Amish Days: A Desperate Act: An Amish Romance Short Story (Hollybrook Amish Romance)

by Brenda Maxfield

  Amish Days

  A Desperate Act

  An Amish Romance Short Story

  by Brenda Maxfield

  Copyright © 2015 Tica House Publishing All Rights Reserved. No part of this publication may be reproduced in any form or by any means, including scanning, photocopying, or otherwise without prior written permission of the copyright holder.

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  Table of Contents

  1. One

  2. Two

  3. Three

  4. Four

  One

  Fear thou not; for I [am] with thee: be not dismayed; for I [am] thy God: I will strengthen thee; yea, I will help thee; yea, I will uphold thee with the right hand of my righteousness.

  Isaiah 41:10 (King James Version)

  Josie hugged Emmy Sue to her chest and scurried down the road to the school. Her three sisters had tumbled into the house more than half an hour ago. As the teacher, John should have been home by now, too.

  Ahead, she saw the two-room school, standing tall and white against a backdrop of trees that exploded with a vibrant display of green in the late spring afternoon. Sitting on the porch holding his chin in his hands sat young Benji Crabill, his dark hair spilling over his forehead. He scraped his big toe over the dirt below him, stirring up a cloud of dust.

  “Benji?” she questioned as she neared the boy. “You okay?”

  He looked up at her, his wide eyes pools of sadness. Josie sank down onto the step beside him, and Emmy Sue reached over and slapped Benji’s head, gurgling and laughing.

  “Emmy Sue!” Josie scolded. She balanced the fourteen-month-old on her lap and grabbed the boppli’s chubby hands. “Don’t you be hitting on Benji.”

  Josie smiled an apology at the lad and raised her eyebrows. “You okay?” she asked again.

  “Fine,” he said as if forcing the word from his throat. “Just waitin’ for Mama.”

  “Was there difficulty in class today?”

  “Nee. Teacher wanted to talk to Mama is all. Don’t know why.”

  Josie twisted around and looked at the closed door of the school. “Is she in there?”

  “Jah.”

  Josie’s forehead crinkled. “You mean she’s in the school talking with Mr. Beiler?”

  Benji nodded.

  Without thinking, Josie stood and peered around to the window. She could see into John’s classroom and, sure enough, there stood Mrs. Crabill speaking with him. Benji’s mother was a small woman, thin and fragile, but she had a way about her, a soft attractive grace that drew a person. But what was she doing talking with John? It was odd that the two of them were in there alone.

  Josie’s face grew warm. Was she spying on her beau as if he couldn’t be trusted? She quickly backed away from the window, embarrassed at having looked in the first place.

  “I’m sure your mamm won’t be long,” she said, sitting down again with Benji. She gazed at his downcast demeanor and knew there was more to his state than impatience about waiting for his mother.

  He shifted and his wispy hair moved, revealing a bluish tinge behind his ear.

  “Benji!” she said, her voice full of concern. “Did you hurt yourself?”

  His hand jerked up and covered his ear. “I fell,” he murmured. “Hurt like thunder.”

  “Ach, I would think so! Can I have a better look?” She reached up to pull his hair to the side, but he wriggled away from her

  “No need,” he muttered.

  Josie stared at him. “But it’s better now?”

  Benji didn’t answer nor did he look at her. He’d always been a shy lad—she knew that from Sunday meetings, but Josie had watched him come alive under John’s teaching over the last school year. Seeing how he was back to his old ways, she felt a certain sadness.

  Josie wrestled with a very active Emmy Sue and then snuggled her close while she and Benji waited. What could they be talking about in there? And why was Benji excluded? Perhaps, John didn’t want to speak in front of the boy.

  But still … was it wise for a widower to be in there alone with a married woman?

  No one knew she and John were courting. Of course, her family had their suspicions, but they would never ask. It simply wasn’t the Amish way. Courtships were kept secret until the engagement was announced.

  She felt a dull anxiety run through her chest. John hadn’t yet proposed, so there might be no announcement in the fall. Yet she’d been taking care of his daughter for nearly nine months and they’d been courting for seven of those months. Wasn’t it time? What was holding him back?

