Bend To His Will
Page 9
He watched his brother, sister and mother leave.
He and his father stood at the entrance to the ranch. In the last few minutes Neal had gone from feeling like scum to shit. He wasn’t fit to clean the mud off Sandy’s shoes let alone try to make peace with.
“What’s gotten into you?”
“I’m scared,” he admitted. Many years had passed since he’d opened up to his father. Being the oldest of six children, he hated taking time away from the others. He liked being the one his parents could talk to.
“What are you scared of?”
“Wanting something I can’t have. What if I push her too hard and she leaves me?” Neal didn’t even know he felt this insecure until he spoke the truth to the one man who wouldn’t judge him.
“Has Sandy given you any cause to think she’d leave?”
He shook his head. Sandy had done nothing but open her arms to him. Even though he’d shot her down, time and time again.
“Neal, there’s a woman in town who wants to be with you. She doesn’t see anything but the love she has for you.”
“I know.”
“Do you? Really?”
“Yes.”
“Then I think you need to think real hard about what you want. A woman like that won’t take your shit forever. Either put your heart on the line and be prepared to get stung or rot in your own little cell and spend the rest of your life wondering what could have been.”
As pep talks went, it was powerful.
“What do you think I should do?” Neal asked.
“You’re thirty-five years old son. Figure it out. Until you do, get off my fucking property.”
His dad walked away.
Neal went to his truck. He needed to clear his head. The old man was right—being at the ranch would only cause more problems. Driving home, he thought about what his dad said.
Spending the rest of his life possessed by what could have been wouldn’t be a welcoming way to think of the future.
When he thought about the future, he saw Sandy. She was his everything.
He pulled up outside his house, walked around to the back and let himself into the kitchen. After he pulled his dirty boots off, he stripped down to his underwear. Moving to his bathroom, he glanced in the mirror, then winced. The left side of his face already looked like someone used it for a punching bag.
Every bruise he deserved.
Cleaning himself up gave him time to think about what to do. Going to her right now would be a mistake. He’d allow his bruises to heal, then ask for a second chance.
He poured hot water into the sink and washed the dirt away.
How quickly his life had changed.
Chapter Fifteen
Neal gave Sandy a week before he ventured into town because the next day his bruises were worse than the day before. He didn’t want her to see what happened. She’d only worry. He went to the salon but she wasn’t there. Neal drove to her house. She stood on the front porch ordering men around. He saw her furniture being moved and his heart skipped a beat. Was she leaving town?
“Yeah, take that to the secondhand store. They could use it. Excellent, thank you,” Sandy said to one of the men.
“What’s going on?” Neal asked. He leaned against the door post. She spun around to face him. He didn’t like what he saw. Her pale, smooth complexion looked worn and tired. She’d lost weight and considering only a week had passed it was a shock.
“What the fuck do you want?” she asked. He noted she didn’t stop to talk to him. She gathered boxes before brushing past him to her car.
“I came by to see you.”
“Then hurry up. I’ve got places to be, people to meet.”
“Where are you going?”
“I’m leaving.”
“For how long?”
“Forever. This is the type of trip you don’t come back from,” she said with a calm voice.
“What the hell?”
“What’s the matter, Neal? Don’t like the fact you can’t control me?” she taunted.
The box she carried was placed in the back seat.
“Why are you leaving?”
“No reason for me to stay. I’m moving on. I’ve signed over my share of the salon. There is nothing for me here.”
She brushed her hands together while walking past him.
“Sandy, don’t do this,” he said.
“Do what? Move on. You’ve done nothing but treated me like shit. I’ve had enough. This is my fighting back. Get lost, Haney.” She’d never used his last name.
“Does Luke know about this?”
“No. I’m seeing him later.”
Stunned, he watched the men move stuff from her house as she packed the car.
“How can you make a decision like this without talking it through with anyone?” he asked.
“I did. I talked to my sister a few times.”
“Which one, the ice queen?” Neal couldn’t believe this. The woman finally has him where she wants him and she decides to leave,
“She’s not like that. What happened to your face?”
At least she’d looked at him long enough to notice. “I walked into my brother’s fist.”
She nodded her head, then continued with her chores. Neal followed behind her wondering what he could say to get her to stop.
“Don’t you think we should talk about this?” he asked, though he couldn’t think of what to say to prevent this.
“What’s to talk about? I’m tired of leading the same old life. After what you said, I decided leaving would be for the best. They can go to the recycle place,” she said that last to one of the men.
“This is a rash decision.”
“No. This is the right decision.” She moved to her kitchen and began packing away the saucepans.
“Where are you keeping this stuff? You can’t drive and store most of your home,” he pointed out.
“No. I’m taking the barest of essentials with me. The rest is going into storage.”
Neal tried to stop her at every turn. Watching her walk around him as if he didn’t exist hurt him deep.
“Can we just talk?” he asked.
