Christmas Angels

by Nadine Dorries

  Matron had been sympathetic. ‘I quite agree. A roast dinner wouldn’t satisfy that one. It seems unnecessarily cruel to make a baby wait for a feed and I don’t agree about the timings, I never have. But paediatrics is the ward where I have the least say, as you know.’ She sighed. ‘What Liverpool children’s services says goes, I’m afraid, and it’s the same in every children’s ward in the city, unfortunately.’

  Matron watched the first-year nurse desperately trying to placate the child and frowned. ‘The poor thing. They are so full of wind from crying, by the time the four hours comes around it’s even harder to keep the feed down, and then it starts all over again, a vicious circle. But I’m not the doctor and I’m afraid that there are only so many rules I can break at any one time.’ She raised her eyebrows despairingly.

  If Matron could have had her way, doctors would only be allowed on to the wards for one ward round and emergency calls. And children’s services would have no say in anything beyond outpatients. But that was never going to happen. In fact Dr Walker was never away from the place, except when he was on one course or another. Aileen loved it when he wasn’t around.

  Closing the kitchen fridge, Aileen scanned the work surfaces and opened the door of the steamer to check that all the glass bottles had been stood upside down, the rubber teats turned inside out and the milk cleaned out properly. Satisfied, she turned around and nearly jumped out of her skin to find Sister Tapps right behind her.

  ‘Oh, hello! You surprised me there. How are you? Are you looking forward to your Christmas break? I have to say, I envy you. I’ve never had a Christmas off.’

  Sister Tapps looked confused. She was gripping a bedraggled teddy bear in her hand. Aileen quickly recognized it as ‘that’ teddy. The one that sat in her office and which no one was allowed to move. She thought it rather endearing that Tappsy was so attached to it and even felt the need to take it with her when she went away.

  ‘Are you spending Christmas with your family?’

  But Tappsy continued to look muddled, and Aileen felt both embarrassed and guilty at having put her on the spot. She heard footsteps on the stairs and looked towards the door. Freddie had promised to pop in sometime today, and they needed to talk about meeting at the rehearsal later and the party afterwards.

  Sister Tapps interrupted her train of thought. ‘Yes, I’m off to my brother-in-law’s. I’m having Christmas with him and my niece and nephew. I’m leaving now in fact. You have the last of my babies on your ward and so there is no need for me to stay any longer.’

  Aileen felt her heart contract. The look on Sister Tapps’s face near killed her, and the way she was gripping on to the teddy. Impulsively, she threw her arm around Tappsy’s shoulders and hugged her, trying not to recoil at the unexpected sharpness of her bones. ‘Don’t give this place another thought. I will look after your children. I have your nurses, and I will look after them too. What we want is for you to have a lovely Christmas and a good rest. You will do that, won’t you?’

  Sister Tapps nodded. ‘I will miss the carol singing on Christmas Eve – the children always love that, with the nurses coming round and stopping for a singsong at every ward. When we hear the nurses downstairs on ward one, I know they’ll be coming to us next. It’s when Christmas really starts, and we switch on the Christmas lights.’

  Tappsy’s eyes were bright, almost tearful. Aileen had never heard her talk so much.

  ‘I know,’ she said. ‘I trained on your ward, remember. You taught me everything I know, and that’s why you can trust me. I know it’s my first Christmas on here as ward sister, but I will follow your routine, do everything the way you do it. It will be just like you’re still here.’

  She heard Freddie moving around outside and she was torn. He was impatiently shuffling from foot to foot and she heard the wood of the visitors’ bench complain as it creaked under his weight.

  She smiled down at Sister Tapps and this time there was no mistaking the tears that rushed into Tappsy’s eyes. ‘Sshh, don’t you get upset,’ she said. ‘Goodness me, what would your nephew and niece think if they saw you. Come on, it’s time for you to begin your much needed rest from this place. Time for you to have a Christmas where it’s all about you and not twenty demanding little people. If you ask me, you deserve a medal, not just a break.’

  She walked down the corridor with her arm still around Sister Tapps. As they reached the top of the stairs she exclaimed, ‘Oh my! You can’t go yet! What was I thinking of? Wait here.’

