All He Feels - Dax & Ginny (Crossroads Book 11)

by Melanie Shawn

  A few particularly humiliating moments stood out in her mind. First, there was the memory of him picking her up like they were in An Officer and a Gentleman and her telling him that he smelled good and she wanted to taste him. She remembered telling Dax that he was the main reason that she’d come to Harper’s Crossing. But the worst was the memory of her saying that she was in crush with him and wanted to kiss him, to do other things that she’d never done before with him and maybe even fall in love with him.

  There were of course other things almost as embarrassing, like when she’d tried to pull him back in the car after he buckled her in and he’d had to remove her hands from his jacket. She’d asked him if he believed in love. She’d told him that he was no fun, she’d mocked him by trying to imitate his voice and called him Mr. Professional, like that was a bad thing.

  Yep. Those were the shining moments that kept playing over and over.

  It was sad that the night had ended so poorly, because it had started out so well. She, Amber and Jamie had been having a good time. Looking back she saw that maybe she’d been having too good of a time.

  She’d never really had friends. She’d gotten along with a few girls she’d met in ballet and jazz, but because her mom kept her schedule so packed she never had time to hang out with them outside of class. Once she’d gotten some celebrity she’d found it hard to meet people that were genuine and just wanted to get to know her, not Virginia Valentine. But here, in Harper’s Crossing, she’d met some really amazing women and had truly enjoyed getting to know them.

  When Amber had offered her a Sangria, she’d only taken it to be polite. But after the first glass had made her feel so relaxed, she’d just kept drinking. Honestly, she wasn’t even sure how many glasses she’d drank. There was a pitcher on the table and every time her glass was low someone had topped it off. One thing was for sure, she had too much. She never really drank, which was probably why she hadn’t recognized her limit.

  She glanced at the clock and saw that she had an hour before she was due at the studio. As much as she didn’t want to face Dax this morning, she knew that she would have to at some point. Besides she needed to clear the air before she worked today. Otherwise, she wouldn’t be able to focus and there was no way she would ever let her personal life, or lack thereof, affect her music.

  As she stood she braced herself for the pounding in her head to return, but to her great relief, it didn’t. And her stomach wasn’t quite as queasy as it had been ten minutes before. Those were both silver linings to what was starting out a cloudy day.

  When she made her way down the hall an uneasiness returned in her belly, but she thought that had more to do with the butterflies that were partying at the Nervous Rave than the after effects of her Sangria indulgence. As she got closer to the kitchen the scent of bacon wafted through the air and it smelled good. She’d thought that she’d be skipping breakfast since she basically felt like vomiting, but it seemed her stomach could be swayed.

  She rounded the corner and saw Dax, with his back to her, at the stove. He was wearing his signature look: jeans, long-sleeve thermal and boots. The morning sun was pouring from the window and the sound of grease popping and sizzling filled the air. Capone was sitting beside him, most likely hoping for some scraps to fall. The scene would cause any woman’s hormones to explode.

  “Smells good,” her voice quivered slightly, but she was still counting it as a win that she’d been able to speak at all.

  “Arf!” Capone barked and ran towards her.

  She bent down and scratched behind his ear and top of his head. “Good morning, handsome man. Did you have a good night’s sleep?”

  “He didn’t leave your side.” Dax’s deep voice sent a shiver dancing through her.

  She knew that he might technically be talking about Capone, but Dax also hadn’t left her side. Raising her head she saw Dax had moved from the stove and was now standing in front of her.

  Placing her hands on her thighs, she wiped her damp palms on her jeans as she stood and looked directly into his eyes. “I’m really sorry about last night. I don’t usually drink and it just got away from me.”

  “No worries. I was glad I was,”—he glanced down at Capone—“sorry Cap, we were there.”

  Then he grinned.

