Child Identity Theft

by Robert P. Chappell

  Criminals are targeting children at birth, so you are already at a disadvantage. I recommend that you start young. Do not wait for a specific age, such as when they start school or when they get their first computer. According to a 2008 research project study conducted by Javelin Strategy and Research,1 12 percent of all children experiencing child identity theft issues are under the age of five. Start discussions as soon as your children can understand who you are versus a stranger. Child identity theft is not just about finances, it is about a predator targeting your child because of his or her age.

  A good child identity theft discussion with children should include the following topics:

  What is personal or private information? Children understand private body parts but may have no concept of what personal information is or that it can be abused. I would cover name, date of birth, and address if the child is very young. If your child is over six years old, I would add phone numbers and phone usage, Social Security numbers, and computer safety to your discussion. Covering the “basics” appropriate for a particular age group is fine, but the conversation is a must. Parents are the best people to decipher what their child can absorb at what age. After your initial discussion, revisiting the topic of child identity theft as they mature is a great idea.

  Parents set the ground rules for their children as they are growing up. Use this influence to set healthy guidelines on who should have access to your child’s information. When your child understands this, they will be less intimidated.

  Teach your child to communicate with you, as well as advise you who is asking for their information. Be informed about your child’s life by asking them to tell you when someone wants to know their personal information.

  Reinforce not talking to strangers. It is fine to be courteous, it’s “gentlemanly” to hold the door for someone, it may sound respectable to hear your child respond to someone with “yes, ma’am” or “yes, sir,” but teach your children to resist giving out personal information to strangers.

  Reinforce a child’s right to say NO to things that make them uncomfortable. If anyone asks your child something that makes them uncomfortable, he or she should have the right to consult with you before answering. This is not disrespectful but rather protective from many aspects.

  View computers as a launching platform that connects your child with the rest of the world. Discuss the benefits of such technology and the education that can be gained from knowledge. Reinforce the dangers that can be found as well as the benefits. Set parameters on what can and cannot be viewed and discuss why unapproved sites are dangerous. Remember, if you do not have these conversations with your child, someone else will who may not share your opinions.

  Question #75: What emotional impact will child identity theft have on my family?

  The emotional trauma a child experiences in child identity theft is real. One of the best descriptions that capture the feelings during this emotionally charged period is the emotional “roller-coaster effect.” Prepare yourself and your child mentally to experience an emotional roller coaster of feelings when dealing with child identity theft issues. The emotions may be a result of an event that occurred, a phone call received, an interview conducted, a letter received, or some other type of issue you are dealing with. You will experience “highs” on good days, thinking you are making great progress, and “lows” on days in which you think there is no end.

  The first emotion usually experienced by a child identity theft victim and his or her parents or guardians is disbelief. As a family, how could you not have seen it coming? What were the signs that you missed? Who were you in contact with that could have done this to you or your child? How long has this been going on? Why would someone target your child?

  Other common emotions experienced are anger, frustration, and feelings of helplessness. Most do not even know the crime exists until they have been victimized. Once victimized, denial is a waste of time for both you and your child. The time spent in denial would be better spent on solving the problem.

  Whether your case is an eighteen-year-old who has found out they were victimized as a child, or a parent who has discovered their child has been victimized, the traumatic emotions are the same. There is nothing abnormal about feeling violated by a criminal stealing something as close and personal as your name. Child identity theft is much like many other crimes that affect a person’s safety and feelings of change in their ability to be protected, or protect others.

  Being victimized leaves you with a feeling of insecurity. From your child’s point of view, it may be the first time that you, as the parent or guardian, could not protect them from harm. Your child’s perspective on safety may be altered somewhat by the event. Provide your child with comfort and reassurance. Their view of you in action fighting for them will be long lasting and will help them understand that with victimization can be the strong support and love from those they trust the most in their lives.

  Another important point to note up front is that this crime is not just a personal crime of finances but rather a crime that is emotionally damaging with a wide path of those it affects. The further along you get into resolving your child’s victimization, the more you will agree that it is not your child alone who will be damaged emotionally. Child identity theft is a hurtful crime that will emotionally impact your entire family.

  Building a strong support system is essential. My first suggestion is to include those around you who would normally be of help and emotional support during a crisis. Understand that most of the necessary cleanup can only be done by you. Creditors, banks, credit referral agencies, and others burned once by an identity thief will require positive identification when dealing with you on the cleanup. Gather all documents you can find to prove your child does in fact belong to you. Contact law enforcement and request that a report be taken. Use the checklist this book provides to ensure you have taken the necessary steps to clear your child’s name.

