A Life Unplanned

by Rose von Barnsley

  "How on earth could you make such a stupid assumption?"

  He slouched in the vanity chair across the room. "I told you, there was no excuse for my behavior, and then I fell into the habit of mistreating women."

  "But why did it start in the first place?" I was getting a little frustrated with him.

  "We're all originally from Boston. That's where I grew up, that was where I went to school, and I had a scholarship to go to college there."

  Now I was confused.

  "We had to leave, because of a girl, a few of them, really. I've never had good luck with women. I seem to attract bad ones."

  I tried not to take his words personally.

  "I took advantage of it in college. I hadn't in high school. I wasn't like that. I had one steady girlfriend from eighth grade to eleventh."

  "What happened?"

  "My best friend got her pregnant."

  I gasped, shocked.

  "Yeah, at the time, I didn't know if I should be relieved or pissed, when she confessed the baby wasn't mine. Everything was so messed up after that, and things just seemed to get worse. I had a friend who was a girl. I'd known her since second grade. We weren't really close, but after she heard about what happened, she made her move. I know that's what it was now. It didn't take her long to swoop in and play my rebound. Again, I was stupid and trusting, and I thought she loved me. I was thinking everything was going to be okay, and I was finally getting over my ex-girlfriend. Then I walked in on Mandy, my new girlfriend, trying to take my dad's pants off."

  "WHAT?" I yelled in disbelief.

  "My dad had shoved her away and told her to leave. I had sort of overheard parts of their conversation before I came into the room. He was rebuffing her and scolding her, telling her that her behavior was inappropriate. I walked in and yelled at her, pissed and hurt. I couldn't believe she used me to get to my dad. She'd had a crush on him for years."

  "I'm so sorry, Trent."

  "After her was Sabrina. We couldn't stay in Boston anymore after that. There was too much scandal attached to our family."

  "Who was Sabrina?"

  "She was my biggest mistake." He took a few deep breaths and then looked up at me determined. "Keep in mind that everything she said was a lie, and there were eyewitnesses who proved my innocence."

  "Innocence?"

  He rubbed his face and looked so exhausted. "I went to a house party. I wanted to blow off some steam after things went south with Mandy. My ego had taken a major hit. My first love ran off with my best friend, and my second girlfriend had the hots for my dad, not me. I needed some validation." He paused, as if trying to find the right words. "I wasn't really drunk, and neither was she. I don't think she'd actually had anything to drink besides water that night. Sabrina came on to me strong, and I liked it. I needed it. I let her drag me off into another room and…" he closed his eyes and screwed up his face in displeasure. "Thankfully, she forgot to lock the door, and two different couples tried sneaking into our room, only to find her riding me and yelling at them to shut the door, that the room was taken."

  I didn't understand what the problem was. He said he wasn't drunk, and he had wanted to be with her.

  "A week later, she told me that she was going to tell her parents I raped her if I didn't pay her off. I thought she was fucked in the head and told her no way. I wasn't the first guy she'd been with. Things got bad fast after that. Her parents pressed charges. I was seen as the bad guy. No one believed me at first, but we were finally able to track down the people who’d butted into the room when things were going down. All four of them testified on my behalf, clearing me of the charges, but the damage was done. I lost my scholarship, and some people thought my family had paid the witnesses to lie.

  "My parents moved us to Texas to get away from everyone. They went to Livingston, and I went to Waco to school. I swore off girls at first, but after sitting back and watching enough of my buddies play the field, I decided to do the same. I used women and refused to let anyone close to me.

  "I wanted validation, proof that I was wanted for more than just my family or parents' money. I took what I wanted and gave nothing in return to boost my own self-esteem, and I hurt so many people while doing it, including myself. I was raised better than that, and my behavior weighs heavily on my conscience even now."

  "What made you stop being that way?" I asked.

