by Allie Hayden
“Well, I can promise you that he’s not going to be able to do anything to hurt my reputation.”
“You don’t know him like I do—” Bella began, looking frantic again, but I abruptly cut her off.
“No, but I have a lot of connections in the media. And good security. He shouldn’t be able to do anything, and if he does, I’m sure I’ll be able to figure out how to move past it. Please don’t worry about it.”
Bella nodded.
“If you want,” Lillian started; I could tell she was choosing her words carefully as she directed this at Bella. “you’re welcome to stay at my apartment—for as long as you need. I know Rebecca won’t mind.”
Lillian flashed a look at Rebecca, who was still sipping her tea and looking as peaceful as ever. Even not knowing this woman at all, Lillian felt the need to offer up her support and protection where she could. I was then reminded of why I fell for Lillian in the first place.
“I have other places I can stay.” Lillian directed the last sentence towards me.
I understood what she meant, and I nodded back, although reluctantly.
Turning back to Bella, I asked, “Does that sound like something you would want to do? In the meantime, I can see what some of my connections can do about this Lucas character. If nothing else, we can at least find you somewhere new to live, and maybe get him to transfer permanently to London.”
“That sounds nice,” she said with a nod, and then tears began to well up in her eyes. “I’m so sorry; I wish I could have taken care of this by myself, but I had no idea what else to do. Thank you so much; you didn’t have to do this.”
“It’s fine,” Lillian said, standing and walking over to sit with Bella. She put her arm around her. “Sometimes things like this happen, and there wasn’t much you could have done.”
“You were right to call me,” I spoke up.
Almost on cue, Coby perched himself up on the couch. As their feline friend, he knew when the humans needed his love. He rubbed his furry head on Bella’s arm to comfort her, meowing in the process. Lillian got up and headed into the kitchen, and I followed suit, knowing she wanted to speak in private after making brief eye contact. We were finally alone and free to talk about what was happening between us.
“Are you okay?” I asked.
“I’m fine, why?”
“You just seemed a little tense.”
She shrugged it off. “It’s not exactly the easiest situation, you know?”
“I know.”
“And I’m trying my best, but I still feel weird, you know? She had a relationship with you― you know her, and I don’t, and I don’t know anything about what you two were to each other.”
I let out a half-hearted laugh. Some things you just couldn’t hide.
“Lily, I would hardly call it a relationship. We satisfied each other’s needs for a bit, that’s all.” I said.
“But you still were something to each other, even if it wasn’t romantic. I don’t know, I’m sorry, I’m trying my best not to make this weird.”
“It’s okay; this is my fault. It’s my mess, and I’m responsible for fixing it. I’m sorry I had to get you into the mix of all this. I hope you’ll forgive me.”
“Of course,” she said with a nod.
Things were still awkward and not back to normal yet. But this time alone, the tension in the air had more to do with our mutual attraction towards each other more than anything else. We both blushed as we found themselves in this peculiar predicament.
I was the first one to make a move, and I grabbed Lillian’s hands, holding them in my own. “Let’s try this again, Lillian.”
Lillian held back her blushing face as I felt the butterflies in my stomach resurfacing. She let out a half-hearted laugh, trying to make the situation less serious.
“I was hoping you would say that.”
We got into my car and started our way to my apartment. It felt almost like a dream, that this was all happening. One moment, Lillian was out of my life, and now the next…I really didn’t want to jinx myself. Although, I did have to pinch myself to make sure it was all real.
As we were driving, a song by Dreams of Compass Gods came on, and I immediately changed the channel, glancing over at Lillian to make sure she was okay. She was. Of course, she was. It had been a while since the whole thing had happened. But I knew she might’ve not wanted to listen to their music at the moment. I didn’t mention to her about my little run-in with him either.
A short conversation later, and we were on back at my apartment. It felt strange, Lillian staying with me in this way after we had just entered a new kind of relationship, but I didn’t particularly mind it. Far from it, in fact.
