My Life as An Amish Wife

by Lena Yoder

  You see, this newcomer is another puppy. A puppy in the house! I am still not completely accepting, but I am completely outnumbered, so I might as well make the most of it.

  My agreement was the fact of responsibilities. Who will volunteer to clean up his messes if he has an accident in the house? Who wants to take him outside at 3:30 in the morning because he has to go? Who is going to train him to start with? I heard choruses of “I will,” but for some reason with mom home all day, where does the responsibility lie? And if he does have an accident in the house when the children are at home, they still yell, “Mom!”

  For the first time in 19 years I was enjoying my forenoons of freedom. Now I am back to potty training. My family says I will fall for him yet. They probably know what they are talking about, but I am going to pout about it for a while anyway. We named him Cody, and he does seem to be doing well. He is just a wee little thing—a teacup terrier of some kind.

  We do not have Jacob any longer. That was a sad day indeed, but for several reasons we had to get rid of him. We miss him and his being totally loyal to us. He was a one-of-a-kind dog, but only a dog. One chapter closes in our lives and another one opens. Such is life.

  Forty-five minutes ago the schoolchildren came home, and, whoosh!, they are outside again. Before they went outside, they put their lunch pails away, changed clothes, snacked on watermelons and peaches, put the laundry away, and washed the dishes. Now they were headed to the barn.

  They are totally impressed with their dad these days. Besides getting little Cody, he also came home with their very first pony, a two-seated pony wagon, and a harness. The harness and wagon were used, but they couldn’t care less.

  Emily said the pony, which they named Tony, is exactly as she always dreamed her pony would be. The children could hardly believe their good fortune. They truly appreciate this new venture and take total responsibility of the small horse.

  Late fall is not one of my favorite times of the year, but there are things I do enjoy about the cold season. Hot soup is one of those things. Tonight Wayne, Brian, and I enjoyed bowls of tummy-warming ham-and-bean soup. Sometimes I make jalapeno-cheese cornbread muffins to eat with soup, but tonight we just had crackers.

  I made chicken noodles for the four youngest because they think ham-and-beans soup is nasty. As each one came by the kitchen asking what we were having for supper, I had them look into the pot of beans. Once they let their disappointments be known, I pointed to the pot of noodles and watched their frowns turn to smiles.

  Tonight Emily reminded me of a dish called “Hunting Chicken.” Don’t ask me why it is called that, but it’s what my mom always called it. I cook macaroni in a quart of chicken broth and chicken bits and some water. I add salt and some chicken base seasoning. Once the macaroni is almost done, I add some frozen peas. In a cast-iron pan, I sauté chopped onions and bread cubes in butter until nicely toasted. I sprinkle some garlic salt on top for extra flavor. Then I put the macaroni in a serving bowl and top it with the bread crumbs. This is a fast and extremely simple dish that is totally kid friendly. Well, except I always find a small pile of peas beside Colleen’s plate.

  Another thing about winter is having supper at 5:00 and then enjoying a long, cozy evening in the living room with the family… maybe even playing Old Maid with Jesse, reading, or playing other games.

  Flannel sheets on our bed is another thing I have discovered I enjoy about winter. I had a mindset I didn’t need those, but as I age I find my body changing. Now these cozy sheets feel wonderful.

  This winter will go down in history for our community. We had a record amount of snow and cold. We missed many days of school and work. It was a challenge as a mom to keep everybody happy and content. The children spent hours outside in the snow if it wasn’t way below zero degrees. They also spent time bedding down the calves. Wayne and Brian spent a lot of time doing chores, keeping water lines from freezing, and pushing snow—mounds and mounds of snow.

  We always had wet clothes hanging over the coal stove, either freshly laundered or from the snow. What a winter! Now, please come on spring!

  Cody is house-trained now. Thankfully it did not take long at all. He loves to go upstairs and wake the four youngest children in the morning, much to their chagrin. We don’t have a door on the stairway, so sometimes he goes upstairs to wake them long before they think it necessary to greet the morning.

