Ghostly (Darkly Devoted Book 1)

by Brooke Kennedy

  “No fucking way.”

  “Do you want to be stuck here forever?”

  He didn’t answer me, just pursed his lips as if I’d never said anything and continued to glare at Meredith.

  “Fine, don’t answer me, but I know the answer is no. She may have found us a way out of here. I can’t stand it here much longer. I’m losing my mind.”

  “I just found this the other day, so I will need a while to flip through it,” Meredith explained. She carefully moved over to where the book was without taking her eyes off Cade. “I’ve never cast a spell, so I will need to, like, practice…or something.”

  I nodded in agreement.

  “If I find something, I can just stop back by?”

  “Yeah, of course.”

  She reached down, picked up the book, and shoved it back into her bag. “I need something to take with me or your dad will think I lied about picking up something.”

  “Yeah, go for it.” I waved my arm around the room to show she could take anything.

  She reached over to my pile of books, picked a random one, and tucked it into her arm. As she walked towards the door, I could see the tears filling her eyes again. She glanced over at where I was and let out a loud sigh.

  Without another word, she ran back across the room and pulled me out of Cade’s arms and into hers. She held me tightly as she started to sob. I returned the hug and stroked her back as she continued to cry. I felt awful for inviting her over. Even if she was the one that might be able to help.

  Chapter Thirty-Five

  On Christmas day, I curled up in the living room with my blanket with my back pressed into the corner of the two walls. I wrapped my arms around my legs and rested my head on them. At the first sign of morning, I’d come down. Thankfully, Cade hadn’t followed. It was something I had to do by myself and without him to protect me. I had to find strength in myself again and stop relying on him so much.

  My brother’s stocking overflowed with toys. I added more wood to the fire, so it would be nice and warm when my family awoke. I was tempted to finish decorating the tree, but decided otherwise. That might be too much if they woke up to find it completed.

  Finally I heard the pitter patter of tiny feet running down the hallway, accompanied by my brothers frantic excitement. He rushed into the doorway, one hand flying up to cover his mouth and the other reaching out to point at the fireplace.

  “Daddy, Santa came! He came!”

  “Well, it looks like you must have been good after all,” my dad said as walked into the room behind Dillon.

  “Can I see what he got me?”

  “Of course.”

  He raced across the room and jumped up in an attempt to grab it. When he jumped the second time, he grabbed it and fell to the floor with the stocking in hand. He giggled as he peered into it. He was just a few feet away from me; close enough for me to smell the fresh scent of his bubble bath that still lingered on his skin from the night before.

  As he pulled out the contents of his stocking, I looked over at my dad. He sat on the edge of the couch and watched Dillon with a smile that only a father could give his children. There was no trace of that painful expression he’d worn for weeks now.

  He was moving on. Both of them were.

  Dillon tossed a ball to him, and he caught it. He smiled and threw it back.

  I wanted to help Dillon open his other gifts, eat lunch, and watch cheesy Christmas movies. I wanted to argue with my dad about how cliché Christmas was and demand him turn it off. I yearned for his insistence that I give in to the holiday spirit.

  The reality was that, dead or alive, I would have forever been tied to the house. From the moment I’d laid eyes on Cade that day in the basement, my fate was sealed. My heart recognized something in him that it hadn’t in anyone else before. His darkness and my light blended together to create something wonderful.

  I would have never left the house or the town. I would have never been able to find someone else that I was interested in. I would have always compared them to Cade and whatever it was that drew me to him like a moth to a flame. So close to the edge of danger, but never so protected and warm as before that first glimpse.

  There was no way things would change now. No reason to look back on the past. With him, I’d finally been able to fill the hole in my heart that my mother left. He would never replace her, but he’d made my heart hurt less.

  As I watched my family and reminisced one last time, I felt him watching. It was almost as if an invisible calm reached out to hold me and encourage me to breathe.

  Don’t cry. It’s okay. Everything is going to be okay.

  When my family moved into the kitchen, I followed them and watched them eat. My father talked about moving out of the house to get a fresh start. Dillon seemed to be open to the idea, ready and willing to make new friends. Dad was happy about that, and I could see that simple conversation was enough to make the difference. It helped him make the right decision for his son. He was going to put the house on the market.

  After they left to visit Carla’s house for dinner, I sat in front of the fireplace and watched the flames dance. Ryder would be there. I wondered how he was doing. I missed him. He’d been something special. He’d been someone who really understood me. He probably would have been the one to win my heart in the end if I had moved into a different home in the first place.

  But life had another plan for me, and I was forever going to be stuck in the house. My family was moving out, and I would never see them again. I closed my eyes and let the tears creep out from under my lashes. There was no use hiding them. I had spent the majority of my life hiding from my emotions until I’d met Cade. I retrieved my phone and earphones from the pocket of my hoodie and put on my favorite music. I let it consume me and take me to another place.

  When I felt the hand on my shoulder, I didn’t move, just ignored it and hoped they’d go away. The hand shook me, so I jerked my ear buds out and turned around.

  “What do you want?”

  I froze.

