For Better or For Worse (Wedding Vows)

by LeAnn Robinson

  CHAPTER 27

  Things just kept getting worse, like Jason was losing control of himself. How could those fears possibly be so strong?

  How could they be keeping him away from the family he loved?

  Well, he wasn’t certain what he felt about little Ace. He should love the little guy, should feel a special bond to him. This child was going to continue Jason’s male line, his name, his good looks and good fortune. This child should be terribly important to Jason.

  His feelings just didn’t make any sense.

  And their strength was… unbelievable. Off the charts. And stupid as hell.

  Because he knew that Ace would never love his father. Jason was, at heart, an unlovable person. Even a totally dependent baby would be repulsed.

  He closed his eyes, then went over his thoughts again. Diane had told him she loved him, once. While she was half asleep. Probably thinking about someone else. No, she didn’t love him.

  And his father didn’t love him. He didn’t know how hard Jason had tried to please him. He didn’t know how much Jason loved him, and how it hurt when he disappointed the old man.

  It wasn’t fair.

  He sat on his lumpy couch, arms resting on his knees, slumped over, trying to make sense of everything. Then there was a knock at the door.

  He raised his head. There wasn’t anyone in the neighborhood he knew, so who would be knocking? Maybe it was someone begging for money. Or ready to rob him.

  One thing he knew it wouldn’t be was another summons. He’d already gotten one of those.

  He opened the door, and a uniformed officer stood before him, a thick stack of folded paper in his left hand. “Jason Talbot?”

  “Oh, damn.” He reached out his hand.

  Back inside, he opened the document and scanned it. All the nasty boiler plate about him not caring about his family was there. A bunch of accusations that were so patently false, he wasn’t sure how Diane could have come up with it all.

  And then there was the requests for child support and alimony. It almost covered the entire amount his father supplied him.

  And she was asking for him to have no visiting rights.

  How could she be doing this? They hadn’t even resolved the custody battle with his dad.

  The thought of the old man suddenly angered him. What a bastard. All of this was his fault. The whole set up, the anger and the arguments, and all the fear. Hell, his dad should be drawn and quartered.

  He grabbed his phone and called the old man. Had to go through the secretary, since Carl had his calls screened, even this late at night. But soon, he had his dad on the line.

  “What is it this time? You needing more money?”

  “You call off the custody suit, now.”

  “Don’t threaten me, young man. I can withdraw all your support and make your life hell.”

  Like he hadn’t already? “That’s a laugh.”

  “You know it’s true.”

  “I don’t need you anymore.”

  “Come on! You’re so clueless you can’t even tell when you’ve—”

  “Withdraw the suit, or you’ll get a counter-suit for damages, pain and suffering, harassment, and anything else I can think of to throw at you.”

  “What is the matter with you? Don’t you have any respect for your elders?”

  “Respect is a two-way street. You haven’t earned mine, nor have you ever given me any.”

  “Respect has to be earned.”

  “A child deserves to be respected as a human being.”

  “Like the way you respected Ace?”

  “I’m about to fix that.”

  “You can’t fix anything.”

  “You just wait. And now you need to do what I told you. I’m not going to put up with your shit anymore.”

  “Jason!”

  “Good-bye.” Jason pressed the end call button, then let out an astonished breath, almost a laugh. He had just told his dad off. No, better than that, he had stood up to the man, and told him what he thought of him. Suddenly, he realized, nothing the old man could say would affect him anymore.

  The summons spread on his rickety coffee table looking like two people had been fighting over it.

  And that was his problem. He hadn’t been fighting hard enough.

  ✽✽✽

  Diane stood over Ace’s crib, smiling down at the sleeping baby. She loved him so much. She would simply die if she lost him.

  “I’ll fight for you,” she whispered to her son. “I’ll never give you up.”

  Even if it meant she had to leave the state, or even the country. If she had to take on a new identity, go to a place where Carl could never find her, give up her career, her future, everything she had. But she would not let that awful old man do to Ace what he had done to Jason.

  The doorbell rang.

  Who would be coming over this late at night? Henry was off, so she was the one who would have to find out. But with caution. She walked into the library, where she could see the front yard, and the old car parked there. It had to be Jason.

  She rushed down the stairs, flung the door open, and then stepped back. What did he want? Would he freak out if she threw herself into his arms?

  “Jason,” she said, breathless from the hurry to get here. “Um, come in. What can I help you with?”

  He stepped in, strangely tall and erect. “You need to call off the divorce.”

  Her eyelids fluttered, as though he’d just blown into her eyes. “Excuse me?”

  “I know you don’t love me, but I’m willing to do whatever it takes to make this work.”

  “What?” She almost laughed. “Jason, for crying out loud, you’re the one who left me.”

  “That’s all in the past now. I’m back. To stay.”

  Words stuck in her throat. None of this made any sense. “Are you on drugs?”

  His brow creased, hard. “I didn’t even take any of the anti-anxiety meds the psychiatrist gave me.”

  “Wow.”

  “You don’t believe me?”

  “This is just so… so unexpected.”

  “Yeah. Well, your summons got my attention.”

