by Claire Adams
My fault for letting him wear me down, I guess. I waited. It was one twenty when he finally walked into the lobby. I stood, seeing him. He came up to me with a smirk on his face.
"Ready?" he asked. I rolled my eyes and started walking towards the elevator. He followed close behind me. He hit the button to take us up, and he made the smart choice to shut the fuck up while we went. His room was on the twentieth floor. He unlocked it and led the way inside. It was nice. Hotels usually were, but I guess I hadn't stayed in many here in L.A. It was spacious, the bed was king sized, and there was a large television mounted on the wall. Nice as it was, I wasn't pleased to be there.
"Did you want to wait ten, fifteen more minutes to show up? I would have been gone by then," I said to him.
"Were you waiting long?" he asked, distractedly, taking his jacket off.
"Why would you ask me to see you now if you knew you were busy?" I demanded. "I don't know about you, but I have things to do."
"If you didn't want to come, why did you say yes?" he challenged, taking his tie off.
"Because I knew you'd bother me until I did. This isn't like the old days, Jason. I'm here because I choose to be, not because I have to be, even though you're making me question why I even bothered." He came up to me.
"Thank you for coming," he said. His hand came up and tucked some stray hairs back behind my ear. Then he cupped my face and leaned in to kiss me. I jerked back, shocked.
"Jason—"
"Goddammit, Shel," he said, running his thumbs over my cheeks. "I can't believe how much I missed you."
"Stop it," I said, moving his hands. My face flushed; I was responding to him. I crossed my arms, walking over to the window. There had been something there that night last year. I wasn't going to try to deny that. Maybe it had always been there, the whole time we had known each other, and we would have acted on it sooner or later if I hadn't ended up leaving. I could feel it then; my pulse quickened, and an ache started in my core. I felt his hands on my shoulders, squeezing slightly before they slid down my arms. I sighed when I felt his lips on the back of my neck. He kissed below my ear, wrapping his hands around my waist.
"Shelby," he whispered. My eyes fluttered shut as he nipped and sucked the soft skin of my neck. His body was pressed up against my back, and I could feel just how much he had missed me. When had it gotten to this point with us? Were we just picking up where we had left off? That had to be it. There had to be a reason why I wanted him, even though he drove me crazy. I turned so we were facing each other and took his hand off my waist.
"This isn't the reason why you wanted me to come see you."
"It's obviously why you agreed to come," he said, pulling me back into him.
"You don't know the first thing about me," I said, defensively.
"I know what you want," he countered. He tried to kiss me again, and I backed away. "Come on, Shel; no one's here but me. Who are you trying to hide it from?" I scoffed, furious at him.
"Hiding?" I said, walking back up to him. I was just under six foot in heels, but I still had to look up to look at his face. "We don't talk for a year, and you think you still have any right to touch me?"
"If I don't, then leave," he challenged. His face was strained and his shoulders stiff. I swallowed, looking into his green eyes. They burned with lust. He wanted me. I lurched forward, holding his face as I kissed him. He grabbed the back of my neck, his other hand wrapping around my waist. It sunk, sliding down my ass. I let go of him, unbuttoning my pencil skirt and sliding it off, down my hips. My blouse came up over my head. He watched me strip, undoing the buttons of his shirt.
"Get on the bed," he said, taking his shirt off. I knew what he looked like shirtless; there were pictures online, but he had never taken his clothes off in front of me. His chest was dusted with blond hair that thinned into a trail over his chiseled abdomen and disappeared under his pants. I went over to the bed, letting my heels fall onto the floor as I crawled on. I sat, watching him as he freed his cock and jerked it up and down in his hand. It was massive, rock solid and shiny with precum right at the tip. He came up to me on the bed, kissing me roughly and tugging my panties off.
"Get on your stomach," he instructed. I turned, lying face down on the bed. He slapped my ass, leaving a slight sting. He climbed onto the bed between my legs, grabbing my hips and pulling them up so my ass was in the air. He entered me in one smooth, hard thrust. I gasped, fisting the bedcover. Grunting, he withdrew then sunk into me. I felt him deep, my lips stretching around his considerable girth. He palmed my ass, fucking me hard and fast.
I squeezed my eyes shut, biting my lip. Davis was no slouch in the bedroom, he never left me wanting more, but Jason was... it was different with him. Whatever it was between us was more raw, angrier, and more powerful. He made me impulsive and needy. When I craved him, I felt like I'd explode if he didn't give me what I wanted. Sparks flew when I was with Davis, but Jason set me on fire.
I moaned shamelessly, not caring who heard us. I should have known that I wouldn't have been able to resist him if we ever saw each other again. His weight on my body, his hardness, and girth inside me sent pleasure pulsing through my body. His hands would leave marks, he was holding me so tight. He gripped my ass, parting my cheeks. I squealed, feeling him tease my rosebud, already sure that I was going to burst.
I slid a hand under me between my legs. I massaged my clitoris, and that was all it took. I muffled my scream and shocks took over my body. My whole body clenched, then I felt the delicious sensation of release. Jason swore and grunted, pulling out of me and spilling his load onto my lower back. I lay on the bed, catching my breath. He rolled off of me, onto his back on the bed.