  A wagon rumbled down the road, and she looked up to see Elder Dohner, who was the chairman of the Hollybrook School Board. He drew close, his eyes intent on both her, the baby and Benji, sitting there like lost puppies on the school porch. He stroked his beard and pulled to the side of the road.

  “G’day, Josie Bontrager. And isn’t that young Benjamin Crabill with you?”

  Josie stood. “Hello, Mr. Dohner. Isn’t it a lovely afternoon?”

  “What are you and the baby doing?” he asked, his usual stern tone resonating through the still air. “And Benjamin, you should be home by now.”

  Benji lowered his head.

  “What’s the matter, boy? Speak up.”

  “He’s visiting with me,” Josie interjected. “We’re having a right nice chat.”

  Josie felt a moment of guilt at her obvious exaggeration. Elder Dohner stared over her head toward the school, a frown creasing his wrinkled brow.

  “Do you always wait for Mr. Beiler after hours?” he asked Josie.

  “Um, no. Sometimes I do.”

  “Appears a bit unseemly, if you ask me.”

  Elder Dohner’s penchant for strict public behavior was known throughout the district, but Josie thought this was overboard, even for him.

  At that moment, the front door opened and Mrs. Crabill came out, followed by John. When John saw everyone there waiting, a look of alarm crossed his face, but he recovered quickly, giving a smile first to Josie and then to Mr. Dohner.

  "Why, hello,” he said with purposed calm. “It’s right nice to see you, Elder Dohner.” He reached over and took Emmy Sue from Josie’s arms.

  Emmy clapped her hands and said, “Dada” over and over, getting louder with each repetition.

  Josie forced a laugh. She patted Benji’s soft hair and said, “Nice to chat with you, Benji.” Another stab of guilt surged through her at her intentional misleading of the school board leader. She had no call to hide anything. Nor did anyone else.

  Did they?

  Mrs. Crabill nodded at Mr. Dohner and hustled Benjamin down the steps and to the road where they hurried north toward their farm.

  Josie stood awkwardly, her arms hanging absently without Emmy Sue to hold. John approached the wagon, carrying Emmy Sue easily in one arm.

  “Can I do something for you?” he asked the elder.

  Mr. Dohner shook his head, but his eyes held a guarded, almost accusatory look, and Josie recognized the warning. He never hesitated to make accusations. Once he had blamed a young teen of wrongdoing with a boy. She’d become so distraught that her parents had sent her off to kin in a neighboring community.

  “Well, then, I’ll see you soon,” John said, his shoulders straight. His face was clear, and Josie thought there was a hint of righteous indignation which she feared would
antagonize his superior. But, Mr. Dohner seemed not to notice, for he had already snapped the reins, and he was on his way back down the road, his old wagon rumbling and jouncing over the rutted shoulder.

  Josie’s eyes darted to John, but he avoided her look and started down the road himself. She scrambled to catch up, and after a minute of silence, he began talking about the new crops being planted and the pie her mamm had made for dinner the night before.

  Josie remained quiet, a thousand questions filling her mind. Weren’t they as good as engaged? And if so, why wasn’t he sharing about what had happened back at the school? Was there something to conceal? A niggling unease tugged at Josie’s mind, but she shoved it away.

  She loved the man striding next to her. He was kind and loyal and good. She had no business doubting his intentions or actions for even one second.

  ****

  The next afternoon, Josie sat on the porch of the big house playing patty-cake with Emmy Sue. Emmy’s blue eyes sparkled, and she giggled with glee as she slapped at Josie’s hands. Josie laughed along with her. Emmy had risen from her nap, eaten her snack, and had her diaper changed. Her flushed face wore a look of complete innocence and happiness and Josie reveled in it.

  She could hardly imagine her life before the new teacher John Beiler and his daughter Emmy Sue had come swooping in to capture her heart. She adored them both, and it seemed more and more that every minute of her day was consumed with thoughts of one or the other.

