Try Me

by Parker Blue

  It was too painful to watch them, so I turned my attention to Shade instead. The last time he'd done this, I was the template and hadn't really noticed what was going on with the conduit. Once every second or more, Shade flipped to swirls, and harsh flickers of violet lightning pulsed through him, flashing from Mood to Josh. That must be the otherworldly healing energy he was using, but it looked like a raging storm inside the shadow demon.

  Shade had told Dan and me it didn't hurt him, but the way he grimaced, his teeth bared and his head thrown back, it sure didn't look like a walk in the park. Then again, maybe it wasn't pain. Maybe he was just concentrating really hard.

  I remember the whole process had seemed to take hours, but this only took a few long, agonizing minutes as Josh's wounds, cuts, and scrapes visibly healed. Shade released him abruptly. Josh fell back, passed out, but looked a hundred times better than he had before.

  Mood put her hands over her face and burst into tears.

  "It's okay,” Shade told her tightly. “He's healed now."

  Feeling I needed to do something, I said, “If you want to talk . . . “

  But Mood just shook her head, then ran out the door, slamming it behind her.

  Whoa. “I guess she learned exactly how Josh feels about her."

  Shade stood up and slipped his hood up over his head. “He lost his girlfriend not too long ago. Hasn't gotten over her yet."

  His voice sounded strained. “Are you okay?"

  "Fine.” But when he turned to walk, he staggered a little and caught himself on the couch.

  "Yeah, right."

  I hurried around the couch and tried to help him, but he jerked his arm away. “Don't touch me."

  I backed away, palms out. “Whoa, dude. Just trying to help."

  "I know.” He bent his head and crossed his arms across his chest. “I'm . . . not stable right now."

  What did that mean? I didn't remember this happening last time. Then again, he'd left pretty fast after he'd healed Dan, and I was far more concerned about other things then. “You don't look like you can walk, let alone drive. Why don't you lie down in my room?"

  "Okay."

  He stumbled toward my room and I went before him to clear his path and open the door. Though I was careful not to touch him, I couldn't help but wonder what the heck was going on. Once Shade was horizontal, and lying on his back, I closed the door and stepped toward the bed. “What can I do to help?"

  "Nothing."

  Well, that sounded final, not to mention rude. Now I was confused. After all, we were supposed to go on our first real date tonight, and this didn't seem like the Shade I knew at all. Then again, how much did I really know about the shadow demon? I thought for a minute, wondering what to do.

  I should grant him his secrets.

  I should respect his privacy.

  I should leave him alone.

  To hell with shoulds. I wanted answers.

  [Back to Table of Contents]

  Chapter Nineteen

  I plopped down on the floor next to the bed. “I think I deserve an explanation."

  "Go away, Val,” he said, his voice sounding tight, like he'd gritted the words through his teeth.

  I wished I could see his face, but it whirled with dark energy swirls. Strange. They were moving a lot faster than normal, and seemed shot through with virulent purple. “Not gonna happen. You helped me with Lola. The least I can do is help you with this.” Whatever “this” was.

  From the way my comforter bunched up under his fist, it looked like he was gripping it with all his might. I closed my hand over his fist and he popped back into focus, his face contorted into a snarling mask of demonic rage. I reared back for a moment, finally noticing the long, sharp blade in his other hand, pointed toward his own neck. What the—

  I wrestled the knife away from him and tossed it into the corner, then clamped down on his fist again. I realized the rage wasn't directed at me. In fact, it looked like Shade was battling hard against something internal. Or against something in another dimension, maybe?

  He tried to throw off my hand, but I wouldn't let him. Without letting go, I got up on the bed next to him. “Shade, what's happening? Talk to me.” This was beginning to scare me.

  He whipped his head away from me, trying to hide his raging agony in my pillow. With my other hand, I cupped his cheek, hoping to reassure him.

  "Don't!” He sat up abruptly and shoved me off him, off the bed, and onto the floor. I could hear him breathing hard as he turned away from me and curled into a fetal position.