His eyes were closed, and he panted slightly. His dick was softening between his legs, and his whole body had lost the tenseness it had had before. I remembered what I had said to him in the control room a year ago and felt like an idiot. Why had I been so bent on never letting him touch me again? I hadn't really gone back on my word though if I had said what I had said thinking I'd never see him again. I could never have seen myself naked with him, in a hotel room no less, after leaving the night of the Christmas party a year ago. Right when I thought things would finally calm down and I could catch up to all the changes, he had shown up and turned everything upside down again. I got up silently, grabbing my panties and going to the bathroom.
I cleaned up quickly under the shower and checked my makeup. My lipstick was history, but I could worry about touching up later. I needed to get back to work. Some lunch date this had been. I put my panties on and came out of the bathroom; he was still on the bed, sitting up. He hadn't stripped completely during the sex, so he was still half dressed. His hair was a little messed up, but he didn't look like he had just had a dirty quickie with a former co-worker; only I did. I picked my blouse off the floor and slipped it back on, doing my best to smooth the wrinkles out.
"You're leaving?" he asked. I pulled my skirt up to my hips, zipping it up.
"Yes," I said shortly. "I have to get back to work."
"Have lunch with me."
"I can't. I'm already going to get back to the station late at this rate," I said, slipping back into my shoes. I scanned the room for my purse. It was on the long desk near the window. I walked over to get it.
"Is Davis your son's dad?" he asked. I jumped, hearing him so close to me. He had moved from the bed. I would have to get around him to get to the door.
"Jason, I have to leave."
"Tell me. Is Davis your son's dad?"
"That's none of your business," I spat. I tried to move, but he got in my way. "Jason!"
"It's a simple question, Shel. Tell me."
"Who I fuck is none of your business."
"I don't care who you fuck. I care if your son is my kid."
I sighed, exasperated. He wasn't going to let it go. I could have just said it. Just told him. That would have made him get out of my way, but I didn't want to. I didn't bring people around
my son who I didn't trust. Jason was one of those people. He was disrespectful and demanding already; I didn't want to expose my son to that. People had kids all the time, on purpose, by accident, but having a kid didn't necessarily make you a parent.
"Fine," I said, giving up, leaning against the desk behind me. "I had a baby. He was born here in L.A. I got pregnant after quitting WRTC."
"Is he mine?"
"No," I said, narrowing my eyes. "He's mine." I shoved past him, and he let me pass.
"Shelby—"
"I thought you didn't care who I fucked," I said, turning to face him. His jaw worked, and his shoulders were tense again.
"Then tell me the truth."
"The details of mine and my baby's life are my business."
"What do you have to hide?" he asked. My hand was on the doorknob. I looked at him from across the room. Hooking up with him a year ago, I had walked out of the control room ready to forget that he ever existed, that we had ever met. Was this the guy I wanted to be a father to my child? No, not by a long shot.
"Goodbye, Jason." I opened the door and walked out of the room.
Chapter Thirteen
Jason
"Are we off?" I asked.
"We're off," Adam said, stepping back from the camera. We had just wrapped filming. It was another human-interest segment; Davis had actually mentioned something about it to me, but he hadn't reported on it. Did I feel bad that I had scooped him? No. He should have been expecting it when he had mentioned it to me.
It was about a family who had been searching for their son, twenty-five, who had come back from a term of service in the Marines but hadn't returned home. The investigation had gone on so long; they had almost stopped looking when someone who knew his girlfriend through her volunteer work for homeless veterans had seen someone who they had thought might have been the guy when they were visiting family in San Diego. He had approached him and struck up a conversation, learning that it had been the guy.
He had fallen on some hard times—addiction, homelessness—but he had finally gotten back to his family. An injury, he had lost a leg, had done a lot more psychological damage than physical, but he was on the up and up, back with his family for the first time right in time for Christmas. He could finally get the help that he needed. Those feel-good stories always did well around this time of year. Back in New York, Victoria and my producers were happy, but in a way, work was getting in the way of what I had really wanted to do here in L.A.
I hadn't stopped thinking about Shelby since a couple days ago when she had come to my hotel. My bed wasn't the only place that I wanted her back. She seemed pretty set on staying in L.A. I didn't know what that meant for us. I wanted her, and I had to figure out a way to get her back. Once I did that, everything would work itself out. I just had to figure out how to get there.
In the cab back to the hotel, it came to me. If I was going to get anywhere, I had to tackle this problem in parts. I called Davis and asked if he could meet me for lunch at a restaurant near the hotel.
"You're the last person I expected to hear from today," he said, over the phone.
"I just wrapped filming. I know I beat you to the homeless vet story; I wanted to make amends." He laughed. "So?" He ended up agreeing, not having that much of a reason to say no. Twenty minutes later, he was walking into the restaurant, coming up to my table.
"You know, I almost didn't believe you actually felt bad about what you did," he said, taking a seat. "I gotta say, thanks. I appreciate it."
"Hm. I have a confession."
"What?"
"That wasn't the reason why I asked to meet you today." He looked at me, calm, but I could tell he was a little annoyed.
