by S. E. Law
“I appreciate it,” I manage in a steady voice. “But I do need to work, and I think Saucy Nights could be really successful. I’m ready to be a businesswoman,” I say point blank. “Do you think you could make your investment by the end of the week?”
He lets a sharp breath, his eyes gleaming. It’s dark in the restaurant, so I can’t exactly make out his expression, but the hard line of his jaw tells me that something’s off. I cock my head sideways, making a face of playful frustration.
“What are you thinking?”
To my surprise, he answers immediately.
“I’m thinking that I’m still sampling the goods,” he growls in a deep, rough voice. “I need to know exactly what Saucy Nights will offer its customers before I make a significant investment.”
Immediately, my hopes are dashed. He’s not ready, and I was silly to even bring it up.
“Oh, I see,” I say in a soft voice.
Damon lifts my chin so that my eyes meet his, and I can’t hide my disappointment.
“Just one more taste,” he growls roughly again. “And maybe then, I’ll be willing to put money into the deal.”
I smile, but my heart’s not in it, even as he leans forward to kiss me again. After all, my situation is becoming clear. I thought of Damon as a potential business partner. I thought of my demanding alpha male as an astute businessman with the know-how and the means to jumpstart my business.
But now, I realize that Damon’s not serious about either me or Saucy Nights. He merely wants to have fun. He wants to enjoy my body, and to dabble with a sweet, innocent girl while it lasts. But when it comes to real commitment, it’s clear that nothing will happen on either the business or pleasure fronts.
8
Rose
Work has been better lately. I haven’t told Damon that I started seeing other men again, but I don’t really feel like I have an option. After all, he’s not going to invest in Saucy Nights. He wants to play with me, and to sate himself using my curves, but this isn’t a long-term thing. As a result, I need to take care of myself, and that means resuming my duties as an escort.
At first, it was hard. It was difficult to even get dressed for my dates, much less look the men in the eye and smile. But I’ve gotten used to it. After all, Damon’s not going to be with me forever, and I won’t be able to depend on the stipend he’s been depositing in my bank account each month. As a result, a girl’s got to take care of herself, and for me, that means seeing clients once more.
Don’t get me wrong, the work still sucks for the most part. For example, my date tonight was mediocre. The guy was pretty nice, but unfortunately, quite whiny. Eric is an accountant who works upwards of seventy hours a week, which blows me away. How anyone can stare at numbers on a computer screen that long is beyond me, but he does it. Maybe that’s why he’s pasty and doughy, with Coke-bottle glasses and a cowlick that sticks straight up from the back of his head.
Even worse, Eric wanted to complain too. He says he has emotional and physical needs to be met, but he doesn’t have the time to put himself towards finding someone to take care of those needs for him. He tells me it wouldn’t be fair to drag a girl into a relationship when he already has such a hectic work life.
I get it, and it makes sense in a way. We hear this in our industry a lot, and I think he’s doing the right thing to hire a girl through an escort service who won’t have expectations. This way, he’ll be able to have the girlfriend experience, without actually having to commit more than a few hours of his time.
But he left disappointed because I didn’t fulfill Eric’s physical needs tonight. If he’d booked me a few months back, maybe I would have. After all, he’s kind of handsome despite the bad clothes, and seems harmless. But I don’t engage in any sexual activity with my clients now that I’m with Damon. Even if there are no long-term prospects in my personal life, it still wouldn’t feel right.
After the date, I returned back home to my own apartment, feeling a bit morose. It was dark and gloomy, and exhausted, I flipped on the light switch, revealing my shabby little place with the raggedy afghan tossed over my couch. I smiled ruefully. Over the last several months I’ve been staying primarily at Damon’s place, but on the nights that I work, I obviously come back to my own apartment. I don’t want him to know that I’ve been escorting again, even if there’s no physical contact.
