My Life as An Amish Wife

by Lena Yoder

  The girls’ playhouse has changed to a store right now. Sometimes I go to the pantry to get an item I want and can’t find it. I’m pretty positive I still have some, so I search some more. Then it dawns on me, “Oh, it’s probably out in the store!” Jolisa is exactly as I remember myself at her age. Having a store was a huge dream, and I had one on our old back porch for a long time. Making paper money, signs… well, anything having to do with a store and paper, was a blast. I wonder how many receipt books I filled out for my pretend customers. I saved all the paper too—anything, for that matter, until my drawers moaned and groaned and bulged under the weight. I wish I could ask my mom some questions now. I’m sure of the fact that she would agree Jolisa inherited my jumpy busyness. I have slowed down though. Oh my, yes I sure have.

  “Be joyful in hope, patient in affliction, faithful in prayer” (Romans 12:12 NIV). God’s promises are still that: God’s promises. Even in these perilous times we live in. He did not promise us all joys and no sorrows, but he did promise to be with us every step of the way.

  For these last several months, it seems God has shut off all water faucets from the heavens. No rain period. Every morning the sun comes up gorgeous; every night the sun goes down gorgeous. A long time ago they said if we don’t get rain in the next few days the crops will surely fail. That was weeks ago and still no rain. Our corn has had less than half-an-inch of rain since the planting in May. You can only imagine what it looks like.

  We do water the garden a bit, but does it justify the money spent on diesel to pump the water? I had thought the green beans looked decent because the plants were loaded with flowers. When I went out to pick the first picking, the bugs had eaten into many of the beans. As I picked, I threw away at least half of the beans. I promptly sprayed the plants and hope to harvest enough to can later. I’m guessing the insect’s food supply is low too, and they were searching for new delectables. The yellow summer squash plants died on me too. We’ve only gotten enough of those for one meal, and then it wasn’t enough for Wayne and me. We let the children eat them.

  We had high hopes of feeding heifers again this winter with our own feed. We are again reminded of who is in control. We are just as children. We sometimes need to be reminded in a clear, loud voice and learn to be content as the Lord sees fit. I thank him for the reminder.

  The week of July Fourth my sister Freda and some of her family from Oklahoma visited here for a week. During that time we had two big family reunions here, so we had cleaned the shop good for those days. Now for church in two weeks we only need to give it a good going over. That was the week of 110 degrees. Mercy! We did survive. It took a lot of water. The evening we had the Rabers (my mom’s family) here it took 25 gallons of water.

  Since Freda was here she’s gained another granddaughter named Edna Irene. That name is mighty precious and gave me a fresh dose of longing to see my mom, whose name was Edna.

  This morning Karah and Emily were again doing laundry. With cleaning for church, there is always laundry to do. It almost makes me sick though because it’s so terribly dusty. Cleaning seems to be in vain. Even the laundry comes back in from the lines dusty.

  Halfway into laundry, the girls convinced me to wash the upstairs bedding, doilies, and curtains. They’d much rather clean the whites (sashes) of the windows. I thought they didn’t know what they were getting into. I’d much rather do the laundry then wash those whites. I took up their plea, and they did super.

  This afternoon Karah ironed the doilies and some of the curtains while I washed the upstairs windows. The two girls put all the things back in place. They want to be stylish so they hardly have anything standing on their furniture, especially nothing childish. They were all excited because I finally took the time to paint some sayings and daisies on their walls. Now they sigh and say they still need to get rid of those girlie curtains. They really need something more mature. I should say so. After all, they are 11, 10, and 8. Mature indeed.

  Yesterday I scrubbed and rewaxed the kitchen floor. After all the time and energy it took, it doesn’t feel clean as it normally does. I discovered because of the open windows dust had settled on the wet wax and dried into the finished product. It appears clean but is a tad rough.

