The Senator's Choice

by Combs, Sasha

  “Pamela, I’ll call Frederick and tell him to meet me at the house. We need to discuss this now. We also need to make a few changes to my travel plans. We’re going to Wilmington tonight to talk to your parents, then we’ll leave for Eureka that following morning. We can tell my parents and Morgan about our marriage and the baby when we arrive. I see no need in telling them anything before we get there. Explaining this over the phone could be to complicated.”

  Pamela felt like her life was suddenly out of her hands; being controlled by William but curiously she didn’t mind it. She felt the weight easing from her shoulders. She wanted to fight...to argue and disagree but she knew that William was right. They couldn’t keep these secrets any longer. The baby and their relationship had to be shared with their families but she wasn’t so sure about Frederick or hastily getting married.

  “William...why can’t Mandy handle the changes to your travel arrangements? Doesn’t she have as much power as Frederick in these matters?”

  “Yes,...but she isn’t my campaign manager and I’m not willing to hide this any longer. We’re getting married Pamela and Frederick will need to handle the spin on this news once it’s made known. I’m sure he’ll want to be in charge of the media finding out. Also, he’ll need to make a few added security adjustments. When you become my wife, we will need to have a security detail added specifically for your protection.”

  William’s demeanor had changed. He was talking in a calm matter of fact way. As she listened to him, Pamela had not considered any of these things when she first arrived in his office. The only reason she hastily came to Washington was because she didn’t want to share her baby news in a text message or over the phone. She felt he deserved to hear about their mishap in person but she had not thought as far ahead like William currently was. Pamela had always dreamed of one day being his wife. They had talked around the subject but no proposals or dates had ever been discussed. They’d been working on how best to tell her mom and dad about their relationship in as delicate a way as possible. Yet, now with a baby on the way, she now knew that the best plan may not be the easiest one to carry out.

  “William, I think I should talk to my parents alone. I’m not sure how my daddy is going to take this news and if he doesn’t take it well, I would rather you not be in the room.”

  A stern look came over his face; his calming presence had shifted into something else. She didn’t dare search out the meaning of this new behavior because as she studied him, Pam knew she wouldn’t be able to dissuade him from his thoughts.

  “Now is not the time for us to be divided, then conquered out of fear. We’re in this together. I knew what I was getting myself in to when I continued to see you privately. Believe me, this is not a day that ranks high on my list.”

  Pam slumped hearing him say this, even though she already knew his feelings on the subject. She wasn’t sure if it was her hormones or the fact that the day they both had dreaded had finally come. William closed the distance that had somehow separated them. He lowered his head to passionately kiss her tenderly on her lips. A budding desire emerged making them both wish they were at his home instead of his senate office. With his staff going in opposite directions and so much still left to do; William didn’t want to waste any time lingering. He needed to contact Fred. He also needed to get home to pack his luggage. The two added days that Frederick had padded his travel plans with would have given him the opportunity to leisurely prepare for his trip. Honestly, William had hoped Pamela could come to see him before he left to go to Montana. Over the year, they rarely went one week without seeing each other. However, the two weeks that he planned to spend with his parents and his daughter would have kept them apart far longer than he would have wanted. Thinking on his changed plans brought a crafty smile to his face. When Pamela looked at him she couldn’t help but wonder why he had reason to smile.

  “Mind letting me in on the joke?”

  He chuckled. “You know...before I agreed to take the trip to Eureka, I was actually not looking forward to my vacation. Don’t get me wrong...I miss Morgan and my parents but I didn’t know how my heart would stand being away from you.”

  Understanding the sly smile on his face, Pamela said...

  “It is kind of ironic that we won’t be separated after all.”

  “I wouldn’t say that it’s ironic. More like fate...that’s what I would say.”

  Looking down towards her flat belly, William couldn’t imagine a little life growing inside of her. He considered her health and the potential turmoil that may occur over the next few days.