  Family members, if not the perpetrators, are great to assist you with collecting the child’s birth certificate, Social Security card, school report cards, school IDs, passports, military IDs (if a military dependent), photos, and other documents to prove the child is who you indicate he or she is. Be prepared to have to prove who you are as well.

  Question #76: What emotional trauma can parents expect to experience in child identity theft?

  Significant emotional damage is done to a parent as well as the child. The first and worst is definitely guilt. Feeling guilty that you could have done more to protect your child is normal. The best advice I can provide is if you have already been victimized, learn from what has happened and never accept the “it won’t happen to me or my child” philosophy. If you haven’t been a victim, start protecting your child now by taking proactive steps to protect your child’s identity.

  If you take proactive steps to ensure your child’s safety, there is little cause to feel guilty. Realize that there is no 100 percent guarantee of child protection throughout life. Consider it much like talking to your child about the dangers of drugs, setting a good example, and then hoping they make the right decisions. Not exactly on point, I understand, because what a stranger, friend, or relative does to you or your child may be unpreventable. The point is this, though: did you take steps to secure your child’s identity? Did you lock up their birth certificate? Did you talk to them about releasing information about themselves?

  You cannot stand over your child twenty-four hours a day. They must go to school, visit relatives, play sports, play with other children, and have a normal life. You want normal interaction so they will be socially healthy. In addition to setting a good example in life, give them the skills they need to be successful, such as teaching them not to release personal information.

  To restate my point, once you have taken proactive steps, you have little cause for guilt. If your child is still victimized, then focus your energy on cleaning up the mess and bringing the criminal to justice by assisting law enforcement. Chan
nel your efforts into cleaning up the false items listed on credit reports, closing fraudulent credit card accounts, and notifying providers that your child is not of age to have opened service accounts.

  It will not be an easy process. In addition to feeling angry about being violated, be prepared to experience embarrassment during the process of healing and cleaning up the mess. Embarrassment is common when interacting with other parents, school officials, relatives, and people you will deal with to fix the problems. It will go hand in hand with the guilt you will experience when you feel you “let” this happen to your child.

  Some of the feelings of embarrassment will come from the belief you may have, in some way, contributed to the theft of your child’s identity. Understand that both you and your child are victims. No one asks to be a victim of crime. Victimization requires healing, as trusting again does not come easy. Clear up the problem and then take preventive steps toward reducing the chances of it happening again.

  Burnout is real. Be prepared to experience burnout on several levels if your case is not solved quickly. You, first and foremost, will become tired of dealing with creditors, banks, credit reporting agencies, and law enforcement. Even if they are trying to help you, it will still drain you emotionally to share the same information over and over again. Things you might have enjoyed before, like getting the mail out of the mailbox, will become dreaded acts. Opening the box to find another bill, another collection notice, or worse, a court document will invoke feelings of anger.

  Be prepared for reduced support as this drags on. It is imperative you solve identity theft as quickly as possible. I understand that this is out of your control most times. Cleaning up the mess as quickly as possible is important because those around you will eventually become numb to your stories, pain, and the events happening to you. Given their initial disbelief and anger, I know it is hard to believe and imagine their support would decline, but it is very true. Others’ lives must go on, but yours will be put on hold.

  Child identity theft is not always solved quickly. Identities can be stolen, sold, and then resold several times. If you are lucky, it will be stolen once and the thief caught quickly. Your case could involve many jurisdictions and many years of abuse. Determination will be what brings your suffering to an end.

  Question #77: I’m the one who took my child’s identity. What should I do?

  There are two important aspects of concern when a parent steals from a child. The first is legal, and the second is emotional. Both aspects are high priority, and choosing between them is tough. Parents stealing their children’s identities usually do so for one of two reasons.

  The first is to provide for the child. In doing so, they justify the theft by saying that they have used the child’s identity to provide care that they would not have been able to maintain or obtain otherwise. Providing care, in this example, might come in the form of a utility service, such as a power company connection. It might also be a water hookup or a fuel or oil account for a home heating system. These services are basic care services. Extended basic services might include a credit account for food, or the purchase of a basic vehicle for transportation.

  Besides the obvious theft and violation, the problem with “borrowing” your child’s identity to obtain services is that it becomes a gateway to abuse. Most parents start the process saying that they will only do it for a short period to get through a tough time. The reality is that once it is done, a crime has been committed.

  It is rare that parents stop at basic service needs. This brings us to the second reason parents steal a child’s identity, which is greed. As sad as it sounds, the history of child identity theft actually shows that stealing a child’s identity for basic services usually leads to using the same continuation of theft for items of luxury, such as electronics, higher-priced vehicles, and credit cards that will never be paid off.