  I’ve had to think of the people in Kansas who endured the “dirty ’30s.” We might not have dust storms, but we do have a lot of traffic on our dirt road, including semitrucks, school buses, cement trucks, dump trucks, and hordes of other traffic. They don’t go slow just because I don’t like the dust. No, they’ve got places to go to in a hurry. I guess I’m thankful for that too. All this traffic means the world is going on, and people have work and places to go. But must they go so fast?

  For supper tonight I used a grill basket to grill chunks of button mushrooms, green and red peppers, onions, pineapple, and smoked sausages. We love kabobs, but it is easier to just toss it all into the grill basket. I tossed a salad of cucumbers, cauliflower, and lettuce. For dessert we had fresh peaches and blueberries. Pure summer!

  Last week one evening I made homemade tortillas. We filled them with grilled chicken breast strips, onions, peppers, sour cream, and BBQ sauce. These were delicious. They were also very simple to make and were filled with whatever we had on hand.

  I told Wayne that with the cabbage ripe in the garden I want to make egg rolls again. Several of the children groaned, but I want them to give egg rolls one more chance. I didn’t like them the first time I ate them either.

  With school starting before long, I will have some major withdrawal symptoms to deal with. Withdrawal from my girls. I’ll be lost without their help. It’ll just be Jesse and me. And Jacob, who cries outside the door if we ignore him for too long. I tease Wayne that he talks sweeter to the dog than he does to me.

  Karah will be in the sixth grade this year, Emily in the fourth, and Jolisa in the third. Karah and Emily are growing like weeds, catching up with me. Jolisa is still quite a bit shorter than her sisters. She’s curly haired, freckled, and always bouncy. She’s gotten the brunt of washing dishes this summer. Jesse was to help her this forenoon, but finally she couldn’t handle his dawdling so she sent him on his merry way.

  I wanted to treat the girls to a day in town before school started, so this morning I did the laundry. By 8:00, Brian, Karah, Emily, Jolisa, Jesse, and I went to the Shipshewana Flea Market to get school shoes and some dishrags I really like. We also loaded up on socks. We didn’t get much else. It all fit in one handbag, minus the shoes.

  It was 12:00 by the time we were done at the flea market. We met my sister-in-law Nettie and her six daughters at East of Chicago Pizza for lunch. We had met them at the flea market, so we planned to meet for lunch. The children all thought it was a grand idea.

  After a leisurely lunch we walked across the road to the fabric store. I bought fabric for Sunday dresses for Karah, Emily, and Jolisa. I also needed fabric for a shirt for Wayne and school dresses for Emily and Jolisa. By that time I was so tired I could hardly think straight. When I got out to the buggy, Brian informed me with emphasis that we’d taken half an hour. Way too long, according to him. He was very patient with me all day though. In fact, all the children did super.

  On the way to E&S, the bulk-food store, the road was extremely busy, so I dreaded the thought of crossing the road to enter the parking lot and then to get back on the road again. That is a hazard we face going to town with the horse and buggy. We survived but not without stress. Our horse was extremely tired of waiting by then. We had to wait a while on a break in traffic, and then he was a bit unruly.

  We traveled on to Dollar General to stock up on toiletries and cereal, and then we headed home. It was past 3:00 by that time.

  There was laundry and groceries to put away, floors to be swept, a cape and apron to finish for a wedding that Colleen wanted to go to that evening. Plus supper to make, and cucumbers to harvest, and…

  Then a neighbor lady came to ask if we would babysit her small son from 4:00 to 9:30 tonight. That turne
d out to be a big, major blessing because it put pep into the girls’ steps, motivating them to get their jobs done so they could play with Adrian.

  I had to set the timer at five-minute intervals, two for work, and one for babysitting so all was done in perfect fairness. For three sisters born in three years and three months’ time, perfect fairness is very important. Luckily this little Adrian loves their smothering attention.

  Supper was kept extremely simple. Toasted cheese with tomato sandwiches and muskmelons from the garden. The girls finished cleaning up the kitchen and are now spraying off the walks and some of the buggy wheels. Wayne is working on the silage chopper head again. Seems that thing gets lots of attention. He’s just making sure all is in perfect working condition for when harvest begins.

