At Home In Corbin's Bend

by Maggie Ryan

  And then there was Hazel. The intensity of her love for that tiny little girl literally took her breath away, and the reality of how close they had come to losing her was always there at the forefront of her mind. Still, she knew her obsession with her tiny daughter was getting to a point where it bordered on unhealthy. Surely, she could manage to put her down long enough for a five minute shower and thirty minutes of housework. Once again, she vowed to do better tomorrow. After all, even though she cherished every minute spent with her precious baby, she truly hated the person she was becoming. She literally did not recognize herself, but most days she couldn’t put one foot in front of the other and focus long enough to do anything about it. So much had changed, and trying to find a new normal was frightening and overwhelming. At least, she thought with a nod, Beau had given her a plan of action. A plan seemed to be half the battle these days. Tomorrow, she vowed, as she changed Hazel into her pajamas for the night, was a new day, and she would put Beau’s plan into action.

  She felt better already, and she hummed as she rocked her daughter to sleep, feeling inspired with the promise of a new beginning and a new sense of normal.

  Chapter 3

  Her day had started off okay. Managing to awaken before Beau, she had time to shower and dress before Hazel had gotten up. After a small breakfast of coffee and toast while holding Hazel on her lap, she felt great, and more like herself than she had in months. Beau had joined her at the breakfast table, and that’s when things had begun to go wrong.

  “Wow, honey, you look great, and you’ve already accomplished half of what I asked of you today! Good job!”

  Beau was being kind and encouraging, but for some reason his encouraging words made her angry and combative. She glared at him from behind her coffee mug. “Don’t patronize me. I said I would do your precious list, and I will. I don’t need a running commentary as I do each thing. I may be doing less than usual lately, but that doesn’t mean I’m incompetent or need to be treated like a child and praised for each little accomplishment. Fuck!”

  She knew as soon as the four letter word left her lips that she had taken her rant too far. Beau had been totally shocked and ready to apologize a second ago, but now his eyes narrowed, and he pursed his lips in disapproval. It was a look she knew all too well, and it usually meant there would be hell to pay. They didn’t have many rules beyond her temper, and control issues, but cursing was one of them, and cursing at somebody, especially him, was never tolerated.

  Her heart quickened, and her bottom tingled, but then she remembered. They were on a break, and for all intents and purposes she had withdrawn consent. No matter how much he wanted to spank her over it, he couldn’t and she knew he wouldn’t.

  Judging by the look on Beau’s face, he had just remembered the same thing. Ginger smiled, gearing up for her parting shot.

  Beau got there first, and with a lot more class, she had to admit. He stood up, grabbed his briefcase, kissed both her and Hazel, and walked out the door, with a hasty, ”Have a good day!” tossed over his shoulder on his way out.

  Ginger was left stewing in his absence. She didn’t know why she was so upset. Beau hadn’t said anything mean, hadn’t taken the bait, and hadn’t even threatened to spank her. And really, she hadn’t even figured out a good comeback yet, so it’s not like she had missed out on some really great scathing comment.

  Still, his lack of reaction troubled her. Which, she knew, was insanely stupid. Unlike her, Beau wasn’t a reactive person. No matter how many pot-shots she took at him when she was angry, he very rarely countered. Last night had been a rare occurrence. So why did his lack of reaction leave her feeling cold and empty?

  He just breezed out of there without so much as a warning, or a remark about her being lucky, or anything. That was what bothered her. It was almost as if he no longer cared.

  The thought took her breath away. That’s what she had been feeling, that fear she hadn’t been able to put her finger on. It wasn’t always there, and it was fleeting when it was, but this morning had been a perfect example.

  She started to examine it, when it had started, how often it happened, when it happened, and most of all, why, but her musings were cut short by the hungry and impatient cries of her daughter.

  Smiling, she carried her to the big easy chair in the living room and got ready to feed her daughter, smiling as the infant latched on greedily to her breast. The simple and natural act instantly calmed her worries, and she was completely at peace doing what she now did best. Fine, she told herself. It’s okay if he doesn’t care. If he doesn’t care what I do, then I don’t have to either.