  "By the time we met, I'd already become a resident. As a resident, they move you to different departments, so you can decide if you'd like to specialize in anything. It's also required, so you have a basic knowledge of things and know when to refer your patient to a specialist. It wasn't long after Tiffany, when I was transferred to the mental health ward." He grimaced and covered his face for a moment. "I think that was my hardest rotation. So many fucked up people came through, and so many were women who'd had mental breakdowns because of fuck-ups like me who'd hurt them. I was also given a little more insight as to why the girls from my high school had acted the way they did. Hell, it was obvious to me even back then that Mandy was fucked in the head and had daddy issues. I know my dad is good looking, but he was twenty-eight years older than her. That's just gross."

  I laughed at his disgusted face.

  "After that, the guilt piled on hard. I knew better, had been raised better, and I couldn't continue with my bad behavior anymore. I never told my parents what I did, but word had gotten back to them on a few different things, even before my move to Livingston. Trevor, my brother, was living in Waco, he knew some of what I was doing and didn't approve. He and my dad sat me down and tried to have a heart-to-heart, but it was too early, my ego was still wounded from the mess in Boston. I didn't think they understood. My brother was happily married, and my dad…even if he’d had nothing to do with Mandy's behavior, I still held it against him at the time.

  "After my stint in the mental ward, I asked for a transfer to St. Luke’s in Livingston and went home to my parents. I couldn't face the girls I’d been with. I didn't want to ever see any of them again. It was like there were too many to avoid. Livingston seemed like a good place to hide, and I knew my parents would forgive me. I've been on my best behavior ever since."

  "Well, until you met me."

  He groaned and climbed back on the bed next to me. "I swear, Clara, I'm not usually like that. I hadn't drunk so much in a couple of years. My body wasn't used to the alcohol, and then the stress of bringing another shit storm down on my family…" he rubbed his face. "I'm sorry I was a jerk that first night in the bar. The second, I really don't have an excuse for myself. I was a little out of it, but I still knew what I was doing. I expected you to slap me, when I made that comment about your tits." He laughed. "You really threw me for a loop. I know why now, sort of. Why don't you tell me the real reason you did what you did that night?"

  It was my turn to feel embarrassed and ashamed. "I already told you, I wanted another baby and didn't want to look like a slut. Ironic, right? I had to act like a slut, so people wouldn't think I was one."

  "But why did you want to have another baby?"

  I rubbed my belly and smiled when Katie kicked. "My reasoning is stupid, now that I look back on it. I didn't really have any interest in dating. I was content in my life with Tyler. My parents didn't push me to have more kids, not really. My mom just made some very valid points. Of course, she was hoping I'd start dating and get married, before I added to my family like she suggested, repetitively. I just didn't see a reason why I should, though, if I could get what I wanted and still have my uncomplicated life with Tyler." I shifted, trying to get more air. The baby had been kicking up in my ribs more.

  "So when you contacted me, it wasn't to tell me about Tyler?" Trent asked sadly.

  "No, you already knew that. I already told you I planned on using you. I guess I was no better than you were back in your college days. I planned to get what I wanted and disappear. I assumed you wouldn't mind. You seemed to enjoy yourself."

  He chuckled. "It'd been a w
hile. I realized on the way to the hotel room I was giving you a breast exam. It was clean, by the way, but you should still do your monthly one."

  "Um, thanks?" I said before laughing at him.

  He smiled. I was glad for the shift in the conversation. I wanted to get away from the heavy topics.

  He sat back against the headboard again and patted the same spot as before next to him. This time, I didn't hesitate to scoot next to him. When he wrapped his arms around me, I knew I'd made the right choice.

  Chapter 11- On Reactions, Good and Bad

  Even with explanations, I was still wary of Trent. His interest in me didn't make sense. I was a conniving woman who had stolen his sperm for her own purpose. I was no better than the girls who had done him wrong before. I had used him, and he didn't deserve that. It was difficult for me to believe he could look past that.