“You’re talking.” She brushed past him. Irritated beyond reason, he reached out, grabbed her arm and pushed her up against the nearest wall. “What are you doing?”
“I need you to stop for a fucking second. You’re leaving me. Leaving us.”
“You made it perfectly clear there is no us. Now there is just a me and a you. I’m taking me far away.”
“Sandy, don’t pretend nothing happened between us. I was there. You were mine,” he said softly. Having her in his arms felt so right. Her scent surrounded him. He realized in that instant he’d come home.
He leaned closer, heard the hitch in her throat.
“I was never yours. You had me for as long as you wanted. Then threw me away.”
The tears in her eyes broke his heart. He’d been the cause of her pain. “Don’t cry, baby. I’ll make everything better. I promise.”
“Until when? Until you start thinking clearly again? I can’t live my life wondering when you’ll leave, Neal.”
“I’m not leaving you. I swear. I love you,” he confessed. Saying the words lifted a weight off his shoulders. If he had to he’d tie her to his fucking bed and keep her there until she submitted to him.
“No you don’t,” she said.
“Feel this.” He pressed her hand to his heart. “You’re the only woman I ever want.”
His free hand cupped the back of her head. Crushing her against him, he took her lips. Tasting her and loving her. Their moans of pleasure mingled, he knew in those seconds Sandy was his woman to keep for a lifetime.
She gave him everything so easy. Her love, body and trust. He wanted to hear her say the words. To tell him she loved him.
“I love you, Sandy,” he said. Hoping she’d say the words back to him.
For a few minutes she was his. Her submission was his for the takin
g.
“I can’t do this.” She pushed him away. “When we were dating, you didn’t care about my feelings. Why mention of love all the sudden?”
“I don’t want to lose you.”
“What happens when another man puts his hands on me?” she asked.
Instant jealousy rushed through him like an enormous wave. He stood frozen. Not knowing what to do.
“No one will touch you but me.”
“You can’t control everything. You can’t bend people to your will, Neal. I’d rather be alone than scared of what you might do or say if another man comes near me.”
“Sandy, don’t make me do this. Don’t make me beg.”
“Why not? You’ve made me beg at every opportunity.” She stormed past him. Neal followed, grabbing her arm. “Stay the fuck away from me,” she shouted in his face, yanking out of his grip.
Neal followed her. He watched her run out on the road. His heart stopped as a car sped toward her too fast.
“Sandy, move,” he yelled.
Too late. The person driving the car didn’t have enough time to stop. The woman he loved was thrown through the air and landed on the cement street. He ran to her side. She wasn’t awake.
“Call an ambulance.”
“I’m so sorry. She came out of nowhere. I didn’t see her,” the woman from the car said.
Nothing mattered but the lifeless body of the woman he’d treated like shit. What happened if she didn’t wake up?
His heart pounding and hands shaking, he grabbed his mobile. After several attempts he called his family. Rory turned up with the ambulance. He watched as Sandy got strapped up and sent with the paramedics. Being no relation, he had to follow behind.
Chapter Sixteen
Neal finally reached his parents on the way to the hospital. Luke was on his way and would see if any of her family cared to make an appearance. When he arrived, the nurses placed him in the waiting room. No one would talk to him.
Half an hour later, Luke walked in the front doors with her sister, Natalie. He stood as the two walk toward him.
Natalie looked pale and shaken. Luke didn’t look much better.
“How is she?” Natalie asked.
“I’m hoping you can tell me. They won’t speak to anyone but her family. Her next of kin happens to be Luke.” He stared at his brother and wondered why he hadn’t known about Sandy’s medical changes.
“She wouldn’t trust any of her family with her health. I can understand why she’d choose her best friend. I’ll go see if I can find a doctor.”
He watched her walk away before turning his glare on his brother.
“You’re my woman’s next of kin?”
“It was something she asked me to do when she turned twenty-one. Something her family had said worried her. I asked her to find someone else. She refused,” Luke explained.
The first thing he would be changing is the next of kin status. If she didn’t want any of her family to be there, then he’d be the one responsible for her life.
“What happened?” Luke asked.
“We were fighting. She ran out into the road. A car was coming and knocked her down.”
He saw in his mind the way she went down. The way she didn’t respond to being called.
Natalie returned with a shake of the head. “No news at the moment. I’ll be the first one to know.”
“I’m going to get myself a coffee. Do any of you two want one?” Luke asked.
“A black coffee with no sugar would be good.”
Neal was left alone with the ice queen. He sat down in the waiting room and placed his head in his hands. Thinking would be the only way to get through this.
“She’ll be all right,” Natalie said.
“How do you know?”
“She’s a strong woman.”
“How would you know when none of you paid attention to her?” He watched her wince and hated himself for the words. “I’m sorry. That was uncalled for.”
“You’re only speaking the truth. Not really your business but you care for her so I’ll accept.”
She really was a snobby bitch. Not his problem though.
Luke returned with the coffee. Rory stopped by, along with the rest of the family to offer their support. About three hours later the doctor walked out.