  Jesse usually comes back down with Cody, and they cuddle in the recliner or in front of the coal stove. One morning I heard Jesse tell Cody, “You are my best friend.”

  Karah and I did a huge laundry this morning. I would have loved to hang the mountains of towels outside on the lines and watch them flapping in the breeze, but, alas, it is zero degrees. My boots aren’t high enough to stomp through that cold fluff of snow.

  Enter into our laundry-cluttered kitchen, and you would see Jolisa washing the dishes while Emily tidied and swept the house.

  I fixed an egg sandwich for one, cooked oatmeal for two, and the other two had cereal for breakfast. While one was packing the lunches, the cheap tinfoil tore while she was wrapping pizza pockets. We were in a hurry, or at least I was, but there she stood telling me, “Look, Mom, look!”

  In that time I had dumped a couple of peaches, was cleaning that up, and looked at that cheap tinfoil so we could move on.

  Next, Jesse was checking out something in the freezer compartment of the fridge and somehow we bumped into each other. The egg I had in my hand landed on the floor.

  I’m surprised at myself—how calm I remained. We didn’t have a bad morning considering the size laundry we had to do. The children were ready and waiting on time for their rides to school.

  Year 7

  Winter

  Jolisa went to town with her Aunt Ida. She informed me she has $14 to spend. I asked her what she was going to buy with her $14, to which she started giggling and stated, “Chocolate!” She’s right on being a lady. Who wants to live without chocolate? I am all for healthy eating, rarely eating anything with flour and sugar, but chocolate? Well, let’s just say I have a hard time saying no to that. Actually, it’s even worse than that.

  Big candy bars don’t bother me unless the package reads Dove or Milky Way. I don’t eat more than two or three candy bars a year, but put a bag of Dove chocolates in front of me and you’d better hurry if you want one!

  Karah has accomplished a longtime dream of hers. She has sewn two dresses! She does well for a 13-year-old. I bought more fabric, and now I want to cut those, so she can continue in her venture. I am anxious to have her home from school so we can keep two sewing machines humming. Emily and Jolisa can do many jobs to keep the household humming smoothly. Sounds pretty fantastic, doesn’t it?

  Don’t forget the Equal Rights Movement my daughters are very involved in. It takes a strong mom to keep everyone happy and well adjusted. Sometimes I simply do not have what it takes. I would have no power were it not for my Lord and Master, who provides if I ask. I continue to praise him.

  This past winter I often dealt with frustrations I couldn’t seem to get on top of. I called it stress. “Lord, help me handle this stress.” “Take it, Lord! I can’t handle it anymore.” One day I had a very inspiring conversation with a friend who told me she chooses not to carry any stress. Choices. That’s really what this life consists of. We choose how we deal with things. We have to choose how we deal with situations and then live with the consequences. Not that this was news to me. I simply had to be reminded. I can choose if I will let circumstances get me down or if I will take all circumstances and learn from them. Make the best of them. That is not always easy, and I struggle, but every day I think of the choices I have to make. Do I let stress bog me down or do I give it to the Lord?

  So I just keep on smiling, never complaining that my 18-year-old refrigerator is running at 60 degrees. Yes, I’ve got life down pat. Not a word of frustration is muttered out of my mouth. I lied. I am so human, and every day I need a fresh dose of God�
��s grace because I fail miserably. I also need patience to wait until we are able to get a new refrigerator.

  Today I am feeling so privileged to be living on our humble little farm here in Northern Indiana. It’s muddy and a bunch of things are so patiently waiting for us to repair them, but I just feel so blessed. My life is busy and full yet gentle and quiet, living in the country in a Christian community. Yes, we are so blessed!

  Year 7

  Spring

  After a gorgeous, warm spring day full of hard, physical work, I trudge to the living room with the full intention of settling myself into that comfortable recliner of mine. I put my feet up and bury my nose in a good book for several peaceful moments. Just having relaxed, I hear some earth-shaking screams coming from the girls’ upstairs bedroom. I can hear their feet pounding on the floor, hopping from one bed to the next, and then more screaming. I get weak, imagining some huge, wild animal must have crawled from under their bed or, worse yet, a human predator. They are now screaming, “Mom!”