  “Are you all right? I mean...is everything okay? I know it’s kind of early but did the doctor say that the pregnancy is without complications?”

  Pamela nodded, then added “I’m fine but it’s really early William. To early to be picking out names or border patterns for a nursery.”

  In a grim tone she said...

  “It’s also to early to be jumping to premature conclusions. William, I’m barely pregnant...just five weeks. Shouldn’t we wait a while? What if we stir up a hornets nest leading to all kinds of trouble and then find out that...”

  Pamela couldn’t bring herself to finish her sentence. The second the doctor returned with the report, telling her that she was pregnant; an overwhelming feeling of shock had floored her. As much as she wanted to deny it, she couldn’t. Once the shock began to wane, a degree of acceptance crept in. She wanted this baby and she wanted the pregnancy to be without complications.

  When she’d stopped short, unable to complete her own sentence, William understood so he finished the sentence for her.

  “If the pregnancy doesn’t turn out the way we want it to...the outcome won’t matter. I love you Pamela and it’s about time that we share that news with the world. I don’t want to hide behind our fears that this relationship is going to end up hurting someone. Of course, I want to tell our families first, then we can leave Frederick to do the rest.”

  Leaning his head down to rest on hers, William’s blue eyes locked with an uncertain gaze that she couldn’t hide. With the charm of a politician and a man in love, his voice oozed with confidence when he finally broke the silence saying...

  “We’ll get through this honey...don’t you worry. You’ll see...it won’t be as bad as you’re imagining it will be. Once they see how much we love each other, no one will question how or why we fell in love.”

  When he felt her body slump, in that moment he knew that Pam had acquiesced. She smiled up at him seeing his love for her in his eyes. Pamela wasn’t as sure as he was when it came to her parents avoiding what she knew would be the obvious argument about their relationship but she didn’t have the strength to debate the issue. When he returned her smile with one of his own, he pulled his cellular from his pocket to contact Frederick.

  As William spoke on the phone, Pamela fixed her makeup. The tears and her fretful crying had not ruined her face, which surprised her. Nonetheless, she sealed her lipstick then returned her mirror to her purse. She wasn’t sure if William would want to continue the subterfuge, which would mean she would be leaving his office alone, then meeting him at the secluded place he’d purchased just for them. For her part, this is what Pamela wanted because she didn’t relish the idea of her dawning public life. As her heart raced due to the coming possibilities, she felt William's hand when he touched her arm, turning her to face him.

  “We’re going to make a quick stop at the house. I need to pack a few things for our trip, then we can fly to Wilmington to talk to your parents. We’ll also need to go to your apartment because you’ll need to pack for our trip to Montana.”

  Pamela nodded as the weight of what they were about to do came crashing down on her. Telling her parents would be bad enough but telling a thirteen year old that soon she would be her stepmother; the enormity of this task caused nervous quivers in her stomach to roll. She barely knew Morgan and she didn’t know how this news would affect the relationship between father and daughter.
After the funeral, Pamela had heard about Morgan’s transition back at school. The young girl had bravely trudged forward, not wanting to disappoint her father, yet Pamela wondered if this new turn of events would be accepted with the same brave face. Especially the news telling her that in nine months, she would become a big sister. Just as she twirled this thought in her head, she remembered something equally troubling.

  “Did you say that your parents will be at the mountain retreat with Morgan?”

  William did recall telling Pamela about his parents joining him but he suspected with so much to mentally process, perhaps she’d forgotten. Then he assumed her memory had lagged due to her being troubled over his parents being told about them getting married and the baby. He’d already seen Pamela distraught and he didn’t want a repeat of that. So, when he answered her, William spoke using a tranquil tone.

  “Yes, Pamela, my parents will be there. After talking to Frederick we discussed the importance of my parents arriving hours before Morgan. If all goes as planned, we’ll arrive the following day.”

  “Did you tell Frederick about us? I mean...the baby and the marriage?”

