Bossman's List

by Ashlee Price

“You never seem to make goodbyes any easier love.”

  “Something to remember me by.”

  He growled at her and set her back so that she wouldn’t make him late for his own drive. She had a way of making nothing else matter, and like Elna, Marcel was wishing that his brother had the same thing. To have a woman’s love like that, a man could do anything. Lisa was perfect for him and he hoped that Scott would get it together and realize it sooner than later. It certainly had made his life easier once he stopped fighting it and figured it out for himself.

  When he got downstairs he was surprised to see Scott already at the table. He had a pack next to him at the seat and he was eating leftovers.

  “Good morning. I can’t believe you are up.”

  “Need to eat before we go. You know I hate all that dried crap for the next week that we are going to be eating. I brought some beans.”

  Marcel just shook his head. “Is that all you ever think of?”

  Scott turned to him all serious. “No, but for now it is better than what else I can come up with. You can always just give me the name and we can stop the whole charade.”

  He shook his head and then Scott turned back to his bowl. “That is what I figured. I will be ready in a minute. Let’s get this over with.”

  ***

  “What’s wrong baby?”

  Lisa shrugged the touch from her shoulders. David was staying over again and though he was nice, kind, gentle, all of the things that Scott wasn’t, it wasn’t making her happy. She never wanted the breakup to begin with, but going out and finding something to replace the hole in her had not worked out as well as she had hoped it would. Instead she was still just as empty as before, but now had another person’s emotions to deal with and that was hard enough to deal with past her own.

  She looked at the tall man and sighed. He was handsome, but he was no Scott. Turning away and going to the kitchen, Lisa was glad that he couldn’t read her mind. He would have gotten his feelings hurt, just like he was about to get his feelings hurt when she told him that she didn’t want to see him again. It had all just happened too fast and the last thing that she wanted to do was hurt David, but she knew she was going to have to.

  “Do you want me to make you some breakfast?”

  David smiled and nodded, oblivious that he was about to be dumped. “That would be great. I love your pancakes.”

  She turned around to not see the sappy look on his face. It just made it worse. It just made her feel guiltier about it all. Lisa poured him some juice. He didn’t drink coffee and though it felt weird, she had tried the orange juice with him. She needed coffee though and was starting to make a case in her head against David. How could she be with a man that drank juice instead of coffee? It was silly, but there weren’t many other reasons besides the obvious one of Scott.

  “I was hoping that you would want to go out today. You know like on a real date where we went into public and had a bite to eat.”

  “No, I don’t think that will work. I have lunch with Gemma and then I am going to work at 2.”

  His face fell a little before he could pull it back in. “I am starting to think that you don’t want to be seen with me.”

  He would be right, she thought to herself. She was no stranger to what Scott could do when he was mad. A man had touched her ass at a bar and he had broken his hand. At the time she had been mortified, but there was a comfort in his effectiveness. Lisa was saving David from a beat down and he didn’t even know it.

  “It’s not like that, but with my ex…”

  “I’m not afraid of him.

  You should be. “Well I just don’t see the point of rubbing it in his nose is all, just tacky.” She said it with such distain that he couldn’t argue.

  “I just don’t like that I can’t take you out and show you off. I know there is history, but you are with me now.”

  She didn’t answer him as she whisked the batter up. Lisa was feeling less and less comfortable with the situation as it was and she was really hoping that she would think of a way to make it somehow make it all make sense to the young man. He was a few years younger, but had a lot of growing to do as far as most things were considered.

  They had breakfast and she started out the conversation with that they needed to talk. She tried to let him off easy, it’s not him, it’s her, but he didn’t react well no matter how the message was given. He didn’t want to break up, but Lisa didn’t tell him they were never together. It was just a little fling to help not feel the emptiness, but she knew now that it was futile. Lisa couldn’t help it if he had gotten attached. She still loved Scott and there was no more of her heart to give. The man already had it all.

  Chapter 10

  It was the second day on the drive and though Scott wasn’t talking to his brother as much as Marcel would have liked, there was no way to carry too much inside with the outside so pretty. There were no houses and power lines to ruin the view and Scott spent most of his time just thinking about how he got to where he was and what he was going to do next. He missed Lisa, but knew deep down that if she was happy with the new guy, he didn’t want to ruin that for her.

  He had missed his chance. He knew that now and though he still had the need to beat in the face of anyone that touched her, Marcel’s plan was working. Every hour out there in the silence and beauty, working the animals, brought him further away from the point that he would ask for the name when they got back. Scott still might, but he wasn’t sure. It was getting harder to imagine it as the anger dissipated out of him.

  The worst part of it all as he looked at the rolling meadow in front of him, was the realization that it was in fact his fault. He should have scooped her up years ago and since he had refused to, it was hard to imagine a woman like her staying single long. Scott didn’t think he was ever going to be able to replace her and he couldn’t even imagine trying. That is what hurt most for him. His anger was at himself for giving up the most important thing that he had in his life.

  “Are you ready to stop for the day?”