  I quickly abandon my royal chair. My feet hit the floor, run to the kitchen to get the flyswatter (the only weapon I could think of), and head up the stairs. For some odd reason I figured I could kill a demon with a lowly flyswatter.

  I find Emily swaddled in a blanket and Karah, always the practical one, pointing to a huge bug. “Please get it!” she cries. I suppress my giggles plus a little anger, and quickly shoo the June bug out the window. What a fuss over one little huge bug. I can’t believe my girls.

  School is out! The first day they were at home all day, we decided to go to Glory Gardens, the awesome greenhouse a mile north of here. I biked and the children hitched Tony to the pony wagon. They all helped decide what flowers we wanted, and I appointed certain flower beds for each one to plant and take care of this summer. Jesse picked out flowers for a pot.

  When we got home, Jesse promptly planted his flowers. The rest of us planted ours, coming up a few plants short. The three girls hitched Tony to the wagon again and went to buy what we still needed. We planted the last ones in the rain, well satisfied that the job was complete. I told the girls I’m sad we’re done already because I love going to the greenhouse, planting all we bought, being surrounded by green grass, warm spring breezes, and birds heartily singing their songs.

  I hear a lot of ladies saying their rosebushes did not survive the harsh winter. I’ve been watching mine closely, but I do believe six of the seven will survive. The seventh one was a younger plant, probably not as deeply rooted as the older plants. Colleen gave me a red tea rose for Mother’s Day. Wayne gave me a yellow one… I think just because he loves me.

  We all love roses and usually keep a fresh bouquet on the kitchen table all summer long. We have miniature roses too that make perfect mini bouquets to set by the sink window to cheer our day as we do our daily kitchen duties.

  We always plant annual yellow daisies, annual blue salvias, and annual white alyssum to round out these bouquets.

  Year 7

  Summer

  We have purchased a brand-new EZ Freeze Refrigerator! It is like a genuine Cadillac parked in our kitchen. We’ve never had a bigger fridge then 10 cubic feet; now this one is 15 cubic feet. It looks huge in the kitchen, but I think we will quickly adjust to it. It has a light and a huge freezer compartment. Yes, I love it!

  Wayne looked in the freezer and commented on having this big a refrigerator and we hardly have anything in it. Just let me go to town, and I will quickly remedy that.

  I probably sounded like a brat wanting a new refrigerator so badly, but I am glad we decided to buy new instead of repairing again because they found more things wrong than they had anticipated, and it would have cost us close to the price of a new, bigger one—and we still would have only had the small, old appliance. I felt that way from the beginning of the problems. Sometimes women do have good ideas. Did I deserve this new fridge? Absolutely not. I don’t deserve anything. God is just so good!

  The county bookmobile was here yesterday, and now Jolisa is reading book after book to Jesse. He can read too, but Jolisa just loves reading out loud to him. She decided to join the summer reading program. She shouldn’t have a hard time completing it as much as she enjoys reading. I checked out some cookbooks to browse through. I think I am addicted to cookbooks. Colleen inherited the same weakness.

  On to other things!

  Dawn Dish Soap for Roses

  Dawn dish soap is a staple in our house for more than just washing dishes. I’ve used it several years already to spray aphids on the rosebushes. The roses seem to love it, and it kills the aphids. I mix a half cup Dawn to a gallon of water and spray the plants thoroughly, also getting the underside of the leaves.

  Dawn for an All-Purpose Cleaner

  For an all-purpose cleaner: In a spray bottle, mix 2 cups water, 1½ cups white distilled vinegar, and ¼ cup Dawn dish soap. If the bottle is not full, add more water. That is the only cleaner I buy to use on the tub/shower surround, the kitchen countertops, the sinks (especially the stainless steel sinks because it gives them an awesome shine). The girls think the mixture stinks, but the smell quickly fades. And it is not toxic!

