Cityscape Affair Series: The Complete Box Set

by Hawkins, Jessica

  “Oh, I called in a favor with a friend,” I said, waving my hand with the slight exaggeration.

  He smiled tightly as his gaze jumped over my shoulder. “Here comes one of your bachelors now.”

  David.

  My chest tightened. His non-presence had been almost palpable to me, but if I was honest, I’d known he’d show up. He wasn’t the type to let things lie.

  And by the way my heart skipped, I was grateful for that. I turned slowly as footsteps approached, but instead of David’s warm brown eyes, I met sparkling blue ones and a tan face belonging to one distinguished beach bum. Brian Ayers, the surfer and photographer David had recommended I add to the feature, shook out his bleached, shoulder-length hair. “Evening, Olivia.”

  Mr. Beman started to stick out his hand, but when he noticed that Brian carried two wineglasses, Beman tightened his already taut tie instead. “Thank you for agreeing to do the feature, Mr. Ayers,” he said. “I’ve so enjoyed perusing your photography.”

  “Call me Brian.” Brian turned to me. “And when can I add you to my collection, Olivia?”

  Almost every wall of Brian’s studio apartment had been covered with gritty, intrusive portraits of people from all walks of life. Like David, Brian had a way of looking past people’s facades and capturing deeper emotion.

  Which sounded awful.

  “How about on the tenth of . . . never,” I said and smiled as he laughed.

  “If you’ll excuse me,” my boss said and hesitated before nodding at me. “Very nice turnout, Olivia. Keep up the good work.”

  I exhaled a breath of pure relief. With David’s help securing the venue at a steep discount, and with strong sponsors and an A-List guest list . . . it was fair to say I’d pulled it off. And that I was squarely in the running to nab this promotion.

  Brian held out one of the glasses of white wine. “Cheers.”

  “For me?” I asked.

  He nodded. “Chardonnay. I remember that was what I served you during our interview.”

  I almost laughed but a pang in my heart stopped me. David would scold me with a look for accepting what others expected of me. Despite tonight’s wins, his absence lingered, a dark cloud overhead. As the clock ticked down, it became more apparent that the only man who’d ever thought to question my chardonnay had truly walked away.

  Maybe the alcohol would numb the disappointment—and the pain of the last twenty-four hours.

  Davena. I blocked the name from my mind and accepted the glass. It wasn’t like me to drink on the job, but tonight, relaxing my control even a little felt like a reward for a tough week.

  I forced a wide smile, clinked my glass with his, and took a large sip. “I can see why everyone says you’re so charming, Brian Ayers,” I said. “You always come with alcohol.”

  “It’s nice to see you again.” With a grin as he glanced behind me, he leaned in to kiss my cheek. “What is that perfume? It reminds me of Paris!”

  I giggled. “I’m not wearing anything.”

  As I drew away, a voice behind me rumbled in greeting. “Ayers.”

  My heart leaped into my throat as David’s unmistakable presence stopped next to me.

  “David. Didn’t see you there.” Brian winked at me. The men shook hands with vigor. “I was beginning to wonder if you’d show your ugly mug.”

  “Careful.” David’s steady tone hinted at teasing as he started to take a sip of something dark. “You wouldn’t even be allowed in the venue if I hadn’t pulled strings to get you in this magazine feature.”

  Brian’s chiding response fell on deaf ears as I glanced up and met David’s unreadable gaze, locked on me. He’d shown up, but he didn’t look happy about it. What was he thinking? His expression remained smoother than his bristly jawline, his dark hair disheveled. I rolled my lips together to keep from gaping.

  “How’s your date going?” I asked, looking past him for a woman.

  David looked into his drink. “Over before it began, I’m afraid.”

  I concealed a burst of giddiness by drinking more chardonnay. Perhaps it was thanks to the alcohol, but I dismissed any shame over my unwarranted and uncharacteristic jealousy.

  “Only a fool would bring a date to a party filled to the brim with beautiful women,” Brian said, drawing my attention back to him. “In fact, I was just asking Olivia here when she was going to let me take her picture. You’d look perfect hanging in my living room, Liv.”