  Scott shrugged. He didn’t care either way. The sun had another half hour or so before it was down for good, but his body was tired. He hadn’t been getting much sleep, still not adjusted to sleeping alone. “That’s fine. We got a bit longer though. I don’t see the point of wasting the daylight but if you are getting too old for the long rides, I can understand that.”

  Marcel just chuckled and pulled up on the horse. They were at a good place to stop for the night. The animals were already going to the river for water, while others were eating. They still had another ten miles or so upriver to go before they crossed in the morning. It was the place they always went over and quickly the cows were moving into the river and across it.

  When their heads bobbed as they started to swim, it was when chaos started to ensue. There were too many of them and the river was just too wide and deep. Marcel was already off his horse, thinking that they were going to be able to stop for the night, but it was quickly clear that it was not going to happen. A small black newborn that was only a few days old was moving away from his mother as the swift water started to sweep him away.

  Scott was into the river with the horse and up to his waist in the water before he could lasso the wretched creature out of the water that was becoming a swirling mass of black and white froth from movement. Marcel was back on his own horse and chasing after another small brown dot that was getting pulled into the surf. The larger cows seemed to be doing better, but they didn’t like the water and even their large bodies were feeling the effects of the force of water. It made them moo and try to move faster through the fray.

  When Marcel looked over to look for his brother, his horse was on the other side of the river, as well as the calf with a rope still dangling around his neck, but Marcel couldn’t see Scott. He was wearing dark coat with dark jeans and as the light faded rather swiftly, it was getting harder to see into the water. The animals were making such a racket and churning up the water, it wa
s several minutes until Marcel could get around them to where he last seen his brother. Looking further down, he thought he saw him washing up on the sandy shore.

  His heart was pounding in his chest as he made his way to him. Marcel’s horse wasn’t moving fast enough, but he doubted that any amount of speed would have been enough. When he got to him he wasn’t conscious and it looked like he wasn’t breathing.

  Marcel had never had to give a man CPR before, but he tried to imitate the scenes in movies that made it look so easy. It didn’t help that his hands were shaking and he was terrified that something was going to happen to him. He wouldn’t be able to live with himself, insisting that they went early and with two less people than usual.

  “Come on, Scott. You stubborn ass, breathe!”

  Smacking his chest with the last words, he had given up on the technique and Scott started to cough up water. He had blood coming from a wound in his head and he winced when he moved, but Marcel had never been so happy to see him smile. “You okay?”

  He shook his head that he wasn’t.

  “Well you are here. Welcome back.”

  “Did the calf make it?”

  Marcel shook his head. “Who cares about that calf, Scott? I thought I had lost you.”

  ***

  “I just wanted to see you. I heard what happened from Gemma and I had to make sure you were okay.”

  Scott had been thinking about her and as she came closer to where he was laying, his eyes drank in the sight of her. Her teeth nibbled on the bottom of his lip, telling him that she was nervous.

  “I’m better now that you are here.”

  Lisa smiled at him, already feeling relaxed. She had missed him and when she heard that something had almost happened to him on the cattle drive and they had to come back early, Lisa couldn’t stop herself from going down there to make sure that he was actually okay. She had to see it with her own eyes. She leaned in to give him a hug before she could stop herself.

  He winced and hissed out of his teeth and she pulled back. “Sorry, are you okay?”

  Scott nodded that he was, even though she had elbowed him in one of his broken ribs. It didn’t matter though. She was there and it was all that mattered. Lisa had been all he could think about for so long and the smell of her shampoo reminded him of so many good times. His body reacted to seeing her as if he hadn’t seen her in years. Scott had missed her terribly and the last thing he wanted was for her to leave.

  “It will be fine, Lisa. Just a few bruises.”

  “Gemma said that you broke a bunch of ribs and had a concussion.”

  “You know how Gemma is.”

  “What happened?”

  He gave her the short version and her eyes widened when he got to the end. It made her think of the what-ifs and losing him would have been something that she simply couldn’t have gotten over. “I miss you, Scott.”

  It was all she could say. Her voice was quiet and it was hard for her to look him in the eyes. She was sitting down next to him on the bed and looking down at the pattern on the comfort. “I’ve missed you more than I ever thought it was possible to miss someone, Lisa.”

  Scott touched her hand and pulled it into his, resting it on his bruised chest. Her blue eyes finally met his dark ones and there was a familiarity that she never wanted with someone else. She could read his soul and that was far more important than any piece of paper. If all she got was him, it was going to be enough and Scott getting hurt made her realize that.

  “I don’t want to marry and have kids, Scott. If I can’t do those things with you, then they just aren’t for me. Not all women have kids and I already have two nieces. I don’t care about getting married. I just want you. Can’t we go back to the way things were?” Her eyes held the desperation she felt. Lisa just wanted them back and that was it. It was all her fault for getting greedy and wanting more.

  “No.”

  Her heart sank and she pulled her hand away. “Why not? Because of David?”

  “David? That was who it was? The guy from the feed store?”

  She started to get up. “Yes.”

  “Are you with him now?”

  Lisa shook her head. “How can I be with anyone when I love you? There is no one else for me. I was with David to feel something and then it wasn’t there. It wasn’t worth my time. I don’t want anyone else but you and when you just pushed me aside it hurt.”