  William shook his head.

  “No, darling...this kind of news is better received when talking face to face to a person. Frederick didn’t say much because I really didn’t stray to far from our original timetable. I’ll be arriving one day earlier than planned. I’m sure this won’t be a problem for my parents because they’ve been looking forward to this vacation. I asked Frederick to meet me at the house. I’ll tell him about us, while you wait in another room. However...if you want to be with me when I tell him...”

  There was a hint of wanting in his voice. William did want her to stand by his side, while he told Frederick the news but he wouldn’t push her because Frederick could be a hard ass and he wouldn’t have him acting a fool in front of his fiancee.

  “I can wait in the bedroom while you tell him. I’m sure there’s bound to be some expletives I don’t want to hear.”

  “Pammy...don’t worry about Frederick. I pay him. I am the boss. He may not like that I’ve made his job doubly difficult but that’s what he gets paid for. It would be to easy if getting me reelected was a cake walk.”

  Walking over to his desk, William picked up the phone. He called for his driver, then he instructed Pamela that she would walk out with him.

  “Is that a good idea William...being seen with me in public so soon? Don’t you think you should run this by Frederick first....at least give him the opportunity to give you his advise?”

  William thought on this for a second, but Pamela spoke before he had a chance to tell her his feelings on the matter.

  “William...I don’t think that now is the time to be changing things. I’ll take a cab to your house...like I’ve done in the past. I’m sure there must be one or two things that need to be done before you meet me at the house.”

  Pamela was reaching for her coat, when William came around his desk to stop her.

  “Pam...I don’t want you riding off in a cab alone without me.”

  “It isn’t as if I haven’t done this before. Besides...there is always someone waiting to get a comment from you or your advise. There’s always a reporter and most times that reporter has a photographer or a cameraman by his side.”

  Pamela could see that William wasn’t buying this so she added more reasoning. In her mind, she didn’t want to ruin his chances to be reelected due to him trying to be gallant.

  “William...I don’t know if I’m ready to be called ‘that girl’ by reporters and photographers because they don’t know my name. I also don’t think it would sound any better if it’s reported that an unidentified woman was seen leaving Senator Hudson’s office, days before he left Washington to go on his vacation. Giving people reason to wag their tongues is never a good idea and I’m quite certain Frederick would agree with me on this.”

  William hated that she was right but she’d forced him to grasp the truth. Washington was a maze filled with pitfalls and countless traps. He’d been wise, and avoided most but this one was a doozy. He didn’t know what Frederick would say about his relationship to Pamela and he didn’t know how they would deal with him remarrying and having another child but he did comprehend the magnitude of questions that would emerge if this news wasn’t handled in a delicate way. Putting the cart before the horse could sink the ship before it left the dock...or something like that. In other words, it would be foolish and a bad idea for him to act unwisely. Especially after skillfully hiding their relationship so well for nearly an entire year.

  As much as he wanted her to remain by his side, William couldn’t have this scenario play out the way that he wanted it to. He inhaled deeply, knowing that he’d been beaten.

  “All right. Go now...but be careful. I’ll leave right after you because I don’t want Frederick arriving before I get there.”

  “Does he have a key to your house?”

  “No...but you do and I don’t want him seeing you go in without having the opportunity to break our news to him first.”

  Pamela nodded. She didn’t know if Fred was already in route to his home, then she wondered at what point in his relationship did William tell his campaign manager about their secluded place. Pamela thought, she would have to ask William about that later. She lifted on tiptoes to kiss him, then left his office before he wouldn’t let her go. When the door was closed, and William was alone, he looked at his watch and noticed that not much time had passed since walking into his office. He wanted to call Morgan to let her know that he would be joining her with his parents for their vacation. When he last spoke to her, William had not concretely agreed to join them. He didn’t know if he wanted to be away from Pamela, especially since they’d been trying to figure out a way to tell everyone about their relationship.

