“Seriously, you’ve made fun of me for as long as I could remember. Don’t be nice to me just because of what I’ve been through. I’m stronger than you think.”
Jake nudged his twin brother. “Look cuz, just because we pick on you doesn’t mean what we say is true. If we weren’t related we’d totally hit it,” he teased.
Feeling disgusted, I smacked him on the arm. “You’re sick.”
He swatted me away. “I was only sayin’ you were doable. Calm down. You know it ain’t like that. All jokes aside, you’re smokin’ hot. Our friends have been givin’ us shit about hookin’ them up for years.”
I could feel the burning developing in my eyes. This wasn’t just some kind of confirmation for me. This was life changing. My whole life I’d felt out of place. It was as if I couldn’t let myself see what apparently everyone else did. This wasn’t like hearing my boyfriend, or even my parents telling me I was pretty. It was like asking the most critical skeptics. Not that I’d ever base my life on anything they said, the twin’s honest response had left me speechless. I was literally stunned that this was taking place.
When I saw Reese moving toward us I decided to accept their compliments before I could feel embarrassed. “Thanks guys.”
Jax quickly reached over and started messing up my hair. “No problem, nerd.”
Jake laughed. “Yeah, don’t go tellin’ anyone we said you were pretty. We wouldn’t want the family thinkin’ we went soft.”
I rolled my eyes, but nodded anyway. I didn’t care if I was the only person who ever knew what they’d said to me. It was unforgettable.
I watched them gather the rest of their belongings and walk inside of my parent’s house. At that same time Ethan’s vehicle pulled down the lane. In that moment I felt more beautiful than I could ever remember feeling. It was then that I knew I’d be able to give myself to my boyfriend, both inside and out I knew I wasn’t a waste of space.
Chapter 36
Ethan
Something was different about her. Even though I couldn’t put my finger on it, I knew it had something to do with her cousins. She’d always been sort of uncomfortable when they came around. Now, all of a sudden, she was full of smiles as they walked away.
After obtaining the bouquet of fall colored flowers I’d picked up on the way, I climbed out of the car to greet my lady. I still couldn’t get over how nice it felt to address her as mine. Her gaze filled me with warmth, as if to remind me that we were both finally where we knew we needed to be.
I wrapped my arms around her, and although it was nothing new, everything felt changed; so surreal. “I missed you,” she said as she whispered against my face.
“Me too. How was your appointment?” I asked as I separated us enough to look into those green eyes.
“It was good.”
I paid close attention to her cousins disappearing into the house. “How about them? Did they give you any shit?” I’d been around the family enough to know how things went. Her cousins were bullies at times. They didn’t mean any harm, but she always took it so personal. Had I been in her shoes I’m sure it wouldn’t be hard to understand her methods of reasoning.
“Actually,” she looked down at the ground and I watched her face turn to a shy grimace. “They said I’m beautiful.”
I could tell she was touched by their term of endearment. My hand lifted and coursed over her cheek. “You are.”
Chris shrugged and looked away, as if she couldn’t handle the compliment. “It’s hard to believe sometimes. I’ve never looked in the mirror and saw myself that way. It’s intense.”
“I’ve always seen the beauty, both inside and out. Don’t you understand that? You’re the most beautiful, true, innocent, lovin’, honest person I know. Darlin’, you’re nothin’ but a treasure.”
She began to giggle and shove me away. “Stop it. That’s just weird comin’ from you.”
I tossed up my hands. “What? It’s the truth.”
“You’re just tryin’ to get in my pants.” I watched as she continued shaking her head at my comment.
I crossed my arms over my chest. “I’m not goin’ to lie. It wouldn’t kill me to make love to you over and over until to the sun came up over the horizon, but that ain’t why I said it. I feel all of those things for you; I see them when I look at you.”
She stopped moving and just stared at me. It was impossible to stand so close and not reach out to touch her. Our hands laced together and with little effort I pulled her close to me. Her warm breath let me know she was near enough to kiss. I didn’t dawdle when it came to something so necessary. In that moment it was just us.