  I blushed. “I don’t think so.”

  “Don’t get shy on me.” Brian wrapped me in a side hug, looking down at me. “You have magnificent eyes—they really are unusual. The camera would love them. Aren’t they magnificent, David?”

  “They are,” David said without a hint of emotion. He swirled his dark-honey drink in measured circles. A charcoal V-neck sweater over a slate-gray button down showed off the knot of a matching tie, which he loosened as his eyes burned into me. My body thrummed under his dimming gaze. The way he looked at me, like he couldn’t control what might happen next, almost brought me to my knees.

  “What do you say to that, David?” Brian asked, breaking through our moment.

  “Hmm?” With obvious reluctance, David tore his eyes from mine. “To what?”

  “I just told you there’s a nice-looking redhead over by the railing, twirling her hair, just begging for you to scoop her up. Why don’t you run along so Olivia can give me a rundown of available women?”

  I followed Brian’s gaze to the hotel’s event coordinator. After David had connected us, Serena and I had met with her a few times to plan this event. When David looked over, she waved, as if she’d been waiting to catch his attention.

  David nodded. “That’s Amber. She works here.”

  “Well, that’s convenient.” Brian smirked. “She can run one floor down when she’s on break.”

  “Fuck off,” David said, glancing at Brian’s arm around me. “And why don’t you keep your hands to yourself?”

  Brian showed us his palms, a twinkle in his eyes as he nodded sideways at David. “I don’t know what’s up his ass, but he needs a good lay, and he isn’t going to get it hanging out with us, is he?” he asked. “She’s just David’s type, but I like a girl with substance, Olivia. Someone creative and carefree, who’s also a little weird.”

  I bit my cheek to hide my smile at the unsubtle swipe at his friend.

  “Let’s find me a girl like you—smart and beautiful, but edgy, too,” Brian said and sipped his wine. When I started to protest, he took my hand and lifted my arm, urging me to twirl. “Oh, come on, I know you’re a little wild. Look at you, in your leather dress.”

  David’s grip tightened around his glass. He didn’t like the topic. He didn’t like Brian touching me. But so what? He wasn’t even supposed to be here, and if he was going to do nothing but brood, why even show up?

  “Actually, I’m borrowing this outfit from my friend,” I said. “And just your luck—she’s here tonight.”

  It wasn’t hard to spot Gretchen, her long, platinum blonde hair like a beacon across the dancefloor. I raised a hand to catch her attention and wave her over. “She’s a real catch. Funny and smart, but she came with someone,” I said.

  “Is she clever?” Brian asked.

  “Yes, though she might try to fool you,” I said, setting my wineglass on the table next to us. “People always underestimate her, and she plays into that.”

  Gretchen waltzed over with what looked like a Shirley Temple, her curious blue eyes flitting over the three of us and landing on the sexy surfer. “Hey.”

  “This is my friend Brian,” I said to her. “He’s one of our bachelors.”

  “I’m aware,” she said with a killer smile. “I’ve already had Liv fill me in on the best attendees.”

  Brian laughed boisterously. “I was just having her do the same for me. But I didn’t see you in the feature. Gretchen, is it?”

  “Gretchen Harper.” Through a tiny straw, she sipped the last of the fizzy red
drink I assumed was actually a Dirty Shirley. “And I was in the mag a couple years back.”

  “Funny, I think I would’ve remembered.” Brian offered her his elbow. “Shall we get you a refill?”

  She slipped her arm through his and said, “Always,” as he led her away.

  “Don’t forget,” I called after them. “I need Brian single until the issue comes out.”

  They ignored me. David, on the other hand, didn’t. Even without turning to him, I knew how he was looking at me. Penetrating and lusty with a twist of somber, and I suddenly remembered the seatbelt. How he’d leaned over to unbuckle it, his hand grazing my skin, so close to the hem of the dress he’d bought me.

  “What are you doing here?” I asked.

