Father of the Man
Page 32
HESTER
(Cont.) There you are, then—you can teach me the tango. And the foxtrot. And the bunny hug. And then we’ll go off to the discos and show all these silly young things how they ought to be dancing!
FLORA
Well, we’ll have to see. I mean, about my moving in. I don’t want to agree just on impulse.
HESTER
But you will stay here tonight?
FLORA
Yes.
HESTER
And you really find the idea quite tempting?
FLORA
Yes.
HESTER
I promise you—no more spaghetti; I won’t permit any spaghetti within a mile or so of this house.
FLORA
(Laughs) Flat!
HESTER
(Pause) Exactly. Do you know…for a moment just then…oh how ridiculous…I was almost thinking I was back at Ashford—you know, the house where I grew up. I half-dozed for a few minutes just now. I was remembering a little bit about the old days. (Pause) Flora, darling?
FLORA
Yes?
HESTER
I want you to forgive me—if ever I’ve been a less than proper mother to you. No, please don’t say anything. I know I’ve had my failings. If ever I’ve done things which…or said things which…I’m sure you know what I’m talking about but even apart from all of that…Well, from now on it’s going to be so different. I’m going to make it up to you. I’ve decided that at the very least I shall live for another three years…and without losing any of my faculties. Because, you see, Tony told me I wasn’t programmed to lose even one of them—and the fact that only this afternoon he should have made such a comment seems to me a truly remarkable sign. Practically a message. So that gives me a good thousand days in which to atone. Probably more but I’m not going to rely on it.
FLORA
Oh, Mother, please. There’s nothing you have to atone for. And you’ll probably live another twenty-three years.
HESTER
I love you, my darling. I love you very much. Did you know that?
FLORA
(Embarrassed) Of course I did. And I love you, too. I’m only sorry that I haven’t been more…
HESTER
More what, darling?
FLORA
More clever. More witty. More entertaining. I’m under no illusions about the way I am. I’m not surprised that Harold left me. Or that Tony did. I think I must be very boring company.
HESTER
(Takes her in her arms) No, Flora. I won’t have you talk that way! What an absurdity. Who cares about being clever? You’ve always been so sweet and attentive and…Well, tell me this: would I be asking you to come back to live with me if I found you such a bore?
FLORA
I suppose not.
HESTER
There you are, then.
FLORA
I wish I could have liked horses.
HESTER
No—no more of this nonsense. (Gives FLORA’S shoulder an abstracted pat and releases her) Tell me something. Was it just this afternoon that Tony said that about my faculties? Or was it the last time he was here? Time goes so fast—sometimes it’s hard to keep track.
FLORA
I…I don’t know…I…(With sudden resolution) Yes, I’m sure it was this afternoon.
HESTER
Dear Tony. He’s really such a credit to you. You should feel very proud.
FLORA
I don’t feel anything much at the moment. Proud or otherwise.
HESTER
You will. Oh, you will. All you need now is a good night’s sleep. And that you’re most definitely going to have. I shall give you one of my Valium.
FLORA
Oh, I don’t need—
HESTER
No arguments now. Mother knows best.
FLORA
I feel about eight again.
HESTER
And tomorrow, maybe, you’ll feel about eighteen and that will be even better.
FLORA
Will it? All right…yes, eighteen…if you say so.
HESTER
But, darling—about Tony. I feel sure he’s going to be sensible and do the right thing. I know he will, I just feel it in my bones. Yet even if he doesn’t we’re not going to make a fuss. University or no university. The decision now is his. We’ve said all we can. If he still chooses to…to go his own way…well, then we must simply accept it. And wish him well. And not make him feel guilty.
FLORA
He’ll simply destroy his life, that’s all. And mine. And make the whole thing seem so utterly pointless.
HESTER
What whole thing?
FLORA
Why, the whole business of having children and then planning your life around them.
HESTER
Oh but Flora, my angel, that’s an awful thing to say. I’m sure you don’t mean it. You don’t have children just in order that they’ll be successful. You can’t live your life through theirs—or expect to be a puppet-master who can always pull the strings. They’re more than mere extensions.