"Oh no?"
"I wanted to talk about Shelby."
"What? She hasn't told you?"
"So there’s something to tell," I said seriously. He laughed a little.
"I had a feeling this would be coming," he said.
"So you can't say I blindsided you. What is it? How long have you been seeing each other?"
"I had my eye on her since she started working at KJLA. We've sort of had a thing going since more or less the beginning of the year."
"What does that mean?"
"It's on and off," he clarified. "She said from the beginning that she wasn't ready to commit to anything and I respected that. I still wanted to be able to see her, regardless, so we kept it loose."
"Are you her kid's dad?" I asked. He scoffed.
"Nope, and before you ask, I don't know who the baby's father is. She's never told me. There are rumors around the office but no one really knows, and she's never given me any hints, so." He shrugged, resigned.
"So, you dated while she was pregnant?"
"The fact that she was pregnant was one of the first things she even let me know about her before we ever went out. She thought I would find it weird but," he paused, shrugging again, "it didn't make that much of a difference to me."
"All that time, she never let slip who the father was?"
"All she told me was he was a man who was in her past and who was going to stay there."
"I've been thinking..."
"What?"
"I think it's me. I think it's my kid," I said, voice lowered even though no one was listening to us. He scoffed again, laughing. He leaned back in his seat, looking at me.
"So, it's true. You two did hook up," he said.
"It was before she left the station. One-time thing."
"I had a feeling that you two had had a past."
"If I'm right, we have a lot more than just a past."
"So, what do you want to do?" he asked, leaning forward again.
"I'm not sure. I need to find out the truth. After that, if I'm right, I want to do the right thing for her. For them."
"That's noble, really, but telling you straight, Jason, with Shelby, you're about to be fighting an uphill battle, my friend."
I frowned. "Why?"
"She's pretty committed to raising her kid alone. Whoever the kid's dad is isn't in her life because she wants it that way."
"Why would she do that if he could help her out?" I asked. He shrugged.
"It's not exactly something we ever discussed. That stuff was private so I never really asked her about it. What I can tell you is she isn't alone because she ended up that way. She's raising her son alone because she wants to."
"That doesn't make sense," I said, mostly to myself. I would have thought that most mothers would want help or at least acknowledgment from their kids' fathers, even if they weren't together. Shelby worked for a national news station so I guessed that meant she wasn't struggling financially; she wouldn't really be too pressed about getting child support. Still, I couldn't imagine growing up with just my dad or just my mom. They had balanced each other out in a way. I knew thousands, millions of people, in fact, grew up with single parents and turned out fine, but I couldn't imagine why you would be a single parent when your kid's other parent wasn't resisting parenthood.
"I never questioned her about it. I don't have kids. If she made that decision, she must have had a good reason to."
"Isn't it... isn't it hard? Doesn't she need help? I feel like I could be a good parent if I had the chance."
"If you had the chance and if the kid is yours," Davis clarified.
"I really think I'm onto something."
"Are you sure about that?" he asked.
"That he's mine?"
"That you could be a good dad." His face was serious. It almost sounded like a challenge. I wasn't nervous about him. He had said himself that he and Shelby had been seeing each other on and off for what had to be the whole year she had been in L.A. and never made it official. I didn't think she was about to now or that he would finally nut up and do something about it.
"What's it to you?"
"Hey," he said, raising his hands, "you're right. It’s none of my business. It's just something you're going to have to figure out if you want to try again wit
h Shel."
"What about you?" I asked.
"It's not up to me," he said. "Good luck with her. She's a good woman; I hope you're what she's looking for." He got up and patted my arm before walking away. We hadn’t ordered food, so I paid for our drinks and left.
I had been ready for a little more resistance than that. I sure as hell wouldn't have given up on her that easily. Maybe there was more about their whole thing that they had had going on that I didn't know. If he was backing off, then that was better for me. What the hell had he meant saying he hoped I was what she was looking for? He had said they had been on and off, but he had still been with her for a year that I hadn't been. What the hell did he know that I didn't?
Whatever. It didn't matter. I was getting her back. I wasn't leaving this damn city till I did.
Chapter Fourteen
Shelby
"What would we be doing right now if we were still in New York?" I thought out loud. Damien laughed and kicked his legs as I pushed him gently on a swing. "Not this," I said, smiling. Not in December, at least. I would have probably had him bundled up at home for the next three or four months while the temperature got disrespectfully cold.
I appreciated that the sun was an all year thing here. No wonder my mom and stepdad had moved here after years of living in North Carolina. No wonder so many people who moved here from other places never wanted to go back. I was new at this motherhood thing and growing up with all four seasons hadn't killed me or the millions of other people who had done it but still. Taking my son out to the park would have been impossible if we had still been in New York.
My neighborhood was right near Griffith Park. There were green spaces everywhere in L.A., but the playground here had a swing set that was safe for babies a year old and younger. Damien already held his head up pretty well and could sit up supported. He kicked his little legs and giggled as I pushed the swing. I smiled, listening to him. I would have figured it out and made it work no matter where we would have found ourselves, but again, I was glad it was here.