  “I came for my answer.”

  The directness of his response made me pause. “I already gave you one.”

  “Storming off after slamming the door in my face in the middle of an argument is not an answer.”

  “That wasn’t an argument,” I said. “It was a finale. With fireworks.”

  “If you felt fireworks, then I assure you, this isn’t over.”

  “It is,” I told him. “It has to be.”

  “Then give me what I came here for.” His eyes drifted down my leather dress and jumped back to mine. “Tell me to back off, Olivia. Say it without pleading me to stay with your eyes, without your body practically vibrating to feel my hands on it.”

  I sucked in a breath but crossed my arms, even though it wouldn’t make a difference. I could close off my body to him, but nobody had ever been able to read the truth in my eyes the way David did. Telling him I didn’t want him would be a lie, and he knew that. “Just because I’m married doesn’t mean I can’t feel attracted to other men.”

  “Yeah?” he asked, jutting his chin at me. “How many other men?”

  None. I picked up my wine for a sip. “You’re reading too much into this.”

  When he set his lips in a line, the angles of his jawline sharpened. “Why do you think I’ve pursued you since the moment I saw you?” he asked, glancing at the chardonnay. “Physical appearance has little do with it.”

  I gaped at the insult. “I never claimed to be your type.”

  “Don’t mistake me. You are the most beautiful woman I’ve ever met.”

  I clenched my teeth, arousal and shock mixing with indignation at what had to be a lie. David had his pick of women anywhere he went—and plenty of practice getting them to spread their legs. “And how many women have you said that to tonight alone?” I asked. “Why don’t you go see if Amber is willing to play, because I’m not.”

  He ignored me. “Your beauty comes from something inside you. I took one look at you at the ballet, and your eyes told me a story. You were alone. You were desperate, as was I. Your vulnerability struck something deep in me.”

  I couldn’t remember the last time, if ever, somebody had described me as vulnerable, let alone accused me of desperate vulnerability. Bill had called me cold. Hours earlier, Gretchen had driven home her point that I’d closed myself off and suppressed emotions since childhood. But I didn’t need either of them to tell me that to know it was true.

  So what had David seen that night? I closed my eyes briefly, reliving those moments of looking around a crowd that included my best friends—my husband—and feeling alone. Alien. My guard hadn’t been up in that one, single moment David and I had locked eyes.

  Chills spread over my bare shoulders. I looked at him now as the truth struggled to the surface. If David fought for me, it could be game over for Bill.

  Was I ready for that? To say good-bye to the life I’d not only known, but the one I’d wanted, the one I’d constructed?

  “If you want something, say it out loud.”

  Out of nowhere, Davena’s words sliced through me. Her death had left a wound I was trying to hold closed until I could grieve alone. But it was also the most glaring sign that life was too short not to selfishly reach for my desires when I had the rare chance to catch one.

  David took my chin between his thumb and forefinger and lifted my face, inspecting my cheek. “You covered the bruise, but I can still see it.”

  “What bruise?” Gretchen asked from behind me.

  I nearly jumped back as David removed his hand. He glanced from Gretchen back to me. “You haven’t told her about last night?”

  “Told me what?” Gretchen fixed her gaze on me. “What happened last . . .” She gasped, and her hand flew to her mouth.

  Brian approached, brows furrowed. “What’s wrong?”

  Gretchen’s eyes widened as she stared at me. “Oh my God,” she said, the words muffled by her hand. “It’s David? He’s the one you—”

  I grabbed her arm and yanked her away, wine sloshing around the glass in my other hand. “Give us a minute,” I called over my shoulder, pushing Gretchen through the crowd until we were in a quiet corner.

  Her face, frozen with shock, quickly thawed. “Oh, Olivia. No, no, no. If David Dylan is the one you’ve fallen for, get up off the ground and run. He’s a total womanizer.”

  I’d accused him of that many times, and it was true. He was a player. But I’d called him that to push him away, not because I couldn’t recognize that to him, I was different. What he and I had was different. I bristled. “You don’t even know him.”