  “I know. I don’t blame you for that, Lisa. Just know that.”

  “Then why can’t we go back to the way it was? You know that we were good together.”

  “Because you want more.’

  “I want you, Scott.” Lisa could hear the need going back in her voice. The same feeling of her throat closing up and her world caving in as before when he had told her that it was over.

  “I should have asked you to marry me a long time ago. You are who I want and I am sorry that I was so pig-headed about it. I thought that marriage would be like being put out to pasture and I wasn’t ready for that. But I love you, Lisa, and there is nothing more that I want to do than get married to you.”

  She looked at his face to make sure that he was being truthful. It was what she had always wanted to hear and Lisa was afraid that her mind had made it up for that very reason. “I love you too, Scott.”

  “So will you marry me?”

  There was no ring or grand gesture on his knees, but it was perfect. It was all she had every wanted and he could have stuck a candy ring on her and it would have been enough. “Of course I will, Scott. But I don’t want you to feel forced. We can just keep on as we are. I am perfectly fine with it.”

  “I know, but I’m not. I don’t ever want to lose you again.”

  Lisa rushed down to give him another kiss, ignoring the wince of pain. He was just going to have to deal with it because she was too happy to not give him a kiss.

  “You aren’t on any pain meds or anything, are you, Scott? Cause I am holding you to this.”

  “You better.”

  Chapter 11

  “Why are you taking so long Scott? I have been waiting forever. I know you are crippled now.”

  “I am not crippled. I got cleared by the doctor today.”

  “Oh really? What did he clear you for?”

  Scott moved towards her and kissed her lips. They were supposed to be going to a dinner at the ranch, but he wanted to stay around and see what happened there first. It had been weeks since he was able to touch her, over a month since they first split up and Scott was sick of waiting. Lisa had taken care of his needs many times and he had returned the favor as good as he could, but it just wasn’t enough. What he really needed was to feel her underneath him and around him. Scott needed both embraces to be complete and as his tongue moved into her mouth, Lisa was starting to react the way he wanted her to.

  Lisa had been afraid of hurting him. There had been a couple of times that Scott had gotten a little too riled up and hurt himself. He didn’t seem worried about it, anxious to do it again, but Lisa hated to see him hurting, even if he tried to pretend like he wasn’t. Scott seemed sturdier that day, something was in him and her body was starting to feel the same awakening.

  “I don’t think you are ready Scott. I am afraid I am going to hurt you.”

  Scott’s tongue lines her earlobe and made her shiver. “I thought I was the one that usually said that.” His hot breath and light words made her tremble even harder. Lisa didn’t want him to stop touching her, her body yearning for more. Their makeup had not been complete and by the look in his dark eyes, he was about to rectify that.

  “You won’t. Even if you did I wouldn’t care, but you won’t. Don’t worry about it.”

  It was hard to think about anything else but the lips at her jaw, then throat and then along one shoulder. He pushed her down onto her soft mattress and her eyes fell on the scarf she had been putting on before he came in and made her brain go to mush. Pushing away softly on his chest, she tried to sit up a little. “We are suppose
d to be going to dinner, remember?”

  He nodded like he was listening, but they both knew that he wasn’t. His eyes were on the swell of breasts that kept rising and falling with the labored breath. The longer he stared the more aroused she became, only making the whole issue even worse than before. She had always been breathtaking, but there was something in the idea that she was his, soon to be officially. Scott felt like he had won the lottery, but he would not be giving his family any satisfaction that they were right.

  “I want my dessert first.”

  Scott’s hands moved up her thigh, pushing the skirt up to view the tiny pink panties that made him even more needy until his hands were shaking. He wanted everything to be perfect, but she looked too beautiful and Lisa was not helping his control with her sounds of need. When she went to begging him to take her, it was hard for Scott to not oblige her. His searching hands became more forceful, ripping her underwear off of her with a ripping sound and a hard jerk. Lisa whimpered as she felt the cool air on her overheated skin.

  “Please Scott.”

  He wanted to savor their first time, but she was just as ravenous as he was. Her small hands were rubbing his hard chest, trying to get her hands on his manhood that was what she truly sought. “Please!”

  Scott growled at her, sitting back long enough to release his need and climb back on top of her. He pulled a muscle that made him groan, but she didn’t seem to notice, pulling him down, her lips searching out his. Opening her legs, her hips lifted up to help him along. He didn’t know who was in control at that moment. When he slipped an inch inside of her suffocating heat, it didn’t matter who had control or who had started it. All that mattered was what was going on in those seconds.

  Lisa said his name low in her throat, the sound bringing back a surge of memories and he pressed deeper to hear the gasp that he had been waiting to hear for too long. “Damn I have missed you, Lisa.”

  Her eyes were closed and she just nodded in agreement. Small hands and nails gripped his bottom, pushing her towards him closer as he started a slow and steady rhythm inside of her. He had always felt perfect, like he was made for her or something. Moaning out his own sounds, the two were both on the brink of ecstasy when he stopped and looked down at her. “Promise me that I will be your last, Lisa?”