  Beau was seething as he walked to his car. He couldn’t believe Ginger had spoken to him that way in the first place, but to top it off by cursing at him would be the straw that broke the camel’s back. He hated this helpless feeling he had, of not having control in his own home. It was a foreign concept to him, and the look he was getting at their life without domestic discipline was sobering. They had always had it, from the beginning, and he wasn’t sure their relationship was strong enough without it.

  The thoughts he was having were causing him physical pain, as if a vise had settled in his chest and squeezed his heart tighter with each sentence.

  He didn’t drive away at first, just sat in his car, staring blankly at the house. He pictured Ginger inside laughing at him, giddy with freedom, and all that she was getting away with. He fought the urge to march back in there and bend her right over the kitchen table for a nice solid reminder about who was who, and how things worked.

  Just thinking about spanking her had him as hard as a rock, and there was no time to seek relief in any form. He had to get to work. As he made the short trek to the middle school, he willed himself to think of mundane topics. Baseball stats, report card season, a grocery list, anything but his naughty wife at home.

  It worked enough to allow him to walk into the school without a tent in the front of his pants, but only barely, and it was taking all of his concentration to do so. He was so wrapped up in his thoughts that he ran smack into Dr. Devon, who was walking into the school beside his son, Michael, who was carrying some sort of giant diorama.

  “Oh, my goodness, Marcus, I am so sorry. I was not watching where I was going. My mind is all over the place this morning. It’s been one of those days,” he confessed with a rueful smile, trying to edge past them into his office.

  Marcus, who was nothing if not intuitive, furrowed his brow and stepped in front of him, blocking his path. “Please forgive my nosiness, Beau, but is everything okay? I’ve been meaning to call and check in on Ginger, and Hazel, but,” he said with a sigh, “you know how life goes. Anyway,” he continued. “How is everybody doing? Are things calmed down and getting back to normal yet?”

  Beau sighed. “More or less. Listen Marcus, not to cut you off or anything, but the bell’s about to ring, and I’ve really got to get to work.” He had figured out by now that he should have taken more of his friend’s advice regarding their roles in the relationship, and he didn’t really want to admit how quickly things were unraveling.

  Marcus looked suspicious, but he let him pass. “Okay, Beau. Have a great day, man. We’ll see you soon, I’m sure.”

  Beau just nodded in agreement, and closed the door to his office behind him.

  Sinking down into his oversized leather desk chair, he rubbed his hands over his face and sighed. He should have taken the doctor’s advice in the first place, and he shouldn’t be blowing him off now. He knew that, just like he knew this situation was getting out of hand. He needed to get some advice, and as a doctor, Marcus was probably a good place to start. He should have been up-front with his friend. Then maybe he would be one step closer to getting this resolved.

  The bell sounded then, and Beau got up from his chair, going out into the hallway to greet the students.

  Ginger cooed at Hazel as she carried her from room to room, putting away laundry from the load Beau had done the night before. During
her earlier fuming session, she had told herself she wasn’t going to do what he asked, or at least not all of it, but once she got going, productivity felt so good. She had dragged out the baby wrap from the top of the closet, and carted Hazel from room to room with her. This way, she could get stuff done, and still have her eye on Hazel at all times. “I really don’t know why we didn’t think of this sooner, baby girl,” she cooed. “This is great! Still, we really want to keep Daddy on his toes, so we’ll just do some of it, not all of it. Cause, we’re still mad at him, yes, we are.”

  Hazel just smiled up at her with her big gummy grin. Ginger kept working, keeping up a constant stream of mindless chatter the whole time. She just rambled on, going over all of her fears and feelings all the while cooing and smiling, chattering in a high pitched voice. By the time she was finished, she realized she had finished nearly everything Beau had asked of her and then some.

  She sighed as she realized that not only was she totally caught up on laundry, she had made their bed, and cleaned up the bathrooms, and unloaded the dishwasher as well. So much for being un-cooperative. The house, which had been pretty clean to begin with, nearly sparkled from her efforts.

