A Beautiful Melody

by Lilliana Anderson

  I just can’t explain to you how awesome this is. Naomi and I keep singing our hearts out, the band is playing perfectly together. We haven’t had one missed note, one beat out of place. It’s all been amazing and it’s going to be over too soon.

  “Would you like to meet the band?” I say into the microphone, just before we move on to our last song. The crowd screams excitedly in response. Euphoria washes through me as the din rises. I even have to hold my hands up to get them to calm down. “I’ll take that as a yes,” I laugh. I’m in my element here. This is where I belong. It’s where I was born to be – up on stage bearing my soul through music. Nothing compares.

  Disconnecting my microphone from the stand, I start to walk around the stage, introducing us all one by one. The crowd shrieks for each member. But they fucking love Naomi.

  “She’s great right?” I comment, as I’m standing next to her. She is looking absolutely amazing tonight in this tight black miniskirt, purple high heels and this sparkly singlet top that drapes loosely from her body. Her hair is piled up high on her head and she has one of those long sparkly earrings that kind of looks like a chandelier hanging out of her left ear, but in her right is a small diamond stud. When I asked her about it before, she told me it was so the left one didn’t get caught in her bow or get in the way of the violin while she played. Whatever – the look works. She’s smoking hot.

  She glances at me, her eyes shining with delight as the crowd screams their agreement. I can tell she is on as much of a high from this as I am. As the roar of the crowd dies down, an idea hits me.

  “How about we change things up a little?” I ask, knowing that my band mates may not be happy with this, but I want to give the crowd what they seem to want – more Naomi. “Who’s a fan of Aiden Price?” I ask. The crowd screams, and I look around toward Theo, noting the stormy look on his face but trying to give him a look that says trust me, I know what I’m doing. “Yes me too,” I agree. “He’s also one of Naomi’s favourite artists. So I know she’s going to know this song. We’re going to do a cover of I Recall.”

  She continues to smile as she leans toward me and hisses in my ear, “What the hell are you doing?”

  “Trust me. They’ll love it,” I say in hers.

  I move back over to my position, avoiding any eye contact with the other members of the band, especially Theo who’s probably going to lose his shit at me after this.

  The first part is just my guitar and Naomi singing, so they will have time to get over their annoyance before they have to play.

  The crowd quiets as I play the first notes and Naomi starts to sing.

  I recall perfectly

  The day I met you

  Your eyes piercing blue

  All thought left me

  I recall perfectly

  Your hair stood on end

  As you spoke with your friend

  And I stopped moving

  She closes her eyes, her violin held down at her side as she loses herself in the words. The audience is perfectly quiet. They’re loving it. I know they are.

  Come to me tonight

  Come to me

  You’re everything I could want

  Come to me tonight

  Come to me

  Nothing will keep me from you, you, you…

  She lowers her voice to say the last line practically whisper it into the microphone ‘except you my love’.

  The pitch of the song changes as the music speeds up and becomes more intense as my part to sing comes up. As I sing, I’m building towards the chorus hoping to God that everyone else in the band comes in and plays it with me.

  Gather around

  Listen to my sound

  As I lose my mind night after night

  You, scream out your love

  And take part of me

  I strum at my guitar as I play the break between the verses. It’s an angry sound, completely at odds of the melodic picking that accompanies Naomi’s vocals. The music feels like it’s taking over me as I lean back to the microphone and sing a type of moan to lead into the next verse.

  Gather and cry

  What I sing is a lie

  It sounds like the truth

  I speak love, you need proof

  Perhaps you’ll forgive me

  But I hate, who I am, who I am

  Thankfully, the band doesn’t let me down. Relief washes over me the moment I hear Theo come in on the drums at the exact same time as Naomi starts playing on her violin.

  I want to recall, the words you whisper to me.

  Recall, the way your eyes see right through me

  I want to recall, who you are

  I want to remember

  I want to recall, the words you whisper to me.

  Recall, the way your eyes see right through me

  I want to be, what you want

  But I’m not who you want

  There’s a long musical climax to the song, as our instruments meld in a cacophony that seems to tell a tale of woe and confusion. I harmonise my voice with the music the same way the original song does, by singing loud ‘La’s and ‘No’s along with the clamour that rises and peters out slowly, ending with Lachlan playing on his bass on his own.

  Everything is quiet, but for the sound of that bass, his fingers plucking out those notes, the sound filling the stadium, like the buzzing of an uncontrolled emotion. The moment he stops, I suck in my breath - the crowd roars. I race over to Naomi, and grab the hand she’s holding the bow in and hold it up over her head, causing them to roar even louder.

  As we look at each other grinning, the excitement of the night takes over me, and I grab hold of her face, and capture her mouth with mine. Somehow, the crowd finds a way to become even louder, and they spurn me on as I drive my tongue into her mouth and work it against hers.

  Even over the noise, I can feel the vibration from her body as she hums into my mouth. I’ve wanted to kiss her for as long as I’ve known her, but I’ve never felt it was the right time. I’ve never really had the guts to cross that line with her. But tonight, everything seems perfect, and I just can’t help myself.

  When I release her, I smile again, dropping a kiss on the top of her head before walking quickly over to my mic.