  It was the kind of grin that she was sure had gotten him out of trouble as a kid, had gotten him the head cheerleader in high school, and could probably get him acquitted of murder as an adult. It was the kind of grin that she was sure had reduced greater women with much more experience than her into a pile of mush. She stood zero chance against its potency. Her knees went weak. Literally. She felt them giving out beneath her.

  Hoping to save herself from further embarrassment, she pulled out a seat at the kitchen table and sat down.

  Dax seemed completely unaware of his effect on her as he set the plate of bacon down on the table beside a platter of pancakes and a bowl of scrambled eggs. “How are you feeling this morning?”

  She smiled up at him as he pulled out a chair opposite her. “Better than I deserve to be. Thank you so much for taking such good care of me.”

  He was mid sit when he froze. It was only for a second but Ginny noticed his pause. Then he continued all the way down. “You remember last night?”

  “Bits and pieces.” A nervous laugh escaped her lips and it triggered her memory of laughing at a joke she’d made in his truck. She couldn’t quite put her finger on what it was, but she did remember that she’d thought it was hilarious. And she’d laughed. Hard. She shook her head, wondering how many more suppressed tidbits were just waiting to spring to the surface.

  In blessed silence they began filling their plates, just like they had the morning before. They fell into an easy rhythm. He poured her orange juice and she passed him the syrup and they ate. She was just starting to breathe easy, thinking that they were done talking about the night before. She’d faced it, addressed it, apologized and said thank you. They could move on. But, it turned out she was a little premature in her relief.

  After they’d both made a good dent in their plates he asked, “So what bits and pieces do you remember?”

  “Ummm…” She tapped her fork to the plate and pursed her lips.

  For a moment she considered giving him a media-approved response. Be vague, never specific. But then she decided against it. She didn’t want to do that anymore. She wanted to be real and honest. No matter how scary it was. Taking a breath she set her fork down, wiped her mouth with her napkin, laid it back across her lap and straightened her shoulders.

  She held his gaze as she recounted her list of humiliating moments. “Let’s see I remember leaving Amber’s and stumbling so you had to pick me up and carry me to the car. I remember telling you that you smelled good and that I wanted to taste you. I remember you buckling me in and me trying to pull you back into the car when you tried to shut my door. I remember telling you that you were the reason I came to Harper’s Crossing because I had a crush on you. I remember telling you that you were no fun and calling you Mr. Professional. I remember asking you if you believed in love and also telling you I thought that if I came here we would kiss, do other things that I hadn’t done before and hopefully fall in love.”

  His only reaction to her comprehensive recap was his eyebrows lifting ever so slightly.

  She couldn’t help the smile that spread on her face. She’d actually said what she remembered and the earth hadn’t swallowed her up. She hadn’t died. And she felt better now that it was all out in the open. She felt free. She felt powerful. With a boldness born from that wave of exhilaration she asked, “Did I forget anything?”

  * * *

  Very few people surprised Dax, but Ginny had just shocked the hell out of him. All night he’d been trying to come up with how he could broach the subject of the things she’d said. Never in a million years had he thought she would just come out and say that she remembered. She’d even asked if she’d forgotten anything.

 
“You also told me that Amber and Seth had a one night stand and didn’t know each other’s names before they ran into each other years later and that the first words out of Alex’s mouth when he saw Jamie for the first time was ‘will you marry me’.”

  Her hand flew over her mouth and she mumbled behind her palm, “I did?”

  He nodded in confirmation as she once again had a reaction he never would have suspected.

  She gasped and her eyes widened. “Oh no.”

  Out of all the things she’d said last night, he wouldn’t have thought those would be the ones that would have her gasping.

  “They told me that in confidence.” She dropped her hand and shook her head, clearly frustrated with herself as she continued, “I mean, some of it they’re going to talk about in their couple’s interview for the video, but still. That wasn’t my business to tell.”

  Damn. Was this girl for real? Was she actually upset because she’d betrayed some imagined confidence of people she barely knew? He watched as she pushed a piece of her pancake around her plate.