The idea of spending more time together absolutely delighted me, especially in such a place as intimate as my home. If we were younger, maybe we would have attempted to have sex again, like old times. But as it was, we were now adults, and we were tired, both having work the next day.
How much I wished it was a Friday instead of a Sunday, that tomorrow was Saturday instead of Monday. Because then we could have the whole weekend, just the two of us all alone in this large, expensive apartment. And I knew that we could find no end to the ways in which we could entertain ourselves and each other. But I was trying my best to keep back from yawning, and when we finally got the chance to sit down, I turned to Lillian with a sleepy look and asked, “Bedtime?”
“Bedtime,” Lillian agreed.
We both looked at each other with knowing eyes, both of us wanting to put off ‘the talk’ for tomorrow. Sleepily, we dragged ourselves in my bedroom.
It didn’t take long to fall asleep.
25. (Bella)
Back at the apartment, it was just Rebecca and me alone. It was a nice little apartment that Rebecca had, quite nice, I thought to myself, if small. The living room was decorated with a level of taste that many people failed to acquire—a few bright accent colors that warmed up the place along with a selection of neutral tones.
“Are you hungry?” Rebecca asked.
“No, I’m okay. Thank you.” I didn’t want to trouble her any more than I was already.
“Well, how about you help me on some of these orders?”
Rebecca pulled out her basket of yarns and knitting needles, passing a pair to me. She grabbed it and picked up a yellow ball of yarn, unraveling one of the ends, and starting her double stitch. Rebecca was really lovely and kind. There was a relaxing feeling I got when I sat in the room with her, just knitting away to the ticking of the clock in the background.
After a few minutes, I brought myself back into the real world, wondering what all this knitting was for. “Do you run a knitting business or something?”
Surprised, Rebecca responded, “I do. And I’m getting pretty busy. It’s nice being able to stay at home and play with Coby all day.” Coby stalked over to the two of us and laid himself out for us to pet his tummy.
“He’s pretty cute,” I said, rubbing Coby on the stomach.
“He likes you. He has good taste.” Rebecca gave me a little flirty wink, and I didn’t know what to make of it.
I blushed, not knowing what Rebecca was getting at. Either way, my feelings were becoming unfamiliar. I’d never experienced this reaction towards a girl before. I remembered back in elementary school when I had found that I had fondness for a girl in pigtails, although, at this moment, I could not recall her name.
“Let’s keep working,” I said, wanting to change the subject as a feeling of warmth crept up in-between my legs.
We worked diligently into the night, not realizing how late it was getting. We’d become so lost in the work that I forgot I was even tired. Then after a while longer, I decided it was time for bed. Rebecca showed me into Lillian’s bedroom; this was where I would stay for the time being.
But before Rebecca could close the door, I perched my head up and said, “Hey, do you think you might be able to stay up with me for a little bit longer?”
Rebecca blinked sle
ep away from her eyes, and I immediately felt guilty for asking, but Rebecca replied with a somber, “Sure, what do you need?”
“It’s…it’s nothing. I can tell you’re tired.”
Rebecca laughed, and I felt something stir within me. Just a little bit of something.
“I mean, yeah, I am, but I’m also self-employed. There’s no particular time I have to get up tomorrow, and there’s always coffee to keep me awake. So what is it you need?”
I nodded in appreciation as I stood up, walking with Rebecca back into the living room where we sat on the couch again.
“I don’t know if I can go to sleep just yet, you know, with everything going on. I still feel…I don’t know exactly how to say it. I just know that I don’t want to be alone.”
“Of course,” Rebecca said with a nod. “I can understand that. Now, do you want some tea? Maybe a mug cake? I can make one of those in the microwave in about two minutes, though I can’t promise it’ll be the tastiest thing you’ve ever eaten.”