FLORA
Who’s talking about…puppet-masters?
TONY comes in.
HESTER
(To TONY) Darling, I thought you’d gone.
TONY
I’ve been talking to Mr Davis.
HESTER
And I’m sure he must have appreciated it. Dear Walter. It takes so little to make him happy. The other afternoon—Mary was out—I gave him a slice of bread-and-butter for his tea. For some reason I happened to fold it over before presenting it to him. “By Jove,” he said. “Sandwiches!” I was so moved I just had to kiss him. “That’s very nice,” he said, “whatever have I done to deserve that?” “Walter,” I told him, “you have stumbled upon the secret of contentment.”
TONY
And what did he say?
HESTER
Oh, he chuckled—you know the way he does. “In that case, Madam, don’t think you can worm it out of me by playing Mata Hari!”
TONY
(Pause) At the moment, Tennyson’s still very much on his mind. He knows quite a lot about him. All fascinating stuff.
FLORA
Especially if you haven’t heard it about a thousand times before.
TONY
(Indulgently) Oh—you! If he were telling you for the very first time you still wouldn’t be paying much attention.
FLORA
It’s today I live in, not a hundred years ago.
HESTER
A hundred years hence, as he always tells us, none of this will make a jot of difference.
FLORA
Yes, that’s just the senseless sort of thing he would say.
HESTER
(To TONY) Your mother’s still a bit upset. (Brightly) Well, how about a glass of sherry, everyone? I think that’s the remedy we all require. (To TONY) Though I hope you’re remembering to keep an eye on the time? We don’t want you late for your appointment.
TONY
(Glances at watch) No, I’m all right for another few minutes.
HESTER
Sherry, then?
TONY
Yes, please.
FLORA
It’s a couple of hours hence—that’s what worries me.
HESTER
Yes, darling; but you must do what you can not to let it.
FLORA
Besides, it isn’t even true. A hundred years hence it will make a vast amount of difference. If Tony gets a good job and a good income and mixes with nice people, then he’ll marry a better class of girl and have a better class of child. That child, as well, will mix with better types. In a hundred years’ time, therefore, his great-grandchildren could either be a credit to their country or just a drain on its resources. Why, with this girl he may not even have children; perhaps she won’t want any more. Of course it makes a difference!
TONY
(To HESTER; attempting lightness) See
what a snob you’ve nurtured in your bosom!
FLORA
Yes, I may be a snob; but at least I’m honest about it. I do like nice things and I do like nice people. And anybody who says they don’t is only a hypocrite.
TONY
Don’t look at me. I also like nice things and nice people.
FLORA
So how many of them do you think you’re going to meet along the Mile End Road?
TONY
Yard for yard? Oh, about the same number, I suppose, that I’d meet around the corner, in West End Lane.
FLORA
Well, I’m sorry, but I beg to differ.
TONY
Then, Mum, that’s your prerogative and no one plans to take it from you.
HESTER
(To TONY) Darling, in view of your mother’s slightly distressed condition, you couldn’t perhaps give us a tiny hint, could you? About the choice you’re going to make regarding university?
TONY
Yes, that’s why I came back. But feeling as she does about the Mile End Road I can’t see that either choice would help to make her happy. I could become as educated as all get-out and still be leaving her dissatisfied.
HESTER
(Standing behind FLORA and making urgent gestures for TONY to see; yet managing to keep her tone quite light) Now, Tony, sweetheart. A little understanding, if you please.
TONY
(Impervious to the gestures; voice still full of repressed anger) Understanding of what?
HESTER
(Patiently) Understanding of the fact that others have their needs—not just yourself.
FLORA
Understanding of the fact that I don’t give a damn about your education! That I don’t want you going to live with some trollop in the East End whose boyfriend killed himself with drugs and whose children will turn out to be exactly like him! That I don’t want you mixing in bad company because…oh, yes, Tony, you may think I don’t know you but I promise you I do! I know how easily you can be influenced by whoever you happen to be around at the time! Live with riffraff…you turn into riffraff!