  Stunned, I sat there for a moment on my aching butt. What the hell was going on? Whatever it was, I was pretty sure Shade wasn't in control of himself right now. Was this the shadow side of his demon? I could sympathize. When Lola took control of me, I wasn't always responsible for my actions either.

  Speaking of Lola, maybe she could help him. Heck, she ought to be good for something. I got up and sat down gently on the bed, trying not to touch him and set him off again. Reaching down deep inside, I encouraged Lola to come out and play. She really liked Shade, so this should be a no-brainer.

  My lusty demon was a little reluctant after we'd been thrown on our butt, but I ignored Shade's body language and reminded myself—and her—that he wasn't usually like this. He was usually nice, friendly, and, when he wasn't all swirly, hot enough to light anyone's fuse.

  Oh, yeah. That did it. Lola reached out tentatively toward Shade. Whatever he was fighting, it didn't matter. He was still male, still helpless against Lola's lure. Thin tendrils of lust and need slipped in through him and slid up his spinal column, caressing his chakras along the way. I sent more wisps of energy to wind through his core, radiating out and down, touching all those sensitive, secret male spots and bringing them to his attention. I left him that way for a few moments, not wanting to do more that would force him to do my bidding.

  "Val,” he croaked in a warning tone.

  "Shhh. Let me help you.” I reached out to massage his shoulders. Boy, were they tense. “Relax. Just enjoy the sensations."

  He let go of a tiny fraction of his tension, but he still wasn't feeling enough desire for Lola. Encouraged, I spooned against his back with my arm around his waist, hoping the touch of my body would finish what Lola had started. Oddly enough, instead of drawing energy from him, I was able to send energy into his body, stoking his pleasure centers with my reserves, stroking his nerve endings with a feather-light touch, helping him to feel human again.

  Whoa. I didn't know I could do that. But it was sure nice to know I could give as well as receive.

  He relaxed some more and unbent from his fetal position. Encouraged, I snuggled closer and let my hand wander up his chest, down his side to his hip and his outer thigh. He sighed in pleasure, and I let my hand move to the inside of his leg, the denim feeling rough against my fingertips. I squeezed his thigh and Shade rolled onto his back. “What are you doing?” he asked softly.

  Ah, good. The strain was gone from his voice. Lola wanted me to let my fingers do a little more walking, but I wasn't bold enough to do that yet. I did want to see his face, though, so I pulled his T-shirt up and laid my palm flat on his warm stomach then gazed into his eyes. Pain resided there, along with shame and another emotion I couldn't name. “I'm trying to make you feel better,” I said.

  He sighed and closed his eyes. “It's working."

  "Good,” I whispered, then straddled his hips to run both of my hands up his bare chest, loving the hardness, the muscles, the ticklish feel of his chest hair. Very male. His lips parted as he watched me beneath hooded eyes, one lock of blond hair curled across his forehead. He was so gorgeous, so beautiful. I couldn't believe he was here. With me. Like this.

  He reached out and clasped my hips, then raised his hands to lift my shirt up and over my head. He did it so fast, he caught me off guard. I froze for a moment, then realized that was all he planned to do for the moment. He clasped my bare waist, smiling as he gazed at me with a covetou
s look in his eye that Lola liked . . . a lot.

  My body heated under his gaze and I fought the urge to cover my chest with my hands. True, I was still covered by a bra, but it was plain white cotton. Not exactly the sort of thing you wanted a guy to see the first time he saw you naked. I'd planned on something lacier and a lot prettier for our date, but hadn't had time to change.

  "Beautiful,” he murmured.

  Embarrassed in the bright light, I slid down onto the bed and laid on my side. Shade sat up, shucked his hoodie, then pulled his T-shirt off over his head. He lay next to me and cradled me in his arms, bare belly to warm bare belly.

  "This feels nice,” he said as he hugged me and rested his forehead against mine.

  Since he didn't seem inclined to do anything else, I wondered if he was still fighting . . . whatever. “Are you okay now?” I asked.

  "I'm good."

  I ran my hand down his smooth back, loving the feel of his chest against mine. I let Lola subside, since he seemed to be in control now. “What happened there, Shade?"