  “I don’t have to. I know enough guys just like him, Liv. Someone like that can be . . . dangerous. He knows how to make you feel special. Believe me. He’s handsome, charming, and sexy. There’s no way he’s not single for a reason.”

  “Sounds familiar,” I accused.

  “Well,” she said, seemingly unfazed, “I learned from experience. From guys like him.”

  “It doesn’t matter,” I said. “I’m not going to act on it.”

  “You mean again?” she said, pursing her lips. “What was he talking about—a bruise? Last night? Did you sleep with him?”

  “No. I told you we didn’t.”

  “And?”

  “And what?” I asked. “I don’t want to get into what happened now—”

  “Fine. I’m tired of pulling information out of you.” She sighed heavily, backing away. “I thought we made progress earlier, but apparently not. Come find me when you’re ready to talk for real. Shit’s going to come out one way or another.”

  I didn’t want to think of Davena just then. Or at all. But with Gretchen’s warnings, Davena’s also echoed through the black hole her absence had left.

  “You can’t hide from your desires. You can suppress them, ignore them, maybe even kill them off. But they’ll stay buried and rotting inside you.”

  24

  There was nothing in the world like the feeling of bass pumping against my brain, reverberating throughout my entire body. The fast and steady beat pulsed in me, entangling with the chardonnay I’d just pounded, manipulating my limbs and looping my hips. Flashes of red, green, and blue pierced the darkness of the dancefloor. A white spotlight flickered over glowing, sweat-dampened skin.

  A man took my hips from behind. For the briefest second I wished it was David, but for all the restraint we’d shown, he’d never grab me out of nowhere. I pushed the hands off and made my way to the bar to order more wine.

  As I waited for the bartender, a heavy arm landed across my shoulders. “Hey, babe,” a young, stocky blond said, swaying with me. “What’s your name?”

  “Who are you?” I asked, trying to slip away, but his grip tightened. I’d vetted every name on the guest list, and those I hadn’t met face to face were at least of drinking age, while this guy looked barely eighteen. “Who are you here with?”

  “I work in the restaurant downstairs and just got off,” he said, his words slurring together as he put his mouth to my ear. “My friend and I snuck in.”

  “Dude, shut up,” said another guy in a black button down. “You’ll get us in trouble.”

  They burst into laughter. “What’s your name?” the blond repeated. “You’re ho
t.”

  “You guys aren’t supposed to be here,” I said. “I have to throw you out.”

  “Aw, come on. Lighten up,” he pleaded. “Let’s get a drink. I’ll buy.”

  “The drinks are free. And no.” I tried wriggling out from under him. “Please, get off of me.”

  “Huh?”

  “She said get off,” David’s voice boomed a second before he yanked the guy’s arm, twisted it, and sent him flying back toward the dancefloor. David positioned himself in front of me and towered over the stocky blond, whose face flashed with a new alertness. “What the fuck don’t you understand about get off?” David said, shoving him into his friend.

  The friend yelled something, holding up his palms, but I couldn’t hear over the music. They hurried away and ran right into security.

  David turned to tower over me. “You need to start paying more attention to—”

  “What the hell are you doing?” I sizzled. “I can take care of myself.”

  “Clearly you can’t,” he said. “Those guys—”

  “Were completely harmless.”

  “You don’t know that.”

  “Forget it.” I pivoted on my heel. “I’m leaving.”

  “Hang on,” he started.

  I spun around to cut him off. “Stay here. Go find Amber and have a good time,” I muttered, craning my neck to look for Gretchen.

  “I’ve barely looked at anyone else tonight, meanwhile Brian’s slobbering all over you,” he said. “I didn’t think he was your type.”

  “I don’t have a type, David. I’m married.”

  David took a step closer and the thrum he’d inspired in me gave way to a full-body vibration. “So you keep saying,” he said, staring me down. “I’m beginning to wonder if you flirt with all of them the way you flirt with me.”

  I balled my hands into fists on each side of me. “I was trying to set him up with Gretchen. You were standing right there.”