  “Thank you,” I call over their screams. “That’s us finished for tonight. But the people you came to see, Radio Silence, will be out here in just a few moments.”

  We all head off the stage to the tune of the crowd cheering for us and make our way through the people congratulating us on a great show until we make it to our dressing room.

  The second we’re in there, Theo turns on me. “What the fuck was that?!” he roars, shoving me in the chest with both hands.

  “Genius,” I say, moving my weight toward him. “You could see how much they loved her out there. I was just giving them what they wanted. They went nuts after every song Naomi sang and played in. They loved It’s a Crime, and they loved Fragile. We’re good on our own mate, but she makes us brilliant.”

  “Just pray we don’t get in shit for playing someone else’s song in our show,” he growls, giving me a second shove for good measure. “And you didn’t need to kiss her like that,” he adds, giving me a third shove, before stalking across the room and twisting the cap off the beer and taking a long chug.

  “Why?” I shrug. “What was so wrong with it?”

  “I don’t really think you should have done that either Marcus,” Naomi adds. “Not in front of everyone like that.”

  I think I hide it fairly well, but I feel like I just got punched in the gut. I mean, didn’t she tell me she wanted me to stop screwing around? Didn’t she say ‘the word’? Now I’m confused, but I don’t regret it – not one little bit.

  “Yeah, ok. I’m sorry Naomi,” I concede, I guess I should have done that in private. “I got caught up in the moment. But you have to admit that they loved it. So, I can’t regret kissing you to the sound of a thousand of people cheering us on. Call me a jackass, but that w
as fucking awesome.”

  Naomi

  My face still feels flushed from the excitement of playing tonight, and the fact that Marcus just kissed me. After all these years, he kissed me, and he did it on stage in front of thousands of people. If that isn’t some kind of declaration, then I don’t know what is.

  Holy shit. I think Marcus likes me. I mean, I think he likes me likes me. Maybe when he told me to say the word and he’d stop, he really did mean it. Maybe he can shift his focus to me? Maybe he can be with just one woman?

  Despite my own happiness over it all, it doesn’t seem to be sitting too well with Theo. After all, Marcus did just publicly break the one rule that Theo refused to break in private last night. But you know what? That’s his loss. His choice. And Marcus is right – the crowd loved it.

  I glance over at Theo, who’s sitting up against the wall, looking anywhere in the room but at one of us, and my bravado dies down. I’m kidding myself. I’d have gladly had him be the one to kiss me tonight – in public or private. What does that say about me though? That I want the attentions of both brothers. I mean, what kind of girl does that make me? I look between both brothers and my mind becomes a jumble of emotions and feelings that I really can’t deal with right now.

  It’s at that moment that Marcus reaches out to take my hand, a look of concern on his face as he studies mine. But with my inner turmoil going on, I flinch away. “Just… not right now. Ok?” I say, taking a step away from him. I need to get my own thoughts straight.

  I see the concern fall from his face as his brow creases into a frown. Suddenly, the elation from tonight’s performance seems to be sucked out of the room and poor Lachlan and Jack are just huddled up together in the corner, pretending none of this is going on.

  Theo finishes his beer and stands up, pointing an accusing finger at Marcus. “God help us if we get in trouble for this Marcus. I cannot believe how reckless you were out there. I mean, what would have happened if the rest of us didn’t know the song?” he shouts. Continuing on, to list all the reasons he can see why Marcus fucked up tonight.

  As I watch them both arguing, I wish that I could somehow melt them into one person. They each have different qualities about them that I like. Theo with his quiet words, his determination and his protectiveness, and Marcus, with his fearlessness and fun loving spirit. They are both special in their own way.

  Although, perhaps I’m just a silly girl whose head is stuck in the clouds, still looking for love in all the wrong places.

  “How about you both cool it. You’re going to fuck this up for the lot of us!” Jack yells over the top of them.

  “Yeah, we just had this awesome show, the crowd loved us and you’re in here fighting over a girl,” adds Lachlan.

  Guilt washes over me, and I take that as my cue to slip out of the room. I need to get away from the Bailey brothers for a while. They’re starting to mess with my head, and that’s starting to cause problems for the band. If I don’t take a step away, this is all going to blow up in our faces, and everything could be ruined.

  As I close the door, I turn to see Radio Silence leaving their dressing room as they head toward the stage. I wait where I am, watching them ahead of me with the plan to go to the side of the stage and listen to them with some other crew members and hang abouts.

  Dan Stolle is the last one out the door, and he looks back down the hall and spots me. “Hey,” he calls out, smiling. He inclines his head, gesturing for me to come to him. Not seeing any reason not to, I oblige. “We heard you playing. The crowd loved you tonight,” he says, walking beside me to where he’s about to walk onto the stage.

  “Thanks,” I say, giving him a small smile.

  He frowns slightly, the ring in his eyebrow bobbing with the movement. “Didn’t you have fun?”

  “Yeah, I did,” I tell him quickly. “Just some band issues. The boys are kind of having at each other’s throats right now.”