But it’s not just that. I’ve been feeling sick the last couple of days and I don’t want my gorgeous man to see me green and sweaty. This morning it was even worse. I was at Damon’s apartment and woke up about an hour before him, nausea rising in my stomach. I bolted out of bed and ran like a jackrabbit to a bathroom down the hall, bile tickling the back of my throat. Even though Damon has an adjoining en suite, I didn’t want him to hear me yakking.
Then, I took a long, hot shower after to try to settle myself down. I rubbed a sudsy loofah along every curve of my body, and then gargled with mouthwash three times after brushing my teeth twice. I didn’t want Damon to notice that anything was wrong.
But in my heart of hearts, I know what’s happening because my breasts have been tender and I’ve had the strangest food cravings, like oatmeal with chicken tenders. When was my last period? Too long ago.
As a result, I stopped at a drugstore on my way home from my date tonight. Now, I have the plastic bag in my hand, and I make my way to my bathroom. Turning on the light, I look at myself. Ugh, my skin looks pasty under the fluorescence, and my make-up far too garish, but this isn’t the time to worry about appearances. I have much more important duties to attend to.
Quickly, I pee on the test and then place it on the countertop, pacing the small bathroom. Oh god, oh god. What’s going to happen?
Nervous, I decide to draw myself a bath. The water gushes into the tub while I pull my clothes off and then step in. Meanwhile, the pregnancy stick sits on the ledge of the tub, taunting me. The test must be done now, but I can’t look. What will I do if it says that I’m pregnant?
I lay back in the hot water, eyes closed and absolutely terrified. My heart is pounding in my chest, and a sweat breaks out on my forehead. I can’t hear, and even my vision seems a bit fuzzy. Oh god, what’s happening to me?
As the water starts to grow cold, I realize I can’t put it off forever. I open my eyes and step out of the tub, careful not to peek at the answer on the test. I dry off and wrap a towel around me, securing the terry fabric securely about my breasts. Then, I take a deep breath, and look.
I’m pregnant.
For a moment, I’m ecstatic. I’m having Damon’s baby! I’ve fallen for this man, and carrying the handsome architect’s child is a dream come true. I’m ready to start a life and a family with him. I know it’s want I want, and I have never desired anything more.
But the problem is that clearly, this isn’t what he wants. After all, if he were serious, we would have told Lucy already. He would be introducing me to the world as his girlfriend, instead of carrying on this clandestine relationship. Not only that, but he never made the investment in my business that I requested. Saucy Nights is still no closer to getting off the ground, and if anything, at this point, I have to be real: he’s not going to provide any start-up capital. Damon doesn’t believe in me, nor in my idea. I’m just a fun time to the gorgeous alpha male.
My stomach drops because the truth stings. As much as it hurts, Damon looks down on me because of my job. While it’s okay to have a fling, he’d never consider marrying me or having children with me. He doesn’t want anything to do with my business even, much less creating a family.
With tears on my eyes, I look down and caress my stomach. Maybe the father doesn’t want this child, but with a rush, suddenly, I know that I want this baby. He or she was conceived in love, and while unexpected, I’m going to keep him. I whisper to my burgeoning bump, tears running down my cheeks.
“I love you sweetheart, and I promise that Mommy will take care of you no matter what.”
9
R
ose
Two months later.
It’s been two months since I found out I’m pregnant, and I live at home with my parents in Duluth, Minnesota now. It was easier to escape New York that I thought it would be. I told Damon that I was going to visit my parents for a while, and he accepted it, more or less.
“When will I see you again?” he asked, dropping a kiss on my nose.
I smiled brightly, even if inside, I knew this was our final goodbye.
“Oh soon!” I trilled. “My mom, Mildred, is a little ill, so it might be a longer stay, but I promise I’ll be back as soon as I’m able.”
Damon merely nodded and bent his head to suck on my nipple as I gasped and tossed beneath him. Our loving that night was especially heated, since it was going to be the last time for a while. Damon took me three times, and he seemed to come especially hard that final moment while looking deep into my eyes. But that’s all I have now: memories with my man, and it may have to last me for a lifetime.