Our embrace was short-lived when we heard whistling, knowing it was coming from either of her cousins. She squeezed both of my hands as she spoke. “I want you to make love to me tonight, Ethan.”
“You know we can’t,” I replied quickly. “You’re not ready.”
“I am. The doctor says I’ll know it and I do.”
I refused to believe that she was. “I don’t expect anything.”
She pulled me closer so anyone lurking wouldn’t be able to hear. “You were my first for everything that matters. You showed me what it was like to feel completely loved when we are together. You’re my safe place, Ethan. Bein’ with you doesn’t make me feel nervous. It makes me feel alive again.”
I reached forward and kissed the top of her head, holding my lips there for a long amount of time. “I will never hurt you.”
“I know,” she whispered. Then, as if she wasn’t taking no for an answer, she continued. “Tonight. We’re goin’ to make love until the sun meets with the horizon. We’ll take our time, and when it’s all over I’ll have that last piece of myself back. I don’t just want this, Ethan. I need it. I need you. I need you to love me more than you ever have before. I need you to remind me that our love is stronger than anything that comes in our way.” All of a sudden I felt her trembling and noticed she was crying. It wasn’t a cry like she was in pain. It was more along the lines of being so determined that emotions were pouring out of her. I stroked her face and wiped away the residue.
“Okay, babe. You don’t have to beg. I’ll make love to you. I’ll give you my all with little effort, because lovin’ you is easy, it’s natural. My only concern will be you, and if you tell me to stop I -.”
“I won’t.” Chris shook her head. “I might need to pause, but I won’t ask you to stop. Every inch of my body wants to be with you again. I know I won’t want you to stop.”
“But if you do…I will. I’ll wait as long as it takes. Since I’m keepin’ you around forever, there’s no rush.”
“I’d rather not waste anymore time,” she said with an ornery snicker.
“Then I guess it’s settled. Tonight I’ll make love to you, and not because you asked me to, but more along of the lines of bein’ that close to you somehow completes me.”
“Keep talkin’ like that and we won’t make it to dinner.” With the vibes she was sending I was half-tempted to escort her somewhere private and get started. The last thing I wanted to do was hold in my excitement around her family. “I’m just teasin’,” I assured her. It was important to keep it together.
“No you’re not! Don’t forget how well I know you, Ethan.”
We kissed one more time after I pulled her close with a little jerk. She squealed and gave me a shocked look as she pulled away. “Yeah, maybe you do. All the more reason to take you to our special spot and get started.”
She pushed away full of smiles. While biting down on her lip she continued to step backwards. “When you’re sittin’ at the table near my father just imagine what you’re goin’ to do with me later. I might even give him a head’s up that we won’t be stickin’ around for dessert.” Chris took off running. Her laughter echoed off of the surrounding trees.
I stood there watching her go into the house, the whole time trying to rid myself of the image of being horny around her family. If they weren’t on high aler
t before we came out as a couple, they certainly were now. I imagined death by salad fork and almost cringed. Instead of eating, I was going to be clenching my silverware, hoping I didn’t have to use it for self-defense.
A couple hours later I sat there amongst her whole family with the idea of being intimate still lingering in my mind. I did my best to avoid eye contact, with not only Chris, but her father and brother. I only answered when addressed, and realized that they probably knew I was being ridiculously weird. It didn’t matter. As long as I could sit there at the table, and not think about how good it was going to feel to make love to my girl again, I’d be fine.
Unfortunately my girlfriend had other ideas. Her warm hand reached under the table as she carried on in a conversation with her brother. I forced my legs together to prevent a sudden growth beneath my meal.