  She spun round and winked at Freddie, who was looking at her with amusement and anticipation. He didn’t mind waiting – just watching her was a treat.

  Two minutes later she came flying back out of her office, carrying a Christmas present and a card.

  ‘This is for you,’ she said. ‘I guessed you would be travelling somewhere and so I didn’t want to make it anything cumbersome to carry. It’s just my way of saying thank you. I am so happy to be up here with you on paediatrics and, well, anyway, merry Christmas.’

  Sister Tapps’s face flushed and for a moment she stared at the gift Aileen had thrust into her hand as though it might explode. Recovering, she stammered, ‘Oh, thank you. Thank you so much. With having to move all the children and nurses, and with all that needed to be done for the ward handover and everything, I haven’t—’

  ‘Don’t be silly,’ said Aileen. ‘I especially wanted you to have this, because I want to make sure you don’t forget us on Christmas morning. I know you’ll be busy with your family, but when you open this, I expect you to feel thoroughly guilty and miss us, just for the briefest moment, and really, more importantly, I want you to know that however much you’re missing us, we’ll be missing you ten times more. And I’ll tell you this, I bet there won’t be ten minutes while you’re away when someone doesn’t say, “What would Sister Tapps do?”’

  Aileen laughed – she had to, because Sister Tapps looked like she was about to burst into tears. Freddie coughed and both women glanced towards the policeman sitting on the visitors’ bench with a sheepish grin on his face.

  ‘You have a lovely Christmas too,’ said Sister Tapps, ‘and I shall certainly be thinking about you.’

  Just at that moment, Pammy Tanner raced out on to the landing between the two wards.

  ‘You weren’t running just then, were you, Nurse Tanner?’ Aileen asked with far more authority in her voice than she realized she possessed.

  ‘Er, no, Sister Paige. Louis is asleep and so I thought I’d just nip down to the laundry to fetch his clean clothes. The housekeeper said she would be washing them by hand because they’re made of wool. I’ll be five minutes.’

  Aileen smiled. At the mention of Louis’s name, everyone smiled. Restoring his life and health had been a joint effort and they all took pride in his progress.

  ‘I will be thinking about you all more than you know,’ Tappsy said as she watched Pammy disappear from view. ‘If you don’t mind, I’ll just go and wish my nurses a merry Christmas and say a final goodbye, before I… er… leave.’

  Without waiting for a response, she turned towards the doors of ward three. It was not her ward and they were not her doors. Half of the children in there were not hers, but as soon as she stepped inside and could see her own charges, positioned in a semicircle in the bay at the bottom in front of the roaring fire, she beamed a happy smile. The pain in her side faded and the sadness slipped away.

  *

  Freddie wasted no time. As the ward doors swung shut, he sprang to his feet. ‘About time,’ he said, taking a quick glance down the stairs to check the coast was still clear. ‘Have you a minute for a word?’

  He grinned and Aileen felt that thing that kept happening every time he smiled at her. Her stomach flipped somersaults and her mouth went dry. Right now she didn’t feel like the confident and organized Sister Paige she normally was, the Sister Paige who was to be responsible for the lives and wellbeing of twenty poorly children and babies over Christmas. Right now she felt
as though she were seventeen again, and her heart fluttered just like it had back then.

  ‘Let’s step into the milk kitchen,’ she said, worried that one of her nurses would come looking for her. ‘There are an awful lot of staff on the ward today. I have almost one nurse to four patients, and Sister Tapps is down there just now too. And it seems Dr Walker is back as well – two of my nurses saw him driving in earlier. Goodness knows how he’ll react to seeing the baby he wanted to be left to die now looking so healthy, but let’s cross that bridge when we—’

  Freddie wasn’t listening, and before she could finish her sentence he had pulled her into his arms and was kissing her. That was by far the most important thing he had to do that morning – to get over any awkwardness and take them back to their goodbye kiss at the bus stop. To the night of their first date. The hours since had been agony and he could not bear the small talk. He had made his mind up and there was nothing that would change it. Aileen was the woman he had been waiting for. He wanted to marry her and he didn’t care how long it took, he was determined to make it happen.