  He hated seeing her be so hard on herself. “I’m sure those stories are common knowledge in Harper’s Crossing. It’s a small town and everyone knows everyone’s business.”

  “Still,” she shrugged.

  Since that hadn’t made her feel better, he figured he might as well change the subject to something that he was sure would distract her from her perceived indiscretion. “So tell me more about this crush.”

  A flush rose up her cheeks and her eyes lifted to his. He saw a moment of hesitation before she smiled sheepishly. “I’m sorry about that. You have been so generous. You let me stay in your house after I just showed up at your door. You humored my mom by agreeing to be my bodyguard. And then I get drunk and…and then I…well I…you know…”

  It was obvious that she was flustered but that didn’t stop him from pursuing the line of questioning further. In fact, it spurred him on. If she had laughed and said that she had no idea where that had come from and blamed it on drunken ramblings, then he might have dropped it. But her stammering and blushing made him think that there was some truth to what she’d said.

  “No, I don’t know. That’s why I asked the question that you didn’t answer. So I’ll ask again, tell me about this crush,” he repeated but this time added, “Oh and also about the kissing and other stuff you’ve never done before that you wanted to do with me.”

  Her lips pursed in the cute way that he’d noticed they did whenever she was thinking, or nervous, or tense. Her gaze darted around the room and down to the table. She bit her bottom lip and looked like a trapped animal. He was pretty sure at any moment she was going to attempt an escape. She definitely had a fight or flight air about her and he waited patiently for her to decide what her next move was going to be.

  “Fine.” She set down her fork, laid her hands flat on the table, and lifted her gaze to meet his with a glint of challenge in them. “I have, or…um had, I had a crush on you. After I went home with you the night of Stephanie’s party I couldn’t stop thinking about you. I almost called you or texted you about a hundred times but I didn’t know what to say. And I didn’t know what to say because…” She took a deep breath and licked her lips. “Because I’ve never had a boyfriend. I mean a real boyfriend. I’ve only kissed two people. One of them was a drunk guy at a Christmas party and then the second was Derek, but that was just for a show.

  “My life has been really sheltered. I know it probably doesn’t seem like that from the outside looking in, but it has. Before my mom went on this honeymoon, I’d never gone a day without seeing her. She is so amazing and has sacrificed so much for me, but she was wild when she was a teenager and I think she always worried that I would end up that way. So she was always there, making sure I didn’t do, well, anything. Plus, I was always working. And any downtime I had, if she wasn’t with me it was easy for her to keep tabs on me because she would hire security.” She motioned towards him as if he was Exhibit A.

  “Because of that, I never had any time alone. The thing was, until I met you, I didn’t really care.” Her right shoulder lifted in a shrug. “And I don’t want you to get the wrong idea, it’s not like my mom was some crazy stage mom that forced me to sing and perform, she’s not at all. It’s what I wanted to do. What I love to do. And I was never one of those boy-crazy girls. I just wanted to sing, so really it was never an issue. But then after the night we stayed up talking, it was all I could think about. You were all I could think about. It consumed me. The only thing I wanted to do was come back here and see you again. You know, to kiss you and all the other things I’ve never done. But I don’t know, I could never get the courage to do it.

  “Then a lot of things happened at once. My mom got married, I walked away from my label and I fired Shane. I had always planned to give my mom a honeymoon as a wedding gift if she ever got married. So I did. And I made sure it was a long enough time and far enough away that I could spread my wings. I hoped it would be the perfect time to see if there really was anything between us. To see if you felt the same way as I did. So when I dropped my mom off at the airport, I messaged Chase to see if he could work on the album, packed my bags, drove all night and showed up at your door.

  “That was it. My big plan. But then you got roped into being my bodyguard. And then you told Seth that there was nothing going on between us, because obviously there wasn’t, or isn’t. Which is fine. Everything was fine, but then I got drunk and made things awkward. Soooo, that’s it. That’s the whole story.” She let out a huff of laughter as she stood and grabbed her plate. He watched as she took it to the sink and started rinsing it. Glancing over her shoulder she said, “I’m sorry again, I promise I won’t sneak into your room and take advantage of you in your sleep or anything.”

