hit of the day,” Meg managed to spurt out between her laughing.

  “Petunia? What a great idea. How about I help you give her a makeover and I’ll arrive with that adorable potbelly pig. It will be sure to get me noticed.” Samantha helped herself to the coffee that Meg always made first thing when she arrived, which had to be lukewarm, at best, by now.

  Hannah washed and dried her hands and wondered if it was the right kind of attention that Samantha would get. “I like your idea. Once we get through the lunch rush, we’ll get Petunia all cleaned up and I’ll tell you about the rest of the drama at the swimsuit event. But now, I hear some customers out front so I’ll see to that.”

  Hannah walked to the front of The Fishy Dish where a man and a young blonde woman were looking over the menu on the blackboard over the counter.

  “Oh, Harold.” The young woman swatted his hand. “Don’t let anyone catch you doing that when we’re doing the photoshoot. I don’t want people to think I’m sleeping with you just to get this modeling job.” She giggled and leaned against the man.

  Well, this morning was only getting more and more interesting, Hannah told herself. She had a strong suspicion that this mustached Harold must be Juliette’s almost-ex-husband—Harold Chandler III—and the blonde had to be Monique.

  “Can I help you?” Hannah asked in her friendliest voice.

  “This is just the cutest little snack bar I’ve ever seen,” gushed the blonde. “I’ll have, ah, let me think.” She studied the menu for a bit longer as she chewed on her fingernail. “A haddock sandwich, baked, no mayo, and no bread.” She giggled again. “I guess that’s not a sandwich is it, Harold?”

  “No, Monique. I think you just ordered plain baked haddock. I’ll have the fried fish platter.” He studied Hannah’s face, making her a bit uneasy from the extreme attention. “We’ll be sitting outside over there.” He pointed to one of the picnic tables under a red umbrella. A big camera and a bag covered half the table, which helped to confirm Hannah’s suspicion about his identity.

  “I’ll bring it out when it’s ready. There are drinks in the cooler.” Hannah pointed to the side of the snack bar where a cooler held a large assortment of cold drinks.

  Monique strutted to the cooler. She talked to herself debating the choices but finally grabbed a water. “What do you want, Harold?”

  “Anything cold.” He was already half way to the table outside. He picked up his camera and moved closer to the beach and the ocean. “Come over here, Monique. I’ll get a few shots before we eat.”

  After Hannah gave Meg the order, she busied herself outside so she could keep an eye on the couple. Monique threw her flimsy sundress on the table. She paused, facing the ocean, before she ran across the sand in her red bikini with her blonde hair sailing behind her tan shoulders. She kept a safe distance from the waves rushing in and out. Harold moved around, adjusting his camera and even kneeling in the sand for a different angle.

  Hannah was intrigued. Showing up later at the Inn with Samantha and Petunia to watch Harold in action might turn out to be interesting after all. As long as any drama between Harold and Juliette was left outside, she reminded herself.

  “Ouch!” Monique yelled when Harold took her hand in his to pull her back to the table.

  He turned her hand over and examined it. “What happened?” A big white bandage covered the tender area between Monique’s thumb and forefinger.

  She pulled her hand away. “Oh, nothing. I cut myself.”

  Hannah hated to drag herself away from this interaction, but she had to get their food. As soon as she entered the kitchen, both Meg and Samantha practically pounced on her.

  Meg pulled Hannah away from the kitchen door. “What’s going on outside?”

  “Who are those people?” Samantha asked as she peeked through the door. Her eyes were round saucers when she turned back toward Hannah. “She looks like a model. Is that the swimsuit photographer?”

  “That’s my guess.” Hannah picked up the two plates, balanced them expertly, and used her hip to push her way through the door.

  Harold and Monique were settling themselves across from each other at the table when Hannah approached.

  “Ugh. What’s this on the seat?” Monique asked Harold.

  As if on cue, a seagull landed near the table.

  “Probably seagull poop. Sit on a towel.” At least Harold had some common sense.

  Hannah set the two trays in front of them. “Here you go. One award-winning fried fish platter which is our best seller, and one haddock sandwich, baked, no mayo, and no bread.” Hannah smiled at Monique. “I wish I had your will power.”

  Monique flicked her wrist. “It’s not so hard.” Monique stared at Harold’s fried fish platter overflowing with crispy haddock, coleslaw, and a mountain of French fries. “You’re gonna eat all that?” She helped herself to one of the fries.

  Harold used the opportunity to grab Monique’s hand and pull the bandage off, revealing an ugly red wound. “This doesn’t lo
ok like you cut yourself.” He tossed her hand aside.

  Hannah moved back a few steps to clear off a different table. She remained within hearing distance behind Harold but facing Monique.

  Deep red colored Monique’s cheeks. She lowered her eyes away from Harold.

  “It looked like a puncture wound, like you were bitten.”

  “That stupid dog you use in the photoshoots bit me.” Monique taped the bandage over the wound and looked down at her baked fish.

  “Well, there is a solution to that problem, dear.” Harold’s voice held an angry jeer.

  “I was hoping you’d get rid of her.” Monique, obviously, did not pick up on Harold’s tone. She nibbled a small bit of fish off her fork.

  Harold leaned his head across the table, closer to Monique. “That was not what I was suggesting. Maisy is the most important part of my work as far as my customers are concerned. And I intend to keep my customers happy.” He returned to his original position and stabbed a piece of fried haddock. “Models are as plentiful as the sand on this beach.”

  Monique’s mouth dropped open. “Is that why you brought Gwen along, too?”

  Hannah couldn’t see Harold’s face but she didn’t miss how he draped one ankle over the other and calmly began eating. She suspected Monique’s position as one of Harold’s models and as his new girlfriend might not be as strong as she hoped it was.

  But the bigger question was: Why did Maisy bite Monique? Was she the attempted dog-napper? Juliette was bound to insist that Monique be removed from Maisy’s life if that was the case.

  Chapter 4

  By the time the lunch rush was over at The Fishy Dish, Hannah and Samantha headed to Ruby’s house to give Petunia her makeover.

  Samantha beamed from ear to ear with the excitement of the project.

  Hannah forced herself to make the most of what she considered to be, at best, an unpleasant task.

  Petunia grunted and squealed when they came into her view. Her ears twitched forward and she stomped her feet, ready for any adventure.