  The girls also got their school supplies ready. I overheard them say that gathering their supplies does make them excited to begin another school year.

  Tomorrow two of my sisters, two sisters-in-law, and my married nieces are coming for a cookout before school starts. I will need to get moving early in the morning to get some cleaning done and prepare the cook site. It’ll take a bunch of coffee to ward off this chill in the air.

  Rain! We’ve had rain! Wonderful, amazing, awesome, fabulous rain! Get the picture? We felt unworthy when those first raindrops came, but how we praised God. The lack of rain was a good lesson for us. Now it seems to rain so easily. We should mow the grass every three days. The corn and hay are growing like crazy and looking amazingly different than several weeks ago. There is a lot of corn that is permanently damaged. It really depends on when it was planted. The weeds grow too. I don’t remember ever seeing so many weeds in the pasture, fencerows, and cornfields.

  Year 5

  Fall

  My mind is filled with many thoughts this morning. Writing my thoughts is soothing to me, so maybe I can find some peace. First and foremost on my mind is Wayne’s mom. In April she was a very sick woman. She pulled through with flying colors, although she had a colostomy. Now four months later she had reversal surgery. The surgery and recovery at the hospital went well. She was released, but two days later she was miserable, admitted to the hospital very sick again. They did surgery again at midnight, as the reversal was failing—filling her with poison. She needed a colostomy again. About an hour after surgery, she had a cardiac arrest. Heroic measures from the staff overcame that.

  It has been a trying time since, as she battled a severe infection and her incision didn’t heal. She’s at the hospital with family members taking turns staying with her and Wayne’s dad.

  This is also the same time of year my mom got sick, and that’s bringing back a lot of memories. It’s now four years since she passed away.

  This time of year is filled with silage chopping, hay making, and fall gardening. It’s corn harvest time too. Indeed this is always a stressful, busy time of year. Wayne wants to fill our silage bunker this week. They want to open the fields on Thursday evening after work and then really push it on Friday evening and Saturday. That will mean late nights, no routine, and fixing a lot of food for the men who help us. The biggest stress for me is the fear of equipment breakdowns, which means money for repairs, plus taking so much longer to get the job done. I tell myself to be more optimistic, but the pessimistic side of me battles for steady ground.

  I really should make out menus and plan on what to bake and when it needs to be baked, so I can keep the cookie jar filled for the men. It’s always easier for me to cook and bake once I’ve decided what I want to make.

  In July we wondered if we would even have a harvest; now we feel abundantly blessed. Those rains were a saving grace for the crops. It is, of course, not like a normal year with moisture at all the right times, but it’s some corn and hay nonetheless.

  My garden is looking abandoned and forlorn. Popcorn, carrots, peppers, tomatoes, and some late beans and lettuce are all that remains. I didn’t get much of anything to can except peppers. Those produced by the gobs once the rains came. I really need more tomato juice, and I’m beginning to panic that more tomatoes won’t ripen before the frost. I have enough salsa and marinara sauce, but I haven’t canned any ketchup or taco sauce. We eat a lot of chili and tomato gravy during the winter, so I really need more juice yet.

  Tomato Gravy

  Talking about tomato gravy… My favorite way of eating tomato gravy is on fried potatoes. I thinly slice potatoes, like potato chips, and fry them. For some reason I think it is better this way than on hash browns. My family also uses saltine crackers crushed on their plates and then covered with gravy. I grew up using bread instead of crackers. This is a tummy-warming meal in the wintertime.

  We haven’t seen the sun on this chilly fall day, but it’s been a pretty day anyway. A busy day, as any Saturday usually is here on our farm. I got up with Colleen at 2:00 this morning to throw things in her lunch pail as she had to go to work early today—her eighteenth birthday of all days. It didn’t take me long to find my way under those warm covers again. I couldn’t sleep right away though. I felt guilty knowing how hard Colleen would work before I would even start my day. I prayed for her until sleep overcame me. The snooze button then got hit way too often before I finally heeded the alarm’s call.