TONY
Then I’d better get out of here pretty quick, hadn’t I?
FLORA
Understanding of the fact that I won’t have you living with any woman. Not any woman—do you hear?—not even Carol Klingman. You’re nineteen, you’re a child. Some nineteen-year-olds, perhaps…But you—you’ve always been extremely immature, even at the best of times. A woman of twenty-four would make mincemeat of you, just twist you round her little finger—especially her type of woman. And you do realize, of course, that she’s only after the money she thinks you’ve got—not you, maybe, but your family? I suppose you do at least realize that? Because there’s no other reason—no other reason at all—why a woman of her age would ever want to go to bed with a boy like you. Did you think you were a man? No. You’re a meal ticket and she’s a prostitute!
HESTER
Flora, Flora, stop this, do you hear? You don’t know what you’re saying. You too, Tony, stop it! Show her that you aren’t so young—that you’re quite man enough to make allowances. In fact, darling, I think you ought to go. I’ll get her to bed; she’s going to spend the night here. Why don’t you just slip away quietly? Then you can come back tomorrow or the next day—whenever it’s convenient.
TONY
I shan’t need to. I can give you my decision now.
HESTER
I meant simply, come back to find out how she is. And to give her a chance to say she’s sorry. To make your peace with one another.
TONY
Do you realize, when I came in here I was all prepared to do as she wanted—to do as you both wanted? To accept your terms. Sitting there in my usual armchair, talking to Mr Davis, listening to him reminisce just as I’ve done for roughly the past dozen years…I don’t know…I began to think…just listening to him talk about Tennyson…But now—
HESTER
I don’t want to hear about but now! In the first place you’re not in the right frame of mind and in the second (Indicating his mother) at present I have more important matters to attend to.
TONY
I shall be leaving college and I don’t want any of your money. Nor my father’s.
HESTER
I told you that I don’t want to hear! We’re just not listening to you at the moment.
FLORA
(To TONY) And I suppose you are going to live with her and destroy yourself? Just like that other man did?
TONY
Yes, quite probably. And I’ll be sleeping with her every night, as well. Every night—do you hear? You’ll recognize me by the bags beneath my eyes.
HESTER
I’m not hearing you. I can’t hear you. (Trying to push TONY to the door; failing; opening it and standing at it herself; calling) Mary! Mary! Please come and show Mr Anthony out. He’s just leaving. Please come and show him to the door.
FLORA
(To TONY) You’re disgusting. You—are—disgusting! And I shan’t recognize you by the bags beneath your eyes, because I shan’t be seeing you again. Whenever you come here I shan’t be home, and you certainly needn’t think that I’ll ever visit you in the Mile End Road—or at your potato crisp factory—because I wish to make it plain right now: I shan’t.
Enter MARY; smilingly oblivious.
MARY
(To HESTER) About a minute ago Mr Davis came into the kitchen asking if it was time for tea! And he didn’t even know that Mr Tony was here—not until you called out just now. Poor old fellow. He’s really very sweet. (To TONY) And he sends you his compliments and hopes you’re well; and if you should happen to have a few minutes left to spare there’s something he’d like to say to you about some poetry by Mr Tennyson.
She laughs. This interruption has given TONY a moment to cool down. He just stands there, stricken and deflated, looking about the room, as if imagining it could be for the last time.
TONY
You know I didn’t mean all that.
HESTER
I’m afraid we never seem to know for very long what you do mean or what you don’t. (To MARY) Mr Anthony is just leaving. Will you show him to the door, please.
TONY
I said I was sorry, didn’t I? What more do you want?
HESTER
(Hard) We want to know whether you’ll be staying on at college. You say you’re sorry? Well, let us see that. I’m afraid sorry is as sorry does.
FLORA
(Hard) And we want to know whether you’ll be keeping clear of that prostitute.
TONY shakes his head in disbelief, making his answer to both these questions abundantly clear.
