SHIPS CompanionSHIP, FriendSHIP, RelationSHIP

by K'Anne Meinel

  Grace was devastated. She had known Joan’s restlessness over the years meant something. She’d never been able to put her finger on it. All those trips to various cities around the world. All those mysterious disappearances for a few hours. Joan would bring her odd trinkets and jewelry to hide the accountancy of time. Grace hadn’t been suspicious but now it all made sense. She’d seen the number of times Joan had headaches. Joan had said the doctors attributed it to the blow but had never let on about the clot.

  The doctor indicated the brain scans. It showed that the clot had moved to a critical point in the brain. Joan would not be going home from this one. Graces throat tightened up and she felt a blow to her stomach. Something was gripping her heart, squeezing it remorselessly. The doctor stayed with her until she got a hold of herself. After he left she phoned Craig, Adam, and Bryan. One by one they showed up in the waiting room with their wives. She waited until they were all there to tell them the news. How many times over the years had they all met up in rooms like this she thought. Births, grandchildren’s overzealous play that would require stitches or whatever, Graces beating, Joan’s poisonings and Beth’s attack, and a few other less traumatic incidences. The final one that caused the end of a life so full.

  One by one they visited Joan when her headache had subsided. Everyone knew it might be for the last time. She spoke with each one, making them feel special. She knew they knew. She could see it in their eyes, the hurt, the devastation, the fear of loss. Time after time they teared up and she joined them. She explained over and over her position. She had known for over a decade that this was coming. She knew that every moment had been precious and needed to be lived to the fullest. She didn’t regret anything except the lack of further time with them. Her grandchildren came to her bedside as well. The youngest two wouldn’t remember this grandma but the family would never let them forget who she was.

  Finally Grace was alone with her. Her face showed her devastation. Joan actually felt very good but didn’t want to go home to the chalet to die. She wanted it remembered as a sanctuary to the family. Her affairs were in order. She had made sure of that over the years. Grace understood now, everything. She was hurt that Joan had never confided this one thing with her but Joan made her understand finally. She hadn’t wanted everyone walking on egg shells. She’d had more than ten extra years. That amount of time with everyone knowing would have not been as special. Had they known they might have behaved differently and she hadn’t wanted that burden on them. She wanted Grace to know how much she had loved her, how special their nearly 20 years together had been. She was leaving with no regrets.

  Joan died that morning in Graces arms. The blood clot shifted and it happened very suddenly. Graces last view of Joan was as she was fading away, a smile on her lips as she went limp. Grace kissed her cooling lips goodbye as the monitors beeped out the flatline. They unhooked everything from her and covered her with a sheet. Grace left the room and went to the crowded waiting room. Everyone could see by her tears that Joan was indeed gone. She had made her good-byes to them. They knew she had loved ALL of them.

  Joan had died only two days after her 60th birthday. Announcements went out all around the world. It even made the papers all over. Her funeral was held a week later in order to allow people from far away to attend. Massive amounts of flowers decked the open casket. Joan had been specific for those final arrangements. A polished wooden casket, simple but beautiful was where she lay. Her casket was open until the end of the service. She wanted her family to say one last goodbye, close the book and move on. Her wake at the chalet was attended by almost everyone who had attended the funeral. Congressmen, art dealers, employees, tons of people, and family all attended the largest party that Joan was involved in. The family joked that she would have loved to attend. Joan would have appreciated their humor. By the end of the day the family sat in the entertainment area as Joan’s lawyer read her will and played two of the tapes. Everyone got copies but the first viewing was for everyone. Joan had made individual tapes for each of the family including her youngest grandsons. Her touch was felt by all. She’d left an incredible legacy.

  Joan had left the chalet and grounds to Grace out right. Grace had always owned equal shares but now it was fully hers to do with as she wanted. The foundation would pay for it’s maintenance for life. She’d also left her the shares in the house in Barbados where they had spent so many years together. Her tape to Grace would be watched later in private.