  The body on the other end of that hand was tall, lanky, and plaid in flannel. Ryder stared back at me through the brown hair falling into his eyes, concern plastered on his face.

  “Briar,” he whispered as if he wasn’t quite sure it was me.

  I wiped at my tears furiously and cursed myself for having my music up while I was out in the open where someone could see me. How had he gotten inside?

  “Why are you crying?” He leaned down in front of me and brushed my hair out of my face.

  I shook him off me. “How’d you get in here?”

  “Your dad must have forgotten to lock the door on his way out. Meredith told me that….that you were here, and I had to see for myself.”

  “Oh….”

  “Why are you crying?” he repeated.

  “I don’t know what you are talking about.”

  “Briar, I know you better than that.”

  Well, shit. He wasn’t going to give up so easily.

  “Dad and Dillon are moving out. I’m never going to see them again.”

  He reached out to take my hand and flinched slightly. He’d noticed the cold, the dead chill that erupted from my hand to his. Like it had from Cade to me when I’d been alive. I remembered my own shock at such a coldness.

  “Oh, I um, I’m sorry. Why are they leaving?”

  I gave a noncommittal shrug. “I don’t want to talk about it. What are you doing here?”

  “I just needed to see you. God, Briar, I don’t want to see you here like this. You’re so cold, so different.”

  I jerked my hand away from him and scowled. “I’m no different than when I was alive, just a little colder.”

  “Okay, okay, sorry. You don’t have to explain anything.” His hand cupped my jaw to make me look at him. He leaned in toward me and stopped inches away from my face. “Briar, I wish there was something I could have done.”

  Shaking my head, I raised my hand to his face. “Please don�
��t blame yourself. I hear enough of that. I’m trying to find a way to be happy again.”

  “I could buy the house. I could live here with you. We could be together.” His eyes searched my face for an answer.

  That wasn’t possible though. I loved Cade. He was my world. There wasn’t anything Ryder could do because it was too late.

  I shook my head. “I can’t let you do that. Cade’s here, Ryder. He’s dead too and I…I love him.”

  Ryder shook his head and closed the distance between us, pressing his lips to mine. I froze for a minute and then scrambled away from him. It caused him to fall backwards and knock us to the floor. I put my palms down to catch myself.

  “What the fuck is going on.” Cade’s voice filled the air behind me, and the entire room filled up with his emotions.

  I sprang to my feet and stepped in front of Ryder protectively. Cade stood in the doorway with anger plastered on his face.

  “It’s not what it looks like, chill out.”

  “I swear, Briar, this is the second time I’ve caught him with his hands all over you.”

  “Ryder, you need to leave.” I didn’t take my eyes off Cade. When I held out my hand, Ryder took it and stood up.

  “Listen, man, chill out like she said.”

  “Don’t you even talk to me.” Cade was suddenly right in front of us.

  I moved to put myself between them again. I laid my hands on Cade’s shoulders, but he pushed me off him and started to pace. Reaching behind me once again, I took a hold of Ryder’s arms and slowly led him towards the door. My heart thudded in my chest as I tried to keep him behind me.

  “Briar, stop,” Cade said

  He turned to watch us, but I continued to move towards the door.

  “No, I can’t. You need to calm down. Remember what we talked about?” I knew Cade wouldn’t hurt me, but I couldn’t take the chance he’d hurt Ryder. I had to save Cade from himself.

  “I said stop!” The lights flickered off and on.

  I grabbed the doorknob and threw open the door, shoving Ryder out of it.

  “Briar, I’m not leaving—”

  “Just go!”

  “Briar—”

  “Just get off the property please; we can talk later, just please.”

  He ran across the street, stupid me trying to follow him. I slammed into the barrier and fell to the ground. Ryder turned to look at me with shock on his face.

  I pulled myself to my feet and brushed off my clothes. He rushed back over to me and raised his hands in the hair. I mirrored them but wasn’t able to even move them past the boundary.

  “Please go,” I whispered.

  “I won’t let him hurt you.”

  “He can’t, Ryder. I’m dead, remember?” Sarcasm dripped from my words, and I instantly regretted it when his face fell.

  “I wish there was something I could do.”

  “There isn’t.”

  Ryder took my hand in his and stepped closer to me. “If I have any say so, you will be out of this house sooner rather than later.” He planted a soft kiss on my hand, and then he left.

  “What the hell was that about?” Cade demanded as he stepped up beside me.

  “He was just coming to see me. He was worried.”

  “You’re not his concern anymore, and he needs to keep his hands to himself if he wants to keep them.”

  I looked at him and crossed my arms. “I don’t see what the big deal is. I’m dead; he’s not. It doesn’t matter.”

  “I’m sorry, Briar. I just…I don’t want to lose you.” He pulled me into his arms and held me close.

  I was surprised at the quickness of his apology, but still unsure of what his intentions were. He was possessive, and it only seemed to be getting worse, especially now that we were both on the same side of the veil of death. If he hurt anyone that was important to me, I could never forgive him. I just hoped he understood that.