“How is she?” Natalie asked.
“Fine. The bang to the head caused a little concern but she’s awake and alert. We’re going to keep her twenty-four hours for observation. Besides a broken leg and some scrapes she’s doing fine. The driver mustn’t have been going fast. She’s lucky,” he said.
“Can we see her?”
“She’s asking to see Luke Haney.”
Neal’s heart sank. He watched his brother leave. Luke would see the woman he loved before he got a chance to make sure she was okay. His life was going to hell in a handbasket.
He sat down and waited. The only thing he could do.
* * * *
Sandy sat up in the bed staring at her plastered leg. The plan to move had just taken a drastic turn. She wouldn’t be driving with a broken leg when she struggled to move.
Someone knocked at her door. She glanced up and smiled. Luke stood on the other side. He opened the door, then walked over to her.
“You’ve been doing battle again.”
“I think considering my opponent was a car I did really well. I’m still alive.”
“And driving a man crazy with worry,” Luke said making her smile falter.
“Has he been out there long?”
“Long enough to start wearing out the tile on the floor but he’s holding himself together.”
She felt guilty for not asking to see him sooner. “They need some paperwork signed. I don’t have the head to be thinking about it.”
“You didn’t change your next of kin?”
“If you don’t want to, I’ll take them with me.”
“Don’t stress about it, I’ll sort through the paperwork. In the mean time, you’ve got to talk to Neal. He’s worried about you. This isn’t good for either of you.”
“I don’t know what to say to him,” she said.
“He’s still the guy you love. Neal is strange. He cares in his own way. Trust me when I say he loves you.”
Luke kissed her on the head before he moved out. She didn’t have time to even look in the mirror before Neal stood in the doorway.
Her throat tightened up. He looked good no matter what he wore. She licked her lips and turned away.
“Hi,” he said.
“Hi.”
The only sound in the room was of his footsteps.
“You scared me.”
“I scared myself. I don’t know why I ran into the middle of the road.” The bed shifted. He sat down beside her.
“It was my fault. I shouldn’t have grabbed you. I scared you.”
Her heart melted at the concern for her in his eyes.
“Don’t blame yourself. This wasn’t all your fault. I’m to blame as well.”
“We’ve made a mess of this,” he said.
Sandy smiled and placed a hand to her head as a pain shot through her skull.
“What’s the matter?” he asked.
“The pain medication hasn’t reached every part of me yet.”
“My family stopped by.”
A groan escaped her. She reached for a pillow to lie across her front. “I hope I didn’t scare them.”
“Only the way you did me.”
She smiled.
“I want to talk to you about what I said.”
“You don’t need to explain yourself.”
“Yes. I do.” He took hold of her hand. From the small connection she felt a current pass through them—like they were both charged to be together.
Something that was far stronger, working to keep them together.
“I shouldn’t have said those things. I don’t think of you that way, Sandy. When that guy put his hands on you, I saw red. I shouldn’t have taken
it out on you. I love you.”
He said the words with such ease, Sandy began to believe him.
“Okay, I’ll forgive you.”
“Great. I’ll take you back to my place as soon as you get discharged. I’ll take care of you.”
“Whoa, wait a minute. I said I forgive you. That doesn’t mean we’re getting back together,” she said.
You want him, honey. Stop trying to fool anyone else. You love him. You want to kiss him and have all his babies.
“I’m taking care of you, Sandy. You’re mine.”
“I got ran over by a car, Neal. That doesn’t mean you have to take care of me. In fact I don’t want you fucking near me. Leave,” she shouted, pointing at the door. She feared she’d give in at a moment’s notice. For too long she’d wanted this man and now he wanted her. The world had a nasty way of biting you in the ass with too many gifts.
“I’m here to help you. There is no way you’re going to be able to look after yourself with a broken leg. You’ve also banged your head real good. The doctors want you here for observation. After you’re released, I’ll take care of you at my home. Not to mention the fact you’ve sold your house,” Neal said.
“There are other people who can look after me. People who love and care for me.”
“I love and care about you. Do you want me to phone your mom or dad?”
Of all the things she wanted to hear, his feelings weren’t one of them. “No. You don’t love me. You made that abundantly clear.”
“When I was an asshole. I love you, Sandy. When I’m done you’re going to believe it too.”
He left before she had chance to argue. The doctors thought it a brilliant idea. His family sided with their son.
The following day, he stood behind her wheelchair and then helped her into the car. Even though a part of her wanted to shout about the unfairness of it all, another small part was positively preening in her chair. The man she loved had gone from a jealous nut into a perfect, caring boyfriend.
At times, she missed the jealous nut.
Chapter Seventeen
Sandy lay in Neal’s bed with her breakfast to the side. She’d been in his house as a guest for a week and couldn’t find a single fault. His attitude toward her had changed completely. She stared at the ceiling, wrestling with herself. Her life would be a lot easier if she could hate him.