  “You said that’s what you wanted.”

  His eyes flitted back and forth, as though he was recalling the conversation they had in the car. Then he shook his head. “I don’t think I answered your question.”

  “Um, maybe. I don’t remember.”

  He shifted his weight, shoulders moving under his jacket like he was trying to adjust the fit of his clothing.

  “Why don’t we have a seat in the living room?”

  He nodded, and in a moment they were seated across from each other in a cozy conversation group.

  “Can I get you something to drink?” she said.

  “I… I’m fine.”

  Not getting more comfortable.

  Then, she remembered something. “Wait a minute. Did you just say you know I don’t love you?”

  He nodded, face tense, mouth puckered like he’d just bitten into a sour Skittles but was trying not to show it.

  “You didn’t listen to my message?” Her voice had gone soft, and she hoped he heard that.

  He fisted his fingers around the phone. “I was so certain you were going to tell me not to come back.”

  “Oh, Jason, I could never do that.”

  His eyes filled with moisture. “You mean that?”

  “I love you.”

  His face contorted as he tried not to burst into tears. And then he threw himself at her, arms wide, lifting her to a standing position and hugging her tightly, like he would never let go. “Oh, Diane, I love you so much.”

  She hugged him back, rubbing his back gently. Then she lifted her leg, her knee coming up to touch the outside of his thigh and stroke it softly.

  He pulled back just slightly, but damn if he didn’t look pleased. “Are you trying to seduce me?”

  She giggled. “Maybe.” Her knee went higher.

  Then he grabbed her
under the knees and swept her into his arms, heading for the stairs, and the bedroom just down the hall.

  And then he stopped. “First, though, there’s something I need to do.”

  “What?” she said, letting herself back down to the floor.

  “Can you take me to see Ace?”

  Right now, her heart seemed to fill the entire entryway. She couldn’t love Jason more. “Sure. But don’t take things too fast.”

  He smiled, red showing on his cheeks. “I think I got this.”

  When they got to his room, Ace was sleeping. “He’s getting close to sleeping through the night,” she whispered.

  Jason grabbed the side of the crib and gazed at the tiny form laying so quietly. Jason’s eyes sparkled. He bit his lip, but quickly let it go. “Can I pick him up?” His words came out soft and hesitant.

  “Better wait until morning.” She didn’t want him to freak out.

  “Or maybe when he wakes up for his next feed.”

  “You’re sure?”

  His grin turned lustful. “It’s something I’d like to see.”

  She gave him a playful swat, then backed away. His grin lit up his face, and he pretended to chase her, all the way to the bedroom.

  Once she arrived, she jumped onto the bed, then spread herself out, legs open and inviting, while he stood by the mattress, pulling off his shirt.

  Her phone rang.

  “Oh, damn,” she said, grabbing it from the nightstand. “It’s your dad.”

  “Ignore it.”

  “I don’t know if I dare.” She glanced toward Ace’s bedroom.

  Jason nodded. “Of course.”

  She took a deep breath before she answered it. One had to build up their courage before dealing with this man. “Hello.”

  “What did you do to Jason?” he demanded.

  “Excuse me? What are you talking about?”

  “If you think I’ll respond to him trying to intimidate me, you are sadly mistaken, young lady.”

  Her heart seemed to expand, to fill her whole chest. Sounded like Jason was facing all his demons at once. It took a lot of courage to do that. She put a light tone to her voice. “Frankly, I don’t know what you’re talking about.”

  “You put him up to that. I know you.”

  “I don’t think you know anybody.”

  Jason held out his hand, asking for the phone.

  “Hang on a minute,” she said. “Someone wants to talk to you.” She turned over the phone.

  Jason grinned as he brought it to his ear. “Dad? I don’t want you calling Diane anymore.”

  “What are you doing there?”

  “I live here.”

  “No you… what do you mean?”

  “I mean if you keep making these unpleasant phone calls, I’m going to get a restraining order.”

  “You can’t do that!”

  “I have a lot better case than you do. So think about it. Okay?”

  “Listen here, young man—”

  “Oh, that reminds me of one other thing.” Jason’s grin got bigger. “Stop sending me money.”

  “What?”

  “And don’t send any to Diane, either.”

  “What?”

  “Thank you, and good-bye.” He ended the call.

  Diane laughed. “Oh, I wish I could see his face.”

  Jason threw himself on the bed beside her and snuggled up to her, arms snaking around her hips. “I don’t.”

  She laughed even harder, rolling her back and head onto the mattress. “What do you think he’ll do?”

  “With him, I never know.” He scooted up to the head of the bed, where he could kiss her on the shoulder and the neck. Then he pretended to munch on her jaw.

  “Jason?”

  He sat up on an elbow. Evidently, he’d heard the worry in her voice. “Yeah?”

  “What will we do if he does stop sending money?”

  He laid back down, looking defeated. “I’ve gone over the numbers, and if we combine our income from investments, I think we can make it.”

  “Really?”

  “It’ll be tight.” He let out a loud breath. “Maybe I shouldn’t have told him not to send you anything.”

