Irreparably Broken

by K J Bell

  After a few silent miles, Brady looks over at me. “Are you hungry?”

  “Starving.” I draw the word out, fold my arms over my belly and lean forward.

  Brady chuckles. “Then you’re in for a treat. There’s a taquería nearby that is to die for.”

  I shouldn’t agree to dinner since I already have a dinner date, but I don’t want our time together to end. Brady is different here. He’s the Brady I’m fond of. The one I’ve had a secret crush on for most of my life.

  The taquería is shabby and badly maintained, but the food smells divine. It’s also a quaint family-run place. An old Spanish woman is in the corner patting out dough, making tortillas. The process is second nature; her fingers move with ease. Kids run about the place, giggling, their parents working behind the counter.

  My first bite of the steak taco is incredible, and my mouth waters just thinking about the second bite. Brady and I eat, and engage in friendly conversation.

  I tell him about my first day at work, leaving out anything to do with Harrison. Brady isn’t my boyfriend, and it shouldn’t matter if I like Harrison. But Brady clearly doesn’t care for Harrison. I saw it in his demeanor at the Bean. I fear if I bring up Harrison, it will ruin our night, and I’m having too much fun with him.

  Our talk for the most part is superficial. There’s a hint of something more between us, an attraction. I slurp my soda and do my best to ignore it. Brady is not boyfriend material, and I remind myself that he only wants us to be friends.

  I absently twirl my hair as my mind recalls watching Brady with those kids and how happy he looked. Where did he get the money to do all of the work there? Brady doesn’t have a job, and as far as I know, he’s never had one. I wonder if he’s involved with something illegal, such as running drugs or gambling. It’s not something I can picture him doing, but then again, after today, there’s so much about Brady I know nothing about. The fact that he doesn’t want his family to know what he’s up to only adds to my suspicion he might be into something not entirely on the up and up. When I glance across the table and look into his eyes, I decide my imagination is just running wild. Brady’s no criminal, although he does have some serious secrets. Secrets I hope at some point he’ll consider sharing.

  When I check the time on my phone, it’s well past seven-thirty, and I still don’t have a signal. My text to Harrison is sitting in the outbox, increasing my guilt as I think about him sitting at the Bean right now, anxiously waiting for me. Hopefully we’ll be back before it’s too late to call him and apologize.

  As though he’s read my mind, Brady stands and starts collecting our trash, tossing it onto a tray. He throws everything away and comes back to the table.

  “All set?” He offers his hand.

  I take his hand, letting him help me from the booth. His touch sends goosebumps up my arms, and I blush. Will there ever me a time when his touch doesn’t affect me? This friend thing is going to be much harder than I thought.

  I expect him to let go of my hand when we start to walk, but he doesn’t, and I don’t stop him. At this moment there is no place I’d rather be and no one I’d rather be with.

  Border traffic is typical, as in dead-still. I pull my phone from the pocket of my shorts, and see my text finally went through to Harrison. I have twenty new texts, some from Harrison, one from my mom, and the others all from Liv. Nosy bee-otch!

  I choose not to read any of them, and glance over at Brady. His eyes are on the road, and he’s quietly lost in thought.

  “How long have you been going there?” I ask, breaking the silence.

  He looks over and smiles warmly. “It’s been about a year. I go to school with Rodrigo’s brother, Raul. He told me about the place. Raul was heading down the next weekend and asked if I wanted to go. When I got there, I saw the kids playing in a field full of rocks and broken glass. I decided to help.” He shrugs.

  “You’re full of surprises, Brady Hunter.”

  “You have no idea, Tor.” He arches a brow at me and drops his hand on my knee.

  Just friends, I remind myself for the millionth time and shyly look at my hands, ignoring the heat in my cheeks. Afraid if I bring attention to it, he’ll remove his hand, which is now lightly stroking my knee, I ignore that, too.

  When Brady stops for gas, I decide it’s a good time to read my text.

  Livinator: 3:14 PM WTF! Wht the hell r u 2 up 2?

  Livinator: 3:16 PM Y was Brady holding ur hand?

  Livinator: 3:18 PM as ur BFFAA, u wil spill. C U L8R…WEG!!!

  Crap – she wicked-evil-grinned me.

  Mom: 4:32 PM Hi Honey. We’re all settled in here. The house is lovely. I miss you so much already. Call me when you have time to chat. I love you. Love, Mom. P.S. Your father says hello.