While she continued taunting me, Chris would purposely include me in the conversation, expecting me to answer straight-faced. She was doing all of this on purpose and I couldn’t do anything to rectify the situation. It was quite obvious that I wouldn’t be able to get up and walk out of the room. The closer her fingers got to my crotch the more apparent it became. I started thinking long-term; how many extra minutes it would take me to calm down enough to be able to stand up.
For a moment I peered over and saw the fire in her eyes. Her cheerful mood lifted some of my anxiety, although it wasn’t enough to shake my fear of being forever known as the guy who got up from the Mitchell family table with a woody. Finally I came to the conclusion that I’d have to take matters into my own hands. As gently and not obvious as it could be, I removed her hand from my pants and gave her a look. She shot one back, but didn’t attempt to torture me again.
When everyone retreated to the living room for dessert I picked a chair that I could sit in by myself. It was vital that I have a good relationship with her family, since I knew I’d someday be a member.
Just when we all started talking about football, Chris came in with some kind of cake. It was covered in icing, and she was purposely taking her finger to draw up some and lick it off, all the while watching me react. I slowly gulped down the lump forming in my throat as I turned to ignore her innuendos. Of course, it wasn’t fast enough to defer wandering eyes. “Hey Ethan, you alright over there?” Noah asked. “You look like you’re about to bust a nut.”
As shocking as his remark came out, I watched as the room filled with laughing bodies.
“Whatever!” I spat out and crossed my legs. Directly in view was my girlfriend, steady eying me up. She was never going to hear the end of it if I made it out of the house alive. “Pick on someone else, Noah. You ain’t gettin’ me in trouble.”
“I’ll let it go, if you tell me when you started bangin’ my sister. You see, you never asked us for permission. We don’t take that kind of action lightly.”
Chris stood up and started marching toward me. “Shut up, Noah. You should have asked him that question a long time ago.”
I was petrified to look in the direction of her father, especially when she came to sit on my lap. A part of me wanted to run out before they located the hunting rifles.
“He’s just messin’ with ya, Ethan,” her father explained. “You have our blessin’, you know that.”
I nodded. “Thanks, sir. I appreciate that.”
“Boy, quit your worryin’. I think we all knew you two would end up together,” Noah teased.
Chris wrapped her arms around my neck. Her smile was comforting until she leaned up and whispered in my ear. “Let’s get out of here.”
I pulled away and looked at the vast amount of eyes staring at me. With little nerve left I refused to respond. Chris seemed annoyed as she waited for an answer. Out of nowhere she jumped up and went for the stairs. I watched as she climbed each one, never looking back at me.
“Now you’ve gone and did it. She’s pissed.”
“She is not,” I exclaimed, even though I didn’t know.
Not even a minute later she came downstairs with an overnight bag strapped to her shoulder. She walked over and kissed her dad on the cheek, whispering something in his ear, the whole time he was staring at me. Then he nodded.
She called out to everyone that we were leaving and took my hand. Before I knew it we were out on the front porch. “What are you doin’?”
“What’s it look like?” She asked.
“Chris, we can’t just leave.”
“We can. I asked my parents if we could sneak away and they said it was fine. Stop bein’ a worry wart. Don’t you want to be with me, Ethan?”
I sighed, feeling like I wasn’t in control at all. “Of course I do.”
“Then let’s go.”
Ten minutes later we were at the main house. The house was quiet as we entered and charted up the long staircase in the direction of the left wing. Chris took my hand and pulled me along the way until we reached the last bedroom in the hall. Since they were expecting a ton of family to come in, all of the rooms had been made up. This particular one was my girlfriend’s favorite.
She tossed her bag down on the king-sized bed and turned to face me. “I’m goin’ to take a bubble bath.” She began to back away. “Do you want to join me?”
“Does your Gram know you’re here?”
“Yep. We have the whole wing to ourselves tonight.”
Knowing we’d be alone me feel better, so I followed her toward the master bathroom. She kissed me slowly when I caught up to her, leading us both onto the cold, ceramic tiled floor. “We don’t have to go all the way, Chris. I’m puttin’ it out there, so you know.”