  I had told him the truth the first chance I had. I wasn't going to hide it from him. If he was going to give me crap, then he had to know where I was coming from. I thought for sure it would turn him off from me, and he'd not want to be involved with me and possibly Tyler. I honestly wasn't sure how he'd react, when I'd told him at The Burger Joint that day. I guessed I was hoping he'd storm out angry and never come back. Somehow, it'd had the opposite effect on him. And now, after hearing his history with women, I honestly didn't know why he was still talking to me, let alone cuddling with me. He had to be nuts or have an ulterior motive.

  Needless to say, I had to stay on guard and try and keep my loneliness at bay. He was a very, very attractive man, and his supposed interest in me was tempting. I wouldn't lie…I was horny, and I had a feeling he'd be good for another round. I just wasn't sure it was a good idea to get involved with him like that.

  Kissing him, though…I needed to stop that. For some reason, when I was in his arms, and his lips were on mine, I didn't want it to stop. All reason went out the window, and my body shouted, "Consequences be damned, just do it!" and I wanted to.

  We cuddled on the bed a little more, talking about things he'd like to do with Tyler. He was hoping to go to the zoo and maybe take me with him. "We can wait until you're on leave, and I'm in Waco. Then we can walk around the zoo. It'll help your body get ready for labor." His hand ran down my belly, and little Katie shifted under it.

  "Are you having a good time?" he asked nervously, and I shrugged. "Do you feel comfortable here…welcome?" he asked.

  "Yeah, your mom is nice. The room is lovely. I just…" think she went overboard.

  "I think the baby shower is probably going to be here. So at least you'll get to use the room twice," he said with a grimace.

  I shifted and tried to push the baby down out of my lungs.

  "Clara, would you be open to maybe…visiting more? At least until my transfer comes through? I know it's a lot to ask and so much easier for me to come see you, but you'll be on leave and…and…I'll have to…I'd just really like to see…spend time with…could you please just think about it, maybe coming down again after the baby's born?" he fumbled, and I nodded to appease him.

  "I need to use the bathroom," I said, scooting off the side of the bed. I needed to put some space between us. I was feeling way too agreeable. I headed for the door, so I could use the bathroom and be further away from Trent and the bed.

  "Why don't you use yours?" he asked confused.

  "My what?"

  "Your bathroom." He pointed to what I had thought was the closet door. I waddled in the direction of it, curious. When I opened it, I was blown away. I should have known Maylene would have put me in a fancy master-like suite.

  "It has a nice deep soaking tub. Babies float. You should try it out before you leave, give your hips and back a break," he said, running his hand down my back and cupping my hip. I wanted him to pull me closer to him, and I knew I needed to step away from him. I took a deep breath and nodded.

  "That sounds nice. I'll have to give it a try."

  He kissed the top of my head and paused at the door before he stepped out. "If you need help to get out of the tub, you can call me." He waved his cell phone at me and walked out. I didn't think I'd call him, but having my cell phone so I could maybe call my mother to help pry me out of the tub would be a good idea.

  I started the water to get it warm and then used the bathroom. I set my phone on the floor next to the tub, so I could reach it easily, and then I proceeded to fall in love with the massaging jets. I slipped down in the warm water, and the baby did float up off my hips, it was heavenly. I let the water cool twice and just added more warm water to it. I didn't want to get out. I could breathe and relax. I actually fell asleep for a while.

  When I woke up, it was dark outside, but someone had come in and turned on the light for me and left me a robe. If I hadn't been so relaxed, I would have been embarrassed. I just didn't have it in me to care.

  My stomach growled, and I knew I had to relent and get out of the tub. I sat up and tried to get into a better position, so I could get out. Just like Trent predicted, I was stuck. I needed something to pull on a little, so I could shift more onto my knees, but there wasn't a bar on the wall, like in my little apartment. It was a ground floor one and handicap accessible, where this bathroom was not.

  I sat back and contemplated just staying there, but my stomach growled again, and Katie gave me a good hard kick. She was hungry, too.