  Wow! I need to show her how to shorten her text.

  Livinator: 7:20 PM OMG! Hottie Harrison is here. Ur going on a date? U bitch u didn’t tell me! Hurry!!!

  Double crap!

  Livinator: 7:41 PM Where r u? he looks sad :(

  Harrison: 7:48 PM Hey, still comin? C U soon.

  Livinator: 7:53 PM WTF…. U better not flake!

  Livinator: 7:56 PM hello?????

  Harrison: 8:03 PM I guess ur not coming. Call me. Hope ur ok.

  Ugh!

  Livinator: 8:04 PM U suck!

  Livinator: 8:19 PM U better be home when I get there!

  Livinator: 8:24 PM ur not my BFFAA anymore!

  Livinator: 8:25 PM I take it back. Luv u. call me!!!

  Livinator: 8:33 PM WTH!…did u guys elope? LMFAO

  Livinator: 8:35 PM Seriously…if u got hitched w/o me I will kill u!!!

  I laugh out loud.

  Livinator: 8:46 PM Grrrr!!! Where r u?

  Harrison: 8:52 PM Pls call me. Worried, cuz ur w/Brady.

  Huh? Why is he worried I’m with Brady?

  Livinator: 9:05 PM should I call cops? LOL.

  Livinator: 9:12 PM If ur getting laid, I want deets! Ugh, barf. Never mind. Don’t want to know! Yuk, can’t u get laid by someone I’m not rel8td 2? Get ur ASS home!

  The last text came in nearly two hours ago. I’m in for one hell of an interrogation when I get home, and I have no idea what to tell Liv. Brady doesn’t want his family to know anything, but I suck at lying, especially to Liv. I’m not sure how I’m going to face Harrison and it’s too late to call him.

  Just as I tuck my phone back into my pocket, Brady hops in the truck.

  He smiles and puts the key in the ignition. “What’s up?”

  I scrunch up my nose. “What am I supposed to tell Liv?”

  “Don’t tell her anything?” Brady says with a layer of sarcasm in his voice.

  My eyes bug out, and I look at him. He’s obviously lost his mind. “Seriously? Have you met your sister? My phone nearly imploded with all the texts she sent trying to figure out what we were up to.”

  His smirk suggests he knows exactly what a snoop his sister is. He starts the car and shifts into reverse, backing out of the spot and pulling out onto the road. “I told her I was taking you to T.J. to hang out. That’s what you tell her.”

  “Yeah, if only it were that easy. Can I tell her you wanted to apologize for Jake? She might buy that.”

  “Oh, and ruin my bad-boy don’t-give-a-shit-rep.” He laughs. “Yeah, you can tell her that.”

  My phone vibrates, and I pull it out of my pocket, expecting a “where the hell are you?” text from Liv.

  Harrison: 12.11 AM Just got ur text. Glad ur ok. Call me when u get home. I’ll b up.

  At least he doesn’t seem upset. If I had waited around for a date who never showed, I’d be irate.

  I respond.

  Tori: To: Harrison 12:14 AM K sorry :(

  Skipping out on my date with Harrison was horrible, but I wouldn’t change a thing about tonight. Brady pulls a tissue from his pocket and hands it to me. I giggle and take it from him. He’s written thank you on it. I should be irritated he keeps reminding me that he’d sneak
ed a peek at me naked, but I think the tissue notes are sweet. They’re his way of telling me he does care about me – at least, that’s what I want to believe.

  I tip my chin and hold the tissue up. “For what? You already thanked me for coming with you.”

  “Sorry, but I just can’t help reminding you how deadly tissues are.” I playfully slap him on the arm, and he yelps. “Seriously, though. Thank you for everything…for forgiving me…sharing this with me. It means a lot, Tori.”

  “You’re welcome.” I smile. I’m in serious trouble. I might be in love with him. And not just in the “crush” kind of way.

  When we arrive home, it’s almost one in the morning, and Liv is crashed on the couch. Careful not to wake her, Brady and I quietly sneak up the stairs. It appears that he’s trying to avoid her noisy butt, too.

