by Kat Mizera
“She’s the reason I scored—I’ll look at her all I want,” Vlad snipped, though he was still grinning from ear to ear.
Toli shook his head. “You’re in so much trouble—this is going to be fun.”
Vlad almost stuck his tongue out at him but caught himself in time. What the hell was wrong with him? He’d known Rachel for two days and he was talking about his feelings with another guy, holding out on sex so that it would be more special and almost acting like a three-year-old on the ice. What the fuck? If this was love, he was going to need to find a way to stop the insanity.
“So that’s your new girlfriend?” Zakk nudged him as they skated back to the bench. “She’s kinda cute.”
“She is much more than cute,” Vlad countered.
“Rachel Kennedy,” Toli whispered in Zakk’s ear. Zakk’s mouth fell open, but Vlad was only half-listening as Coach Barnett spoke to him quietly.
“Are you kidding?” Zakk stage whispered to Toli.
Toli shrugged. “You know what’s cool? I think our slut puppy is falling hard and fast—this is going to be awesome!”
“Unless she breaks his heart.”
“Da.” Yes. Toli momentarily slipped into Russian. “But this is part of life. One way or another, he will experience it so it might as well happen when he’s got all of us to help him through it.”
Zakk shook his head. “You’re right—but it’s still going to be fun.”
“I heard that,” Vlad muttered, giving his friends a look.
Rachel woke up the following Sunday morning with a smile on her face. Vlad would be arriving in a few hours and though she wouldn’t see him until after the game, it was almost impossible to contain her excitement. She spent the afternoon working out and making sure she had everything she needed for the upcoming week. Sundays were usually her day to do nothing but knowing that Vlad would probably spend the night, she wanted to make sure she didn’t have to think about anything but him. They’d danced around the subject of having sex all week and she’d been careful not to push it. He was decidedly nervous about that aspect of their relationship, and she almost wished she hadn’t told him about her thoughts on lovemaking. She wanted their time together to be easy and uncomplicated, despite the realities of life with the kinds of jobs they had. She probably needed to express that but was afraid it would sound like she was jumping into a relationship.
Driving down to Anaheim, she got to the arena right when the doors opened and wandered down to the ice, sinking into her seat and watching as people started to arrive. She didn’t come to Anaheim much, preferring to see the Kings in L.A. if she went to a hockey game, but she’d been more than happy to come for Vlad. He was flying home in the morning and she had to be at work at seven tomorrow morning, but they were hoping for a few hours together before they had to separate. Luckily, the game was at three o’clock so there would be time before it got too late.
“Rachel?” A voice spoke behind her and Rachel turned in surprise.
“Hi there!” Molly Gianni, Dom’s wife, smiled at her. “I thought that was you. Dom said Vlad had gotten you a ticket, so I hope you’ll be sitting with us?”
“Thank you, I’d love to.” Rachel followed her and was relieved to see faces she recognized. Suze Armstrong, Kate Martensson, and Erin Riser were married to players that had been friends with Jamie, and they waved as Rachel and Molly approached. She sank down between them happily, eager to catch up even though she didn’t know what she was going to tell them about Vlad.
“Hey!” They all exchanged pleasantries.
“Do you come to a lot of games in Anaheim?” Suze asked her.
Rachel sighed. “Um, no. Actually, almost never.”
Kate cocked her head. “So there’s a reason you came today?”
“Are you dating someone else on the team?” Suze guessed, her eyes widening.
Rachel groaned. “God, I hate feeling like I’m doing something wrong! But I met him by accident—it’s not what it seems.”
“Who is it?” Kate asked curiously.
“Wait, let’s guess!” Suze grinned. “Brock Lassiter!”
“Oh! No.” Rachel giggled. “Too much facial hair for my liking!”
The girls all giggled too; Brock sported a full beard that hung down several inches from his chin. He was a complete Neanderthal sometimes, although women seemed to love him.
“Matt Forbes is single again,” Kate murmured.