  She laughed. “Yeah. Now we’ll only see him money when he…” She stopped. That didn’t sound right, sounded more like they were vultures, circling over the old man, ready to swoop in and take everything he’d had.

  “He’ll probably change his will to give everything he owns to charity. Or he’ll create a big foundation to support nature programs on PBS.”

  “So, every time we watch them, we can be upset.”

  “But then again,” Jason said with a chuckle, “he could keep sending money just to defy me.”

  She laughed. “I wouldn’t put it past him.” A quiet moment passed, and then she ran her fingers through his hair. “You know what?”

  “Mm? What?”

  “I don’t want to talk about him anymore.”

  Jason grinned. “Good idea.” And with that, he rolled toward her, running his hands over her breasts, dropping his mouth onto hers.

  CHAPTER 28

  “Henry,” Jason said as he sat down to a bowl of cereal and milk for breakfast.

  “How can I be of assistance?”

  “Can you call the former members of our staff and find out if they’ve found new employment? And if they haven’t, tell them the job has re-opened here.”

  Henry’s face lit up. “With pleasure, sir.” He hurried to the office.

  Now, Jason was grinning as well. Not the easy grin he used to charm people, but the smile that came from making someone else happy. He couldn’t remember having that feeling before. Time to change that, do more good things, delight people in his life.

  He took his first bite of the frosted rice puffs, certain he liked chef’s breakfast offerings a lot better. And that was the first employee he was hoping would return.

  Diane peaked her head into the room. “You ready?”

  Jason gulped. “I just started eating.”

  She sat down in front of him. “Take your time. I think we’ll be here all day.”

  He took another bite, but now his hand was shaking. Damn it, this couldn’t be happening. He needed to get the whole thing over with, before he had another case of running away.

  His hand tightened around the spoon handle, as his stomach rose and fell like it was riding ocean waves in a storm.

  He set the spoon down and rose. “Let’s do it now.”

  Diane reached her hand out and laid it on his. “I’ve been doing some research,” she said, “and I think I have a theory.”

  He sunk back into his chair. “Is it bad?”

  She chuckled. “It might help you understand.”

  “Yeah. Maybe.” God, would she just get it over with? The longer he waited, the worse the anticipation.

  “You have an attachment style they call ‘avoidant.’ It’s why you were never interested in getting married, why you always had one-night stands.”

  “Avoidant.”

  “Yeah. Because your experience tells you that anyone you want to get close to will hurt you.”

  Oh, man, there was that feeling again, that vibration that told him she was on the right track. And then he understood it all. “Because of my dad.”

  She smiled, and now it was the kindest, most gentle smile he’d ever seen on anyone. “You wanted so badly to please him.”

  “And I never could.”

  “It’s also why you find eye contact difficult.”

  He swallowed. “I do?”

  Now her head bobbed up and down. “When you look at me, you most often gaze at my mouth, or my chin.”

  Damn, he was doing it even now. He moved his line of vision, to where her beautiful eyes were. Now why the hell was that so hard?

  “Don’t push yourself,” she said. “You can work on it with your counselor.”

  “No, I can do it.” As long as he pushed his feelings down, he was okay.

/>   “I love you,” she said.

  And she said it with her eyes, her mouth… it was like her spirit enlarged and encompassed him in a giant hug. “I love you, too.”

  “Come on, then.”

  “Yeah.” He quickly rose and followed her up the stairs. When they walked into Ace’s room, he was on his nanny’s lap, holding up his head, mouth hanging open, drool creating a long line from his lower lip almost to his knee.

  “Oh, my goodness,” Diane said with a laugh and grabbed a cloth from a nearby shelf.

  “Oh!” the nanny said, taking the rag and wiping Ace’s mouth. Then she gave Jason an apologetic shrug. “Babies do that a lot. They haven’t learned how to control—”

  “No problem,” he said, holding up his hand.

  As soon as he spoke, Ace turned to look at him, big brown eyes sparkling, curious.

  Diane sidled up to Jason and took his hand. “We can come back later, if you want.”

  “No,” he said. He had to do this now, while he still had the courage to face those awful fears. Even though he now understood them, it wouldn’t be easy. He began a silent chant. You are not my father. You are not my father.

  He reached out his arms.

  Then Ace grinned.

  “Oh, my gosh!” Diane said as Jason lifted the baby into his arms. “That was his first social smile.”

  “It was?”

  “I think he really likes you.”

  Jason returned the grin, all his fears gone in a quick flash. “And I like you, too,” he said, lightly pressing the baby’s nose with the tip of his finger.

  And Diane was grinning, too. Damn, life couldn’t get any better than this.

  Then Diane’s phone rang. She absently pulled the phone from her pocket, still grinning until the caller’s identity popped up. Then her smile evaporated.

  “Who is it?” Jason said. “Dad?”

  “I looked that upset, huh?” She answered the phone. “What is it this time?”

  Jason watched her face as she listened to his Dad on the other end. As the man talked, her expression softened.

  “I see,” she said. “Yes, I will.”

  In a moment, she hung up.

  “What did he say?”

  “He called off the suit.”

  Jason swallowed hard. “You’re sure?”