  Chapter Thirty-Six

  From the safety of the window, I waved goodbye to my family as they took the last bit of their belongings from the house and locked the door behind them. They couldn’t see me. I could never do that to them. If they knew I was still around, they would never leave.

  I hoped for a better future for them. One where my father was his happy-go-lucky self again. Maybe he could move on as if the house never existed. I didn’t even want him to come back and visit my grave. No one was there anyway.

  I hoped that Dillon would grow up and not forget me, that he would remember the good times before the house and losing Mom. Maybe someday he would have a family of his own and be successful. He deserved it.

  The tears slid down my face, slow but painful, as I watched them pull away. Dillon pressed his hand to the window and looked at the house until they were out of sight. I wondered what he was thinking, if he knew I was there.

  Cade’s hand was on my shoulder the moment I couldn’t see them anymore, but he didn’t say a word. I looked up at him with sadness, and he looked down at me with love and adoration, something that I was used to but not sure it was appropriate at that moment in time.

  The house objected to getting new owners, I felt it. Somehow it radiated off the walls and floors of the home. Whispers traveled throughout the large space, but there was no one there. Even with Cade’s touch, I felt sorrow. It was an uneasy feeling, and I couldn’t help but think we needed to do something.

  “Maybe it would be better if we burned down this place.”

  He shook his head. “We’ve talked about this.”

  “I know, but…I can’t help but think about what will happen to the next people that move in.”

  “Who cares? We have each other forever, and we don’t have to worry about anyone changing that.”

  “Life isn’t just about us, Cade,” I clarified.

  “We’re dead, Briar, just in case you forgot.”

  “But I still feel alive. Sure, I know I’m not. I know you’re not, but we still walk and talk, and I do what I did when I was alive. I still have a conscience, and I can’t help but think the town would be better without this house here.”

  He stepped away from me as if I had said something terrible. Shaking his head, he spoke in a low voice. “You can never say anything like that again.”

  I crossed my arms defensively. “I can say whatever I want. If I want to destroy this house so that others can be safe, I will.”

  The house groaned; the foundation began to shake. I had to reach out to the wall to steady myself. The lights flickered on and off as violent shakes continued to rack the house. The house was angry, at least that’s what it seemed, and I was terrified. Never had the place seemed more alive, and Cade seemed to be on its side.

  He pulled me to him and hid me in the fabric of his shirt. The harder the house shook, the harder he gripped me, until I could feel my skin bruise.

  “Cade,” I whispered as I clung to him, “what’s happening?”

  “The house wanted you, and now it has you. I’m afraid of what will happen if you defy it.”

  With one last groan, the house stopped making any noises.

  “Glad that’s over. You wanna go make some masks?”

  “Sure.” I nodded and pulled away from him. I ran my hand through my hair nervously. What was I going to do?

  Salvation came in the form of Meredith, who snuck over the next day with her witchcraft books. We sat side by side against the old tree in the field behind the house. The warmth of the sun reminded me of better days, even though I hadn’t been out in it much. Our voices were whispered as we huddled close together to keep our conversation as quiet as we could. The ghosts could come out there of course, but I felt like I would know if they did. My connection with the house ran deeper than I wanted it to. Feeling its emotions was the last straw. No matter what Cade said, I was going to figure out something.

  “Just try it.” Meredith peered at me with wide, excited eyes.

  “No, I don’t think so.”

  “Do. It.”


  “No, I’m not possessing you. Besides, I don’t even think that I can.”

  “I need to see if you can leave the property if you have a body.”

  “Meredith, I know you’re all about all this spell stuff, but it won’t be fair to you if I possess you and can’t get out.”

  She waved her hand in the air to shut me up. “You won’t get stuck.”

  “So, how the hell will I get back out of you?”

  “I’m sure you’ll figure it out. Even if you have to beat yourself out of me. I’m not worried about it. I trust you.”

  “I’m not possessing you, so you’ll just have to find another way to handle it.”

  “Fine, but don’t get mad at me if we have to take the hard route.”

  As Meredith continued to flip through the pages of her book, I rested my head against the tree and looked up at the sky. I closed my eyes and pretended I was alive. Birds chirped, the wind blew, and I could feel the sun’s rays on me. Whatever we needed to do, other than the possessing, I was game.

  “Alright, here we go. So, like, this sounds really hard. I’m not sure if we can find all the elements we need.”

  I opened my eyes to look at her. “What do we need?”

  She smiled nervously at me. “I don’t want to tell you. I’d really rather try these other things first. You know I’ve never done this before…”

  “If you’re scared, we can find someone else.”

  “No, I wanna help you with this. I don’t want to include anyone else.”

  Leaning over, I read aloud from the book, “‘When the veil between the worlds is thin, the one with the sight will open a portal to the otherworld. Only then will the evil be destroyed.’ Sounds brutal. Isn’t that Halloween though? We’ve already missed it.”

  “There’s more.” Meredith pointed to the writing at the bottom of the page. “‘This blood ritual has the potential for sacrifice. The bleeder must reign in their emotions or they will be taken back into the darkness.’ I don’t think this is a good idea.”