  With more than twenty years separating them in age, he cringed at the words he knew others would use to describe their romance. All the same, the moment he knew that his love wasn’t fleeting; William had given up trying to talk himself out of their relationship.

  It only took a few minutes for him to pack up his office, then he was out the door, walking through the senate hallways. After waving off a few reporters, and commenting to some, William skillfully made his way out of the building to his waiting limo. He and Morgan had been in sync after Bianca’s death which is the reason he wasn’t surprised when he lifted his vibrating phone from his pocket, and noted that it was his daughter calling him.

  As he approached the car, William placed the phone to his ear to answer his daughters call.

  “Hi pumpkin...what’s up?”

  “Hey daddy...I’m being driven to the airport by the driver that Frederick sent for me. Is it true? You’re really going to join me, poppy and nanny in Eureka?”

  He smiled hearing her say the names his parents insisted their granddaughter call them. He wondered if their love would extend to the child quietly growing in Pamela’s womb.

  When he reached the limo, the door was being held open by his driver, standing at the curb. William slid across the seat while shifting the phone to his other ear. Attempting to hear over the noise in the street had made continuing his conversation with Morgan difficult. Once the door to the back of the long car had been closed, William relaxed into a casual conversation. As relaxed as this conversation could be, given that his daughter didn’t know about him and Pamela.

  “Yes, it’s true...I’m joining you, poppy and nanny. You sound surprised. You know how much I love spending time at Barn Wood Hudson. It’s one of my favorite properties.”

  Morgan laughed, while thinking about all the recitals her father had either arrived late or missed all together. He was a champion in that department but she couldn’t fault him for this shortcoming because he never made promises to avoid breaking them. Of course Barn Wood Hudson was his favorite house but that didn’t guarantee that he would join them. She had to hear the words coming from his mouth; that would be her confirmation.


  “Daddy...of course I’m surprised, why wouldn’t I be. But poppy said if anyone could get you out of your senate office, it would be Frederick and it would appear that poppy was right.”

  This was the second time in one day that William had heard this and he was beginning to see the logic in this assumption. William could hear in her voice the smug smile that he knew was plastered on her sweet face. He recalled after Bianca’s funeral, how he longed to see that smile again. As his daughter giggled and talked, William wondered what he’d been thinking of all this time. Why had he waited so long to resolve this issue? It was crazy hiding his relationship especially when he’d concluded weeks ago that he and Pamela would soon be married. Now, the only glitch was the baby. He was happy about the pregnancy but he didn’t want anyone coming to the wrong conclusions. He had planned to marry Pamela because he loved her. Not because of the unplanned pregnancy or to maintain his good standing in the community.

  “Pumpkin...” He said, attempting to force bad thoughts from his mind. He wanted to focus on the conversation they were having. He didn’t want Morgan to become suspicious of his behavior.

  “Yes, daddy...” She said in between one of her breathless sentences.

  “Daddy has a few calls to make before I arrive at the house. I’ll talk to you once I’ve boarded the plane to let you know when I’ll be arriving. And Morgan...”

  William felt a tightness in his throat. He knew now was the time to say this because there would be enough surprises revealed in a few days.

  “Yes, daddy?”

  “I’m bringing a guest with me to Barn Wood Hudson. Pamela...you remember her don’t you? Michael and LaShawn’s daughter.”

  Due to their age difference, Pamela and Morgan knew very little about the other. Morgan was a young child while Pamela was away at boarding school. When it was Morgan’s turn to attend St. Margaret, the boarding school that Bianca had attended, Pamela had already been in college. They were separated by ten years, different interest and a generation gap that only made them aware that the other existed. After the funeral, Morgan left their home to spend time with her grandparents before returning to school. While William and Pamela had been spending all their time together, Morgan had been silently grieving with her grandparents and her boarding school family. Neither father nor daughter talked about how their hearts healed after they went their separate ways.