  As he tells me goodnight at my door, I think he might kiss me, and I hold my breath in anticipation. His lips nearly meet mine before he moves his head and kisses my cheek. I sag against the door, disappointment washing over me again. My body’s been experiencing a lot of that lately. Brady smiles politely, thanks me again for going with him, and walks to his room. With my back still against the door, I reach behind me and twist the knob, allowing an extra minute for him to change his mind and come back. He doesn’t.

  I climb into bed without changing my t-shirt, even though it smells like tacos. Liv is a light sleeper and I don’t want to risk making any noise that might wake her up. For the same reason, and also because I’m chicken, I decide to text Harrison. Typing is less stressful than conversation.

  Tori: To: Harrison 12.52 AM Hey, just got home. Can’t call. Don’t want to wake Liv.

  Harrison: 12:54 AM NP. U ok? Brady get u home safe?

  Tori: To: Harrison 12:55 AM Yeah, I’m fine. Y?

  Harrison: 12:56 AM just making sure.

  Tori: To: Harrison 12:57 AM sorry about 2nite.

  Harrison: 12:58 AM No worries. how bout lunch, 2morrow? 12:30. Meet at bean?

  Tori: To: Harrison 1:00 AM Im in. C U then.

  Harrison: 1:01 AM gr8. Cant wait! Good nite, Tor.

  Tori: To: Harrison 1:03 AM Nite.

  I remove Liv’s phone from the charger on the nightstand, and plug mine into it. I read Harrison’s texts again. Why was he worried Brady wouldn’t get me home safely? It’s probably because Brady doesn’t have the best reputation when it comes to women. It’s not a secret. Everyone knows Brady’s a player. I guess Harrison’s concerned that Brady will steal my virtue? Ha! Little does he know I lost it to Jake, and he never gave it back to me.

  The door swings open, and Liv strolls groggily into the room, rubbing her eyes. “What the hell, Tor. I’ve been texting you all night. I can’t believe you flaked on Harrison. You promised.” Her bare feet slap across the floor as she makes her way to my bed.

  “Calm down, chica! I tried to text earlier, but I didn’t have service. I just texted Harrison, and he understands. We’re going out to lunch tomorrow.”

  She shoos me over in the bed and hops in next to me. “Lucky for you! You should have seen him, Tor. He was like a lost puppy.”

  I roll my eyes and nudge her with my elbow. “Don’t be so dramatic.”

  “What the hell happened to you, anyway? And what is up with my brother? If you say ‘nothing,’ I swear I’ll take that picture of you passed out with a giant penis drawn on your face in Sharpie and post in on Instagram.”

  “You wouldn’t!”

  She arches a brow. “Try me!”

  Shit! She’s serious.

  “Ugh…Liv. All we did was go into T.J. and eat tacos.”

  She grabs her phone off the nightstand and starts scrolling through it. “Hmm….where is that pic?”

  “Liv!” I reach across her, trying to grab the phone from her hands. She holds her arm up to stop me. I give up and slink into the bed.

  “Aw…here it is!” She flashes the screen my way so I can see. I should have deleted that damn photo when I had the chance.

  “Liv, don’t you dare. All he wanted to do was apologize for Jake.”

  She pulls her eyes away from the phone and looks at me skeptically. “Brady? Apologize?” She’s biting her lip, mulling it over. “Bullshit!” She starts typing on her phone.

  “No bullshit, Liv.” I nearly fall off the bed trying to pull the phone from her grip again. When I can’t reach it, I fall back onto the bed and sigh. Here we go, time to explain. Time to tell my best friend what a lie my relationship with Jake was. “He also told me Jake was always a cheat. That night, Brady made sure I found out. He didn’t want me to leave P.B. and change my life for some guy that would only break my heart.”

  When Liv sets her phone on the nightstand, I realize she’s finally satisfied with my answer. She falls onto the pillow next to me and hogs all my covers. Whew, bullet dodged. “He knew?”

  I roll on my side and slide my hands under my pillow. “Jeez, Liv. I knew.”

  She rolls to her side now and faces me. The sadness in her eyes makes me want to turn away. I never told her and I should have. “What? How come I didn’t know?”

  “I was in denial, Liv. I hid it from everyone. He was my first love. I never wanted to see him as that kind of guy. Your brother arranging for me to find out was exactly what I needed. You were right before when you said Brady did me a favor. I’d be in L.A. right now, boyfriend-less and without my best friend, or worse, I’d still be with him, pretending everything was wonderful.”

