Lori knew what she wanted to hear. She wanted to hear Flynn say he was here for the long haul, that he wanted them to be a family in every sense of the word.
Though she’d just lied to him. No matter what happened between them she knew Flynn would be there for Adam from now on. She didn’t know if that picture included her and she needed to know for her sake, not Adam’s.
“I don’t know what you expect me to say.”
He took her hand and she wrenched it back, knowing his touch would distract her. If ever she needed to focus, it was now.
“I want the truth.”
She watched the shutters descend over his eyes, her hopes plummeting. She’d been a fool to read more into the time they’d spent together. Of course he’d invited her along to his dinners with Adam. What better way to ease into a relationship with his son than by having the mother along to smooth the way?
Instead of seeing those intimate evenings for what they were, the deepening bond between a man and his son, she’d read way too much into them and built a stupid happily-ever-after fantasy in her own head.
Flynn sighed and thrust his hands in his pockets. “The truth is I came here to open the training facility. I didn’t expect to see you again let alone discover we have a son. And now I know about Adam I fully intend to be a part of his life whether I’m here or not.”
But what about us? She wanted to scream. What about my life?
“For Adam’s sake, I think it’s vital we get along,” he said.
Get along?
She’d been dreaming of weddings and more children, he wanted to get along? So much for her one, big, happy family fantasy. Time to start living in the real world.
Pasting a bright smile on her face while her heart ached, she nodded. “I agree. It’s important we present a united front to Adam, as friends.”
As much as she wanted to hear him correct her, to say he wanted her as part of their family along with Adam, he didn’t.
And her heart broke all over again.
* * *
Lori was a sucker for a fairy tale. Always had been since the age of five when she’d picked up her first Cinderella picture book and succumbed to the make-believe world that promised a happy ending every time. Sadly, she’d been a hopeless romantic ever since.
So, despite her earlier conversation with Flynn in the foyer before the play, as soon as the curtains lifted and the actors began reciting their lines, the magic of theatre captured her in its spell. She laughed, she frowned, and shed a few tears as the story drew to a close, wishing she could stay in the darkened theatre holding Flynn’s hand forever.
He’d surprised her by reaching for her hand and intertwining his fingers with hers during the second act. Though his action probably had something to do with the sniffle she’d tried to hide as the heroine lost her heart to the hero rather than any romantic notion on his part.
As the lights came on, he turned to her with a smile. “Enjoy that?”
“Loved it,” she said, wondering if he remembered her passion for a good story, whether in written, screen or theatrical form.
“Thought you might.” He wiped away the remnant of a tear that had seeped from the corner of her eye. “Still a fan of this stuff?”
“That obvious, huh?”
He glanced down at their clasped hands and she wondered if she imagined the wistful expression that flitted across his face and vanished just as quickly.
“I remember the first movie we saw.”
She rolled her eyes. “Don’t remind me. You didn’t stop teasing me about it for a month afterward.”
“Hey, you weren’t to know they changed the program at the last minute. And I forgave you, remember?”
She smiled at the memory of attending the promised romantic comedy, which had turned out to be a children’s animated feature complete with talking trees and caterpillars.
Rather than walking out, Flynn had sat through it with her though she’d known he’d probably prefer to be anywhere else.
“Do you remember the rest of it?”
His eyes darkened as his gaze locked with hers. “Afterward, you mean?”
She nodded as the barely suppressed attraction between them flared to life with a mere glance. “I loved that old car of yours.”
“When I think of our time together after that cartoon, the car isn’t the first thing that springs to mind.” His grip on her hand tightened, his thumb brushing gently against the back of it.
Dry-mouthed, she saw his gaze drop to her lips and she knew exactly what part of that evening during their last term at high school he was thinking about. And four years later, the night before he left for the Middle East, when they’d returned for old time’s sake.
“I haven’t been to the Lookout since then.”
“Neither have I.” Right then, with the air fairly crackling with electricity between them, Lori knew they were delusional if they thought for one minute they could keep their relationship platonic.
Friends didn’t stare at each other with desire in their eyes.
Friends didn’t lean closer until their shoulders touched.
And friends sure didn’t look at each other’s lips like they’d seen a prize morsel they wanted to nibble.
“Time to go, folks.” An aging usher pointed toward the door and they leapt apart as if caught in the throes of passion rather than merely staring at each other.
“You young folk,” the old man muttered, shaking his head and shuffling away.
“I guess we better do as he says.” Flynn clasped her hand, all but dragging her toward the exit.
“Hey, wait up. I know you’re in a hurry to drop me home but this is ridiculous.” She smiled at the determined look on his face, wondering if his mind had drifted along similar lines to her own. And if so, ending this evening had suddenly become the last thing she wanted to do.
He slowed his pace and chuckled. “Sorry, I’m used to rushing around in the army. No time to dawdle, as my first sergeant used to say.”
“You love it, don’t you?”