I thought for a moment, thrown back to my college days when I had made many a thing in the microwave. My face lit up then. “Have you ever made pizza in the microwave?”
“I mean, I’ve microwaved pizza before, sometimes even those frozen ones that you’re really supposed to bake, but full-on make a pizza?”
“It’s not exactly a full pizza, but you can make it in the microwave, given a mug,” I explained with a smile, loving the expression that Rebecca’s face was making. Something between confusion, apprehension, and absolute childish delight.
“Okay, well, you’ve got to show me how to make this now. I’m not going to be able to rest until I taste this magic microwave mug pizza.”
I laughed, and I thought to myself that this was a real laugh. I was genuinely enjoying myself. I was connecting with someone that I met only a few hours ago.
“Well, come on then; we have to be in the kitchen to make these ‘magic’ pizzas,” I teased.
Rebecca followed me into the kitchen, and I felt a bit of shyness walking in front of her, as I was wearing a pair of flowing silk pants, a tight shirt, and a very soft-looking sweater. I knew that I could come off a bit seductive to men, especially in clothes I didn’t even realize were coming off that way. But I was getting that feeling again with Rebecca. But I giggled as we found ourselves in the kitchen together.
Between the exchange of laughter and throwing bits of food at each other, the rest of the night was a blur. We had finished making our mini pizzas, they were quite good, and I was surprised at what could come from just a few ingredients and the creativity it took to fit everything into a single cup.
I remembered we were laughing and giggling on the couch, up late, talking about old college days and our dorm room stories. There was a mixture of touching and rubbing each other’s arms. At one point of the night, I remembered having my legs propped up onto Rebecca’s thighs, as we leaned into each other to finish off our stories. She brushed a piece of my hair out of my face and put it behind my ear, and I just remembered drifting off to sleep, right there on the couch.
It was late I finally woke up; I could tell by the sun in the sky. I was still feeling exhausted though. It probably didn’t help how late Rebecca and I had stayed up the night before, exchanging stories as bad TV played in the background. It turned out that the two of us had a lot in common, especially in the creative field.
Though Rebecca was someone I would probably describe as a messy creative. I was the type that worked better when things were organized, clean, and methodical. But Rebecca’s creative process was wonderfully haphazard. She learned things quickly and made stuff up as she went. I figured that meant that Rebecca might’ve not had the best technique out of a lot of people I knew, but she certainly had an abundance of creative energy and innovative ideas.
I yawned, stretching myself out. I unearthed myself from a pile of blankets that were on the couch. I still felt groggy, and I thought I would take a shower and hopefully that would make me feel fresher. So, I hopped into the tiny attached bathroom and stripped, humming bits of songs from Swan Lake to myself as I set the water running and found a towel to use.
As the hot water ran down my body and the steam enveloped me, I found I could finally have some space to think. It wasn’t something I particularly enjoyed at this moment, especially with how much was going on, but to my surprise, the person in my thoughts was mainly Rebecca. I had only met her last night but could already feel a connection forming between us.
And whether that was an oddly interesting connection or something more…only time would tell. I supposed I had been attracted to other women before, but in my experience, it was much rarer than my attraction to men. It had to be a very particular type of connection, and even then, I usually had trouble distinguishing feelings of friendship from that of romance until it was too late.
As a result, I had never been in a relationship with someone of the same gender before. It made me feel awkward about my sexuality, and I usually tried my best to repress it, or not think about it. I sometimes felt as if my feelings were normal, and every adolescent went through similar experiences.
But this…this felt like it might be a little more real. It was just a little too soon to start to explore anything. The thought haunted me as I finished my shower and completed the rest of my morning ritual, doing a little bit of stretching in the small space to try to ease my muscles into the day.
Only then did I dare glance at the clock.
Two in the afternoon.
Fuck.
No way I was going into work today. Not that I was planning to originally. I would rather have some space away from Lucas for the moment. Especially because I didn’t want there to be any chance of him following me home, not back to Rebecca’s. That would just put more people in danger.