After all, I’ve established a new life here. After I arrived on my parents’ doorstep, Mildred and Matthew were surprised to see me, but they understood. I fed them some bullshit about New York wearing me down and about feeling exhausted around the clock, and they patted my back soothingly.
“You’ll always have a place with us, sweetheart,” my mom murmured. “Do you want to bake some cookies together tomorrow?”
“In fact, your old bedroom is just the way you left it,” my dad added jovially while pouring some coffee. “Nothing’s changed!”
At that, I wanted to laugh and cry simultaneously. After all, now I’m sitting in my childhood bedroom, and it’s true, nothing’s changed. The walls are still a yellowish-green from when I went through my emo phase, and there are posters of Alexander Skarsgard in all his bare-chested glory hung up on the walls. My old teddy bear, Mr. Munch, looks at me with a smile from my tie-dye coverlet.
“Hey Munch,” I murmur while rubbing my hand over my small belly. “Are you ready to be a big brother?”
After all, I haven’t told my parents that I’m expecting. I keep meaning to, but Mildred and Matthew are so innocent in their own way. They must have had sex a long time ago to conceive me, but sometimes, I wonder. Between the garden club, the bridge club, and Wheel of Fortune every night, my parents are just too insulated to understand that their daughter was cruelly used by a handsome older man, and that he’s left me pregnant along the way.
But that’s the thing. I miss Damon desperately. Even if he is an evil ogre, I lie awake nights, craving his strong arms. I wish I were in his bed, cuddled against that hard, muscular form. I wish he’d kiss me awake between my legs, and then ravish me until I’m pregnant all over again.
That thought brings me back to reality with a jolt. I’m expecting, single, and I don’t have a job. As a result, I looked up an escort service here in Duluth. It’s not what I want to do, but I have to support myself. I can’t live with my parents forever, and even more, this baby needs food, clothing, formula, high chairs, and a million other things.
Only one escort service popped up in the search results, and it’s called Small Town Sassies, which I guess makes sense since Duluth is tiny compared to NYC. To my relief, they didn’t even have me come in for an interview. The woman merely took my contact info, said my pictures were fine, and set me up on a date for tonight. As a result, I’m going out with a client at 8 p.m., and even though my heart feels full of dread, I steel myself. I have to do what’s right for my child.
Slowly, I pull on a tight wrap dress. My belly is only bulging a bit right now, but it looks okay. The wrap dress ties around my waist, and thankfully my breasts are bigger than ever, and my hips wide and sassy. Hopefully my client doesn’t notice the pooch to my stomach. Then, I do my hair and make-up, outlining my lips in a vibrant red. I look beautiful, even if my eyes have no sparkle to them whatsoever.
When I wander downstairs, both my parents look up.
“You look very formal tonight, honey,” Mildred says with confusion in her voice. “Weren’t you going to go bowling with your old high school friend, Elaine?”
“Oh right,” I laugh, looking down at my feet in the high stilettos. “Well, I’m still meeting up with Elaine, but we’re not bowling anymore. We’re going to the movies!”
Mildred looks astonished.
“Dressed up the way you are?”
“Yep!” I lie through my teeth, my cheeks hurting from smiling so hard. “I have all these clothes from New York, so I figured I’d wear them! I don’t want to waste them!”
“Okay, honey,” my mom says dubiously. “Have a nice time then.” My dad merely peers at me from over his paper, and then goes back to reading.
With that, I grab my purse and head out. But I’m not going to the movie theater. Instead, I head to a nearby Sheraton, where I’m meeting “Jack” for a drink.
To my surprise, Jack is no country bumpkin. He’s surprisingly attractive, with black hair and blue eyes, even if he’s short. In my heels, Jack and I are probably the same height.
“Hell-oooo!” he greets, jumping off a bar stool to greet me while pressing a kiss to my cheek. “I had no idea Duluth had such beautiful women!”
“Oh, are you in town for business?” I chirp while taking a seat, arranging myself carefully. Of course, I see how Jack eyes my big breasts and tiny waist. His fingers are practically itching to pay the bill and get me upstairs, but what he doesn’t realize is that I’m not going to put out.