  The foundation was left to her son’s out right. She hoped that they would continue on as they had since it’s inception all those years ago. She hoped that her grandchildren might want to continue in the tradition. She made sure a trust was set up for each grandchild to go to the college of their choice. It would pay their way completely through college and any monies thereafter would be given out right at the age of 30. Her personal wealth was immense and she left that in trust for the foundation to avoid paying inheritance taxes. Her art would continue to generate money to be put in the trust. Her galleries as long as they continued to be profitable would be handled by the trust. The trust was to be administered by her wife, her three sons, and their spouses. She named each one specifically. In the event of their death’s a new trustee would be appointed by the remainder so that at no time would an even number of trustee’s exist. That way votes could be taken about issues that would arise.

  Her video’s first showed her from years ago and had been updated twice over the years. The difference in her waist length braids to the shoulder length ones to having her hair combed out and straight was a stark contrast. She specifically asked each of her son’s to take care of Grace, her love, her life. The poignant memories that she mentioned brought a new flood of tears to everyone who listened. The youngest grandchildren had been left to sleep and be watched over by Amelia. The adults were so moved by this final gift from Joan. How like her to think of all of them in their time of need. How like her to leave this lasting memento of her love for all of them.

  Grace waited a full day to watch her video from Joan. She needed the time to collect her own thoughts. She hadn’t been prepared for this. She had always thought that being the older one in their relationship that she would go first. She had thought they’d have another 20 years. Finally watching the video was harder than she could believe possible. Joan had made it over the last 12 years, continually adding to it as she could when she was in Wausau and wanted to say something. She had driven her lawyer nuts but he was well paid for any inconvenience over the years. Grace watched the changes of Joan over the years. The words, the sounds, the inflections of her voice were like a soothing balm on her heart. This incredible woman had loved and been loved. She reached out from her grave to comfort Grace once again. Grace watched the tapes over and over again until she memorized them.

  Grace arranged for all of Joan’s clothing to be taken to the Salvation Army, it was the only charity that Joan believed actually used those type of things and she would have approved. Her personal things such as jewelry Grace slowly gave to her son’s and grandchildren over the years. Joan’s engagement and wedding rings Grace wore around her neck on a chain. Grace wore the set of hands that had been given to her on her wedding day much of the time. The necklace, the anklet, the bracelet, the earings, their matching hands still beautiful after all these years, she had them put in a frame and hung on her bedroom wall, she couldn’t see herself wearing them again, the rings were enough. They so reminded her of Joan’s love for her. She had framed the note that the jewelry came with years ago. She sat down and watched the video of their wedding, repeating the section of their vows and Joan’s lovely words. She went through their wedding album looking at the pictures. She paged through other albums they had kept over the years enjoying what they had shared.

  If Grace had thought she would be lonely she was sadly mistaken. Her grandchildren and her son’s and daughter’s as she thought of them continually visited her. There were very few days that she actually found herse
lf alone. Not only had they taken Joan’s words to heart but they truly accepted Grace as their own. She’d been in their lives for the last 19 years and they weren’t going to let her go. Joan’s death had only made them all more aware of the passage of time and how fragile their time with their loved ones could be.

  Grace lived to the ripe old age of 85. Her children, her grandchildren, and even her great grandchildren were there for her all those years. The ones who didn’t remember or had never met Joan were constantly being told stories about that great lady. Her art, her books, her legacies, her touch were always around. To Grace’s dying day she felt Joan’s presence in that house. Even going to Barbados and Hawaii she found Joan’s presence beside her. She caught herself talking to her when no one else was around. She didn’t want them to commit her for her idiosyncrasies. She wrote to Joan in her journal. Joan talked to her in her mind. She never again loved another person like Joan, she didn’t even try. As she got older her friends died one by one but she always had Joan to rely on. Quietly one night she just went to sleep. Her grandson Kevin found her when she didn’t come down for breakfast in the bed she had shared with Joan . He was going to UW Stevens Point and staying at the chalet with Grandma.

  Graces funeral wasn’t as grandiose as Joan’s. She wasn’t as well known. Many of her friends had died over the years. All of the gang from California was gone. Her son’s, their wives, her grandchildren, and even her great grandchildren mourned the loss.

  They say your spirit lingers to watch your body be put in the ground. Many of the family swore they saw Grace at the graveside. Joan came and took her by the hand as they walked in the opposite direction away from the family.

  Goodbye Joan.

  Goodbye Grace.

  You were loved by so many you will be missed by all of them.