She heard the pride in his voice whenever he spoke about his career yet wondered why he rarely discussed it with her. He’d divulged a few tidbits of information to Adam, who’d been thrilled to learn of his father’s exciting career but hadn’t been so forthcoming with her.
Not that she’d pushed him when a huge part of her didn’t want to acknowledge the fact his career would probably drive them apart in the end.
“Defending my country seemed the right choice back then. And it hasn’t steered me wrong.” He released her hand as they reached the car and turned to face her. “A lot of things have come and gone in my life but the army has been the one constant. That’s why I want to run this training school for recruits. Hopefully, I can give a little bit back to a career that’s given me everything.”
She respected his loyalty but where did his zeal leave her and Adam? Was there room in his life for emotional commitment to anything other than his job?
“How long will you run the school for?”
There, she’d asked the million-dollar question that had been plaguing her. The more time they spent together, the closer she came to giving this man her heart again and this time she wanted forever, not a fleeting taste of happiness. He wanted to be friends, she wanted to be a heck of a lot more and one of them wouldn’t get what they wanted.
He didn’t reply until they’d both got into the car and he’d started the engine.
“I don’t know. The army hasn’t given me any indication how long this posting will last.”
Flynn hoped his answer would suffice. He wasn’t ready to tell Lori the truth yet, for he knew she’d read more into it.
“So your time here is just a posting?”
Damn, he could even hear the hope in her voice, tugging at his conscience.
“Yeah. I have no idea when I’ll be moving on.” He focused on the road, tired of lying to her yet knowing it was vital to protect him—and her.
&nb
sp; The plan he’d devised needed a lot of variables to align to work, so no way in hell would he mention any of it to her until he had confirmation.
“In that case, we better make the most of the time we’ve got.”
Though she cast him a dazzling smile, he saw right through it. She’d always used that fake smile whenever she wasn’t happy about something. He’d seen it when her high school had lost the debating championships to his and he’d seen it when he’d asked her wallflower friend to have a dance—at her urging—at the graduation ball. Both times, she’d later admitted how unhappy she’d been and he’d cheered her up with a kiss.
A kiss...
“I agree. Let’s make every minute count.” He turned off the main road and headed along the Yarra River, hoping she would be just as keen to check out the view again.
CHAPTER NINE
Lori knew where Flynn was headed the minute he turned onto the gravel road twisting alongside the Yarra River that led to the Lookout. Though his casual words about leaving had struck with a vengeance she determinedly ignored her misgivings and focused on this moment: this night, with this man.
“This isn’t the way to my house,” she said, feigning ignorance while her pulse hummed in her veins, excitement building with every curve in the road.
“A fact we’re both well aware of.” His low chuckles filled the car, warming her with their familiarity.
“Whatever you have in mind, Flynn Logan, I’m not that sort of girl.”
She wondered if he’d remember the words she’d uttered all those years ago. Sitting here with him now it felt like only yesterday. Who knew where they’d be if she’d followed him to the ends of the earth, married him as she’d hoped, become an army wife?
Perhaps they’d be driving up here to celebrate their sixth wedding anniversary rather than hoping to resurrect old times better left in the past?
“What sort of girl is that?”
Like that night long ago, his response came back lightning-fast.
“You know.”
“No, I don’t, but I’m hoping you’ll show me.”
She whacked him playfully on the arm. “You’re entering dangerous territory. The last time we said those words look what happened.”
“Yeah, look what happened...” he trailed off as he stopped the car and switched off the engine, turning to face her with a huge, proud grin. “We made out, headed back to my place and created a son. I’ll never regret that.”
“Me either,” she murmured, entranced by his tender expression as the moon drifted out from behind a cloud and briefly illuminated his face.
“Though I take it you’re not hoping for a repeat performance tonight?” She tried to lighten the moment before she threw herself into his arms and started blubbering like the romantic fool she was.
“I came here for the view but if you had something else in mind...”
He lightly ran a fingertip down her cheek, his cheeky smile telling her exactly why he’d come up here and it sure as hell had nothing to do with the view.
“You’re not looking at the view.” Her breath hitched as his finger drifted across her lips, tracing their outline with infinite slowness.
“From where I’m sitting, it’s spectacular.”
Though her common sense warned her to stay calm, remain objective, think friends, she’d known this moment was inevitable the minute he’d driven up here. And like all those years ago his hypnotic gaze drew her toward him, powerless to resist.
She leaned forward and cupped his cheek with her hand, enjoying the faint rasp of stubble against her palm. “In that case, don’t just sit there admiring it.”
He remained silent for a moment before reaching for her, his low groan of resignation the sweetest sound she’d ever heard.
She met him half way, their kiss a fiery crush of lips and tongue that made her moan with the sensuality of it. They’d shared so many kisses in the past yet the memory of what rocked her world the most was burned into her brain.
She craved the earth-shattering experience of sex with Flynn.
His hands skimmed her bare shoulders, caressed her back and finally touched her breasts. Searing heat shot through her, leaving her pliant and yearning. She shivered with years of pent-up need, wanting him with a ferocity that terrified.