  “Roll ‘em up, roll ‘em up,” she intoned to Emmy, rolling her hands in an exaggerated manner. “And throw ‘em in the pan!” she finished off, lifting her hands in the air.

  Emmy gurgled and raised her dimpled arms to the sky.

  Josie gave her a resounding kiss on the cheek. Out of the corner of her eye, she noted someone walking by and recognized Amanda Crabill. She opened her mouth and was about to holler a greeting when Amanda gave her a furtive glance and then looked quickly away, head down, her heavy black shoes pounding the asphalt as if in a race to get away.

  Josie slumped back. Amanda had always been somewhat shy like her son Benji, but she’d never before flat out ignored her. What was going on?

  ****

  Josie’s three younger sisters flounced into the house, laughing and shoving each other, and complaining loudly about the quizzes they’d had in class that day.

  “Mr. Beiler didn’t warn us about that math test!” Lizzie said.

  “Did so. He put it on the board. Don’t you ever read the board?” Rachel scolded.

  “But we had a spelling test in my class,” Susie chimed in. “That’s harder than math!”

  “Hardly,” Lizzie said. She waved at Josie and walked over to tickle Emmy Sue under her chin. “How’s little Emmy?” she murmured, her voice rising in pitch. “How was your day? Was Josie good to you?”

  “Ach, Lizzie, the things you say. As if I’m not good to her,” said Josie.

  “Mr. Beiler is too hard,” Lizzie stated. “Can’t you talk to him?”

  “Me? What can I do?” Josie raised her hands in protest.

  “Plenty. He’s sweet on you, Josie. Everybody knows that.” Susie plopped onto the couch.

  “Susie!” Rachel said. “Hush yourself! We don’t talk of such things.”

  “Well, I do,” she answered stubbornly.

  “And take your books in to the kitchen table. You know Mamm will have a fit if she finds them dropped here in the front room.”

  As if summoned, Mamm came in from the kitchen, wiping her hands on a dish towel. “Girls, I’ve got some fresh snickerdoodles lying out on the counter if you each want one. And only one, mind you. Supper is coming right quick.” She eyed Susie’s books strewn over the floor. “Susanna Bontrager! Are these yours books?”

  Susie scrambled to pick them up. “Sorry, Mamm.”

  “Now have your cookie and then I need your help with setting the table. Rachel, I can use your help with the cold cut platter.”

  “Sure,” Rachel said, trotting off to get her cookie.

  Mamm observed Josie, and a shadow crossed her face. “Josie, girl, what’s the matter with you today?”

  Josie blanched. “What? Nothing, Mamm.” How did her mamm always know when something was bothering her—it was unnerving. And was it so obvious? Yet try as she might, she couldn’t shake the feeling that something was off between John and Amanda Crabill.

  Mamm walked over and laid her hand on her eldest daughter’s shoulder. “Whatever it is, take it to Gott. He knows all and will guide you.”

  Josie nodded. “Jah, Mamm. I’ll do that.”

  And she did—as soon as Mamm left the room. She hugged Emmy Sue close and sent up a prayer not only for wisdom for John but for help in whatever was going on with Amanda.

  In her heart of hearts, Josie hoped John was already using wisdom. For the hundredth time, she wondered what Elder Dohner thought when he saw John and Amanda emerge from the schoolhouse together. She had to confess that she hadn’t much faith in his thoughts. She only hoped it would cause John no harm. She stood and Emmy grabbed her little finger, and together, they went out to the front porch. Emmy toddled happily beside Josie on her pudgy bare feet.

  John was coming up the lane, and he raised his hand in a wave. Josie’s heart warmed at the sight of him. He looked tired, but his smile was bright. As he neared the porch, he reached toward Emmy Sue, and she trundled to the edge of the steps. Josie caught her just before she tumbled down head first.

  “Hold up, pumpkin!” she cried. “Your dat will come to you.”

  “Yes, your dat is coming to you, and he’s here!” John swooped Emmy into his arms. He gave his daughter a loud kiss on the cheek and then gazed at Josie. “How was she today?”