  “Wow, a bit of a downer,” he says, glancing over his shoulder as the crowd starts to chant his name. “Listen, why don’t you wait here and enjoy the show. Take your mind off things – I hope you’re a fan.”

  “Of course I am,” I laugh, giving him a small wave as I watch him run out onto the stage.

  He picks up his guitar and slings it over his shoulder, leaning into the microphone. “How’d we like that Matiari huh?! I can’t believe how talented some of you Australians are,” he yells out, turning his head for a moment to wink at me.

  I smile and lean up against a pillar, and watch as Radio Silence starts to do their thing. If someone had have told me that I’d be standing this close to such a huge band a few months ago while I was still tending bar – I would have laughed my arse off at them and called them a liar.

  But here I am, an intrinsic member of a band on the cusp of success. All I have to do is keep my relationships with the Bailey brothers as platonic as possible, and what better way to do that than to spend some time with a rock star?

  Laughing at myself, I can’t believe that thought just crossed my mind. Actually, what’s bigger, is that I can’t believe that even seems like a possibility. I cross my arms over my chest and surreptitiously gave myself a little pinch – just to be sure I’m not dreaming. My grin broadens. I’m still here. This is my reality.

  I shake my head, still finding it hard to believe it’s true.

  ***

  When the show is over, the band comes off the stage to the roar of the crowd. Being the main act, I know they’re planning on going out for an encore, so I try to move out of their way as helpers move towards them, hand them towels to wipe off their sweaty faces and bottles of water to cool down.

  “Having fun?” Dan Stolle asks me. I can’t stop thinking of him as ‘Dan Stolle’, just saying ‘Dan’ sounds so wrong. I’m having trouble seeing him as an actual person at the moment, even though I know he is.

  Unable to find anything witty to say, I simply nod my response.

  “Great. One more song, then we can go have some fun. Yeah?”

  “Yeah,” I agree, completely forgetting about the Bailey brothers and their mixed signals for the moment, preferring to focus on the fact that Dan Stolle seems to want to spend time with me.

  I watch as Radio Silence runs back on stage, the crowd is so loud that I can hardly hear the intro to their song. They’re playing the first song that got them noticed. It’s called Vagabond and is about the singer feeling he isn’t good enough for the company of the woman he’s interested in. I have to admit that it’s my absolute favourite of theirs, and I’ve found myself playing it for fun on more than one occasion.

  When they’re done, the crowd screams again. Never feeling fully satisfied, always wanting more. But the show is over, and the men all leave stage and hand their instruments over to their stage hands. Immediately, Dan Stolle pulls off his white, sweat soaked, t-shirt and replaces it with another one exactly like it.

  I’ll admit that my eyes might have somehow strayed from the very interesting rigging I was trying to stare at and found their way to his abs. Not too bad, I think, pulling my lip in between my teeth then looking away quickly when he catches me looking.

  “Come on,” he says, holding out his hand to me. “It’s time for the second act.”

  For a moment I wonder what he’s talking about, then I realise as we’re stopped constantly by those wanting autographs, photos, and to congratulate them on playing so well. I try to stand off to the side when they are getting their photos taken, feeling like I’m intruding. But he holds fast to my hand, keeping me at his side.

  “This is good exposure for you. Don’t pass it up,” he says in my ear. Photos are being snapped left right and centre, so I just stay where I am and smile, hoping I don’t look too freaked out by all of this attention.

  Radio Silence has five band members. Two guitarists, one bass player and a drummer. The members haven’t changed since they became famous over ten years ago now, so they’re professional and courteous, taking all of t
he attention, that’s making my own head spin, in their stride as we’re led by who I’m assuming is their manager, to a big room that has been set up with food and drinks, and a whole bunch of people who are all waiting on them to arrive.

  The moment we step inside, a flock of admirers gather, asking each member for their autograph. I take the opportunity to look around the room and notice that Jack and Lachlan are sitting and entertaining a couple of busty blondes on a set of couches. Figuring that Marcus and Theo are in here too, I look for them, hoping to find them together and at least looking like they’re going to come over and say hi to the band that’s responsible for us being here.

  I find Marcus on his way towards us, although my heart sinks slightly when I notice that he’s accompanied by two model-like women, one on either side of him. My eyes roll all by themselves and I’m catapulted right back to that morning when I thought I had slept with him and he started to give me the ‘friends speech’. I guess he was talking about something else when he told me to give him the word and he’d stop. I thought he meant that he’d stop screwing around.

  Feeling my stomach turn sour, I reach up and wipe at my mouth, wishing I’d never let him kiss me. God, I’m such a fucking loser. Just look at me right now. I’m running from man to man, hoping that one of them will want me. Who does that? The realisation of my behaviour hits me hard and I realise that for the sake of the band, I really need to get control of my feelings and learn to keep my distance from these men.

  When Dan reaches back and takes my hand again, I happily take hold of his in return, preferring to focus my energies on him tonight instead of the disappointment I’m feeling toward Marcus right now. I tell myself that there’s nothing wrong with that. Spending time with Dan Stolle won’t break up my band. Letting myself get too involved with either Marcus or Theo would. If that makes me a slut, then so be it. I’ve been branded one since that stupid party all those years ago. What difference does it make now?