“You’re driving me crazy,” he whispered as he buried his face in the crook of her neck and nuzzled her.
“That’s the general idea,” she managed to respond as his thumbs stroked her nipples through her dress. Desire streaked through her body, pooling low.
“What happened to the proviso of remaining friends?” He dropped light kisses down her neck before lingering on the swell of her breasts, his mouth hot and urgent on her skin.
She arched against him, fiddling with the buttons on his shirt. She had too much bare skin; he didn’t have enough, a fact she intended to remedy right now.
“Aren’t rules meant to be broken?” She hit pay dirt as her hands slid beneath the crisp white cotton of his shirt and encountered warm, hard muscle that rippled beneath her exploring fingertips.
She dipped her head and planted an open-mouthed kiss on his chest, inhaling the heady combination of soap and pure Flynn.
Flynn gritted his teeth at the touch of Lori’s lips on his skin. Hell, he would like nothing better than to haul her across the car, push her dress up and bury himself in her. His body burned with wanting her and her passionate responses fueled his need until he couldn’t think straight.
However, in his world rules were not made to be broken. In fact, rules were the one thing that kept him focused on the task at hand and if he had any chance of winning Lori’s respect, he had to play by the rules he’d set down in his own game plan.
Otherwise, he’d end up ruining both their lives.
Taking hold of her upper arms, he gently pushed her away, one of the hardest things he’d ever had to do. He’d survived recruit training, he’d survived a stint in Papua New Guinea, and he’d even survived a wayward shot from one of his own men, but nothing prepared him for the devastation in her eyes as she registered his rejection.
“We can’t do this,” he said, reaching to tuck a stray curl behind her ear.
“Don’t.” She twisted away from him and looked out the passenger window, folding her arms across her chest where minutes before his lips had tasted the intoxicating sweetness of her skin.
He took a steadying breath, trying to get his breathing under control and tried again. “Lori, the timing’s all wrong. I—”
“Guess our timing was always wrong. Either you’re not interested in me anymore or you’re playing some weird tease and retreat game.” Her voice choked off, leaving him wanting to thump something. “Just take me home.”
What a frigging mess. He’d hoped to cheer her up by bringing her to the Lookout yet all he’d succeeded in doing was making her more miserable.
Way to go, soldier.
Perhaps it was time to retreat behind the lines to regroup and plan a new attack?
“If that’s what you want. But I’m not playing a game. Far from it.” He started the engine, casting a final look at the river that wound through the darkness to the horizon.
Lori was wrong.
He was interested, very interested, and this time he intended to play for keeps.
* * *
“I could kill him.” Lori took a particularly vicious swipe at the cobwebs in the corner of her kitchen with a broom. “A long, painful death involving plenty of torture.”
“Nasty.” Jane sat back, popped the tab on a soda and raised the can in a mock toast. “Can I watch?”
Lori propped the broom against the island bench and wiped the perspiration from her brow. “I’m so over this.”
Jane smiled. “Come on, sweetie, lighten up. All this anxiety isn’t good for my health.”
“You should’ve bloody heard him.” Lori fetched a soda from the refrigerator and joined Jane at the table. “After all we’ve been through, he sit
s there with this serious expression on his face and says ‘I’m not playing a game.’ Jeez.”
Lori shook her head, swiping curls out of her eyes. “He says we should renew our relationship for Adam’s sake and then he takes me up to the Lookout. What did the dufus expect to happen—”
“Whoa. Back up.” Jane straightened in her chair. “You didn’t tell me all this took place at the Lookout?”
Jane puckered up and made smooching sounds.
Lori rolled her eyes. “Give it a rest. If I wanted grief I’d spend the day with Flynn rather than you.”
Lori drained her drink, wondering what the man in question was doing right at this moment. She hadn’t seen him much over the last week. He’d been picking Adam up from school and spending some one-on-one time with his son, dropping him home before bedtime. They’d exchanged a few polite words on the doorstep each night and despite an overwhelming urge to invite him in for coffee she’d resisted, determined to hold him at arm’s length until she sorted out her feelings.
Not that she was in any doubt about how she felt since the night at the theatre.
She’d fallen for Flynn.
Again.
And she had no freaking idea what to do about it.
She’d shown him how she felt by her passionate responses to his overtures—and he’d turned her down. Her ego had taken a battering and she would respond with aloofness, until he came begging for more. Nice in theory, hopefully the practice wouldn’t be too difficult.
“What are you going to do?”
Lori shrugged. “Beats me. How do you drum sense into a guy who’s as confused as I am?”
“You’re not confused, you’re in love.”
Jane pronounced it like a fact, one that Lori couldn’t deny.
“Remind me again why I invited you here?” Lori started rearranging the salt and pepper shakers, the serviette holder, and anything else within reach.
Jane smirked. “You’re fiddling, which means it’s worse than I thought. You’re not just in love, you’re head over heels.”
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