  He stayed silent for a moment, then asked, “You sure you want to know?"

  "Of course. I showed you my demon. Time for you to show me yours."

  He chuckled at that then sighed. “I did."

  "I know, and I want to understand it.” Shade was so sweet, I wanted to help him any way I could. “You're not just a conduit for the other dimension's energies, are you?"

  "Yes and no."

  "Well, that helped. Not. Come on, share."

  "I am a conduit . . . but I don't let all the energies through."

  He stopped there and left me hanging. Sheesh, this was like pulling teeth. “I know you let through the healing energies, so what kind do you not let through? Bad ones?"

  "You could say that."

  "Come on, Shade. Spill."

  He sighed. “Micah is the only other one who knows this. He's usually there for me, after the healing. But I didn't think about calling him when you called. I just came running."

  This reluctance to talk was making me impatient, but I could tell this was difficult for him, and very important. “I won't mention it to another soul."

  "I know.” He squeezed me harder for a moment. “Okay. Shadow demons create a conduit between two dimensions. When I pull in healing energy from the other side, I send back other energy."

  "You mentioned that before,” I said encouragingly.

  He nodded. “When it's going back and forth, it's not a problem. But once I stop . . . “ He paused to take a deep breath. “Other . . . things . . . feel the disturbance and try to cross into this world. Through me. Your energy helped me stop them."

  "Things? Like what?"

  "Bad things. Bad . . . demons."

  "Demons try to cross through you, through your body?"

  He shuddered and nodded.

  I had a sudden vision of Shade's body erupting with pustulant sores that became writhing monsters that grew from his body and fell off. That couldn't be right. “I assume we're talking full demons here. How is that possible?"

  "As a conduit, I could channel their essence. Once it arrives here, they would take the form of one of the native species—humans, dogs, other animals."

  "No wonder they were able to interbreed with us."

  "Yes. Where do you think demons came from in the first place?"

  "I never gave it any thought.” But I did now. Good grief. It made sense. Demons weren't native to this dimension so they had to come from somewhere . . .

  "Thank you,” I said suddenly.

  "For what?"

  "For not letting any more through.” A whole army of full-blooded demons? I shuddered. I didn't want to think about it.

  "You're welcome.” But there was an odd tone in his voice.

  "There's more, isn't there?"

  He sighed. “Yes. Did you ever wonder why you haven't seen more full demons?"

  "Never thought about it.” But now that I had, I was really glad I hadn't. Vampires were bad enough, but at least they'd been human once. Demons, not so much. “Why?"

  "Because the last time they came through was in 1929. All you see now is their great-grandchildren, like us. That's why most of us have one-eighth demon blood. Unless we mate with another partial demon of the same type, the strain diminishes over time."

  "1929? You mean the stock market crash, the depression . . . ?"

  He nodded. “Caused in great part by creatures from another dimension. They see our world as a place to propagate freely in a safe environment. They can't help trying to destroy it at the same time. It's in their nature."

  Stunned, I pulled away to stare at him. “You said the ‘last time’ they came through. I take it they've made it through before?"

  "Yes, and each time with devastating effects on our world. That's why stories of demons go back throughout history."

  "Why haven't we seen more of them? Not that I'm complaining, mind you."

  "Because it takes a shadow demon like me to let them through. And I'll die before I'll let that happen."

  Oh. “That's why . . . the knife?"

  "Yes.” He buried his face in my neck. “You see, though any full shadow demon can pass bodily through the dimensions, not every one can help their kind pass through the dimensions. Only a few special ones throughout history.” He paused, then added, “Like my great-grandfather and everyone descended from him."

  That bit of news hit me like a slug in the gut. “Ohmigod, Shade, it's not your fault,” I hurried to assure him. “You're not responsible for the stupid things your great-grand-demon did.” When Shade remained silent and unmoving, I added, “Besides, if he hadn't, neither of us would be alive today. Or people like Micah either."

  "I know."

  But he didn't sound as if it made any difference in his self-blame. “Can they come through at other times?"

  "Maybe. If I get too angry.” He gave me a wry grin. “You wouldn't like me when I'm angry."