  Her finger taps my nose, and I smile. “That’s pathetic, Tor.”

  I make a pouty face. “I was foolish and blinded by love.”

  “So, you and Brady are good.” she clarifies. I nod confirmation. “Mm-hmm, and what about hottie Harrison?” She rolls the “R”s off her tongue.

  “I told you. We’re having lunch tomorrow. Or actually, later today.”

  “Yay!” she screams, more excited than I am. Maybe she should go out with him. “I’m thrilled you’re going out with him. I really like him.”

  “Obviously…calm down. It’s just lunch. Don’t start planning my walk down the aisle.”

  She laughs, and I practically hear the cogs turning in her head. “Think of how freakin’ cute your kids are gonna be. Oh, my God, with your blue eyes and his dimples. You better get some sleep, girly, or you’re going to have some serious bags for your date. So not attractive.”

  “I love you, Livvy,” I whisper. I steal my covers back and roll away from her. “Now, can you go sleep in your bed? If I have to sleep with you kicking me all night, I’ll have dark circles to go with the bags.”

  She laughs, gets out of my bed, and climbs into hers. I hear her set her alarm clock. “Goodnight, Tori. I love you.”

  “’Night, Livvy, love you too.”

  Thoughts race around in my mind, all centering on the confusing, secretive soul a few doors away. He’s complex, infuriating at times, yet he’s also the most passionate person I’ve ever known, and I’m a little infatuated with him. He’s hiding so much from the family that loves him. Will he ever tell me why? Do I even want to know?

  Brady

  Sleep isn’t coming easy tonight. How I made it through the night without kissing her, I’ll never know. There were plenty of times I wanted to, and it took every bit of my restraint not to. I started to, and just as her innocent eyes found mine, I let my lips fall into the soft warm skin of her cheek. If things were different and I could somehow escape my mother’s grasp without hurting Liv or Tug, I’d make Tori mine.

  When we stood in front of her door, I saw disappointment in her eyes. She wanted my kiss. Kind of strange how we’ve agreed to be friends, and yet the attraction we share is always just below the surface and ready to explode. My intention is to keep things friendly, but I’m not exactly sure that’s possible. Embodying everything I love in a woman, she makes me feel things I never knew I was capable of, and it scares the hell out of me.

  I wish I’d never made that promise to Vanessa. The night she confronted
me remains the worst night of my life. No matter how hard we tried, things never clicked between us romantically. I cared so much for her that I couldn’t end it. We’d been out to dinner when she smiled warmly from across the table and said, “We need to stop fooling each other, Brady.”

  I couldn’t believe she called me on it, and I still struggle with it. She informed me she loved me unequivocally, but it was obvious my heart was with Tori. She knew what I’d done to Tori, and somehow she knew how much I wanted Tori, too.

  She’d made me promise to quit torturing myself and confess my feelings. I told her I was too chickenshit, and she told me to man up. I loved her even more after that conversation, a different kind of love, but love nonetheless.

  Vanessa’s gone now and will never know if I tell Tori or keep my feelings locked away. After all, people break promises all the time, right? What’s the big deal? The big deal is, I didn’t just promise someone, I promised Vanessa, and after how things ended, I owe her this.

  I decide it may take years, but eventually, I’ll get my shit together and tell Tori everything…maybe.

  Chapter 13

  Tori

  Mr. and Mrs. Hunter are milling around the kitchen, getting ready for work.

  Mrs. Hunter greets me first. “Good morning, Tori.”

  “Good morning,” I offer to both of them cheerfully.

  Mrs. Hunter personifies a woman in charge. She’s wearing an expensive grey suit and silk blouse, with black, sharply pointed heels. Even her dark hair pulled back into a bun tightly wrapped behind her head screams "all business." I envy her so much. She’s worked for Gibson Capital, a privately owned holding company with a fabulous reputation, for as long as I can remember. Last year when Mr. Gibson passed away, his fortune and his business were left to an anonymous family member. Walter Gibson’s will stated that should his heir not want to be involved in the day-to-day operations of the firm, then Sheila would be promoted to CEO and President of Gibson Capital. As it turned out, the beneficiary chose not to take over the company, and Sheila was promoted. I remember she was shocked and thrilled when it was announced. As a business major, I admire her drive, and I aspire to someday be as successful as she is.