  “Perfect, like always,” Josie replied, straightening Emmy’s dress as John held her. “She’s getting very good at patty-cake.”

  John gazed at his daughter with affection. “Patty-cake, huh? Well, aren’t you growing up fast into a big girl?”

  Emmy jabbered with excitement, and Josie thought she detected the word patty-cake in the midst of her babble.

  John must have heard it, too. “Did you hear that? She said patty-cake!”

  Josie grinned. “Perhaps she did at that.”

  “She’s a brilliant one, aren’t you Emmy?” John kissed the top of her head and hitched her a bit higher against his side. “We’ll be out in the daadi haus. Thank you, Josie.” He walked back down the steps. “We’ll be in for supper later.”

  Josie nodded. That was all? No more small talk about the goings on of the day? Usually John stayed around for nigh on half an hour before retreating to the daadi haus. Was it her imagination or had he acted a bit distant? She shook her head. Nee, it was only her imagination running wild. That’s what came from idle thoughts. She sighed and went inside to help her mother with the food preparation, letting the screen door slam behind her.

  Supper that evening was quiet—even Susie seemed subdued. At the end of the meal, Dat surveyed his family. “Perhaps an early night for everyone, jah?” He reached over and tweaked Susie’s ponytail. “You all look to be mighty tuckered tonight.”

  Mamm smiled. “Seems so, Malachi.”

  “Let’s have family prayers early then, shall we? Say an hour earlier.” Dat stood and put his thumbs under his suspenders as he often did after eating. He pulled them out slightly and let them snap against his stomach, and then with a smile of satisfaction, he went into the front room.

  Josie got up to help clear the table. Her sisters pitched in while her brother Thomas joined Dat in the front room. John lifted Emmy from her high chair.

  “Thank you, Sarah, for the wonderful supper. I think Emmy Sue and I will go back to the daadi haus for the evening.” He smiled at Sarah and gave a nod to Josie. With that, he walked through the washroom and out the side door.

  Mamm’s forehead creased into a mesh of worry lines. “What ails the teacher?” She gave Josie a pointed look. “Did something happen?”

&
nbsp; “Why look at me?” Josie said with an edge in her tone. “I did my job today with Emmy Sue. That’s my only job.”

  Josie was mortified when the tense words sprang from her mouth. She stepped close to her mother and touched her arm. “Ach, Mamm. I’m sorry. No call for me to be rude.”

  Mamm patted her shoulder, but the worry didn’t leave her face. “We all have difficult days sometimes. Why don’t you go in and visit with Dat? Your sisters and I can finish the cleanup.”

  Josie’s shoulders drooped. “All right, Mamm,” she said, her voice contrite now. Shame burned through her heart at such behavior. If she was going to react strongly every time a bit of turbulence or confusion came her way, what kind of future could she look forward to? Besides, such conduct couldn’t possibly be pleasing to God.

  Instead of going in to visit with Dat, Josie went outside to the porch. In the growing darkness, she sat on a rocker and gazed over the fields. They stretched out before her, freshly plowed and newly planted. In the shadows, the long rows seemed to reach into infinity. She could almost feel the soft clumps of earth beneath her feet, with their promise of bounty for the next winter. She sighed and leaned her head against the back of the rocker. She pushed her bare foot gently against the porch boards, and the chair began moving with a gentle rhythm.

  Dear Gott, please forgive my impatience and rude tone. I guess I’m more bothered than I care to admit. Help me to trust You and to rest in Your arms of peace and love. And please, Gott, be with John and whatever he’s involved with.

  Josie rested her hands on the smooth arms of the rocker where the paint had long ago been worn away. Many had rubbed their hands on the wood, sitting there visiting, praying, or just plain resting. She’d spent numerous afternoons rocking Emmy Sue on this porch and in that very chair. They’d even bundled up on mild winter days to come out to rock together. Josie would sing close to Emmy’s ear until the little girl would fall asleep in her arms, her weight soft and heavy on Josie’s lap.

  How Josie loved her. How she wanted to officially be her mamm.