  “Well, isn’t that just great,” she muttered. Ginger realized belatedly that she was spoiling for a fight with Beau. She actually wanted him to be mad, and she had no idea why. Fighting back a yawn, she smiled as the baby yawned with her. A nap sounded great, but a quick glance at the clock told her that school was already out for the day, and Beau would be getting home soon. She needed to pull out something to have for dinner, so it would be ready to throw in the oven when he got home.

  Ginger yawned again, and as she did, she smiled. She could take a nap with Hazel, and forget about dinner. She had done enough for one day, and it would be the one way to let him know what she thought about his stupid list, anyway.

  It took her only a few minutes to change Hazel, and lay down on the bed with her, ready for a nap. Of course, the minute she did her phone rang. She looked at it, and sighed. It was Beau.

  “Hey,” she answered, trying her best to sound bored.

  “Hi, honey, I just realized we forgot about Laney’s surprise party tonight. So don’t worry about pulling anything out for dinner. Just make sure you and the baby are ready to go when I get home.”

  Darn it, she thought to herself. Of course, now I don’t even need to make dinner. She gritted her teeth together.

  “When will you be home?” It was already five.

  “I’m leaving here in the next ten minutes, and I’ll need about five minutes to change when I get there. So, be ready in thirty minutes.”

  Ginger peered at herself in the mirror. She was not ready for a party, nor could she possibly have herself and Hazel ready in such a short time. She didn’t plan on going, but she would let him know when he got home.

  “Okay, honey, see you soon.”

  She hung up the phone and curled up next to Hazel on the bed. Hazel was already asleep, and Ginger was ready to join her. She felt mildly guilty about not going to Laney’s surprise party, but her cousin would have to understand. She had a new baby, and she couldn’t do things on such short notice.

  She was already dozing when Beau came in.

  “What are you doing? You’re supposed to be getting ready to go. Josiah wants us all there and ready before him and Laney get there! Everyone is coming straight off work!”

  “I’m not going,” she informed him, without opening her eyes. “You go. Have fun. I’ll call her later. Her birthday’s not until tomorrow anyway.”

  “Ginger!” Beau exclaimed, shaking her gently. “Laney is your cousin, and this is a big deal! It’s her dirty thirty! You have to go! Now get up and change, right now.”

  She opened her eyes then, long enough to roll over and fix him with her most awesome death glare. “If you wanted me to go, you should have remembered to tell me before it got down to the last possible second. I busted my butt today working on your stupid little list, and now, I’m tired and sweaty and there is no way I can get Hazel and myself ready to go in time. It’s fine. Laney will get over it. Now go and have a good time.”

  “Excuse me?” Beau was indignant. “You don’t get to talk to me like that. Ginger? Ginger!”

  She had already rolled over and closed her eyes and was pretending to sleep. She lay there listening to him sputter, careful not to move, until she heard him give up and exit the room.

  When she was sure he was gone, she sat up in bed and turned on the tv. She was much too upset to sleep now.

  Beau put on a fake smile as he entered the clubhouse where the party was being held. The place was packed, Josiah had really gone all out. He spotted Laney and Josiah in the corner of the room talking to Jonathan Travers, Jonathan’s HoH Benjamin and a young man he didn’t recognize at first glance.

  Straightening his tie, he purposefully strode toward them, greeting Laney with a warm hug as soon as he reached them. “Happy Birthday, Laney.”

  “Beau! You made it!” she squealed as she pulled away. “Where’s Ginger?” she asked, scanning the room. “I have to show her something.” She colored, sticking her hand behind her back quickly, her cheeks flushed with joy.

  Beau sighed. He hadn’t missed the huge sparkling diamond on Laney’s ring finger. He was angry that her cousin wasn’t there to share this moment with her. “I’m really sorry, Laney. It’s my fault, I forgot about it until the last minute, and I didn’t give her enough time to get ready. She and Hazel were napping when I got home.” Beau gave a forced smile, and hoped that no one would notice his teeth grinding together as he spoke.