  Aileen broke away quickly and looked out of the door towards the ward. ‘Freddie, I’m on duty – don’t! I have to get back. I’m taking over looking after Louis shortly, when Nurse Tanner has her break.’

  Freddie’s voice was husky with emotion. ‘God, I’ve been looking forward to that!’ he said. ‘I know it was wrong and I’m sorry, but I wanted you to know that I’m not playing games here. This is real for me.’ He tried to kiss her again.

  ‘Stop,’ she said, pushing him away. ‘You can’t do that. We’re both on duty – are you mad or what?’ Even as she protested, she had to fight to keep the smile from her face. ‘It’s a good job everyone’s busy and there’s still plenty of time until the feeds. But I have to get back to the ward.’ Both hands flew to her frilled sister’s cap to check it was still in place. ‘It will be fine once we’ve got to know all the new children, but it’s a little bit on the hectic side right now, and with baby Louis and all.’

  ‘How is he today?’ asked Freddie. He couldn’t tear his eyes away from the buttons at the top of her dress and the only thought in his mind was how, when and where he would get to undo them. He had rehearsed the moment so many times in his mind that he felt almost guilty.

  ‘And here, put that back on.’ She picked up his helmet from the table where he’d put it down when he walked in. ‘Honestly! Now, please, this a hospital ward.’

  He noted she was smiling. He was back on safer ground. He grinned as he fastened the buckle on his chinstrap. ‘Have you got cover for your mother for tonight?’ he asked, looking her in the eye. For the first time in his life he was in love with a woman he had met only a handful of times.

  ‘I have. I told her about it yesterday morning, said I’d be later than usual tonight. Gina’s sitting in for me.’

  Freddie grinned from ear to ear, but Aileen felt uneasy. Lying to her mother had been difficult – she had been difficult. And yet something deep inside Aileen had made her hold her ground. She would have to think longer about her mother’s comments about selling the house and Aileen giving up her job. She had already decided she would go and see Josie and ask her what she was playing at, but that would have to wait because right now she had a ward to run.

  *

  Mrs Duffy huffed and puffed her way up to the children’s ward. ‘Oh, those stairs,’ she said, just as Freddie turned the corner and began to take the steps two at a time down towards her.

  ‘Here, let me take that,’ he said as he lifted the box from her arms.

  ‘Oh, you are a good boy. Freddie, is it? You’re the new policeman on the docklands roads, aren’t you? Nurse Tanner told me about you being on the ward.’

  Freddie didn’t have time to reply as Biddy and Branna appeared at the bottom of the stairs.

  ‘Mrs Duffy, what a sight for sore eyes you are,’ said Biddy. ‘I thought they kept you locked in that home and never let you out.’

  Mrs Duffy pointedly ignored Biddy and turning to Branna said, ‘Morning, Branna, what a treat to see you. Are you helping us with the decorations?’

  ‘I am that,’ Branna replied. ‘Apparently I’m a dab hand at the decorating, even though I’ve never put one up in me life.’

  Emily arrived at the bottom of the stairs behind them, with Dr Mackintosh at her side, just as Pammy joined them from the opposite direction with her arms full of freshly laundered baby clothes. She looked at the gathering and said, ‘Oh, Mam, it’s you lot making all that noise!’ And then in her most officious manner, she added, ‘Excuse me, can I get past, please. Some of us have work to do.’

  The air filled with the familiar clatter of a hospital trolley being pulled along. Jake had commandeered one for the decorations and was dragging it along with the handle behind his back just as he did with the trolleyloads of linen that he transported up and down the corridors day after day.

  ‘Oi! No hello for your mam then, high-and-mighty Nurse Tanner?’ said Maisie as Pammy grabbed the banister ready to mount the stairs.

  Maisie had been joking, but Pammy was totally serious. ‘No, Mam,’ she said firmly. ‘I have a patient waiting for me.’ And then in a softer tone, and casting a glance towards Sister Haycock, who was talking to Biddy, she added, ‘I’ll see you on the ward. The children are all very excited about the decorations. Beside themselves, some of them are.’