“Nope.” Rachel shook her head. “Think younger.”
“Younger?” Molly frowned. “One of the rookies?”
Rachel couldn’t help but laugh. “Tall. Bedroom eyes. Russian.”
Suze’s mouth fell open. “Vlad?”
The women all stared at her.
“But he doesn’t date!” Kate protested. “He’s a total man-whore!”
“He’s very sweet,” Erin spoke up for the first time, her blue eyes twinkling. “He’s been on the fast track to screwing every unattached woman in Vegas under the age of thirty—he could probably use a little stability in his life.”
“I don’t know if I qualify for that.” Rachel laughed. “But he’s really, really sweet.”
“And hot.” Molly grinned at her.
“There is that,” Rachel agreed.
“Is he concerned about your history with Jamie?” Suze asked cautiously.
“I was the one worried about it when Vlad and I met, but the alternative would be not dating him at all, which is unfair. And anyway, he says it’s no big deal. We’re all friends and Jamie’s moved on.”
“Are you worried we’ll judge you for dating two different players?” Suze asked knowingly.
Rachel nodded.
“It might be a little weird if Jamie was still playing here,” Erin said. “But since he’s not, I don’t think it’s a big deal.”
“So you and Vlad,” Kate smirked, moving the conversation in a different direction. “That’s kind of cool. He’s young, but I’m guessing with all the sleeping around he’s done he’s not a disappointment in bed?”
Rachel felt her cheeks get red. “Um, well…”
“Well?” Molly prompted.
“We haven’t done that yet.”
Four pairs of eyes turned to stare at her. “Wait, how long has this been going on?” Kate demanded.
“Two weeks?”
“And you haven’t had sex?” Erin gaped at her.
“We decided to wait.” Rachel bit her lip. She couldn’t believe she was telling them this, but it seemed as though once you were part of the group, nothing was off-limits.
“For what?” Suze asked.
“I’m not sure. I think it has to do with me trying to explain the difference between making love and fucking.” She repeated the gist of their conversation.
“You know if you get serious there’s going to be talk?” Suze spoke gently. “And some of it might not be very flattering.”
“I know.” Rachel lowered her gaze. “But we haven’t done anything wrong. Vlad and I met at a casino by accident. Besides, I really like him, and I’m used to gossip. It’s par for the course in my line of work.”
“I think it’s great,” Kate said. “Our group, and the guys on the team, will be fine. But in your world, the media can be relentless.”
Rachel sighed. “It comes with the job.”
It seemed time to change the subject, so Erin said, “Now let me get this straight; you spent some time together, didn’t have sex, and you’re seeing each other tonight. Is tonight the night?”
“God, I hope so!” Rachel giggled. “It’s been almost four months for me!”
“That’s a long time,” Kate said sympathetically. “I’m pregnant with twins and we still have sex every day when he’s home!”
“Every day?” Rachel sighed dreamily. “I haven’t had sex on a regular basis in ages!”
“Hopefully you’ll get some tonight!” Molly grinned.
Rachel raised her cup of wine. “Amen to that!”
11<
br />
Present Day
The next afternoon, Vlad pulled up to a quaint but modern house about thirty minutes outside of Moscow in the Krylatskoye District. He’d had an intense but fun practice with Coach Vlacic’s team this morning, followed by an hour of autograph-signing and selfie-taking. Then he’d headed back to the hotel to change and get something to eat before following directions to Natalya’s house. He sat outside for a moment, looking around. Natalya probably had a good life here in a middle-class neighborhood that looked clean, safe, and somewhat well-to-do. That she’d married Coach Vlacic’s son made him happy. He was five or six years older than Vlad, and Coach Vlacic told Vlad he was a scout for a KHL team, which meant he made a good living even though he was probably gone a lot.