“I am from out of town,” he chortles, sitting back in his own seat. “Chicago, actually. But I’m in pharmaceutical sales, and Minnesota’s part of my catchment area. If you need some Botox, then I’m your man!” he crows. “Seriously, can I get the name of your doctor?” he asks. “The more connections I make in Duluth, the better.”
I smile, even though it comes out a bit frozen.
“No, I don’t have a doctor yet because I just moved here myself,” I say. “But Botox is so popular! How do you like what you do?”
That sets him off on a long spiel. Jack tells me his entire life story, starting from when he was a baby in diapers. He recounts every aspect of his life in agonizing detail, including the time he was put on academic suspension while in college, as well as the year his fraternity hazed a freshman so hard that the poor boy had to go to the hospital. All of this makes me sick, to be honest, but I make myself nod and smile. It’s just part of the job.
Unfortunately, Jack gets to drinking, and before I know it, he’s had far too much alcohol. His voice is a bit inebriated as he stands, wobbling a bit. He yawns and stretches his arms over his head, revealing a swath of pale belly beneath his shirt.
“Well now, pretty baby, why don’t we go upstairs?” comes his slurred voice.
I shake my head.
“Oh no, I’m good,” I murmur. “Besides, you’ve had a lot. Why don’t you call it an early night? You mentioned that you have a sales appointment tomorrow first thing. It’s important to be at your best!”
But to my surprise, Jack takes my elbow in his hand and pinches it so hard that I gasp. Before I can speak, he’s escorted me out of the bar and has me in the elevator going up to his room.
“Sweetheart, you’ll love this,” he slurs, pulling out a keycard to unlock his hotel room door. Then, like the drunk he is, he drops it on the ground. I sense the opportunity to get away, and jerk my body in the other direction, but that sets him off. Enraged, the small man seizes me around the waist, drags me back over to his room, and hurls me inside before slamming the door behind us.
“Shut the fuck up,” he snarls before I even open my mouth. “I paid for this, and you’re going to fucking deliver, sweetheart.”
Oh my god, this is my worst nightmare come true. I’m stuck in a hotel room, against my will, in a city that I don’t know with an inebriated client. I fumble for my purse, hoping to get to my phone, but he rips the leather clutch out of my hands.
“Like I said,” he leers, his breath stinking of vodka
. “I already paid for this, so you might as well spread your legs.”
I scream, but Jack is an animal. He’s lost all ability to think rationally, and he spins me around roughly before pushing me onto the bed. I fall onto the mattress face first and shriek again, but it’s too late. He’s already tying my hands to each bedpost so that I’m bound and stuck.
“Help!” I scream. “Let me go!”
But then, a gag is placed over my mouth, cutting off my plea. My nightmare just took a turn for the worse, and now, I’m only hoping for survival. Why did I ever leave Damon? Why did I ever leave New York, and the comforts of everything I know? After all, I’m a single mom, but there are many single mothers in the world, and they make things work. They don’t become escorts out of desperation.
As tears course down my cheeks, I try to block everything out: the way Jack is ripping my clothes from my body, and the way he runs his drunken paws up and down my curves. There’s the tell-tale buzz of his zipper coming down, and I let out another muffled scream of distress, my body tensing in painful anticipation. I can’t be here. This can’t be happening to me. I’m a pregnant woman about to be assaulted, and in the moment of my greatest need, the man I love is nowhere to be found.
10
Damon
Where the fuck is she? Where is Rose? Oh god, I hope I’m not too late.
My feet pound up the hotel stairs. The elevator is as slow as molasses, and the bartender just told me that Rose went upstairs with a man. Oh god, oh god. Is this really happening?
But unfortunately, it is. Rose left to visit her parents two months ago, and at first, everything was fine. I suspected nothing. She’d mentioned something about her mother being sick, so it was understandable. My girlfriend wanted to be with her family during their time of need.