  “It’s okay.” Laney looked crestfallen even as she said it, but she too, faked a smile. “I’m just glad that you’re here.”

  “Hey, man, good to see you.” It was the blond stranger who spoke. Close up Beau could see that it wasn’t a stranger at all, but Danny, who did their weekly seafood deliveries and had become close to Laney and Ginger both. It made sense that Josiah would have invited him. Danny didn’t live in Corbin’s Bend, but he knew many of them, Brent himself included, considered him an honorary resident. He had heard rumors that there was even a pool going on how long it would take for Danny to become a resident.

  Beau greeted Danny with a handshake. He had met him several times, but never engaged in conversation with him. From what he did know of him, he was generally a very outgoing and fun loving guy, but that wasn’t coming out in him tonight. Danny was very quiet, and seemed uncomfortable being there. Beau caught Laney giving him more than a few suspicious looks.

  Danny leaned back with his hands in his pockets, rocking back on his heels. “So, how’s Ginger doing? I’m bummed she didn’t make it tonight. I was looking forward to seeing the baby, finally. I’ve only ever seen pics so far.”

  “She’s good, just tired. I’ll tell her you said hello.”

  “Yeah, do that.” Danny fell quiet, his eyes darting anxiously around the room. “Well, I’ve got an early morning tomorrow, so I’m going to head out. Happy birthday, Laney, and congrats to you both.” He gave her a quick side hug, and all but ran out the clubhouse door.

  “Okay, seriously, what is wrong with him lately? That was weird!” Laney exclaimed a little too loudly, causing Josiah to give her a stern warning look. As usual, it didn’t faze her. “What? Everybody was thinking it! He’s not acting like himself at all!” She frowned, unable to let it go. “He didn’t call me Princess all night, and he didn’t even refer to Ginger as the Ginger Queen once. It’s not like him, I’m telling you, something’s wrong. Danny has nicknames for everybody, and he always uses them.”

  The rest of the small group nodded their agreement. Jonathan opened his mouth to say something, but was quickly cut off with a discreet pat, and warning glare from Benjamin. Jonathan grumbled, but quieted.

  “I think Danny is just going through some stuff right now, and wasn’t in the party mood, but he came anyway because you mean a lot to him.” It was Benjamin who spoke, his hand
still resting discreetly on his partner’s lower back. Jonathan just nodded, and with an unconvinced sigh, Laney let it go.

  “Fine. Hey Beau, can you tell Ginger that I really need her to come in this week, so we can look over the books? I really need to get paid soon. I mean, with planning a wedding and everything, I’m going to have a lot of expenses coming up, and I’ve been patient enough.”

  “I’m sorry?” Beau questioned, doing a double take. “What are you talking about, you’ve been patient enough? You haven’t been paid? Since when?”

  Laney looked horrified. “I…I…Forget it, I’ll call her tomorrow,” she backpedaled.

  Beau stepped forward, his heart pounding angrily, as he tried to keep his cool. “Lannea,” he growled. “Tell me what you mean. When was the last time you were paid?”

  Laney stared at the floor. “When you did the end of the year books,” she admitted, not looking him in the eye.

  Beau had to work to keep his voice calm, he was seeing red as he processed this information. “That’s three months! You mean to tell me nobody has been paid in three months? How is the business even functioning?”

  Laney threw her hands up in front of her to stop him from going off the deep end. “Beau, I’m half owner, now remember. I can write checks. The suppliers and employees are getting paid, it’s just Ginger and I that haven’t been. I make deposits weekly, and I pay bills weekly. But Ginger and I don’t get paid until we do the monthly profit and loss, and see what our revenue is. She’s supposed to do that; she told me not to worry about it. Besides, I’ve been kind of busy with everything else.”

  He relaxed a little, once he realized things weren’t as dire as he had been thinking. Still, Ginger owned a business, and she needed to be responsible for that business. He had known that she had been staying home a lot, but he had assumed she was going in every once and a while, or at least doing some work from home. He couldn’t believe how naive he had been. Things were even worse than he thought.