  So that's what Micah had meant. Images of a swirly green Hulk swam through my mind, but I dismissed them. To distract him, I asked, “So you know a lot about the different kinds of demons?"

  "Some."

  "Do you, uh, think it's possible that I have some other kind of demon in me?"

  "No. Not possible. We can't interbreed."

  No? Well, I guess that meant no shadowy lust demon rug rats were in the offing. Good to know. But I wondered why Micah didn't know it when Shade did. And what could explain me and my unusual strength?

  Before I could ask, Shade said, “I don't want to talk about this anymore. Can we change the subject?"

  "Okay,” I said reluctantly. I'd ask him later, when he wasn't still shaken up by keeping back the demon horde. “What do you want to talk about?"

  "Did you really offer to work for the Movement?"

  Surprised, I pulled away for a moment. “Did Micah tell you that?"

  "No, Fang told Princess."

  And Princess, of course, never met a secret she didn't blab instantly. “Great spy she'd make,” I muttered.

  He pulled me back. “At least someone told me about it. You didn't really mean it, did you? You wouldn't work for the vampires?"

  He looked so concerned, I squirmed a little. “Yes, I gave my word.” But before he could say anything else, I added, “But only if another vamp gets poisoned or a demon tries to harm a vamp."

  "Tries to . . . or succeeds?"

  I thought back to our conversation, trying to remember exactly what I'd said. “Uh, I said ‘tries to',” I admitted, “but I'm sure he knows I meant if he succeeded."

  "I hope you're right,” Shade said, but he looked like he doubted it. “They're dangerous, love. Very dangerous. And I don't care how civilized Alejandro seems, vampire nests have been known to chew up and spit out anyone who isn't just like them."

  "I can take care of myself,” I assured him.

  "Against one or two, sure. But against many, some of whom hold your future in their hands?"

&nbs
p; He looked a lot more worried than the situation called for. Soothingly, I said, “Don't worry. It won't happen. We'll find the thief, stop the bad guys, and all will be right with the world.” Seeing he still looked skeptical, I kissed him to take his mind off the subject. “Can we not talk about this any more?” I asked, echoing his earlier words.

  He shook his head, but seemed willing to drop it. Then, wickedly, he said, “Well, since we're both half naked and all . . . “

  He kissed my neck and I dissolved into putty in his arms once again. Wow, that felt . . . awesome. Lola perked up again, glad it was time to play. Desire, warm and languid, played back and forth between Shade and me.

  "Feed on me,” Shade whispered between soft kisses on the swell of my breasts. “Make me forget I'm a shadow demon.” He licked the curve of my breast along the line of my bra. “Take back the sustenance you gave me."

  Oh, my. Suddenly, it seemed like we were both wearing too many clothes, and I ached in places that had never felt a guy's touch. I lost all control of Lola and she surged into him, wanting, needing, demanding. Lust curled between us, warm and thick as molasses, flowing back and forth and making me feel languid yet aching for a sensation I'd never experienced.

  "Hold on a sec,” he whispered. Shade let go of me and slid off the bed to lock the door. He removed his shoes, socks, knife sheath, jeans, then his boxers. Though he stood there, obviously totally naked, I couldn't see anything but his shadow demon swirls. They'd calmed down a lot but still obscured every part of his body, making him look like a hologram filled with eddying gray smoke. Oddly enough, the center of the swirls seemed concentrated right below his abdomen.

  He reached out his hand and I gulped. Did I really want to see what was at the center? My face turned hot and I waffled mentally.

  "It's okay, Val,” he said softly. “You don't have to do anything you don't want to do."

  Slowly, wondering what the heck I was doing, I extended my hand slowly until it touched his, bringing his body into sharp focus. This was the first fully nude man I'd ever seen, and I couldn't help but gape. And I'd thought he was gorgeous before . . . Oh, my. Heat spread through me, and I didn't know what to do. I wanted to see, but I didn't. Not understanding the sensations rushing through me, I stood up and propelled myself into his arms so I wouldn't have to look anymore. Sheesh, could I be any more idiotic?