Getting out of the car, he strolled up to the front door with a bakery box full of fresh cookies. He didn’t know what to expect or if Coach Vlacic had called to tell her he was coming, but he was glad for the opportunity to see her again, even if she didn’t have any information for him. She’d been his first sexual partner, the first girl he’d kissed even. He’d been sixteen and she was seventeen, brought in to make men out of the guys on the team who didn’t have families, girlfriends. Mostly, the girls were brought in so the guys on the team didn’t go out looking for sex. They wanted them solely focused on hockey but understood the libidos of boys that age could be a distraction.
Vlad had been awed by the sweet, sexy blonde who’d showed him the way around a woman’s body, though she told him she’d only been with one other guy before him. Apparently, her virginity had been worth a year’s rent, and the man who’d taken it kept her with him for a year before setting her free. He didn’t remember much else, but maybe something in her story would help him discover more about his own.
He knocked on the door and tapped his foot nervously, hoping she was home and would be happy to see him. He heard footsteps inside and a voice calling out as the lock turned. The door swung open and Natalya stood there, a tow-headed baby on her hip, her eyes wide with shock as she took him in.
“Vlad?” Her voice was a shocked whisper.
“Hello.” He smiled. “Your father-in-law told me where to find you. Is it okay that I’ve come to see you?”
“I, er, yes, of course.” She stared for a few more seconds before shaking her head in disbelief. “Come in, please.”
He followed her into the house, happy to see it was modern and comfortable. She led him to a bright, airy kitchen and motioned to a small table by the window.
“Can I get you something? Coffee? Water?”
“No, thank you.” He put the box of cookies on the counter. “I brought these for you.”
“Thank you.” She turned and smiled, her blue eyes twinkling. “So. Vladimir Kolnikov. What are you doing back in Russia, in my house, no less?”
“Didn’t Coach, er, your father-in-law tell you I was coming?”
She shook her head. “He called, asked if I would be home this morning, and when I said yes, told me he had a surprise for me. That’s all. I had no idea…” She bounced the baby, who’d begun to fuss, and Vlad reached out to tickle the infant’s feet.
“How old is he?”
“Eight months.” She grinned, nuzzling the back of the baby’s neck. “He was a surprise, but a good one.”
“How long have you been married?”
“A little over a year,” she said. “We’d been dating for three years before this happened. The pregnancy was accidental, but the timing was good. Kosta had just gotten the job with Dinamo Minsk, but we decided not to move because I would be alone there while he travels. Here, I have his family, our friends…” Her eyes met his. “You didn’t come to hear about my life. Why are you here, Vlad? You said you would never come back to Russia once you got to America.”
Vlad sank into the nearest chair and ran a hand over his short hair. “I have questions…about my past. I feel like part of me is empty.”
“This is why you embarrassed your fiancée, because you were searching for the past?” Her eyes held no censure, but Vlad felt it anyway and sighed.
“I was stupid,” he admitted. “I should have talked to her… I felt ridiculous. I can’t explain it. All I could think about was running. The weird thing is, I wanted her to come with me—I just couldn’t ask her.”
She sat on the chair across from him and bounced the baby on her knee as she spoke. “You never liked to talk,” she remembered quietly. “You liked to listen, you liked to touch, and you liked to feel. But not talk. Getting you to tell me anything, even good things, was like pulling teeth.”
He nodded. “I know.”
“Do you love her?”
“Very much.”
“But you couldn’t talk to her.”
He shook his head. “I couldn’t talk to anyone.”
“You’re talking to me.”
“You came from the same miserable background I did. We only knew each other about a year, but in a lot of ways, we grew up together. Neither of us had parents, family to lean on, so we made the most of what we had.”
“We did,” she said softly. “But we both got through it. You’re in America doing what you love. And I have a family, which is all I ever wanted. Why are you risking your future for a past that almost certainly will break your heart?”
“Did you know your parents?” he asked abruptly.