  So many emotions were raging inside of him, he didn’t exactly know where to start. He felt more protective, more possessive and more primal than he even knew he was capable of feeling. Those feelings drove him as he got up and crossed the kitchen stopping directly behind her. All he could hear was the pounding of his heartbeat in his head as he placed his hands on the counter on either side of her, caging her in.

  Leaning down, so his lips brushed her ear, he rasped, “Since the morning you left all I could think about was you. It drove me crazy. I know you said you’ve never had a boyfriend, but since I was a teenager I have dated a constant stream of women. Never anyone seriously, but always someone. But since spending that night with you on my couch, I haven’t gone home with anyone. I haven’t had sex with anyone. I haven’t kissed anyone. I haven’t touched anyone. No one else existed but you. Only you.”

  Over her shoulder he could see her chest rising and falling in rapid pants as she slowly turned so she was facing him. Her aqua blue eyes peeked up at him through a bed of dark lashes. They were so wide and open he honestly felt like he could drown in her stare. In that instant he completely forgot who he was or even where he was. There was a lot more he had to say, but he couldn’t speak. He was like a caveman and all he could think about was kissing her mouth and claiming her.

  “Do you still want to kiss me?” There was an urgency in his voice. He needed to know and he needed to know now.

  She nodded as she took in a shaky breath. “Yes, yes, ye—”

  Before she got the last yes out he lowered his mouth to hers. Her lips were so soft, so perfect. He luxuriated in them as his mouth swept first her top and then the bottom lip. The gentle massage of their mouths meeting in this sensual kiss sent currents of lust rippling through him. He lost himself in the innocent intimacy of the moment. He didn’t rush it, instead he lingered and savored every second. It was as if time was standing still as he took his time drinking in the sweet tenderness of their kiss.

  That precious bubble of suspended time snapped when a soft moan came from the back of her throat. Desire so strong it made it hard for him to breath crashed into him. He needed to be closer to her, to feel her pressed up against him.

>   Not breaking the connection of their kiss, he snaked his arm around her waist and lifted her up before turning and setting her on the counter. Her arms encircled his neck and he stepped between her legs as she wrapped them around his waist. Her body molded to his and he could feel her full breasts crushed to his chest and the heat of her core as he rolled his hips, grinding his rock-hard length against her center.

  All it took was one brush of his tongue along the seam of her lips and she opened them. At her silent invitation, one hand gripped her waist as the other threaded in her hair, tilting her head to give him a better angle for access. His tongue pushed past her parted lips and the moment it touched hers his entire body exploded with need unlike he’d ever felt before. He explored her wet, velvety tongue and she met him lick for lick. He had thought he was in danger of drowning in her stare, but he’d been wrong. It was her kiss that did it. He was floating, completely submerged in the sensations rushing through him.

  He hadn’t even heard the doorbell ringing or Cap barking until she pulled away and breathlessly said, “Dax, the door.”

  Tornado-force lust was spinning through him but he made himself step back and lower her to the ground. Her full lips glistened and her eyes were heavy with lust as she gazed up at him with wanting.

  “Hold that thought.” He kissed her once more, this time on her forehead just to be safe, before turning and heading towards the door.

  He couldn’t even begin to process what had just happened. That wasn’t just a kiss…that was more. That was epic. That was life changing. That was a religious experience.

  The ringing continued and he fought the urge to yell through the door that no one was home and stalk back to the kitchen to pick up where they’d left off. If he actually thought that would work, he would probably have tried it. But whoever was there sounded persistent.

  Before opening the door he adjusted himself so that his off the charts arousal wasn’t evident to his unexpected visitor. And he was glad that he did, because as the door swung open he saw that it wasn’t just one person on the other side, it was two. His mom and sister.