  They all stood aside to let Pammy pass. Emily smiled at Mrs Duffy and was somewhat surprised not to have her smile returned. Instead, a distinctly cold shoulder was presented her way. She was about to complain and ask Mrs Duffy what on earth was wrong when Aileen Paige ran out on to the landing screaming.

  ‘It’s Louis! He’s gone! Where is he? Has someone taken him?’

  16

  Freddie ran to the office, picked up the telephone and asked Madge to put him through to the Whitechapel police station as fast as possible. A child had disappeared on his watch! He paced the stairs and the corridor for what seemed like hours as he waited for CID, periodically peering down the ward through the circular windows in the doors to see if by happy chance someone had found baby Louis.

  Aileen was crying and was nothing short of distraught. Staff Nurse was frantically looking in the cupboards of the sluice room, and no one knew why. Nurses were searching under beds and almost shouting to each other. ‘Have you found him?’ Emily was comforting Aileen and trying her best to take control. The children were sitting in their beds, watching and frightened.

  The only people not in a panic were the worldly-wise domestics, who had all survived the May Blitz and knew the difference between a life-and-death drama and a missing baby. Maisie and Biddy found themselves stepping quite naturally into nursing roles as they set about calming what had rapidly become a tense atmosphere on the ward.

  ‘But no one came past us in the corridor,’ said Biddy. ‘How can that have happened? Surely to God one of the nurses would have seen the ward doors open? And anyone not in a uniform would have stuck out like a sore thumb. No one comes on to these wards if they aren’t in some sort of uniform.’

  Mrs Duffy was shaking her head in bewilderment. ‘I didn’t see a single person the entire length of the corridor with a baby in their arms,’ she said.

  ‘Right, I’m going to make tea for all of us and set up a drinks trolley with a few treats on it for those littl’uns,’ said Branna. ‘We need to do something here to help out, and fast.’

  ‘I’ll help you, Branna,’ said Mrs Duffy, who always made tea in moments of crisis.

  ‘Smashing, ladies,’ said Maisie. ‘I’ll move Sister Haycock and Sister Paige into the office and close the door. They can talk in there. And we’ll go and cheer the kids up, won’t we, Biddy? Our Pammy and these poor nurses are going to have their hands full today.’

  ‘We will,’ said Biddy, ‘but first I’m ringing for Dessie to come up with some ladders. The best way we can distract those kids is to get on with putting up the decorations. I’ll use th
e phone in the ward four office. Where’s Madge? She was supposed to be here.’

  They all turned towards the office to see that Madge had arrived, and was already on the phone, calling Matron.

  ‘I think you need to get to ward three quickly, Matron,’ Madge was saying. ‘It’s baby Louis, he’s gone.’

  Matron sank down on to the chair in her office. ‘Oh no,’ she said. ‘And we all thought he was doing so well. Sister Paige was looking forward to him enjoying his first Christmas Day.’

  ‘The policeman who was here, he’s just told me that the CID are on their way, Matron.’

  ‘How is everyone on the ward? And, Madge, why is it you telling me this and not Sister or one of the nurses? It should be Sister Paige telephoning me, not you.’

  ‘I’m not on switch today – Bryan is covering for me while I help with the decorations for the competition. Sister Haycock is just calming Sister Paige down. She was a bit shocked like, said she had never lost a baby before.’

  Matron’s brow furrowed. ‘Never lost a baby before? Sadly, she has lost plenty. Especially during that bout of whooping cough last winter.’

  Now it was Madge’s turn to be confused.

  ‘And what of the nurses, why are they too busy to call?’

  ‘Because, Matron, they are looking for the baby. They’ve looked everywhere. Nurse Tanner is checking the beds of the children in the bay to see if one of them has slipped him in there and Nurse Harper is looking in the cupboards in the milk kitchen, and Staff Nurse, she has all the sheets out from the linen cupboard all over the floor, looking for him in there. Matron, I don’t think anyone knows what to do, they are all a bit frantic on here, they need you.’