She shook her head. “My grandmother raised me until I was ten, and then she died. My father left when my mother found out she was pregnant, and she died when I was six months old—suicide. My grandmother said it was because she had a broken heart. I never knew either of them, and honestly? Why the fuck would I go look for that bastard now? Even if he didn’t love my mother, he still could have been a father to me, so the fact he left tells me what I need to know about him. Maybe there were circumstances, things we didn’t know, but he definitely knew about me because my grandmother was there when my mother told him. She said he told her he had to go home, think about it; they never saw him again. What good would it do for me to find out exactly why he disappeared? Fuck him. Fuck the past. The past sucks.” She looked down at her son, who had his fist in his mouth and was gurgling happily. “This is what’s important. My son. My husband. Our life together.”
Vlad nodded. “Yes, but you know the history. You know your father left. You know your mother loved him. You know she died. You know their names… I know nothing. I especially don’t know why a woman named Irina paid for me to start playing hockey.”
Natalya frowned. “I don’t remember an Irina.”
“She was involved with my first team, when I was ten. I didn’t know it then, but I spoke with my old coach yesterday and he told me. He also told me to forget the past and go home.”
“But you’re not going to.” She shook her head. “Well, then ask what you want to know. I don’t think I know anything about your past, but I’ll tell you what I can.”
“How were you chosen for me?”
She frowned. “I don’t think I was, not at first. I sold my virginity to one of the coaches on the Olympic team and he kept me in an apartment, at his beck and call, for a year. He was ready to move on to someone else, so he introduced me to Grisha.”
“Who’s Grisha?”
“I’m not sure.” She shrugged. “He had a group of girls, prostitutes, but then he had us. A handful of us that were…” She hesitated. “Special? Elite, perhaps? We were younger, prettier, cleaner. Obviously, when I got to Grisha, I’d only been with one man. He asked me about this repeatedly, made me go to multiple doctors to get checked. He said if I was clean and healthy, he would send me to the young hockey players instead of disgusting old men who often were into every kinky thing in the world.”
“So we wound up together by accident?”
She looked thoughtful. “I think Grisha liked me, or at least thought I was pretty… When we arrived at the game the first night, he asked me what I thought of you.” She blushed. “I told him you were sexy and I’d be
happy to make you a man.”
They chuckled together. “You did a good job. At least none of my subsequent lovers have complained.”
“Did Rachel complain?”
He met her eyes. “You know her name?”
“I follow you online, see how you’re doing, watch clips from the games… We were friends. I care for you.”
He nodded. “Thank you. Yes, we are friends, and I care for you, too. You’re happy, yes?”
She smiled. “Very much. Kosta is wonderful. Did you know him?”
“Barely. I met him a few times, but he’s older, was already working with the team in some capacity… I don’t remember.”
“He’s good to me, loves me, doesn’t care about what I used to do or who I used to be. And that’s the most important thing. Does Rachel care that you don’t have parents? That you were an orphan?”
He shook his head. “No, not at all. She’s…” His voice trailed off and a familiar rush of guilt washed over him. “She’s not what you’d expect from a movie star. Sweet, gentle, caring. She’s everything I’ve ever wanted.”
“And you dumped her.”
“I didn’t dump her,” he huffed impatiently. “I had a panic attack and couldn’t go through with the wedding. My timing sucked and it’s been a complete disaster, but I never dumped her. When I get back to the States, I’m going to do everything in my power to make this up to her.”
“You’d better hurry,” Natalya said softly. “If I was her, I wouldn’t wait for you. You embarrassed her in front of the whole world. Even here in Russia, I saw what happened.”
His face burned with embarrassment and he drummed his fingers on the table. “I know. Believe me, I know. She won’t take my calls, though, so until I get back, there’s nothing I can do.”
“What else can I tell you?” she asked.
“Where to find Grisha.”
12
Eight months ago
Riding up the elevator to his hotel room, Rachel felt the first moment of trepidation. He’d been quiet after the game as they sat at the bar with the other players and their wives or girlfriends, and she wondered if it was because he was anxious to be alone with her or because he was uncomfortable dating someone most people on the team already knew. He said he wasn’t, but she wondered if it bothered him that she’d dated Jamie before him.