I quickly sent a text to my supervisor, and then exited Lillian’s bedroom after getting changed in there. I blinked back the brightness of the daylight that flooded the rest of the apartment. Rebecca was already in the kitchen, making up what I assumed to be sandwiches when I saw the opened loaf of Wonder Bread sitting on the counter.
“Hey, sleepyhead,” she said with a sheepish smile, “Glad to see you finally decided to get up.”
“Yeah, me too. I’m definitely not going to work today,” I said with a laugh.
“That being said,” Rebecca sliced a finished sandwich in half, putting it into a Tupperware, sounding a little hesitant, or maybe nervous, “would you like to come to the park with me to eat lunch? There’s a small one nearby, and I usually go to make sure I get outside every day.”
“Of course,” I smiled. “I’d love to go. Do you need any help with those?” I gestured at where Rebecca was making up our lunch.
She shook her head. “Nah, I got it under control. Besides, I have no idea if you have the ability to make anything besides a mug pizza, so I’ll take care of this for the moment.”
“Are you doubting my cooking ability?” I raised my eyebrows as she took a seat at one of the connected dining room chairs.
“Not necessarily.”
“You so are.”
“Am not!”
“Prove it then.”
“You prove that you can cook!”
“Aha, so you do doubt me.” I pointed an accusatory finger at Rebecca with a laugh, who looked about as if deflecting guilt.
“I’m just saying I’ve only seen you make pizza in the microwave.”
“Fine then. I’ll make dinner tonight, and then you’ll see just how wonderful I am.” I flipped my hair over my shoulder with a casual motion.
“It’s a deal then.”
“Deal.”
We broke out into laughter, partially at the absolute absurdity of the situation, and when we were finished, Rebecca packed up the rest of our lunches into a little tote bag. She came around from behind the kitchen counter and offered her hand to me and pulled me up to my feet.
“Shall we be off?” she asked.
“Most definitely.”
Rebecca led the way through the quaint little neighborhood to the nearby park, setting up a blanket under one of the larger trees. I sighed as I sat down, looking up at the sky above with so many wistful thoughts running through my mind. There were so many things I could have gone after school, so many things that I could have chosen to do with my life, and somehow, I was here, at the park, about to have a picnic with a new friend.
Rebecca began pulling out the sandwiches and handed one to me.
“I should have asked,” she said before I started eating, “you don’t have any dietary preferences or allergies, right?”
“Not that I know of,” I said with a wink, digging in.
26. (Sebastian)
The day was bright; the sun shone through the blinds of the apartment; bright and early; illuminating the entire floor. Lillian wanted to kill the infernal alarm clock when it rang that morning as she lifted her arms in protest. We were in no particular mood to get out of bed, especially with how little sleep we had gotten the evening before.
In the morning when the cuddles were the best, the two of us snuggled under the sheets. And then I kissed her, and I forgot about everything. My good-morning kisses were sweet to her. They were filled with a longing for more time so that we might have the opportunity to know each other again before it was time to rush off to work. I then realized that this was the first kiss we shared since a long time ago. And it felt so good to be extra affection towards her and blaming it on our grogginess.
“If you get up and get ready,” I said, my voice a little broken still from sleep, “I’ll make you breakfast.”
It was a tempting offer, but Lillian’s eyelids were half-closed, barely being able to keep them open.
“Can’t we just stay home today?” she pleaded, kissing me and drawing me back down next to her. She wrapped her arms around my sturdy waist so that my back was pulled into her stomach. “I’ll be the big spoon.”
Slowly, I extricated myself from her arms, as if it hurt me to do so. “No matter how tempting that offer is, I think you and I both know that we have important work to do today. I wouldn’t be surprised if your editor—what’s her name again? Mable?—wants to talk to you about your next story. So you better be ready to go by the time I finish making breakfast—or else.”