  Parents stealing from their children do so in part because they feel they could never be caught, and if they are caught, who would testify against them? Certainly not their child, right? Foster parents and temporary foster parents who commit child identity theft feel like the child stayed with so many sets of parents, possibly in many foster care facilities, that by the time the child turns eighteen years old, he or she will never remember, or be able to prove, who stole their identity.

  So where does that leave the child? From an emotional standpoint, it leaves them in need of counseling. If you took your child’s identity, you need to fix the damage and seek family counseling so that a professional can assist each family member with the healing process. If you fail to rectify the problem correctly, you may find yourself related to a child that feels bitterness and hatred toward you for the abuse you have caused.

  As the bitterness grows, you may also find yourself in civil court. A child does have the right to sue their parents whether they are over the age of eighteen or not. The lawsuit can be for amounts owed while using the stolen name or for punitive damages and emotional harm caused by the theft. While most parents would consider this extreme, it cannot be ruled out, as it is a viable option for the victim.

  This brings us to the overall issue of trust. Every child needs the ability to trust someone. Destroyed trust is one of the sad realities of child crimes. Much like child sexual abuse, identity theft cases that involve parents leave children with the fear that those charged with their protection no longer can be trusted. Once you lose the trust of your child, gaining it back may be difficult, if not impossible.

  If you find yourself in financial trouble, seek financial advice from your bank or someone you can trust about financial matters. Ask if there are additional hours available to work at your current job, understanding that you may also have to explore an additional job to generate more income. If possible, obtain a loan to get you through a tough period, or ask other family members for help if that is an option. Be creative in resolving your financial situation, as you are ultimately responsible for all debt incurred in your name. Show your children you care by protecting them and providing them with a fair chance at success in adulthood. Avoid child identity theft as a solution to financial problems for your children’s sake.

  Question #78: How should I handle it when the thief turns out to be a relative?

  Healing is easier said than done when the thief is a relative. Most children look to relatives as elders, mentors, and protectors. A helpful relative can have a strong relationship in a child’s life. The wrong kind of family relationship occurs when a relative is not the helpful kin but rather the harmful foe. Picture this scenario: your child comes of age only to find out that a relative “borrowed” his or her Social Security number somewhere along the way, and now the young adult has a ruined credit history.

  This crime is real and occurs every day. It could have been a one-time theft or a repeated purchasing spree for items of fun and luxury. It also could have been to obtain a job or purchase a home. Regardless of the reason, though, it is illegal, unfair, and emotionally abusive to the victim. Child identity theft committed by a relative leaves a child with feelings of betrayal.

  According to the U.S. Department of Justice, Office of Justice Programs, “Family identity theft, sometimes called intergenerational identity theft, may be the easiest of these crimes to commit, because the perpetrator has ready access to the victim’s personal information. Identity theft among family members is frequently regarded as a personal family matter, not a crime. However, this crime leaves victims feeling as though they had been victimized twice—first by the family member, and then by the system, which will not help them unless a police report is filed. Discord among family members is common in these types of cases.”2

  The challenge for victims and their immediate family members will be finding a way to channel the hurt, aggressive feelings, and anger into productive action. What I am trying to convey is that your available time is critical when cleaning up child identity theft. I encourage you to maximize your efforts toward contacting creditors and credi
t-reporting agencies and coordinating with law enforcement officials on your case. Extra time should be devoted to your child and his or her mental health.

  The question you, as a parent, will have to answer is whether or not you are going to notify the police. If you know from the beginning it was a family member, what will you do? Your thoughts may be that it would only make matters worse. The truth is that you will only make matters worse by not addressing it in the proper way. If not addressed, relatives may feel free to do it again, thinking that you are intimidated and will never call law enforcement.

  Child identity theft cases not reported may never get resolved. Some entities will refuse to fix your child identity theft issue unless you report the incident to law enforcement and provide them with a police incident report. If you refuse to have the police investigate the case, and entities refuse to fix the issue, then the one hurt most in this situation is your child. The child will retain all negative information on their credit file and will not be able to make credit purchases as simple as buying furniture on credit, or as complex as buying land or a home.

  In most cases of identity theft where a relative is involved, law enforcement will discover the fact that a relative committed the crime through their investigation. You will not know who the thief is until you meet with the law enforcement officer investigating your case to receive an update. At this point, you may or may not be in control of the outcome. You may not want charges to be brought against your relative, or to have your case prosecuted, but it may be law enforcement or the prosecutor who gets to make the final decision in those matters.

  Regardless of what stage the investigation is in when you find out a relative committed the crime, you need to move forward just as if it was a stranger. Keep the mindset that your child has been victimized and neither you nor your child should have to justify the legal outcome. Remember, your child is your top priority, and his or her future depends on your ability to clean up the damage.