“Take off my clothes,” she whispered against my lips.
I think this was the moment I knew she wasn’t going to back down. I felt her determination as our lips pressed together, and from years of being with this woman, I was sure she wasn’t going to tell me to stop.
Chapter 37
Christian
I could feel him entering the room behind me. His presence allowed me to stay motivated with my plans. First I lit a few candles, placing them around the tub. Then I set the temperature of the water and poured in a little bit of soap to create the bubbles.
That was the easy part. The next steps would require me to be confident. In my honest opinion this task would be harder than intercourse.
Even though he’d seen me naked a hundred times, I trembled at the thought of revealing myself to him. Within a few steps he was up against my body, his hands clenching the fabric to my shirt. My chest rose and fell rapidly as I anticipated it being lifted over my head. Ethan peered into my eyes, saying nothing when he raised it up over my breasts. Even with a bra on, my nipples were tingling. I couldn’t contain my heavy breathing.
When the shirt came off of my head completely I parted my lips, accepting another kiss from Ethan. The taste of his tongue lingered on my own when he pulled away.
It took me a second to open my eyes, even when I felt his hands reaching around my back. With little effort my bra strap was unfastened. Ethan kept his focus on me as he pulled it away to fall at our feet. I kept my hands at my sides, watching him step back and take me in. The way he made me feel was indescribable. It was so obvious that he was consumed by undressing me. The lump in his pants was only half the proof. His heavy eyes told me that he was high on the idea of continuing.
Very slowly Ethan crouched down and took hold of my pants. With a light tug they came down over my hips, sinking until they sat at my ankles. I stepped out of them while watching him looking up at me.
I expected him to remove my underwear quickly so that he could undress and join me in the tub, but Ethan wasn’t in a hurry. His eyes traveled down my body until he stared straight forward at my lace panties. I felt so warm, even with the cold tile beneath my feet.
The pressure of his initial touch between my legs almost made them buckle. It wasn’t only about the anticipation. My desire to make love to him, without regret, or worries, was causing me to shake profusely. I wasn’t afra
id, but more excited. I knew it was important to be able to let go and get lost in the moment. His touch only sparked a fire that I knew would burn all night long.
I watched Ethan’s face slip forward until he was only an inch away from my covered pussy. He teased the elastic that clung to my hips, only to let go again. His hot breath blew over the fabric, heating between my legs. His eyes, focused on mine, blinked slowly as he leaned forward to drag his bottom lip over me there. It was just a trace, nothing with enough force to cause a reaction. Still, I found myself craving for it to happen again.
Next Ethan pulled down my panties, revealing my sensitive sex. He leaned forward and kissed my pussy, only to stand up as my underwear fell to the floor. I watched my boyfriend ripping off his shirt, followed by his pants and boxers. For a few seconds I wondered if we were going to make it to the tub before he tried to touch me again. Just standing there, seeing him so hard because of me made me feel desirable.
Ethan grabbed my hand before slipping it down in the warm soapy water. I stepped in after him, appreciating the temperature and the fact that bubbles would prevent him from seeing any imperfections on my naked skin.
I knew it was silly. Besides my parents, this man had seen all of me. He’d seen me laugh, cry, and lose myself. Hiding from him only meant I wasn’t ready to accept what I couldn’t change. Knowing how important it was for me to change, I stood up from the bubbles and sat back down on the edge of the large soaking tub. My skin glistened as the remaining suds began to pop, exposing more of me for Ethan’s viewing pleasure.
He adjusted in the tub, slipping his wet hands up my legs. When he reached my knees he stopped, and I got an inkling that maybe he was worried about how far to go. “Don’t stop,” I whispered.
Ethan inched his way up to my thighs, all the while watching my reaction. It was apparent that he was prepared for me to stop him, in which I wasn’t going to. When he paused I used my toes to push him away, not because I was done, but for the purpose of grabbing his undivided attention.
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