HESTER
(To MARY) Then will you just do as I ask, please, and show my grandson out? No, that’s not right. From now on I have no grandson. Therefore, will you just do as I ask, please, and show this person out?
MARY stands at the door, helpless, unhappy, holding it open. TONY shrugs and walks towards it.
HESTER
(Cont.; to TONY) But, first…(TONY pauses) I want you to understand this completely. That unless you change your mind—on both points—on both points, mark you—then not only your mother but I as well will never wish to set eyes on you ever again. Ever! And you needn’t think to come crawling back to us as soon as you find yourself in some kind of a fix, because—Mary, do you hear this?—this gentleman is never to step foot inside this flat again, unless I’ve first given you express permission to admit him.(To TONY) And I suppose you realize what that means? Not only will you be cut off from your family but also from any kind of benefit I have no doubt you hoped to gain when any of that family died. Nowhere to call home; nowhere to spend Christmas; nowhere to be nursed when you are ill…You have until Monday to consider this.
TONY looks at FLORA. FLORA says nothing. She and her mother make a solid front.
HESTER
(Cont.) And it also means—please bear this in mind—it also means that
you won’t be seeing Mr Davis. Does that carry a little more weight? Invariably he asks, “Is Mr Tony-sir coming for dinner tonight?” Every day of the week. Every day of his life. Without fail. “Is Mr Tony-sir coming for dinner tonight?”
TONY
(Hesitates; ironic) I imagine you won’t stop me from writing to him?
HESTER
(Shrugs) No, I can’t stop you from writing to him. And any letter you send him, of course, will be faithfully delivered. But any letter you write to us will be put back in the box, unopened.
FLORA
Address unknown! So you’ll never get it back. You’ll never quite know.
TONY
Fine. Well, that suits me all right. Goodbye, then.
HESTER
You have until Monday, remember. (TONY doesn’t stop in his journey to the door) And while we’re about it—remember something else. That obstinacy—and wanting to appear strong, in control, unbeatable—has always been one of the greatest forms of weakness there is. In the end it will destroy you.
TONY
(Pausing only briefly) Goodbye.
HESTER
You realize you’ll regret this?
TONY
Yes. I realize that whichever course I take I shall almost certainly regret it.
He goes. MARY closes the door behind them both. FLORA stands looking at the door. Her face suddenly crumples. HESTER goes to her, puts her arms about her, leads her to a chair; FLORA allows herself to be led. HESTER finally pours the sherry.
FLORA
I was just remembering, how he took me out to dinner on my birthday. And this lovely bracelet that he bought. (Holds up her arm to display the bracelet)
HESTER
Don’t worry. He’ll be back. For all his pathetic show of independence.
She brings FLORA a glass of sherry. Raises her own, in a toast. At first she has to make a real effort to sound positive; but then, admirably fast, begins to find it easier.
HESTER
(Cont.) Yes, happy days, my angel! Oh, Flora, that’s right: let’s drink to happy days—to over a thousand of them! Happy, happy days! Filled with treats and outings; theatres, concerts; holidays abroad! A little game called Making up for lost time! Yes, the lovely little game of making up for lost time…And how about this, my love, as soon as we can put it into practice? Should we invite them here to lunch one Sunday—say, the Sunday after next—and then take them into Golders Hill Park; either that or up to the Heath or over to the Zoo? (Pause) Can you still, I wonder, be given rides on the backs of animals? As a child, how I used to love going for donkey rides along the sands! In any case we’ll buy them ice-creams…or candy floss if they’d prefer it…and buckets and spades if they don’t already have them…and take them somewhere very nice for tea, possibly find a little place that overlooks the bay? (Pause) Oh, but there’s one thing I definitely do know, my precious—and please don’t look so shocked or disbelieving—one thing I shall most definitely be able to promise you. (Pause; raises her sherry glass again, as if to add extra weight to such a heartfelt declaration) I’m going to do everything that lies within my power to make you happy…so very happy, my darling…all of you…and there’s absolutely nothing in this world that’s ever going to stop me!