  "Alright, alright," I groaned, rubbing my belly. I picked up my phone and saw I barely had one bar. I hoped my mother had better reception wherever she was. I called her, but it went straight to a recorded message, saying she was out of service range. I sank back into the tub and looked at my phone, wondering if I was brave enough to call Maylene. I could ask her to send my mom up. When I opened my phone screen, I saw I had a text.

  Call me when you're ready-Trent

  Dare I call him? I looked at the robe on the counter, and I wondered if he was the one who had brought it in. He had already seen me naked, but of course I hadn't been pregnant at the time.

  I shot off a text to him.

  Did you leave me the robe?

  I had to know if he'd been in here, if he'd seen me naked like this or not.

  Yes, I was worried and wanted to check on you. I left the robe and turned on the light.

  Well, at least he was honest. Was I brave enough to call him in for help? No, I wasn't. I sent a quick text and asked him if he knew where my mom was.

  His answer was instant.

  She and my mother are out shopping again.

  It was official, I was stuck. If I wanted out, it'd have to be him.

  I felt my hair to make sure it wasn't sticking up all over, and then I washed my face. I was hoping I looked alright and finally got up the nerve to text him.

  Can you come help me out?

  He didn't reply, but I heard a knock on the door.

  "Come in."

  Trent poked his head in, smiling. "I told you you'd like the tub. You feeling better?" he asked, walking over to me.

  "Yeah," I shifted, trying to get into a better position, so I could get up withouth looking like a floundering beached whale. In one smooth movement, he had his arm around my back and under my arms and lifted me with ease out of the tub.

  The weight of the baby hung heavy on my body, making me groan.

  "Are you alright?" he asked, sounding worried.

  "Yeah, the baby weight is all back in place, though."

  He gave me a soft smile and wrapped the robe around me. I realized his eyes stayed pretty much focused on my face the whole time he was moving me.

  "Thank you for helping me," I said blushing. My stomach chose that moment to growl loudly.

  "Sounds like it's time to feed the baby. You get dressed, and I'll see what's left in the kitchen."

  "I missed dinner? What time is it? Where's Tyler?"

  "Tyler is with our dads still. They only caught small fish and a frog. Your father said he could keep the frog. So after dinner, they went to the pet store to buy a tank for it.
I don't think they'll be gone too much longer."

  "So we're here alone?" I didn't know why I asked that.

  His eyes darkened, and he stepped closer to me. He brushed a piece of hair behind my ear, while his other hand cupped my hip and pulled me to him. My baby belly bumped into him.

  I knew I should stop him. I was pretty sure that when I put my hands up on his chest, it was to push him away from me. Somehow, though, wires got crossed, and I ended up pulling him closer and kissing him. He deepened it and lifted me, setting me on the counter. My robe fell open, reminding me that I was naked. It was enough to pull me back to reality. I had to stop him. I was pretty sure he was just trying to seduce me, so he could be a part of my son's life. I couldn't let the charming Trent Carrington get the better of me.

  Of course, his hand slid between my thighs, and my judgment went from being clouded to a deep fog of pregnancy hormones. It didn't take long for me to whine out my release, and he left me confused and panting, when he stepped back and closed my robe.

  "Let's get you dressed and fed," he said, helping me off the counter. I tried to discreetly glance at his pants, wondering if he was turned on at all, or if his little display of attraction was just for show. He left the room before I had a chance to tell.

  I dressed for bed, since it was so late. It was nearly eight o'clock, and I hoped my dad would bring Tyler back soon. He knew I liked to keep him on a schedule. Instead of going straight downstairs, I went across the hall to Tyler's room and laid out his clothes then went to the guest bath to ready the bathroom supplies.

  "Clara?" I heard Trent looking for me. I considered not answering. I didn't want to make more of a fool of myself. "There you are. What are you doing?"

  "Just getting things ready for when Tyler comes home. I need to keep him on his schedule. I hope the men make it back soon."

  "I'm sure they will. Why don't you join me in the kitchen for some dinner?"