  Summer is marching by in grand fashion, but stepping way too swiftly to please me. Summer is always so fleeting, flittering by like the fireflies the children chase in the warm summer evenings. It seems those moments are way too few. It is so worth sitting around the campfire with our loved ones, relaxing and just being totally ourselves.

  For the first time in my life, I am the owner of a fishing license! Having only fished once before, 20 years ago, I was looking forward to spending a day on the lake. Wayne, Brian, Jesse, and I met Wayne’s brother Merlin and his wife and son one morning on the lake to try our luck. I was already envisioning a fish fry! That’s like counting your eggs before they are hatched. To my amazement, I caught the first fish! Even though it ended up raining, we half froze, and we hardly caught any fish, I really enjoyed the day.

  We also went camping, swimming, fishing, and eating at Wayne’s eldest niece’s place. They live within walking distance of three lakes, where we spent some very relaxing moments enjoying each other’s company. We grilled on the pontoons and watched the bald eagles from our peaceful spot on the water. The children swam; the men and boys tried their luck at fishing.

  Some skunks would have loved to join our circle around the campfire later that night. I think they smelled JoEllen’s grilled bacon-wrapped shrimp. The girls and I thought we were so tired we could hardly move anymore. We were pretty well melted into our camping chairs when Adrian so calmly said, “Daddy, there’s a skunk over there.” We discovered we still had enough energy to move really fast.

  We had borrowed a neighbor’s pontoon, so a couple days later Karah and I went back there with Tony and the pony wagon to get our things. In the course of our chatting with the neighbor family, Dean asked us if we would be interested in a black Lab puppy. Karah and I looked at each other in disbelief. The children had been begging for another Lab dog, faithfully watching the pet ads in the daily paper and hoping to find one we could afford. We quickly informed him we most certainly would! He said they woke up the other morning to four puppies in their front pasture, and he has been unable to locate their owner.

  Dean took us to the puppies. Karah fell to the ground, and those lovable dogs were all over her wanting to play. Typical Labs. These were in super shape; someone had taken good care of them. We gathered ourselves up, went home, and headed to the barn where Wayne was working to ask if we could get one. Within five minutes the four youngest were on the pony wagon again heading to buy a puppy! That was the beginning of our life with Charlie.

  To begin with, Cody did not like Charlie at all. I think he was afraid of him because Charlie was so much bigger. After a few weeks, though, they were best friends; snuggling together to sleep and playing hard all day. Cody has grown a lot this summer, and I am waging war with my family. He will not return to the house this winter. He has Charlie to snuggle w
ith, and he will be okay outside in the mudroom. This time I will not back down. I think they know I am serious, and I think I have Wayne on my side.

  Year 7

  Fall

  I did the laundry this morning while the girls packed their lunches and cleaned up the house. They helped me hang up the laundry on the lines after it was light enough to see. Before they were done, I noticed it was sprinkling and the eastern horizon was very red. Hmm, “red in the morning, sailors take warning.” I remember seeing in the paper on Saturday that it was predicted to rain today.

  We’re having a typical Monday morning. After the four scholars headed out the door, I quickly gave the kitchen a last swipe through and decided I might as well go bring the laundry in and hang it under the porch roof. We’ve done that a lot this cool, rainy fall. My brain has been trying to grasp the fact that winter is on its way. I am rebelling furiously.

  On one of those cool, fall days, Colleen was baptized in our church in the name of the Father, Son, and Holy Spirit, and in front of the witnesses of our church family, some relatives, and friends. It was a small gathering, and so, so special.

  The same day was the sixth anniversary of Mom’s passing, which caused tears because of the closeness my mom and Colleen shared. Mom’s sister Ida and her husband, Lee, and Mom’s brother Ervin and his wife, Clara, came to share in our joy, which meant so much to us. It was like a little bit of Mom was there. Colleen making the decision to be baptized in our church and becoming a member makes motherhood all worth it. Our children are the only things we can take with us to heaven, so we need to keep on keeping on, one day at a time, living for the Lord.