  We enjoyed a leisurely breakfast of sausage links, tomato gravy, and huge mugs of homemade cappuccino. We were a bit too leisurely to begin with because then we had a hard time getting into the right gear for the rest of the day.

  It was Jolisa’s turn to go to town with Ida, so she had the privilege of skipping the weekly cleaning chores. Karah and Emily helped really well with the cleaning, and we were done before noon. While I made a light lunch, Karah baked a chocolate cake. She baked it in two round cake pans with intentions to decorate it for Colleen’s birthday. Emily whipped up some Rich’s topping and Whip’n Ice to use for various dishes in the next few days. They blew up balloons and put those, along with birthday cards and a sign, up in Colleen’s room to surprise her. To top it off, the flower lady brought a bouquet of flowers we could add to Colleen’s collection of surprises.

  When Colleen came home from work we hurriedly put the cake in the pantry so she wouldn’t see it yet. She put her things away and went upstairs with the girls following close behind. When she came downstairs, she wanted to retrieve an item from the pantry. Karah and Emily’s anxiety levels skyrocketed! I quickly volunteered to get her what she wanted, and at the same time Karah and Emily both said, “Don’t go in there!” Their giggles exploded. Colleen guessed we were hiding a cake in there, but mum was the word.

  After a quick lunch, I layered the cake with Whip’n Ice, and then frosted it with a thick layer of chocolate frosting. Karah then decorated it. She had a lot of fun. The girls helped me clean up the kitchen, and then I told them the afternoon was theirs but they had to keep the noise level down so Colleen could take a long nap. They promised they would.

  After five-and-a-half weeks at the hospital, Wayne’s mom is now at home. She takes a lot of care with the incision not healed. I wish we lived a short bike ride away so I could go help every day, but the 10 miles is an hour’s drive with the horse and buggy. I try to go at least once a week. Hospice and the county nurse also help. We continue to pray for her healing.

  Let the snow fly! I have in my possession the new Northern Indiana Amish Directory to keep me occupied for quite a while. The cover is a pretty brown color with gold script… very tastefully done. Now the inside is clean white paper—940 pages chock-full of interesting information. For some it was probably very hurtful to see their family in print with a loved one listed as deceased. I know it affected me in a way I cannot describe. So many changes occurred in the five years since the last edition was printed.

  One of the main interests to me is names… and the combination of names a family chooses. Many choose names from a common ground—Bible names, for instance. Some have no rhyme or rhythm. Several years ago I printed a small book with names used by the Amish. Now I am upgrading that again.
I’ve added a lot of new names.

  When we were trying to decide on a name for Karah, we decided to add the “h” because Wayne has a niece Kara. This way we could maybe avoid confusion. I also liked the uniqueness it gave the name.

  When naming Jesse, Wayne wanted to name him after the men he farmed for at one time. Their names were Jesse, Mark Alan, and Lee Alan. So we chose Jesse Alan. Jesse’s initials spell JAY, the name of my youngest brother.

  Year 6

  Winter

  I enjoyed our family Christmas gatherings once again. I enjoy them a lot more than I used to when the children were smaller. We had to get up so early to chore, come to the house, get the children up and dressed in their Sunday best, and make it out the door in time to get to my cousin’s house when the rest did. Not to mention the food that had to be fixed. We’d come home with tired, dirty children who didn’t feel very good from all the sweets they ate and juice they drank. Mom was no better off, and I didn’t feel like heading to the barn to do the milking again. Once I did get done with the chores, I felt a lot better.

  Now I need to go walk at least two miles. I’ve also learned to leave certain foods alone and not drink any juice. That way I don’t feel so bad. The children are now old enough to dress themselves, I don’t have to remind them to brush their teeth, but I do still help the girls with their hair. And they do need to be repeatedly reminded to hurry out of the bathroom. One small bathroom with eight people, but we get by.